She was where I belonged.
“And I’m yours,” I swore to her.
I watched her work to swallow and then struggle to find the right words. Finally, she whispered the truth. “I’m scared.”
“Me too.”
“What if this is a mistake?”
“What if it’s not?”
Her hand flicked out and slapped my chest. “Can you just give me an answer? Just one! None of this rhetorical question bullshit?”
“So feisty…” My attention had fallen to her lips. I needed to kiss her. That might help her along.
“Sebastian, I’m serious. I need something substantial here. I need something real.”
My focus flipped back to her eyes and I knew she was right. I needed to give her something that would draw her to me and keep her there. I needed to be completely honest.
Bare.
I needed to show her how desperately I needed her.
“Sera, I never intended to leave you behind all those months ago. I just wanted to protect you. I wanted to keep you safe from a monster I thought could destroy you. But what happened instead was that I destroyed us. You recognized what I was doing before it ever crossed my mind. I didn’t intend to suffocate you or mislead you. And I certainly never intended to postpone our permanent future with you. I thought I was doing what was best for us. It seemed like the worst time to ask you to marry me. And when I looked around at our friends, especially at Talbott, who had lost Lilly just after they became engaged, well, honestly, to ask you to marry me then felt incredibly selfish and insensitive. Of course, I should have expressed my feelings to you verbally. I should have said these things out loud. I thought… I don’t know what I thought. I guess I assumed you would just read my mind and figure it out for yourself. These things seemed obvious to me. It was honestly a little shocking to me that you hadn’t thought of them on your own.” I watched with a small amount of amusement as her face heated with fury and her body stiffened beneath me. But I wasn’t finished. “And then you left me and I realized who the real fool was… me. I realized how much of an idiot I had been. With some space between now and then, I have a little more perspective. I pushed marriage away to protect us. And you pushed for marriage to protect us from other people, aka Terletov. We both wanted the same thing, but our applications of what we wanted were executed poorly.”
“That’s an interesting way to look at things,” she murmured thoughtfully.
“It is,” I agreed.
“When did you figure all this out?”
I grinned at her, “Yesterday.”
She hit me again. “For real?”
“No, not yesterday. But it took me much longer than it should have.”
“So that’s it? You just decided we love each other and we should be together now? That’s like an executive order and I just have to step in line?”
I dropped a kiss to the tip of her nose and then brushed one across her parted lips. God, she was so very beautiful and she just had no idea how much she owned me. She had no idea that she was the one in charge.
I couldn’t compete with her complete authority.
“Tell me you don’t love me.”
“Sebastian…”
“Tell me, Sera. Tell me that I’m imagining this thing between us. Tell me that I haven’t felt your Magic wrapped up in mine for days now. Tell me that you can move on from me and that you can imagine being with anyone other than me.”
Waiting for her to answer was the most torturous few moments of my life, worse than anything Terletov had put me through. The idea that she could even think about being in love with someone else cut through me and ripped the separate halves of my soul to pieces.
I thought back to Lilly’s wedding and the hours I’d been subjected to watching her dance with her date. I wanted to kill the Russian with my bare hands.
This woman before me was my past, present, and future.
We belonged together.
Her cheeks turned a rosy pink and she lifted her beautiful blue eyes to mine. Usually, I compared them to ice because they were so crystal-like and clear. But at this moment they were much too hot to be considered ice. They burned with her response, sizzled with the heat of her feelings for me.
I held back my victory smile out of respect for the Russian.
Yeah, right. I held back nothing.
“You know I love you,” she grumbled. “You know I never stopped loving you. Isn’t that why you brought me here? Isn’t that why you threw that huge speech at me?”
I leaned down and captured her smart mouth with mine. I didn’t wait for us to warm up or remember what we were doing. I dove right in and plunged my tongue into her mouth.
We’d done this often enough that I figured we’d remember the logistics quickly enough.
I had been right.
My other hand moved to her waist too and I yanked her to me. Her hands shot to my shirt and clutched at it frantically. I pressed my body into hers, forcing her back against the bedpost again.
Our mouths moved in hungry synchronization. We kissed, licked and bit at each other, desperate to taste and reclaim as much as we could, as fast as we could. This was something as familiar as breathing to both of us.
And I relished it… Worshiped this moment.
It was like coming home. It was like finding my center after a lifetime of being off-balance.
“Sera,” I breathed.
She wrapped her arms around my neck and clung to me. That was the only encouragement I needed.
I picked her up and tossed her onto the bed, following her down before she even settled on the mattress. Her hands reached for my chest immediately, smoothing them out against my heart.
I was about to dive in for more kisses when her words stopped me. “I want to be with you again, Bastian. I want this to work.”
“It will work,” I swore to her. And I believed that it would. I would do anything it took to make this work.
I would not give up on us ever again.
“How do you know?”
“Because it never stopped working, Sera. We just gave up before we got to the good stuff.”
A small smile touched her lips and I leaned down to kiss the corner of her mouth. I had to keep touching her… tasting her. I wanted to spend the next thousand years in this bed.
