CHAPTER IV.
_Cit._ "Speak, speak." _I Cit._ "You are all resolved rather to die than to famish?" _Cit._ "Resolved, resolved." _I Cit._ "First you know, Caius Marcus is chief enemy to the people." _Cit._ "We know't, we know't." _I Cit._ "Let's kill him, and we'll have corn at our price. Is't a verdict?"--_Coriolanus._
The most inveterate Manhattanese, if he be anything of a man of theworld, must confess that New York is, after all, but a rag-fair sort ofa place, so far as the eye is concerned. I was particularly struck withthis fact, even at that hour, as we went stumbling along over anatrociously bad sidewalk, my eyes never at rest, as any one can imagine,after five years of absence. I could not help noting the incongruities;the dwellings of marble in close proximity with miserable, lowconstructions in wood; the wretched pavements; and, above all, thecountry air of a town of near four hundred thousand souls: I very wellknow that many of the defects are to be ascribed to the rapid growth ofthe place, which gives it a sort of hobble-de-hoy look; but, being aManhattanese by birth, I thought I might just as well own it all atonce, if it were only for the information of a particular portion of mytownsmen, who may have been under a certain delusion on the subject. Asfor comparing the bay of New York with that of Naples on the score ofbeauty, I shall no more be guilty of any such folly, to gratify thecockney feelings of Broadway and Bond Street, than I should be guilty ofthe folly of comparing the commerce of the ancient Parthenope with thatof _old_ New York, in order to excite complacency in the bosom of somebottegajo in the Toledo, or on the Chiaja. Our fast-growing Manhattan isa great town in its way--a wonderful place--without a parallel, I dobelieve, on earth, as a proof of enterprise and of the accumulation ofbusiness; and it is not easy to make such a town appear ridiculous byany jibes and innuendoes that relate to the positive things of thisworld, though nothing is easier than to do it for itself by setting upto belong to the sisterhood of such places as London, Paris, Vienna, andSt. Petersburg. There is too much of the American notion of theomnipotence of numbers among us Manhattanese, which induces us to thinkthat the higher rank in the scale of places is to be obtained bymajorities. No, no; let us remember the familiar axiom of "_ne sutorultra crepidum_." New York is just the queen of "business," but not yetthe queen of the world. Every man who travels ought to bring backsomething to the common stock of knowledge; and I shall give a hint tomy townsmen, by which I really think they may be able to tell forthemselves, as by feeling a sort of moral pulse, when the town is risingto the level of a capital. When simplicity takes the place ofpretension, is one good rule; but, as it may require a good deal ofpractice, or native taste, to ascertain this fact, I will give anotherthat is obvious to the senses, which will at least be stronglysymptomatic; and that is this: when _squares_ cease to be called_parks_; when horse-bazaars and fashionable streets are not calledTattersalls and Bond Street; when _Washington_ market is rechristened_Bear_ market, and Franklin and Fulton, and other great philosophers andinventors, are plucked of the unmerited honors of having shambles namedafter them; when _commercial_ is not used as a prefix to emporium; whenpeople can return from abroad without being asked "if they arereconciled to their country?" and strangers are not interrogated at thesecond question, "how do you like _our city_?" then may it be believedthat the town is beginning to go alone, and that it may set up foritself.
Although New York is, out of all question, decidedly provincial,laboring under the peculiar vices of provincial habits and provincialmodes of thinking, it contains many a man of the world, and some, too,who have never quitted their own fireside. Of this very number was theJack Dunning, as my uncle Ro called him, to whose house in ChambersStreet we were now proceeding.
"If we were going anywhere but to Dunning's," said my uncle, as weturned out of Greenwich Street, "I should have no fear of beingrecognized by the servants; for no one here thinks of keeping a man sixmonths. Dunning, however, is of the old school, and does not like newfaces; so he will have no Irishman at his door, as is the case with twoout of three of the houses at which one calls nowadays."
In another minute we were at the bottom of Mr. Dunning's "stoup"--whatan infernal contrivance it is to get in and out at the door by, in ahotty-cold climate like ours!--but there we were, and I observed that myuncle hesitated.
