“That smells good,” Gabe said. “Irina was asking for you. I’ll watch it if you want to see what she needs. I think she just wanted to be reassured you were close by.”
Tatiana nodded and untied her apron. “It is still all new and strange to her. And to me,” she added. She was glad to escape his presence. He disturbed her in ways she couldn’t put her finger on. Though she knew he and Mike were identical twins, she had no trouble now telling the two of them apart.
Irina sat in a corner of the large nursery with blocks spread around her. She’d built a house for her bear and was busy peering inside. She squealed when she saw her mother and ran to hug her. Tatiana spent a few minutes with her, then started back to the kitchen. She heard Gabe singing. In a deep baritone voice, he sang something about walking by faith and not by sight.
A longing as sharp as a cramp gripped Tatiana. Where did these Christians get their blind faith? How could they ignore the bad things that happened around them and to them and still worship this Jesus? She hadn’t understood it when Sergio was alive, and she didn’t understand it now. But to have such confidence in the future was very alluring. Her heart was in a quandary of fear and trepidation about what would happen to her and Irina. To be able to rest in someone else’s strength would be wonderful.
The sting of tears awoke her from her reverie. Shaking her head, she continued on to the kitchen. She wouldn’t be that weak. Standing on her own might be hard, but it was something she was proud of. She shivered at the thought of turning that burden over to someone else. It was hers, and she would bear it.
After supper, she put the dishes in the dishwasher while Gabe took Irina to the family room and put on a video for her to watch. It was something called “Adventures in Odyssey.” Tatiana wanted to see it herself, so she hurried through her chores in the kitchen. Once the dishes were cleared, she prepared batter for blinis for breakfast and put it on the stove to rise.
Irina was giggling as Tatiana walked into the family room. She was curled up in the crook of Gabe’s arm with her thumb in her mouth.
“Irina!” Tatiana said sharply. “Your thumb.” She frowned and shook her head.
Irina’s smile faded, and she reluctantly pulled her hand away from her mouth.
Gabe’s lips tightened, but he didn’t say anything. Tatiana sat in the rocker and watched the rest of the video. She laughed with the rest of them, and she found her spirits lighter as she carried Irina upstairs and put her to bed. It was nice to feel part of a family, even if it was only temporary.
The next day sped by. She asked Grace to take her to a place that sold used clothing and found several suitable dresses for herself as well as a warm coat. Grace insisted on buying her a new dress as well, but she didn’t like the feeling of accepting charity. When the older woman seemed to receive so much joy from it, Tatiana didn’t have the heart to refuse.
The next few days fell into a pleasant pattern. She cooked, cleaned, washed, and nurtured the family. When they visited the hospital, even grumpy Martha seemed to relax when she heard the glowing reports from the rest of the family about how well Tatiana was caring for them all.
Tatiana took special care to plan the party menu. She took her plans to Grace.
“Goodness, Tatiana, this is much more elaborate than even Martha would have done. You have four appetizers alone! Are you sure you want to go to all that trouble?”
“The cooking, I enjoy,” she said. “The menu, it is adequate?”
“More than adequate. My guests will try to steal you away from me.” Grace laughed and handed the menu to her.
Tatiana smiled and went back to the kitchen. If only a male guest would show some interest. Though it was going to be hard to distract herself from Gabe. He occupied her thoughts way too often.
§
Saturday night, Tatiana washed the last counter and turned out the kitchen light. The dinner had gone splendidly. The guests had raved about the food, and Grace took pride in showing off Tatiana. Grace’s thoughtfulness had warmed Tatiana’s heart. Unfortunately, there had been no men young enough to be interested in a wife. The only unmarried man had been Major MacGregor, and his gaze had never left Grace’s face. Tatiana smiled at the memory.
Grace insisted she take Sundays off, but she had prepared casseroles for their meals and would just have to slip them in the oven. The thought of a day of rest was appealing. She had felt she was on trial this entire week, though she knew none of the Salingers felt that way.
She went to the door leading to the family room. Gabe had his feet on the coffee table while Mike lounged on the love seat with his feet propped on the back of it. The careless posture of these Americans was atrocious. Unconsciously, Tatiana straightened her own shoulders.
