“Uh.” He pinched her nipple, and her eyes wanted to close, but his face was right above hers just then, and the sight of his eyes so lit by emotion halted that. She managed to form quiet words to answer him, but her body screamed for more from him. “I learned as a child. My mother is from Ulta. My accent would have been different than his, but my mother’s maid is also an Ultan; she speaks it just like the man out there.”
Ulta was a ’Verse at the far end of the Imperium. Known for its hot springs, vast oceans and floating cities, it wasn’t often visited by anyone, much less outsiders from the Federation. It was then she remembered what she’d been thinking earlier before they’d arrived.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you by bringing up your family.” He pulled back, and she sighed. “What is it?”
“Nothing. It’s nothing.” She reached for him, but he moved away to look at her better.
“Nothing? Really?”
“It’s nothing!” she insisted.
“Fine.” He sat up, angering her in the process. He’d been closed up and moody, but that was fine. She wasn’t allowed?
“You know, withholding sex is supposed to be what women do.”
He narrowed his eyes at her for a brief time. “That so? You’re an expert on what women do and sex now?”
“After spending time with infuriating bastards, I should be an expert on that.”
He rolled off the bed, and she made a face at his back. “Excuse my intrusion into your life. I’ll endeavor not to do it again.”
Digging through his bag, he grabbed a book and began to read it. Insufferable! The man was actually pouting because she wouldn’t tell him all the details of why she was upset?
“I never said that,” she attempted to explain. He finally glanced up at her, and guilt seeped into her gut at the look on his face. Like a stranger. He’d taken her places she’d never imagined, done it with hands and mouth and cock. He knew her in ways no one else ever had or ever would. He’d made her feel valuable, loved. Seeing that blank expression cut to the core. “Don’t look at me like that! You’re not being fair. I let you have your space to tell me or not about things.”
Horror coiled at the escape of a small sob.
“I apologize,” he murmured, setting the book aside, moving to her. “I just hate seeing you upset. I thought maybe I could help in some way. I’m not trying to pry.” He took a deep breath. “So, yes, I suppose I am. But I just want to know so I can fix it.”
“You can’t fix this.” She shrugged, and despite all her best intentions, tears came. “I’m so humiliated,” she said, voice thick with emotion.
He moved to her again, pulling her into his arms and up into his lap. “Sweet, please tell me what it is. Even if I can’t fix it totally, share it with me so I can take some of the weight.”
She swallowed hard at the emotion welling up within. “I’m afraid I’m making the wrong choice. People will be hurt, and I’m the cause.”
She rushed the telling, not sure if she told it slowly if it would all release from her conscience.
He listened, and she waited, growing more nervous with each passing moment of silence.
Finally, he said, “Whatever you did, people would have died. That’s an unassailable fact, is it not?”
“Maybe. I don’t know.”
“Really? You don’t know? You’re far more intelligent and politically savvy than that, sweet.” He waited, and she sighed.
“I thought you wanted to fix it.”
Startled, he laughed and kissed her. “You can’t have it both ways. If you had stayed quiet, what could you have done? You’d have been kept a virtual prisoner. You and I both know he wouldn’t have allowed you to teach children. And whatever else you have, do you truly believe your father would have used it for good?” He kept his voice low, but she heard it just fine.
“No matter what you did, people would have suffered. They will. I can’t erase that. I can’t make it not true, no matter how I wish I could. It’s all balance. Even working for good, even the right choice will hurt people.”
She caressed his cheek. So silly, she’d been so silly not to see that if anyone could understand her feelings, it would be this man who made such choices every day. How it must wear on him at times: the responsibility, the awareness that no matter what he did, people would be hurt, and so he had to make the choice that hurt less people.
“You do it every day.”
“Not really. Don’t make more of it than it is.” He tried to move his head away, to hide his face, but she held on.
“Pfft. Officially, that’s my response. For the record, and don’t let this feed your ridiculous ego, but you did fix it.” She put her fingers over his lips to keep him from responding. “Oh, shush, you! You are hells-bent on ruining this moment of supreme femininity, and I’m not having that. You fixed it because you reminded me that nothing is simple and that’s why what you do is important. The average person could not bear the weight of such a thing, and you do. You helped me with a small piece of that by being an example. So there.” She moved her fingers quick enough to kiss him before he could argue.
Chapter 12
After the chaos of getting settled in, the main part of the trip was fairly calm. They had dropped their things in their cabins and had disembarked in quick order. Since she’d been tired and slightly miffed at him for his annoyance back in the clearing, she’d been quieter than usual, and of course she wouldn’t consent to staying in the room while he procured food for them. Not even if Andrei stayed with her. Damnable woman.
So they’d hunted down the small cantina run for passengers and had managed to locate a table and some decent enough food.
He hid his grin as she tried to explain to Andrei why he should eat more than just huge hunks of meat. The people around them in the small cantina went about their business, but Daniel was smart enough to know some watched him, watched and wondered who they were. More a hallmark of a grifter than anything serious. Yet. Criminals always looked for ways to make credits, so he was always careful to be unmemorable. Which was difficult just then, because no matter what her hair color was, no matter what she wore or pretended to be, she was outrageously beautiful and vibrant.