"_Parlez au_ SUISSE," said I; "ten to one he is fresh from someBally-this, or Bally-that."
"No, no; it must be old Garry, the nigger"--my uncle Ro was of the oldschool himself, and _would_ say "nigger"--"Jack can never have partedwith Garry."
"Garry" was the diminutive of Garret, a somewhat common Dutch Christianname among us.
We rang, and the door opened--in about five minutes. Although the terms"aristocrat" and "aristocracy" are much in men's mouths in America justnow, as well as those of "feudal" and the "middle ages," and this, too,as applied to modes of living as well as to leasehold tenures, there isbut one porter in the whole country; and he belongs to the White House,at Washington. I am afraid even that personage, royal porter as he is,is often out of the way; and the reception he gives when he _is_ there,is not of the most brilliant and princely character. When we had waitedthree minutes, my uncle Ro said:
"I am afraid Garry is taking a nap by the kitchen fire; I'll try himagain."
Uncle Ro did try again, and, two minutes later, the door opened.
"What is your pleasure?" demanded the _Suisse_, with a strong brogue.
My uncle started back as if he had met a sprite; but he asked if Mr.Dunning was at home.
"He is, indeed, sir."
"Is he alone, or is he with company?"
"He is, indeed."
"But _what_ is he indeed?"
"He is _that_."
"Can you take the trouble to explain which _that_ it is? Has he company,or is he alone?"
"Just _that_, sir. Walk in, and he'll be charmed to see you. A finegentleman is his honor, and pleasure it is to live with him, I'm sure!"
"How long is it since you left Ireland, my friend?"
"Isn't it a mighty bit, now, yer honor!" answered Barney, closing thedoor. "T'irteen weeks, if it's one day."
"Well, go ahead, and show us the way. This is a bad omen, Hugh, to findthat Jack Dunning, of all men in the country, should have changed hisservant--good, quiet, lazy, respectable, old, gray-headed Garry, thenigger--for such a bog-trotter as that fellow, who climbs those stairsas if accustomed only to ladders."
Dunning was in his library on the second floor, where he passed most ofhis evenings. His surprise was equal to that which my uncle had justexperienced, when he saw us two standing before him. A significantgesture, however, caused him to grasp his friend and client's hand insilence; and nothing was said until the _Swiss_ had left the room,although the fellow stood with the door in his hand a most inconvenienttime, just to listen to what might pass between the host and his guests.At length we got rid of him, honest, well-meaning fellow that he wasafter all; and the door was closed.
"My last letters have brought you home, Roger?" said Jack, the moment he_could_ speak; for feeling, as well as caution, had something to do withhis silence.
"They have, indeed. A great change must have come over the country, bywhat I hear; and one of the very worst symptoms is that you have turnedaway Garry, and got an Irishman in his place."
"Ah! old men must die, as well as old principles, I find. My poor fellowwent off in a fit, last week, and I took that Irishman as a _pis aller_.After losing poor Garry who was born a slave in my father's house, Ibecame indifferent, and accepted the first comer from the intelligenceoffice."
"We must be careful, Dunning, not to give up too soon. But hear mystory, and then to other matters."
My uncle then explained his wish to be incognito, and his motive.Dunning listened attentively, but seemed uncertain whether to dissent orapprove. The matter was discussed briefly, and then it was postponed forfurther consideration.
"But how comes on this great moral dereliction, called anti-rentism? Isit on the wane, or the
increase?"
"On the wane to the eye, perhaps; but on the increase so far asprinciples, the rights, and facts, are concerned. The necessity ofpropitiating votes is tempting politicians of all sides to lendthemselves to it; and there is imminent danger now that atrocious wrongswill be committed under the form of law."
"In what way _can_ the law touch an existing contract? The Supreme Courtof the United States will set that right."
"That is the only hope of the honest, let me tell you. It is folly toexpect that a body composed of such men as usually are sent to the StateLegislature can resist the temptation to gain power by conciliatingnumbers. _That is out of the question._ Individuals of these bodies mayresist; but the tendency there will be as against the few, and in favorof the many, bolstering their theories by clap-traps and slang politicalphrases. The scheme to tax the rents, under the name of quit-rents, willbe resorted to, in the first place."