Grace saw her in the doorway and smiled. “There you are. I was about to come looking for you. We leave for church about nine. Gabe will pull the Jeep up front and honk. Wear your new dress. I’m eager to see you in it.”
Tatiana gulped. How did she tell the older woman she had sworn never to set foot in a church? She caught Gabe’s amused glance. He knew her feelings and was enjoying her discomfiture; she could see it on his smug face. She opened her mouth to refuse, but the words stuck in her throat. How could she disappoint Grace when she had done so much for her? It would be churlish.
She narrowed her eyes at Gabe. “Very well,” she said quietly. Astonishment raced over Gabe’s features, but he quickly hid it. He evidently caught her warning, for he didn’t say anything. And why would he? He was a Christian, too. They all thought she needed to be converted, whatever that meant. Even Sergio had prayed for her, much to her chagrin. But her parents hadn’t raised her to accept such fairy tales.
She escaped as quickly as she could. The thought of sitting in a stuffy church all morning didn’t appeal at all to her. She’d attended the state church once when she was a teenager, but the stained glass and the rituals were intimidating. Everyone had known the moves but her, and she was in no hurry to feel so foolish again.
She sighed and peeked in on Irina. She had taken to this new life like she was born to it. Her curls lay on the pillow around her small head, and she slept peacefully. Tatiana closed her bedroom door and went to run her bath. Tomorrow would be an ordeal.
§
She awoke feeling as though she’d barely slept. Sunshine streamed in the window, and she could hear the sounds of showers running. Grace had her usual radio station playing. WFRN, your friend, it often said. In spite of herself, Tatiana had listened to it over the past few days and some part of her was drawn to the uplifting music and the family values it spoke of.
A heavy ball of dread formed in her stomach as she dressed in her new dress. The periwinkle sheath skimmed her figure and fell to her calves. Looking in the mirror, she thought she wouldn’t disgrace the Salingers today. She caught the top of her shoulder-length hair back in a bow and then went to get Irina ready.
Gabe’s voice echoed from Irina’s room. Tatiana stood in the doorway and listened to him talk to her daughter. “You have really pretty hair.”
Peeking inside, she saw him brushing Irina’s curls. She was already dressed in her new red dress. Her hands clasped in her lap, she sat with her head still, which was more than she usually did for her mother.
Gabe looked up and saw her in the door, and his eyes widened. “Wow, you look—you look lovely.” He looked away quickly. “Mother got Irina dressed and told me to brush her hair. I’ve probably made a mess of it.”
He was actually doing a pretty good job, but she wasn’t about to tell him. “You think we are not ready in time? Your mother, I promised. I would not go back on my word.”
“Caught you, didn’t she?”
She scowled at him. “Only because I love your mother. I will not enjoy it.”
“Don’t make your mind up before you get there. You might like it.”
“Faith is too dangerous,” she said. “I would not wish Irina to be harmed.”
“You’re in America now,” he said. ??
?It’s not dangerous here. Yet.”
Yet. What did he mean? She stared up at him, then mentally shrugged. Who knew what these Christians meant by anything they said? They spoke in riddles and language she didn’t understand. “Her hair I will finish.” She held out her hand for the brush.
He gave her a cheeky grin and handed it to her. “Was I doing that bad of a job?”
She didn’t answer but simply pulled the top of Irina’s hair back and secured it with a bow.
“Here’s her shoes.” He handed her a pair of patent leather shoes Grace had bought.
She took them and slipped them on Irina’s feet. “Ready, my lamb?”
“Can I take Pooh?” Irina picked up her bear and clutched it close to her chest.
“Sure,” Gabe said before Tatiana could refuse.
Tatiana stared at him doubtfully. “You are certain?” In the church of her memory, such frivolity would be frowned upon.
“Some parents even take coloring books and crayons to keep the kids busy. But we have Sunday school and junior church, so she’ll have fun.”