I wanted to spend the next ten thousand years with this woman.
“This is the good stuff?” she laughed lightly.
“This is just the beginning of the good stuff. There is so much left to get to with you.” I propped myself up with one hand and used the other to trace a line from the hollow of her throat to her navel. “I love you, you beautiful, stubborn, strong-willed woman. And I am sorry I let you think differently. I’m sorry that it took me so long to come fetch you.”
“Fetch me?” she laughed.
“Fetch you,” I confirmed and then sobered. “You should never have felt as though I didn’t want you. That was never true. I have always wanted you. And I always will want you. I was just… I was just stupid. There is no other word for my behavior and poor decisions than stupid.”
“I was just as much to blame. You don’t have to be so hard on yourself.”
“It doesn’t matter now,” I murmured. “We both know better now.”
“We do.”
I dropped down to give her slow, sensual kisses that I hoped reinforced my words. I knew I had a long way to go to make up for the trust I destroyed, but it was my number one priority. I would earn back her trust and every bit of her love no matter how long it took. And then I would spend the rest of my life keeping it.
In the last few days I had been told that I was redeemed for my family’s misdeeds, for the selfishness I flaunted.
But it was only because of this woman. She redeemed me.
She was my redemption.
After several long, blissful minutes, she pulled back and hit me with a very serious expression. I swallowed a sudden lump in my throat and waited for her
to deliver the blow.
“I’m happy we had this discussion,” she said glibly. I nodded, trying to smile. I could feel the qualifier coming a mile away. I just wanted it over. Not that it would stop me from keeping her. I would just have to try more unconventional ways. Like kidnapping. “But,” she continued. See? I knew it was coming. “But, I don’t want you to feel pressured or rushed or anything. I think we just need to take this slow and see where things go. It’s sweet that we think we love each other, but we’ve watched this dissolve once before. It’s taking a lot of strength on my part not to doubt this entire endeavor. I just… I just can’t be hurt like that again, Bastian. I want to take this slow.”
I nodded like I understood, like those were the exact same thoughts I had been having.
They were in fact, the opposite thoughts I had been having.
“Sure,” I croaked. “We can take this slow.”
“It’s just that… I know I had been pushing for marriage like crazy before we broke up and I just… I just don’t want you to think I’m still like that. We could never get married and I would still be happy. It’s not important to me like it was back then. So if you could just, er, forget I was ever like that… that would be great.”
I continued to nod. I probably resembled one of those idiotic bobble head toys, but I couldn’t seem to put two words together.
“I love you,” I told her just to get her to say it back.
“I love you too.” Her words were balm to a suddenly aching heart. I needed to hear the conviction in her voice, the truth in those words.
I relaxed some after she said them, but not enough.
I had run from the idea of marriage before, but the excuses I gave myself before weren’t an option anymore. Lilly and Talbott were married. The twins had been safely delivered. Terletov’s army had been completely dismantled and it was only a matter of time before we caught up to him.
And I had nearly lost this woman.
More than once.
If I had been opposed to marriage before, I was now adamantly an advocate.
Except, now Seraphina had decided to slam on the breaks.
So I decided to do something I promised myself I would never do. I promised myself that I would go into this conversation with an open mind and be completely flexible to Seraphina’s wishes.
I also promised to be perfectly honest.
So, when I told Seraphina that she had nothing to worry about and that I wasn’t thinking about marriage either and that she could relax… I broke every single one of my promises and lied straight to her face.
She didn’t seem quite convinced, but I erased the rest of her worry with another talent of mine… kissing.
And I didn’t stop. I couldn’t.
I had been deprived of this for much too long. My lips knew exactly how to tease her into a lusty frenzy. And her tongue knew exactly how to bend me to her complete and utter will.
We were lost to each other, just the way we should be.
Just the way we were supposed to be together.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Seraphina
I watch a gnarled hand reach down and pick up an infant by the throat. His fingers curl maliciously around the tiny neck and squeeze. The sharp, yellowed nails dig into the soft flesh of the baby.
My heart leaps to my throat and my lungs freeze. No!
“You’ve taken everything from me,” the monster hisses maliciously. He hovers near a bottomless pit, dangling the baby over the edge.
The mother screams out for her newborn son, promising whatever the monster wants. But it’s too late. He’s wanted revenge for too long to make placating deals. Now he just wants to hurt and harm.
Now he just wants to kill.
I’m so afraid for the baby boy that it takes me several long moments to realize he’s also holding a tiny little girl. She’s just as small as the boy, but her raging scream pierces louder than the boy who bleats angrily. She is pissed and if she had teeth I know she would have turned the monster’s knotted hand into a bloody stump by now.
It makes me proud of the little thing. I love her spunk. I love her outrage. She is so like her mother.
Those thoughts create a well of sadness inside me. I love these children and I am going to watch them die.
The cavern is filled with shouts and threats, but the monster has leverage while he holds the children. How did he find them?