She was also smart, canny. She worked her way through the transport, smiling and nodding, taking in bits and pieces and relaying it all to him in her way. Which wasn’t always direct, and sometimes it took him a few beats to understand her point. But he got it, and her eye was excellent.
Not that he’d admit it out loud, but her quirkiness, the way she could be so hard and smart one moment and silly the next, pleased him. The one thing about her that was constant was her heart. She cared about people, and in that way, he was reminded a lot of his sisters, of his brother. They’d like her, he realized, knowing he’d have to introduce her to them because Abbie wouldn’t have it any other way and because he wanted to share Carina with them, show them he was capable of something more than his job.
What that meant really he didn’t know. But he knew he wanted her tomorrow and the day after. Knew he wanted to see what they might have once they got to Ravena, if they had anything at all.
Andrei broke out a deck of playing cards, and she actually clapped. “I haven’t played games in a very long time. How fun.”
“Keep an eye on Ander; he’s vicious.” Daniel sat back and sipped his ale, watching the two of them interact.
Andrei lit a cigarette, drawing in deep the fragrant smoke. Despite the circumstances being so tense, it was a good moment there at the table, a decent enough meal, drinking ale, watching his friends play cards. Lovely to see Carina smile, lovely to see her getting used to life with some freedom in it.
“When I was a child, my mother was bedridden a lot, so she played cards with us when she had good days.” Andrei discarded cards, Carina gasped and then growled as she had to take the pile. Daniel wisely hid his grin.
“Hmpf.” Carina mused as she looked at the cards she held, dropping two.
“Are you close to her still?”
“She was murdered when I was in lockup. My younger brother was taken by the authorities, and I never saw him again. My oldest sister did her best to raise us, but she was only barely older than I was. She married young, has several kids of her own now.”
“I’m sorry.” She said it without pity, which meant Andrei heard it, took it to heart and nodded.
“That’s life for a lot of kids.” He shrugged.
“Doesn’t make it right. Your father?”
“Loser.”
She laughed without humor. “We have that in common.”
Andrei snorted and went back to his cards.
She was as vicious as Andrei at games of chance. Daniel wasn’t that surprised. A woman like her had to be serious and vicious if need be. It was sexy.
Her gaze slid from the cards to Daniel’s face, and he smiled. She blushed prettily, so he figured she got the message. Need throbbed like his pulse. He wanted her, wanted his hands, mouth and cock on her, in her.
“I’m tired. I think I might go to sleep early.” She stood.
“Good idea.” Daniel stood as well, and Andrei sent him a raised brow.
The three of them walked back through the now quieting transport toward the cabins. People watched, most of them because it was natural to look when others passed, some because they liked the way one of the three looked and some had suspicion and calculation in their eyes.
At Andrei’s door, Andrei looked to Daniel. “I saw it, too. I’ll keep a watch on that.” Meaning the calculated gazes they’d met on the way back.
Daniel nodded once and thanked Andrei, and they went into their own rooms, locking themselves in.
“What is he watching?” she murmured into his ear as she slid into his arms.
“People.”
“What will you teach me today?” She looked up at him through her lashes, and he took a deep breath. She had no real idea what she did to him. Oh, sure, she understood her feminine appeal; it was impossible for her not to. But this was more. She got under his skin in a way he’d never imagined anyone doing. She had become integral to him, and the immensity of that scared him silly.
“To sleep, because when you push a man who’s got pent-up energy, you might get something more vigorous than you expect,” he murmured, meaning it. He wanted her. Badly. And he wasn’t sure he could hold back all the intensity he felt just then.
“I want that. Show me. Make me feel what you do.” She took a step back and pulled the sweater she wore over her head. “I’m right here giving myself to you. Take me.”
He groaned, lost to reason, only wanting more of her skin showing, wanting to touch.
“Show me.” He leaned back against the wall, trying for patience. “Show me what you like.”
“How?” She wasn’t nervous, just interested. He enjoyed that about her.
“Take your clothes off and touch yourself. I want to see you, want to know what you like.”
“You do what I like.”
He grinned. “I like to hope so, yes. But life is a learning process. Help me learn more about how to give you pleasure.”
“If you’re trying to scare me, it won’t work.” She tossed the rest of her clothes to the side, putting her weapons near the bed where she could reach them if necessary. He liked that, too.
He dimmed the lights in the room and placed a chair within reach of where she’d settled on the bed. Totally naked, her skin flushed with excitement and a bit of embarrassment, he wagered.
She slid her hands up her belly to her breasts, flicking her thumbs back and forth across her nipples until her hips started to churn. The air seemed to still as it warmed, her scent built as she became more and more aroused. His pulse hammered in his head.
One hand left her breasts and moved back to her pussy. His mouth watered as she parted her labia and dipped her fingers inside that glistening space. The sound she made jerked his attention sharply until his focus narrowed and narrowed. Her body, her hands, the way he struggled to breathe was all he knew.
Finally she sighed and turned to him. “Nothing I do feels better than what you do to me.”