The words were incomprehensible to Tatiana. School? What did they teach? She was almost afraid to find out. But surely one lesson wouldn’t harm Irina. She would try to find an excuse from now on. She took Irina’s hand and turned to Gabe. “We are ready.”
“We usually stop for breakfast. I’ll get Mother.”
“Mike is not going?” How did he get out of it?
“He might show up for church.” Gabe’s eyes darkened.
So Mike wasn’t a Christian. Could that be the difference she sensed in the two men? Could that be the strength and reliability she sensed in Gabe? The thought was a bit disconcerting. She and Irina followed Gabe down the hall.
Grace came from the living room and smiled when she saw them. “You both look darling.”
“What about me?” Gabe asked in an injured tone.
“You, too, Son. But just look at our girls. Irina’s curls are so lovely.” She touched the little girl’s head.
But Gabe wasn’t looking at Irina, and the expression in his gaze sent Tatiana’s heart racing. She looked away. Going to the closet, she got out her coat and slipped it on, then put Irina’s on her.
Gabe picked up Irina, and she wrapped one arm around his neck while the other still clutched her bear. She pressed her cheek against his. The sight gave Tatiana a strange pang. Turning away, she went to the door and held it open for him to carry Irina to the car. Grace bustled along behind him.
They rode to town in silence, but it wasn’t the uncomfortable sort that left her searching for something to say. It was companionable, as though they’d done this trip many times. After stopping at Burger King for a quick breakfast, Gabe turned back onto Indiana 15 and seemed to be leaving town again.
“Your church, it is in the countryside?” How strange for a large, spired building to be built where no one could admire it.
Gabe nodded. He didn’t seem inclined to explain, so Tatiana lapsed into silence again herself. They drove for several minutes, then turned onto a country road. Moments later, they turned into the parking lot of a brown-and-tan building with a small white steeple. The church building was one story and unassuming. New Life Bible Church, the sign said. This was a church? Her husband had told her the church he attended in St. Petersburg was in a small building, but she had thought it was his way of dismissing her fears of the usual grand edifice.
The tension in her shoulder muscles eased, and she smiled at Irina as she unbuckled her car seat. Gabe lifted the little girl out and carried her through the snow to the church. Several smiling people, men and women alike, stood near the entrance. They shook her hand, exclaimed over Irina, and welcomed her to the service. Gabe took Irina away to the place he called Sunday school, and Tatiana felt strangely bereft at his absence.
She wanted to sit in the back where no one would notice her, but Grace led her to a cushioned pew near the front of the church. In spite of its unassuming exterior, the inside of the church was gracious with warm oak trim and accents as well as a beautiful wooden cross at the front. Before she had finished looking around, Gabe joined them in the pew.
“Irina, she is happy?” Tatiana curled her fingers into the palms of her hands. She didn’t know why she felt so anxious.
Gabe smiled reassuringly. “She’s fine. Playing with the other kids and showing off her Pooh.”
Tatiana let out her breath and turned her gaze from Gabe’s probing eyes. She focused on the front of the church again. The pastor, Steve Parks, stepped to the front and welcomed the people to church. An attractive man in his forties with penetrating blue eyes and black hair shot through with silver, he mentioned Tatiana by name, and she wanted to shrink back into the pew.
Next they sang songs. Grace held a songbook for her to look at the words. One song in particular tugged at Tatiana’s heartstrings in a way that made her want to flee the church.
Be still, my soul; the Lord is on thy side. Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain.
She had never felt the sense of knowing someone powerful was on her side. A film of tears obscured her vision, and she blinked furiously. She mustn’t cry. Gabe and Grace would think the service was affecting her. Digging her nails into the palm of her hands, she managed to get hold of her emotions. She would get through this service and find a way to get out of ever coming again.
seven
Gabe sighed and closed his desk drawer. Customers changing their minds, problems with contractors. . .had this week finally ended? He grabbed his coat and headed toward the door.
“Hey, wait a sec, Gabe.” Mike hurried toward him with another man in tow. “I wanted you to meet Jason Bechtol before I brought him home with me. He’s with Marlow and Truly, the new contractors in Fort Wayne.”
