“And how are you doing?” Cale asks, coming over to me.
“I’m okay,” I sigh, feeling mentally and physically exhausted. “I said I’d come back in the morning…that we can try to fix things.”
“Sonny and I will come back with you.”
“Aunt Steph and Uncle Paul will be here then.”
“I know,” Cale says. “But I need to talk to Dex, too. Figure some stuff out with him.”
I meet his eyes, understanding.
I think we all have a lot to figure out.
“We gonna get out of here?” Sonny asks. “I fucking hate hospitals.”
“Let’s go,” I say.
We all start walking toward the elevators. I get my cell from my bag.
I missed two calls and a text from Tom.
I check the time on the first call. He called while I was here, about thirty minutes after I saw him on the street with that woman.
Does he know about Dex? But then, who would have told him? Why did he call? He told me he doesn’t care about me.
Fingers trembling, I open up the text.
We need to talk. Call me.
That’s it?
I’m assuming he doesn’t know about Dex then. Well, I’d like to think that if he did, his text would say something more than that. I know he’s a bastard, but I don’t think he’d be that callous.
And really, what do we need to talk about? How he doesn’t give a shit about me? How he has clearly moved on from me?
Thanks, but no thanks.
I haven’t heard from or seen him in two weeks, and after I see him with some woman, he calls and texts.
Probably feeling guilty or even worse sorry for me.
Yeah, well, I don’t need his goddamn pity.
I delete his text and clear my screen of his calls. I speed dial Aunt Steph. She and Uncle Paul should be in the air now on their way here, but I wanted to let her know that I’ve seen Dex.
I listen through her voice mail greeting. “Hey, it’s me. I just saw Dex. He’s doing okay. The doctor said he’s gonna be fine. I mean, obviously, he’s not fine, but he will be…with some help. I just wanted you to know that I’ve seen him, and he’s doing okay. I’m gonna head home because they won’t let us stay any longer with it being so late here. Call me when you land, and I’ll come get you at the airport.”
I’m going to have to borrow Cale’s car to pick them up since mine is only a two-seater.
Just as I’m thinking that, Cale puts his arm around me.
We come to a standstill at the elevators. Sonny presses the button, and I rest my head against Cale’s chest while we wait. I’m thankful to have them. I might not have Tom, but I have the best friends a girl could wish for. The elevator arrives, and we all get in. When we reach the ground floor, I walk out with Cale’s arm still around my shoulder.
We approach the electronic doors. They slide open, and the night air brings a chill in with it. I shiver. I’m still in my cutoffs and T-shirt.
Cale rubs my arm. “You cold?”
I smile up at him. “I’m okay.” Then, I look ahead.
That’s when my heart falls out of my chest.
Tom is standing across the road, leaning up against his Range Rover, his eyes fixed on me.
A Breath Later—Outside of Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, LA
Tom pushes off the car and starts to walk toward me. His eyes don’t waver from mine as his long legs eat up the distance between us. He’s still wearing the same clothes he was in earlier. The thick stubble graces his chin.
He looks as hot as ever. I hate that.
My feet are glued to the spot, my legs shaking. I feel Cale’s grip tighten on my shoulder.
To say Cale is not happy with Tom is putting it mildly. Cale is my best friend. I tell him everything, and I told him what happened between me and Tom—well, barring the sex details, of course. I also left out some of the crueler things that Tom said to me. I knew if I told Cale those, he would have gone to Tom’s house to have words with him, and the last thing I want is those two fighting.
Cale is pissed at the way Tom left things with me. I’ve tried to make Cale understand that Tom hasn’t really done anything wrong—apart from being a mean bastard when he ended things. He never led me on, never gave me false promises. If anything, he was always honest with me.
It’s my fault that I fell in love with him.
The fact that Tom doesn’t feel the same is not on him. No matter how much I want to be angry with Tom, feelings just aren’t something that can be controlled.