"That will be a most iniquitous proceeding, and would justify resistancejust as much as our ancestors were justified in resisting the taxationof Great Britain."
"It would more so, for here we have a written covenant to rendertaxation equal. The landlord already pays one tax on each of thesefarms--a full and complete tax, that is reserved from the rent in theoriginal bargain with the tenant; and now the wish is to tax the rentsthemselves; and this not to raise revenue, for that is confessedly notwanted, but most clearly with a design to increase the inducements forthe landlords to part with their property. If that can be done, thesales will be made on the principle that none but the tenant must be, asindeed no one else _can_ be, the purchaser; and then we shall see aqueer exhibition--men parting with their property under the pressure ofa clamor that is backed by as much law as can be pressed into itsservice, with a monopoly of price on the side of the purchaser, and allin a country professing the most sensitive love of liberty, and wherethe prevailing class of politicians are free-trade men?"
"There is no end of these inconsistencies among politicians."
"There is no end of knavery when men submit to 'noses,' instead ofprinciples. Call things by their right names, Ro, as they deserve to be.This matter is so plain, that he who runs can read."
"But will this scheme of taxation succeed? It does not affect us, forinstance, as our leases are for three lives."
"Oh! that is nothing; for you they contemplate a law that will forbidthe letting of land, for the future, for a period longer than fiveyears. Hugh's leases will soon be falling in, and then he can't make aslave of any man for a longer period than five years."
"Surely no one is so silly as to think of passing such a law, with aview to put down aristocracy, and to benefit the tenant!" I cried,laughing.
"Ay, you may laugh, young sir," resumed Jack Dunning; "but such _is_ theintention. I know very well what will be your course of reasoning; youwill say, the longer the lease the better for the tenant, if the bargainbe reasonably good; and landlords cannot ask more for the use of theirlands than they are really worth in this country, there happening to bemore land than there are men to work it. No, no; landlords rather getless for their lands than they are worth, instead of more, for thatplain reason. To compel the tenant to take a lease, therefore, for aterm as short as five years, is to injure him, you think; to place himmore at the control of his landlord, through the little interestconnected with the cost and trouble of moving, and through the naturaldesire he may possess to cut the meadows he has seeded, and to get thefull benefit of manure he has made and carted. I see how you reason,young sir; but you are behind the age--you are sadly behind the age."
"The age is a queer one, if I am! All over the world it is believed thatlong leases are favors, or advantages, to tenants; and nothing can makeit otherwise, _caeteris paribus_. Then what good will the tax do, afterviolating right and moral justice, if not positive law, to lay it? On ahundred dollars of rent, I should have to pay some fifty-five cents oftaxes, as I am assessed on other things at Ravensnest; and does anybodysuppose I will give up an estate that has passed through fivegenerations of my family, on account of a tribute like that!"
"Mighty well, sir--mighty well, sir! This is fine talk; but I wouldadvise you not to speak of _your_ ancestors at all. Landlords can't name_their_ ancestors with impunity just now."
"I name mine only as showing a reason for a natural regard for mypaternal acres."
"That you might do, if you were a tenant; but not as a landlord. In alandlord it is aristocratic and intolerable pride, and to the lastdegree offensive--as Dogberry says, 'tolerable and not to be endured.'"
"But it is a _fact_, and it is natural one should have some feelingsconnected with it."
"The more it is a fact, the less it will be liked. People associatesocial position with wealth and _estates_, but not with farms; and thelonger one has such things in a family, the worse for them!"
"I do believe, Jack," put in my uncle Ro, "that the rule which prevailsall over the rest of the world is reversed here, and that with us it isthought a family's claim is lessened, and not increased, by time."