“You’re next,” the monster grins at the mother. “But maybe you’ll follow them willingly.” A horrific silence pauses all time and thought. And then in one swift thrust, the monster flings the screaming babies into an abyss so deep and dark that I know without a doubt they are lost forever.
The mother screams a ragged, broken sound and dives in after them.
And then we all go. The entire Kingdom jumps into the pit to be swallowed up in darkness forever.
I jolted awake, trembling and shaken to my core.
Sebastian sat up with me, stirred by my sudden panic. His arms reached around my waist without question and he tugged me against his chest. His whispered words soothed against my hair, but my mind refused to comprehend them.
“The twins, Bastian.”
I felt him still next to me. His body turned to stone with the words on my lips. “What are you talking about?”
“A vision.” My voice was a tattered rasp. Fear and despair had wrapped around my throat and threatened to choke me to death. “I dreamt… I dreamt that Terletov found the babies.”
“Sera…” The opposite of mine, Sebastian’s tone was a harsh warning that reminded me of how dangerous he could be when provoked. I felt hysterical terror. He felt the call to action and decisive planning. “Tell me.”
“In my dream, Terletov had the children. And he killed them, Sebastian. In front of all of us.”
“I love you,” he whispered gently against my temple. His tone and words were at such contrast from the rigidness of his body that I jerked. He pressed a sweet kiss against my skin and then jumped out of bed.
He thrust his legs into jeans and yanked on a t-shirt. He grabbed his phone off the nightstand and punched in a number. The phone rang against his ear for a long time. Nobody picked up. He pulled the phone away, looked at it and dialed again. After three times of this, he must have given up on that caller and dialed a new one.
“Talbott,” he demanded once the other end picked up. “Are you in the castle? Don’t come here then. We think the twins are in danger. Wait for orders and you can meet us.” He hung up and dialed another number. “Meet us in Avalon’s room in three minutes.” He hung up again and dialed a third number. “Mimi, we’re coming up in two minutes… all of us… well get him dressed… It’s an emergency, Little Sister. Get ready… No time. I’ll explain when we get there.”
I had been watching him partly stunned from the bed. When he hung up on his sister, he whirled around to face me. His hard gaze softened when he found me still rumpled in bed, but I could feel the desperation to get moving radiate from his body.
“Get dressed, Sera. We’re going after Kiran and his family.”
“What if it was just a dream?”
“Was it?”
My stomach clenched with nerves and a sick feeling washed over me. “No,” I confirmed.
“Neither Eden nor Kiran will pick up. The team sent after Terletov has not been able to locate him. I think your dream tracked him down.”
His words spurred me into action. I jumped from bed and threw on the same clothes I’d been wearing since the Gypsy village. I shoved my feet into my shoes and threw my hair up into a high ponytail.
“Sebastian, in my vision, the twins-”
“No, Sera. We won’t let it happen. I won’t let it happen. Let’s go.”
I hurried after him as he ran down the hallway and up the stairs to Avalon’s room. Jericho and Olivia were just coming from the opposite way when we reached the propped open door. Sebastian and Jericho shared a grave look and then we all entered the dark
room.
Avalon sat at the edge of his bed with his face buried in his hands. When the four of us entered, he looked up with fear plastered all over his face. “It’s Eden.”
“Seraphina had a vision,” Sebastian explained quietly.
“He got to them. I feel it. She is blocking me for some reason, but I can still vaguely feel what’s going on.” Avalon rose to his feet and cursed viciously. “I don’t think it’s her though. I don’t think she’s intentionally blocking me. I can feel her fear and… something is very wrong. But I can’t get through to her.”
“Why not?” I demanded. This was my one hope. Avalon was supposed to know where she was. He was supposed to be able to locate her immediately.
“I don’t know!” He picked up a chair and threw it across the room. It crashed into the wall and splintered to pieces. Amelia threw her arms around his waist and he crumpled against her.
“She’s near a Source,” Sebastian said, snapping his fingers. “She has to be.”
Avalon’s head popped up with understanding. “That’s right. We’ve always lost contact near one. India… the prison here. Morocco. It makes sense.”
“So which one?” Jericho demanded.
“One that’s still active,” Amelia said. “If it’s blocking your connection then it still has to be working. And she would have had to travel there quickly. It’s only been thirty-six hours since we lost him and he would have had to go all the way to Paris, figure out a way to get to them and then forced them to move.”
“He has the twins,” I offered. “That’s how he got their cooperation.” A stiff silence moved through us as my words settled over our small group. “He couldn’t have moved very far with all of them in toe.”
“What if he went back to St. Stephens?” Sebastian suggested. “The Source in Peru was still active, but changed. Whenever Eden and Avalon have dealt with one, they’ve, for lack of a better word, absorbed it. But the one in Vienna didn’t die either; it became something else, something significantly darker.”
I perked up. “That would make sense. We watched it turn. Terletov obviously had more plans for it.”
Avalon winced and pressed his fingers to his temple. “It’s a gamble,” he finally said. “I have no way of confirming this theory.”