From the start, I knew that Tom wasn’t a feelings kind of guy. It just took him telling me the way he did for it to hammer home.
Although…him being here right now is doing nothing for my heart.
Tom comes to a stop a foot away from me. Up close, I can see how tired he truly looks. He has dark circles around his eyes, like he hasn’t slept in a really long time.
My heart starts to pound in my chest.
“Lyla.” His voice is raspy, but it still feels like a balm over the open wound on my heart. I realize that I miss him more in this moment than I have in the last two weeks. It hurts to have him so near and not be mine.
“Hi.” My voice sounds small. I hate that. I need to woman up.
I take a fortifying breath. All I managed to do is breathe Tom in. His familiar scent. It reminds me of times lost.
Pain lances across my chest.
Tom’s eyes flicker to Cale’s hand on my shoulder, and they harden. Then, his eyes come back to me, and they soften in my gaze.
“Are you…” He scratches the stubble on his chin before his fingers work up to the hair on his head. He tugs on the strands. “Can we, um…talk?”
I don’t know why, but I look at Shannon. Maybe it’s because I know she’ll encourage me to talk to him, and encouragement is what I need right now because my head is saying to tell him to fuck off. Even though my heart is reaching her grubby little fingers out in desperation for him.
Shannon does encourage me. Talk to him, she mouths.
I look back to Tom. I can see the unease lining his face, his body tense, as he waits for my answer.
It hurts to look at him.
I look over his shoulder and say, “I don’t know.”
“Please, Lyla.”
The angst in his voice has my eyes coming straight back to him.
He looks afraid.
I take a deep breath. “Okay…”
That one word from me has him visibly relaxing. It has me wondering what’s so important that he needs to talk to me urgently.
I turn to Cale, causing his hand to slip from my shoulder. “Head on home without me. I’ll see you there.” Then, I remember that I’m Shannon’s ride. “Could you give Shannon a ride home? If that’s okay with you, Shannon?”
“Sure it is.” She smiles big. She’s happy that Tom’s here to see me. I think beneath her cool exterior, is a closet romantic.
Cale hasn’t even looked at me yet. His eyes are angry and on Tom. I don’t know if Cale is going to be difficult about this or not. Then, he drags his stare from Tom to me. “Ly, I’m not gonna try to talk you out of speaking to him. You do what you gotta do. But you need me, you call me, and I’ll come straight away.”
“I know. Thank you.” I smile, touching his arm.
He turns his eyes back to Tom, jaw clenched. “I don’t care who the fuck you are. You hurt her again, and I’ll come after you—”
“We’ll come after you.” Sonny steps up.
My heart plummets. Tom’s not exactly a pacifist, and I really don’t need a confrontation between them all right now.
Tom looks between the both of them, then, he sighs. “I fucked up. Hugely. I know. I’m not planning on hurting Lyla again, if I can help it. But if I do, then I deserve whatever I have coming.”
Well, holy shit. My heart flutters back to my chest, and begins to beat double time.
Cale looks at Tom with a renewed sense of respect. He
gives Tom a sharp nod and turns to walk away. Sonny gives Tom a hard stare and follows Cale.
Shannon lingers a moment, giving me a big smile and a mini thumbs-up, before she trails after Cale and Sonny.
Listening to her heels clack against concrete, I ease my eyes back to Tom to find his eyes on my chest with an unnamed emotion on his face.
“You’re wearing”—he gulps down—“the shirt I bought you.”
There’s something resembling hope in his eyes.
Shrugging, I toss my hair over my shoulder. “Don’t read anything into it. I just happen to like the shirt. How did you know I was here?”
He pushes his hands in his back pockets, rocking on his heels. “Shannon. She called me when you first arrived here. You were talking with the doctor.”
I frown at her retreating back. That sneaky little biatch. We’ll be having words later.