"To be sure it is!" answered Dunning, without giving me a chance tospeak. "Do you know that you wrote me a very silly letter once, fromSwitzerland, about a family called De Blonay, that had been seated onthe same rock, in a little castle, some six or eight hundred years, andthe sort of respect and veneration the circumstance awakened! Well, allthat was very foolish, as you will find when you pay your incognitovisit to Ravensnest. I will not anticipate the result of your schooling;but, go to school."
"As the Rensselaers and other great landlords, who have estates ondurable leases, will not be very likely to give them up, except on termsthat will suit themselves, for a tax as insignificant as that mentionedby Hugh," said my uncle, "what does the Legislature anticipate frompassing the law?"
"That its members will be called the friends of the people, and not thefriends of the landlords. Would any man tax his friends, if he couldhelp it?"
"But what will that portion of the people who compose the anti-rentersgain by such a measure?"
"Nothing; and their complaints will be just as loud, and their longingsas active, as ever. Nothing that can have any effect on what they wishwill be accomplished by any legislation in the matter. One committee ofthe Assembly has actually reported, you may remember, that the Statemight assume the lands, and sell them to the tenants, or some one else;or something of the sort."
"The Constitution of the United States must be Hugh's aegis."
"And that alone will protect him, let me tell you. But for that nobleprovision of the Constitution of the Federal Government, his estatewould infallibly go for one-half of its true value. There is no use inmincing things, or in affecting to believe men more honest than theyare--AN INFERNAL FEELING OF SELFISHNESS IS SO MUCH TALKED OF, AND CITED,AND REFERRED TO, ON ALL OCCASIONS, IN THIS COUNTRY, THAT A MAN ALMOSTRENDERS HIMSELF RIDICULOUS WHO APPEARS TO REST ON PRINCIPLE."
"Have you heard what the tenants of Ravensnest aim at, in particular?"
"They want to get Hugh's lands, that's all; nothing more, I can assureyou."
"On what conditions, pray?" demanded I.
"As you 'light of chaps,' to use a saying of their own. Some evenprofess a willingness to pay a fair price."
"But I do not wish to sell for even a fair price. I have no desire topart with property that is endeared to me by family feeling andassociation. I have an expensive house and establishment on my estate,which obtains its principal value from the circumstance that it is soplaced that I can look after my interests with the least inconvenienceto myself. What can I do with the money but buy another estate? and Iprefer this that I have."
"Poh! boy, you can shave notes, you'll recollect," said Uncle Ro, dryly."The calling is decided to be honorable by the highest tribunal; and noman should be above his business."
"You have no right, sir, in a free country," returned the caustic JackDunning, "to prefer one estate to another, more especially when otherpeople want it. Your lands are leased to honest, hard
-working tenants,who can eat their dinners without silver forks, and whose ancestors----"
"Stop!" I cried, laughing; "I bar all ancestry. No man has a right toancestry in a free country, you'll remember!"
"That means landlord ancestry; as for tenant ancestry, one can have apedigree as long as the Maison de Levis. No, sir; every tenant you havehas every right to demand that his sentiment of family feeling should berespected. His father planted that orchard, and he loves the applesbetter than any other apples in the world----"
"And my father procured the grafts, and made him a present of them."
"His grandfather cleared that field, and converted its ashes into potsand pearls----"
"And _my_ grandfather received that year ten shillings of rent, for landoff which his received two hundred and fifty dollars for his ashes."
"His great-grandfather, honest and excellent man--nay, superhonest andconfiding creature--first 'took up' the land when a wilderness, and withhis own hands felled the timber, and sowed the wheat."
"And got his pay twenty-fold for it all, or he would not have been foolenough to do it. I had a great-grandfather, too; and I hope it will notbe considered aristocratic if I venture to hint as much. He--adishonest, pestilent knave, no doubt--leased that very lot for six yearswithout any rent at all, in order that the 'poor confiding creature'might make himself comfortable, before he commenced paying his sixpenceor shilling an acre rent for the remainder of three lives, with a moralcertainty of getting a renewal on the most liberal terms known to a newcountry; and who knew, the whole time, he could buy land in fee, withinten miles of his door, but who thought _this_ a better bargain than_that_."
