AJ gripped the phone a little tighter. “You didn’t look too disgusted in those photos.”
“I know,” she said immediately. “Of course, the leaked photos would be the ones of me laughing at his ridiculousness. And according to that stupid made-up story, we left together. I left him standing there after I threatened to get my lawyers involved if he didn’t stop threatening me.”
“He’s threatening you?”
“Not physically, AJ. He’s just threatening to leak his identity, among other things. He hates that you’re getting all this attention from Clair’s allergic reaction. It’s so him. He couldn’t care less that she almost died. All he cares about is that you got the sympathy—the glory of the caring stepdad—while her real dad has never stepped up. The statement you made didn’t sit well with him either. He thinks you were calling him out. It’s why he got the stupid tattoo. He didn’t say so, but I know it.”
AJ didn’t comment. He could kick himself now for having said what he had to the press. He’d been pissed at the time. Maybe he had said it to send a message. Clearly, he wasn’t too far off about this guy. He was a fucking idiot. But he didn’t mean for it to cause any stress for Addison.
“I’m sorry if he’s harassing you because of what I said.”
“Don’t be,” she said with conviction. “If the truth hurts, that’s too bad. He’s proven time and time again that he is an idiot.”
AJ nodded, waiting for her to go on, but she didn’t. “What else?”
“What do you mean what else?”
“You said among other things. What else is he threatening you with?”
Again she quieted then finally sighed loudly. “I’ve always known there was a sinister side to him. I suspected it when he turned so cold on me the day I told him I was pregnant then again the day way back in Chicago when he brought up his rights as a father. In all the years he’d had rights, not once had he chosen to use them as a threat, until he found out I’d begun dating. It felt evil. He hated that I was dating again, but he especially hated that it was you.”
“Why?” AJ felt his insides heating all over again.
“I don’t know,” she said, but AJ got the feeling she did. “Because of who you are? How popular you are and how much Clair obviously loves you? It kills him to hear about it and see the photos of you and her laughing and seeing her so happy around you, when I don’t want anyone to even know about him. He’s made other things clear too. Like that he’d never sign off his parental rights so that you could legally adopt her. It’s ridiculous. No one’s ever even mentioned it, but he’s already thinking that far ahead.”
“Who is this guy, Addison?”
Silence.
“Why can’t you just tell me? You know you can trust me. I’d never tell anyone.”
“I know,” she whispered.
“Then tell me.”
“I will,” she whispered again. “Only I can’t yet. But I will. Just let me take care of a few things. You finish your season and then we’ll talk about everything. About us. I promise.”
Us.
It was hard to wrap his mind around how one little word could fill him with such happiness and hope. All these days he’d been gearing himself up for the biggest fight of his life. Yet at the same time a part of him was preparing his heart for the possibility of losing that battle. He knew nothing mattered more to Addison than Clair, and having her go against her better judgment when it came to her daughter’s well-being was what he was up against. So the possibility of losing them was all too real.
Hearing her promise they’d talk about “us” calmed the adrenaline he’d begun to feel coursing through his body. It was pathetic really, but it was all it took and he gave in.
“Okay,” he said, exhaling a bit frustrated. “Addison?”
This was something he’d wanted to ask Clair, but he got the feeling Clair wasn’t taking the break up as well as she was pretending to. So he hadn’t wanted to upset or make her feel like the middle man between him and her mother. Even now he hesitated to ask, but given what she just promised, it couldn’t be helped.
“Yes?”
“Will you be at the playoffs in St. Louis?”
“I will,” she said softly. “All three games.”
That made him exhale even heavier. Despite the relief that he at least could anticipate seeing her in two days, he had to bite his tongue at what he was so tempted to ask her now: if there was any way he could see her today.
“I gotta go,” she said, squashing any temptation he might not be able to fight. “I have a call I need to be on in a few minutes, but I had to apologize about ever blaming you. I feel terrible—”
“Stop,” he said, shaking his head with a frown. “So it was the popcorn, but we both know giving her ice cream that could’ve been contaminated was irresponsible. It was the only good thing that came out of this. I learned my lesson and I’ve been doing my homework. Trust me. If—” He stopped himself, shaking his head. “When things go back to the way they were before all this happened, how excessively diligent I’ll be from now on might even get on your nerves. I had no idea that you can never be too careful when it comes to this stuff.”
She was quiet again. As happy as he was to hear her after not really talking to her or seeing her for too long now, the mood of the call was a strange one. He was glad for the hope it’d given him, but he couldn’t help feeling there was still something very wrong that she wasn’t sharing with him.
“Good luck with the playoffs. You guys have this. I know it. Most importantly”—she laughed suddenly, surprising him—“Clair knows it, and you can’t argue with her stats.”
AJ smiled, pushing the bittersweet emotion he felt over hearing Addison speak of Clair, the little girl who now owned the other half of his heart. He’d begun to daydream about adopting her someday just before the horrific incident, but now he knew her asshole dad would never let that happen.