“Don’t be angry with her,” Tom says softly. “She thought that you might, um…need me. Well, she said that after she chewed my ass out for hurting you.” His jades meet with my blues. “I’m so sorry, Ly.”
I want to tell him that I don’t need his apologies, and I don’t need him here, but it would be a lie.
I look away. “When did you get here?”
He shifts on his feet. “I came as soon as I got the call. I’ve been here a few hours or so.”
My heart squeezes. I hate that he can make me feel this way. “You waited out here all that time…for me?”
His shoulders lift, his eyes pinned to the ground. “I wanted to make sure you were okay.”
“Why didn’t you come inside?”
The doors whoosh open behind me, and some people walk out.
Tom and I move away from the doors, giving us a little privacy.
Standing before me, closer now, he says, “I wanted to come in and see you, but I didn’t know…how things stood with you, whether you would want to see me. I know what Shannon said, but when you saw me earlier, you bolted…so I wasn’t sure.” His eyes dim.
A chill attacks my body as I remember exactly how I felt when I saw him on the street with that woman. “You were with someone.”
“I can explain that. I called you before Shannon called me because I saw your face. I knew what you were thinking.” He takes a step nearer. “We need to talk.”
I look up into his face. “About?”
“Us.”
“There isn’t an us.”
He shakes his head. “No, but there should be.”
His words shake me to my core. I can’t find any of my own to attempt speech.
“But before us…” He lifts his hand like he wants to touch me, but then he lowers it. “Are you okay? Your brother…is he okay? Shannon didn’t know anything when she called.”
I wrap my arms around myself. “Dex is gonna be okay…physically…but he tried to, um…he tried to…he overdosed.”
Tom nods. “Shannon said.”
I swallow down. “Luckily, the pills didn’t make it into his system, so there’s no permanent damage or anything.”
“That’s good.” He moves a little closer. “Most importantly, how are you?”
I shrug, looking past him. “Dealing. There’s a lot to figure out, but I’ll get there. I always do.”
“You will. You’re the strongest person I’ve ever known.”
He reaches out again to touch me, and this time, he doesn’t stop. His fingertips graze the skin on my arm. Heat sears into me.
I want and need him, but I don’t know what he wants from me. I don’t know what I saw earlier or what he’s been doing during the time we’ve been apart, and I can’t forget how badly his words hurt me.
Confused, I step back, away from his touch. “Don’t…”
Disappointment fills his eyes, frustration lining his brow. “Ly, the woman you saw with me earlier—”
“I don’t want to talk about this right now.” Fear hits me, quickly turning to panic. I might want the truth but not right now. My heart can’t take another beating tonight.
“I know this is the worst timing ever, but it’s not what you think. The woman you saw earlier is my sister.”
That gets my attention.
“You have a sister?” I’m relieved but surprised.
He glances around, like he’s checking for people. “Yes,” he answers, bringing his stare back to me.
“How did I not know—” I cut myself off. “Of course I didn’t know. You never told me anything about yourself, but then again, we were only fucking, like you said. So, why would you share? Now that we’re not fucking, am I allowed to ask if you have just the one sister or more? Any brothers? Pets? Do you have any kids I don’t know about? A girlfriend?”
I’m stepping into the crazy zone, but I can’t help it around him. He brings out the crazy in me.
“Just the one sister. No brothers. No pets. Definitely no kids.” He gives me a grim smile with his hands locked behind his neck, showing off the taut muscles in his arms.
Even in this difficult, fraught-with-emotion moment, my attraction for him flares.
“And no girlfriend.” He gives me a pointed look. “You’re right. I haven’t shared anything with you about my life…but I want that to change. I need to tell you some things about me…things I need you to understand.”
“Why?”
“Lyla…”
“No, Tom. Why do you need me to understand you?”
He shifts, his arms wrapping around his chest. “Because I care about you.”
“Oh, you care about me now. Funny, because only two weeks ago, you couldn’t give a shit about me. What’s changed?”