But he was up before she’d finished her sentence, need raw on his face, and she lay there, looking up as he stripped off his weapons and moved them to a neat pile near the bed. Fully naked and erect, he turned quickly to be sure his alarms were on and then moved to her with purpose.
“Torture. Beautiful torture watching you touch these,” he said around a nipple.
Ha! Torture? He was so very handsome and commanding, and the sex just sort of oozed from him and he was tortured?
“I’m glad I wasn’t alone then. You torture me just by existing. You’re just so much, it’s hard to take in sometimes.”
He began to move down, kissing her belly, but she yanked on his hair when he wouldn’t stop at her request. “Hey, no. I want you in me. Now.”
“I want you to be ready.”
“Ready? Are you making a joke? I’m so wet I can feel it on my thighs. I’m ready for you right now, so put it in me!”
“I’ve clearly created a monster.” He smirked down at her as he teased his cock around her gate.
“I’m going to kill you and hide your body if you don’t hurry up.” She tried to squirm to take him deeper.
“I’m not going to be able to fill your request if you keep at me. I’m going to start laughing.”
“You need to laugh more. After you fuck me.”
He laughed then, and the breath whooshed out of her as he thrust into her in one movement. His laughter died as his eyes slid halfway closed and he stilled.
“You’re bossy,” he grunted.
“You’re controlling.”
He managed a good shrug. “I am.”
She burst out laughing. “You make me happy. Despite all this insanity, you make me happy.”
“I want everything, sweet. Give it to me.” He stared into her eyes and began to move. He’d taken her wildly and sweetly; this was intense on a different level. He demanded everything of her in those minutes they spent in bed. The look on his face brooked no stifled gasps: he wanted to hear it all, he wanted arching and moaning, he wanted her to experience every last breath of the pleasure he gave her. And he wanted to see it.
So she gave it to him, jumped off the edge of her self-control and let loose. Let the maelstrom of this desire between them suck her under, trusting him to keep her from losing herself entirely.
Her nails dug into his hips as she urged him closer. He adjusted her thighs and calves, opening her up. She rolled her hips, demanding more. His muscles flexed and relaxed, the sheen of exertion seeming to make him glow. The scent of him, sexually aroused male at work, made her giddy, drunk with his masculinity.
When he leaned down to kiss her, the wiry hair on his chest abraded her nipples, bringing a gasp he eagerly swallowed. Skin to skin, rubbing against each other, intertwined legs and arms, she felt it all, gave it back to him as he never tore his gaze from her face.
And then he pulled out, bringing her right up against him as she tried to hold him in place. “What?”
He pushed her back and descended on her pussy with his mouth, bringing her so much intense pleasure she yelled out with it, pressing herself to him unashamedly as he ate her, licked, sucked, rubbed against every bit of her until she nearly sobbed to come.
That’s when he sucked her clit, in and out, in and out, and she tripped into an orgasm so hard and deep she was sure she’d never felt anything so exquisitely pleasurable. She barely even registered it when he rolled her over and put a pillow under her hips. And then his cock was back, pressing deep, firing up another wave of pleasure, prolonging her climax.
“Gods, so fucking tight and wet. You’re the most perfect thing in creation,” he said into her neck as he began to thrust harder and faster. The heat of him blanketed her back.
She managed to get her ass higher, up to her knees, her nails dug into the blankets until with a gutt
ural groan of her name, he came.
When he rolled off, he kissed her hip and then the small of her back.
“I like it that way,” she said, meaning from behind. “Now I can sleep.” She grinned and turned over to look at him better.
He shook his head as he got out of bed to clean up. “I’ve been told I’m better than warm milk.”
“I’m quite certain I don’t want to know who said that. In any case, I certainly have more fun with you than I ever did with a mug of warm milk,” she said as he got back in bed. She snuggled against him before getting up to clean up and get dressed herself. Being naked with Daniel was one of her favorite things, but it was too cold for that just then.
“What’s your mother like?”
“She runs a bakery. She’s a nice woman, a good woman who loves her children and has terrible taste in men.”
She got back in with him, pulling the blankets up and gluing herself to his body. “Four children, that’s a big group.”
“We’re all pretty good. I knew . . . well, we all stuck together and tried to keep things calm.”
She pressed her head into him until he finally turned over so she could see his face when he spoke. “I had a dog once who did that. Butted me with his gargantuan head until I paid attention to him.” He raised one brow at her.
“Are you saying I have a gargantuan head?”
He heaved a sigh, and she couldn’t hold back her laughter. “I’m sorry, you’re just so very fun to tweak. Now, back to our topic. You started to say something else. You knew. You knew what?”
He dragged a breath into his lungs. “She was fragile for a large part of my early childhood. Sick a lot. She has an immune disorder that she can treat, but the heat and dryness of the outback sapped most everything from her. She was just worn down.”
His voice was quiet, filled with emotion, and she hugged him tighter.
“I knew she had enough to deal with in my father, who was, is a giant, selfish, cheating prick. I just never wanted to be the reason she looked sad, I guess. So Abbie and I, that’s one of my sisters, we just sort of kept everything running. We didn’t really have much of a chance to get into trouble.”