"Enough of this folly," cried Uncle Ro, joining in the laugh; "we allknow that in our excellent America, he who has the highest claims toanything must affect to have the least, to stifle the monster envy; andbeing of one mind as to principles, let us come to facts. What of thegirls, Jack, and of my honored mother?"
"She, noble heroic woman! she is at Ravensnest at this moment; and asthe girls would not permit her to go alone, they are all with her."
"And did you, Jack Dunning, suffer them to go unattended into a part ofthe country that is in open rebellion?" demanded my uncle,reproachfully.
"Come, come! Hodge Littlepage, this is very sublime as a theory, but notso clear when reduced to practice. I did not go with Mrs. Littlepage andher young fry, for the good and substantial reason that I did not wishto be 'tarred and feathered.'"
"So you leave them to run the risk of being 'tarred and feathered' inyour stead?"
"Say what you will about the cant of freedom that is becoming so commonamong us, and from which we were once so free; say what you will, Ro, ofthe inconsistency of those who raise the cry of 'feudality,' and'aristocracy,' and 'nobility,' at the very moment they are manifesting adesire for exclusive rights and privileges in their own persons; saywhat you will of dishonesty, envy, that prominent American vice,knavery, covetousness, and selfishness, and I will echo all you canutter; but do not say that a woman can be in serious danger among anymaterial body of Americans, even if anti-renters and mock-redskins inthe bargain."
"I believe you are right there, Jack, on reflection. Pardon my warmth;but I have lately been living in the Old World, and in a country inwhich women were not long since carried to the scaffold on account oftheir politics."
"Because they meddled with politics. Your mother is in no seriousdanger, though it needs nerve in a woman to be able to think so. Thereare few women in the State, and fewer of her time of life anywhere, thatwould do what she has done; and I give the girls great credit forsticking by her. Half the young men in town are desperate at the thoughtof three such charming creatures thus exposing themselves to insult.Your mother has only been sued."
"Sued! Whom does she owe, or what can she have done to have brought thisindignity on her?"
"You know, or ought to know, how it is in this country, Littlepage; wemust have a little law, even when most bent on breaking it. A downright,straightforward rascal, who openly sets law at defiance, is a wonder.Then we have a great talk of liberty, when plotting to give it thedeepest stab; and religion even gets to share in no small portion of ourvices. Thus it is that the anti-renters have dragged in the law in aidof their designs. I understand one of the Rensselaers has been sued formoney borrowed in a ferryboat to help him across a river under his owndoor, and for potatoes bought by his wife in the streets of Albany!"
"But neither of the Rensselaers need borrow money to cross the ferry, asthe ferrymen would trust him; and no lady of the Rensselaer family everbought potatoes in the streets of Albany, I'll answer for it."
"You have brought back some knowledge from your travels, I find!" saidJack Dunning, with comic gravity. "Your mother writes me that _she_ hasbeen sued for twenty-seven pairs of shoes furnished her by a shoemakerwhom she never saw, or heard of, until she received the summons!"
"This, then, is one of the species of annoyances that has been adoptedto bully the landlords out of their property?"
"It is; and if the landlords have recourse even to the covenants oftheir leases, solemnly and deliberately made, and as solemnly guaranteedby a fundamental law, the cry is raised of 'aristocracy' and'oppression' by these very men, and echoed by many of the creatures whoget seats in high places among us--or what _would_ be high places, iffilled with men worthy of their trusts."
"I see you do not mince your words, Jack."
"Why should I? Words are all that is left me. I am of no more weight inthe government of this State than that Irishman who let you in just nowwill be five years hence--less, for he will vote to suit a majority; andas I shall vote understandingly, my vote will probably do no one anygood."