Chapter 27
AJ
This series was the first time AJ played on the same field as Bigsby since the incident at the ESPYs. AJ had been searching for all the silver linings he could about Clair’s incident. This was another one. Because of her incident, the stories and speculation about his feud with Bigsby had died down until just recently. Some sportscasters had discussed just how professional Rage would be about being on the same field with Bigsby.
First of all there was no feud. The guy had been a rude asshole to AJ’s girl and he snapped. End of story. At least he thought it was until Bigsby forfeited coming over to greet him or any of the other players as he normally did before the first and second games. The guy hadn’t said a single word to him the entire first two games, and AJ certainly wasn’t kissing anyone’s ass, least of all an arrogant asshole that got off easy as far as AJ was concerned. Just as he threatened that day, if Bigsby ever tried anything like that again, AJ would react exactly as he had the first time. Worse because he’d already warned him once.
But the first two games had gone over without a hitch, and the Padres were up by two games now. He even had dinner with Addison, her parents, and Clair both nights. There was nothing romantic about it. AJ got the distinct impression she had a lot more going on in her head. Yet there were times he saw it in her eyes: a strange shine. While he hadn’t had much alone time with her and the odd demeanor made him nervous, it was a start. He’d at least gotten to see her, and just being around her and Clair had been beyond satisfying.
It was during batting practice of the third game that AJ noticed the missed call from Addison then the text.
Has Clair called or texted you by chance?
It was odd and slightly alarming. Why would Addison be asking him this now? He scrolled through his texts, but he had nothing from Clair. Nor did he have any other missed calls. Instead of texting Addison, he called her.
“I was being interviewed when you called,” he said as soon as she answered. “I just read your text. No, she hasn’t. Why? What’s up?”
?
??I can’t find her.”
It felt as if she attempted to hide the fear in her voice, but AJ hadn’t missed it, and instantly he was anxious. “What do you mean you can’t find her?”
“I can’t find her,” she said, the anxiety clearly spiking now. “It’s a long story, but I’m sure she’s here in the hotel somewhere. I have to go, so I can go search for her. She’s just a little upset, so she’s probably hiding somewhere, trying to scare me.”
“Wait, wait,” he said, glancing around to see if by chance Clair was there already. “How long has she been missing? And what was she so upset about?”
Addison had never mentioned Clair acting out and doing something like this.
“Over an hour,” she said, and AJ could hear the accelerated breathing like she was walking fast. “It’s a long story, AJ. I can’t get into it now.”
“Give me the short version,” he said, his muscles already tightening up because he had a feeling what it might be about.
She exhaled loudly. “Basically, she knows about her dad and all the accusations and threats he’s been making. You know her. She heard about the photos and the tattoo, but kept it to herself, until she overheard me talking to my dad about it earlier today. When she heard me say something about giving into his requests to meet her and spend time with her, she got upset. She hates him already based on the things he’s been saying.”
The fire was instant. Clair was missing and Addison sounded on the verge of another near breakdown like the one she had in the theater. All because of this asshole.
“Addison, who is this guy and what the fuck is he accusing you of or threatening you with?”
He’d already started to pull off his catcher’s gear and was headed to the locker room when he heard her cry out and he froze. “What is it?”
“Clair! Don’t you ever do that me again!” he heard her say, completely broken up as the sound muffled.
Then he heard it—just like at the hospital—the most beautiful sound in the world: Clair’s voice. She was crying too and saying she was sorry. The phone muffled again. Then he heard Addison’s voice still broken up. “AJ, I found her. She’s fine.”
While it was an enormous relief, it still wasn’t enough. He heard Clair asking her something; then suddenly Clair’s voice was on the phone. “I love you, AJ” she said, and AJ could hear she was crying too.
“I love you too, Clair Bear,” he said as the emotion overwhelmed him, alleviating the utter rage he’d begun to feel.
He turned because the guys were flagging him down. They were getting ready for the opening ceremonies.
“Listen, sweetheart,” he said, starting back towards where the starting lineup was forming for the national anthem. “I’m gonna have to get going. The game’s about to start, but I’m so glad you’re okay. Please don’t ever scare us like this again.”
“I’m sorry,” she said, sniffling. “I didn’t mean to scare you or Mom. I was just sad.”
“Don’t be sorry,” he said, gripping the phone a little tighter. “Promise me you won’t worry or be sad about anything anymore. Everything’s gonna be fine. We’ll talk about all this after the game. Let your mother know I said that, okay? We are talking about this tonight. For now, just hurry up and get down here. I need my two girls here to cheer me on.”
“I promise,” she said, sounding a little less down. “And, AJ, I would never in a million years believe that you would purposely try to hurt me.”
He stopped walking, even though the coach was motioning for him to hurry. “Who said I would hurt you?”
Addison said something in the background. The phone was muffled, and the line suddenly went dead. It was just as well; the announcer was already introducing the boy band who’d be singing the national anthem, and the girls in the crowd were going crazy. He wouldn’t have been able to hear anything, so he started walking again without trying to call Clair back. Then it came to him—what Addison had said earlier in the conversation. She knows about her dad and all the accusations and threats he’s been making.
This guy was accusing AJ of purposely trying to hurt Clair? That motherfucker. Oh they were talking about this tonight. Clair obviously knew now. There was no reason to keep this under wraps anymore, and AJ was getting to the bottom of who this asshole was once and for all.