The man reminded Gabe of a basset hound with the bags under his eyes and the morose air that seemed to hang around him. His brown eyes and light brown hair all blended together with his sallow skin, and he seemed colorless. The name was familiar, though.
“Pleased to meet you.” Gabe shook his hand, releasing it as quickly as politeness would allow. He hated a limp-wrist handshake.
“Jason is interested in meeting Tatiana.” The smile Mike flashed was full of pride and self-congratulation.
The muscle in Gabe’s jaw twitched. Did Mike seriously believe this wimpish guy would make a suitable mate for Tatiana? He controlled his temper with an effort. “I see.”
“My divorce was final six months ago, and I thought I might start looking around,” Jason said. His voice was as colorless as his appearance.
Looking around. Gabe wanted to tell him Tatiana wasn’t a car, but he refrained. The man was a colleague, after all. “Why were you divorced?”
Mike’s eyes widened at the impertinent question. He shot Gabe a pleading glance and shook his head slightly. Gabe ignored him. He didn’t want Tatiana marrying some guy who would beat her or something.
A hint of red tinged Jason’s colorless cheeks. “Uh, well. . .” His voice trailed off, and he looked away. Clearing his throat, he continued. “We grew apart. You know how things are.”
In that moment, Gabe realized why the man’s name was familiar. It had been all over the papers. He’d been caught with another woman, and his wife had come after him and the girlfriend with a gun. The ex was in jail, and the girlfriend had dumped him and married some tycoon from Chicago.
He stared from Jason to Mike. Mike colored at the accusation Gabe didn’t try to hide. He shuffled his feet and looked away. “Uh, we’d better get going, Gabe. I told Mother we’d be there in fifteen minutes.”
He had no choice but to follow his brother and Jason to the exit. The March wind whipped down Canal Street, and he poked his icy fingers under his coat. Waving Mike on, he stopped at Metro Espresso for a cappuccino. He needed a minute to himself. This needed delicate handling. Tatiana would be sure to think he was interfering if he threw the guy out of the house.
Sipping the hot drin
k, he drove slowly toward home. The lights blazed from the house as he turned in the driveway. His heart sped up a bit at the thought of seeing Tatiana. These past few days he’d looked forward to coming home as never before, and he didn’t like the realization. It really would be best to find her a husband and get her gone from the house, but his heart ached at the thought.
The welcoming scent of some kind of beef dish teased his nose when he shut the door behind him. Every night there had been some new culinary delight to try, and it smelled like tonight was no exception. His mouth watered at the aroma. He hung his coat in the closet and walked toward the kitchen. The murmur of voices grew as he neared the welcome warmth of the kitchen.
Tatiana stood with flour on her hands as well as a dusting on her nose. She was smiling up at Jason, and Gabe didn’t like the expression on her face. She looked—interested. He cleared his throat, and she turned toward the door. Her smile faded when she saw Gabe, and she stepped back and wiped her floury hands on her apron.
“The meal, it will be ready soon,” she said.
He stepped further into the kitchen. “Smells good. What is it?”
“Beef Stroganoff.” She leaned over a skillet and stirred the bubbling concoction. A flush tinged her cheeks, and she avoided his gaze.
“Tatiana is quite the cook,” Mike said. He enumerated her good qualities the way an owner listed a car’s attributes. Gabe expected the sticker price to come next. “The house is always spotless, and you should taste those blini things she makes for breakfast. She made that dried flower arrangement in the entry—you had to have noticed it.”
The color on Tatiana’s face deepened, and she stirred the skillet more briskly. “It was nothing. Anyone could do it.”
Mike laughed. “I couldn’t.” He took Jason’s arm and tugged him toward the door. “We’ve got a few minutes before dinner. Let me show you the wallpaper she put up in the laundry room.”
Jason was staring at Tatiana with a besotted expression on his hangdog face, and Gabe clenched his hands into fists. He couldn’t be—jealous—could he? Gritting his teeth, he held his tongue until Mike succeeded in dragging Jason away to see evidences of Tatiana’s qualifications to be the perfect wife. His brother had no sense. He’d always known it, but this was indisputable proof.