Dunning belonged to a school that mingles a good deal of speculative andimpracticable theory with a great deal of sound and just principles; butwho render themselves useless because they will admit of no compromises.He did not belong to the class of American _doctrinaires_, however, orto those who contend--no, not _contend_, for no one does _that_ anylonger in this country, whatever may be his opinion on the subject--butthose who _think_ that political power, as in the last resort, should bethe property of the few, for he was willing New York should have a verybroad constituency. Nevertheless, he was opposed to the universalsuffrage, in its wide extent, that does actually exist; as I supposequite three-fourths of the whole population are opposed to it, in theirhearts, though no political man of influence, now existing, has themoral calibre necessary to take the lead in putting it down. Dunningdeferred to principles, and not to men. He well knew that an infalliblewhole was not to be composed of fallible parts; and while he thoughtmajorities ought to determine many things, that there are rights andprinciples that are superior to even such _unanimity_ as man canmanifest, and much more to their majorities. But Dunning had no selfishviews connected with his political notions, wanting no office, andfeeling no motive to affect that which he neither thought nor wished. Henever had quitted home, or it is highly probable his views of thecomparative abuses of the different systems that prevail in the worldwould have been essentially modified. Those he saw had unavoidably ademocratic source, there being neither monarch nor aristocrat to produceany other; and, under such circumstances, as abuses certainly abound, itis not at all surprising that he sometimes a little distorted facts andmagnified evils.
"And my noble, high-spirited, and venerable mother has actually gone tothe Nest to face the enemy!" exclaimed my uncle, after a thoughtfulpause.
"She has, indeed; and the noble, high-spirited, though not venerable,young ladies have gone with her," returned Mr. Dunning, in his causticway.
"All three, do you mean?"
"Every one of them--Martha, Henrietta, and Anne."
"I am surprised that the last should have done so. Anne Marston is sucha meek, quiet, peace-loving person, that I should think _she_ would havepreferred remaining, as she naturally might have done, without excitingremark, with her own mother."
"She has not, neve
rtheless. Mrs. Littlepage _would_ brave theanti-renters, and the three maidens _would_ be her companions. I daresay, Ro, you know how it is with the gentle sex, when they make up theirminds?"
"My girls are all good girls, and have given me very little trouble,"answered my uncle, complacently.
"Yes, I dare say that may be true. You have only been absent from homefive years this trip."
"An attentive guardian, notwithstanding, since I left you as asubstitute. Has my mother written to you since her arrival among thehosts of the Philistines?"
"She has, indeed, Littlepage," answered Dunning, gravely; "I have heardfrom her three times, for she writes to urge my not appearing on theestate. I did intend to pay her a visit; but she tells me that it mightlead to a violent scene, and can do no good. As the rents will not bedue until autumn, and Master Hugh is now of age, and was to be here tolook after his own affairs, I have seen no motive for incurring the riskof the tarring and feathering. We American lawyers, young gentleman,wear no wigs."
"Does my mother write herself, or employ another?" inquired my uncle,with interest.
"She honors me with her own hand. Your mother writes much better thanyou do yourself, Roger."
"That is owing to her once having carried chain, as she would sayherself. Has Martha written to you?"
"Of course. Sweet little Patty and I are bosom friends, as you know."
"And does she say anything of the Indian and the negro?"
"Jaaf and Susquesus? To be sure she does. Both are living still, andboth are well. I saw them myself, and even ate of their venison, solately as last winter."
"Those old fellows must have each lived a great deal more than hiscentury, Jack. They were with my grandfather in the old French war, asactive, useful men--older than _my_ grandfather!"
"Ay! a nigger or a redskin, before all others, for holding on to life,when they have been temperate. Let me see--that expedition ofAbercrombie's was about eighty years since; why, these fellows must bewell turned of their hundred, though Jaap is rather the oldest, judgingfrom appearances."
"I believe no one knows the age of either. A hundred each has beenthought now for many years. Susquesus was surprisingly active, too, whenI last saw him--like a healthy man of eighty."
"He has failed of late, though he actually shot a deer, as I told you,last winter. Both the old fellows stray down to the Nest, Martha writesme; and the Indian is highly scandalized at the miserable imitations ofhis race that are now abroad. I have even heard that he and Yop haveactually contemplated taking the field against them. Seneca Newcome istheir especial aversion."
"How is Opportunity?" I inquired. "Does she take any part in thismovement?"