~~~
For the first five innings, AJ did his best to focus on the game. He did what he’d done many times in the past, what his coaches had been telling him to do for years. He made the rage work for him, not against him. Already he’d hit one out of the park, putting the Padres up by three. He was at the plate again, trying not to think about the worst thing Clair’s dad could do or say: accuse him of hurting Clair. The only thing worse would be if the idiot ever dared to hurt Clair himself. But emotionally he had already. And tonight could’ve been so much worse—because of him.
As Addison said, a little girl wandering around a hotel by herself, even one as bright as Clair, was in danger. Because she was distraught and not herself, things could’ve ended so much worse. When Addison mentioned how someone could easily pull her into his room, AJ had been ready to forfeit his game so he could get back to the hotel and break down every door if he had to. Once they’d found Clair, he had every intention of going after the guy responsible for her being so upset. He still did, but he had to get through this first.
After his first at bat bringing in three runs and as hot a hitting streak AJ had been on lately, it was no surprise that Bigsby was on his feet and not crouched behind the plate. He held his arm off to the side for the first pitch way outside. They were walking AJ. The crowd’s reaction was mixed. Some cheered, others—the Padres fans in the house—booed.
AJ smirked, scratching his nose with his knuckles before setting up for the next pitch. Maybe it was because, aside from when he’d run around the bases after hitting one out of the park earlier, this was only the second time tonight he felt like smiling. Maybe it was because Big Mouth Bigsby, who usually had plenty to say especially to AJ, had yet to say a word to him these entire two and a half games, and AJ knew why. He was still pissed about the ESPYs. Or maybe it was just that AJ needed to let out a little steam—piss someone off—so he chose that moment to do something Bigsby would do. Bust his balls.
“I already made this my house earlier.” AJ hit the side of his cleats one by one with the bat to rid them of any dirt stuck underneath. “What good’s it gonna do you to walk me now?”
“What did you say?” Bigsby said, getting in AJ’s face so fast it caught AJ by surprise, but he backed up with a smirk when the ump got in between them and other players began to surround them.
Bigsby was a bigheaded and rude asshole, but AJ had never known him to be a hothead. His face was all red, but while he put on a good show of having to be held back, he held his hand up in a gesture that he was letting it go. This time AJ did the same thing. Only he held his arms up to his side, feigning innocence, even as the crowd started to chant a mixture of “Rage! Rage! Rage!” and “Fuck Rage!”
Coach Lara stood in front of him, cautiously reminding him he didn’t want to get ejected or worse suspended, but AJ wasn’t even trying to argue. Luckily, Bigsby calmed fast enough that the benches and bullpens didn’t have to clear. The ump issued warnings to both benches before giving the “play ball” sign after all the other players had gone back to their positions.
To AJ’s surprise, Bigsby crouched down behind the plate. Had AJ’s ball-busting comments really made Bigsby change his mind, and they decided not to walk him after all? Amused, AJ got in position to hit again. He’d love nothing more than to hit another one out of this asshole’s house again.
It took a little longer than normal for the pitcher and Bigsby to agree on the next pitch. When they finally did, the next pitch came flying fast and straight at AJ, beaming him in the shoulder. Instantly enraged, AJ dropped his bat ready to charge the mound at the pitcher, who was thrown out immediately by the ump, and this time the benches did clear.
>
“My house, asshole!” he heard Bigsby say, and it dawned on AJ just then they had no intention to pitch to him at all.
This wasn’t the pitcher’s doing. It was Bigsby’s. He turned toward Bigsby, who was still pointing at him over the guys holding him back. “My house! My everything, you hear me?”
Bigsby pushed off the guys in front of him and held his arms up, pulling up his sleeves as he continued to taunt AJ, even though AJ wasn’t really trying to come at him full force yet. It was a cheap shot, and for a second, AJ actually considered that maybe he should’ve known better. Everybody knew assholes like Bigsby were good at dishing it out but could never take it when the tables were turned. This was the playoffs, and the guy was probably already frustrated that they were down by two and this game wasn’t looking good for them either.
Then he saw it.
Bigsby was still holding his arms up in a “come at me” motion and running his mouth, repeating the same shit over and over. “My house! My everything. You get nothing. You hear me? It’s all mine. Always has been.”
The moment he saw it he nearly froze. AJ’s eyes zoomed in on the tattoo on Bigsby’s inner forearm, and in the next instant, his eyes were on Bigsby. The guy smiled smugly when he realized AJ had just seen it.
“All mine!” was the last thing AJ heard before everything seemed to go silent. Nothing but a buzz rang in his ears now, and the inferno was lit inside him.
The horrifying reality of what this meant became clear: Addison had lied to him so effortlessly the night Bigsby got in her face, the night that had ended so beautifully, and this asshole was Clair’s dad.
Rage.
It was fast, unforgiving, and detonated the loudest. This piece of shit was responsible for the tears of both his girls tonight. This was who was accusing AJ of trying to hurt Clair.
“My everything!” Bigsby yelled again.