“Everything…everything’s changed.” He thrusts his hand through his hair, his eyes skirting our surroundings. “Can we just not do this here?”
“Here is as good as any place. You wanna talk? Talk to me here.” I’m digging my heels in. I’m being difficult. I know that, but I don’t feel like giving him easy right now.
“Lyla, the things I need to say to you are not things I want to air in public.”
Remembering who Tom is and how his life would be fodder for the press, as would be my own, I huff out a sigh. “Fine. Where do you want to talk?”
“My house.” He gives me a hopeful smile.
“Your house?” My first and only time there was our last night together. “I don’t know.” I retreat back a step.
“Just to talk.” He holds his hands up. “Nothing more.”
I run a hand through my hair, my fingers getting stuck in the tangled ends. “Okay…I guess. But my car is here, so I’ll have to follow you there.”
“Or you can leave it here, and I can bring you back to it later.”
I tilt my head, eyeing him with suspicion. “What would be the point of that?”
His eyes turn serious. “I’d get more time with you.”
My heart bursts out of my chest and wraps herself around him.
But my angry head tells me that he could have had the last two weeks with me, if he’d pulled his head out of his ass before now.
“Okay,” I acquiesce, handling my feelings. “Your car it is.”
I follow Tom over to the Range Rover, feeling a little surprised when he opens the door for me. Hand on my back, he helps me in. His touch burns through my clothes.
He doesn’t even try for an ass grab.
I don’t know whether that’s a good thing or not.
Feeling rattled, I try to calm myself while Tom rounds the car to the driver’s side.
He climbs in and shuts his door with an expensive clunk.
Then, it’s just him and me in his car in the dark.
Suddenly, everything seems so much more pronounced.
The sound of my breathing, the thumping of my heart.
Tom’s breaths, his aftershave, the strength and size of him in this small space.
It’s all overwhelming me.
He starts the car, and the middle of that song by Bryan Adams starts to play.
&
nbsp; The song that he said reminded him of me. The one I’ve tortured myself with for the last two weeks.
Heart in my throat, I glance across at him. I’m pretty sure my feelings are scrawled all over my face.
He reaches his hand over and gently touches my cheek with his fingertips. “I’ve been listening to it a lot these last couple of weeks.”
Speechless and on the verge of tears, I look away from him and out the window.
Twenty Minutes Later—Tom’s House, LA
The drive to Tom’s house was quiet. I spent the whole drive trapped inside my head, wondering what he wants to talk to me about and also trying to figure out what I want to say to him.
He pulls up outside the gates to his house. Using a remote, he opens them.
Watching them part slowly, my heart goes into overtime.
By the time he’s pulled up outside his house, my heart is attempting a cage break through my ribs.
Without a word, Tom gets out of the car. I unbuckle my seat belt and open my door.
Tom’s here, and he takes my hand, helping me out. My body jolts at the feel of his big hand touching mine, electricity snaking through my body, desire pooling between my legs.
No matter what’s happening between Tom and me, my body will always want him.
As I climb down, I see his eyes skim my legs, a flare of desire igniting in them.
I feel a shot of relief. It’s good to know I still have that effect on him. I was beginning to worry that it had gone. He didn’t once look at me in a sexual way since seeing him tonight at the hospital.
His fingers thread through mine, clutching my hand.
I freeze, my heart warring with my head.
“Don’t pull away. I just need to hold you…even if it’s a small part of you.” His voice is thick with meaning.
His chest is pressed against my shoulder, reminding me how good it feels to have Tom’s body touching mine.
My head starts to spin.
Lifting my head, I stare up into his eyes and nod.
With his grip tight on my hand, he leads me into the house and straight to the living room.
It’s the first time I’m seeing it. It’s much like his bedroom—manly, dark wood, white walls, a comfy-looking black L-shaped sofa, a huge flat screen on the wall.
“Can I get you anything to drink?” he asks, leading me toward the sofa.