"A decided one, I hear. She is anti-rent, while she wishes to keep ongood terms with her landlord; and that is endeavoring to serve God andMammon. She is not the first, however, by a thousand, that wears twofaces in this business."
"Hugh has a deep admiration of Opportunity," observed my uncle, "and youhad needs be tender in your strictures. The modern Seneca, I take it, isdead against us?"
"Seneky wishes to go to the legislature, and of course he is on the sideof votes. Then his brother is a tenant at the mill, and naturally wishesto be the landlord. He is also interested in the land himself. One thinghas struck me in this controversy as highly worthy of notice; and it isthe _naivete_ with which men reconcile the obvious longing ofcovetousness with what they are pleased to fancy the principles ofliberty! When a man has worked a farm a certain number of years, heboldly sets up the doctrine that the fact itself gives him a high moralclaim to possess it forever. A moment's examination will expose thefallacy by which these sophists apply the flattering unction to theirsouls. They work their farms under a lease, and in virtue of itscovenants. Now, in a moral sense, all that time can do in such a case,is to render these covenants the more sacred, and consequently morebinding; but these worthies, whose morality is all on one side, imaginethat these time-honored covenants give them a right to fly from theirown conditions during their existence, and to raise pretensions farexceeding anything they themselves confer, the moment they cease."
"Poh, poh! Jack; there is no need of refining at all, to come at themerits of such a question. This is a civilized country, or it is not. Ifit be a civilized country, it will respect the rights of property, andits own laws; and if the reverse, it will not respect them. As forsetting up the doctrine, at this late day, when millions and millionsare invested in this particular species of property, that the leaseholdtenure is opposed to the _spirit_ of institutions of which it hassubstantially formed a part, ever since those institutions havethemselves had an existence, it requires a bold front, and more capacitythan any man at Albany possesses, to make the doctrines go down. Men mayrun off with the notion that the _tendencies_ to certain abuses, whichmark every system, form their spirit; but this is a fallacy that a verylittle thought will correct. Is it true that proposals have actuallybeen made, by these pretenders to liberty, to appoint commissioners toact as arbitrators between the landlords and tenants, and to decidepoints that no one has any right to raise?"
"True as Holy Writ; and a regular 'Star Chamber' tribunal it would be!It is wonderful, after all, how extremes do meet!"
"That is as certain as the return of the sun after night. But let us nowtalk of our project, Jack, and of the means of getting among theseself-deluded men--deluded by their own covetousness--without beingdiscovered; for I am determined to see them, and to judge of theirmotives and conduct for myself."
"Take care of the tar-barrel, and of the pillow-case of feathers,Roger!"
"I shall endeavor so to do."
We then discussed the matter before us at length and leisurely. I shallnot relate all that was said, as it would be going over the same groundtwice, but refer the reader to the regular narrative. At the usual hour,we retired to our beds, retaining the name of Davidson, as convenientand prudent. Next day Mr. John Dunning busied himself in our behalf, andmade himself exceedingly useful to us. In his character of an oldbachelor, he had many acquaintances at the theatre; and through hisfriends of the greenroom he supplied each of us with a wig. Both myuncle and myself spoke German reasonably well, and our original plan wasto travel in the character of immigrant trinket and essence pedlers. ButI had a fancy for a hand-organ and a monkey; and it was finally agreedthat Mr. Hugh Roger Littlepage, senior, was to undertake this adventurewith a box of cheap watches and gilded trinkets; while Mr. Hugh RogerLittlepage, junior, was to commence his travels at home, in thecharacter of a music-grinder. Modesty will not permit me to say all Imight, in favor of my own skill in music in general; but I sang well foran amateur, and played both on the violin and flute, far better than iscommon.
Everything was arranged in the course of the following day, our wigs ofthemselves completely effecting all the disguises that were necessary.As for my uncle, he was nearly bald, and a wig was no great encumbrance;but my shaggy locks gave me some trouble. A little clipping, however,answered the turn; and I had a hearty laugh at myself, in costume, thatafternoon, before Dunning's dressing-room glass. We got round the felonylaw, about being armed and disguised, by carrying no weapons but ourtools in the way of trade.