There... I've managed to succinctly voice my greatest fear.
Emily lays a reassuring hand on my shoulder. "Here's the thing, Rowan... I really don't know for sure. No one can. All you can do is go into it with your eyes wide open and work hard to build the relationship. And it is work. Trust me on that."
I don't say anything at first, mentally digesting this tidbit. Of course, it was a little too late to worry about it now. The dam had been broken and there was no undoing what we did last night. I'll have those memories to keep me hot and bothered for the rest of my life.
And I know every minute that I spend with Flynn... every touch he gives me, I'll fall in deeper.
Flynn and I are walking to our rooms. The resort is huge, encompassing almost two-hundred acres of rolling hills covered with tropical trees and plants. A narrow cement path crosses and winds along the hills, sometimes bringing you out in a clearing that overlooks one of the seven private beaches. Every time I see the crystal blue waters and bleached white sand, I'm a bit dumbstruck because it's beyond anything I've ever imagined.
We reach our building, which houses just eight rooms that sits ten yards from a small beach tucked into a cove. We were told this tiny bay houses a sea turtle population that we can snorkel among, and I want to do that while we're here but I first need to find out about the likelihood of sharks. I'm terrified of them.
Flynn leads me up a staircase to the second floor. There's no elevator because this resort frowns upon modern conveniences. The rooms have electricity but past that, not much else. There is no air conditioning except lazy fans that twirl overhead, no TVs, no Wi-Fi, and no telephones. It's truly designed to get away from it all.
When we reach Room 210, Flynn inserts the antique metal key into the door and opens it. He motions me inside and follows.
"They'll be bringing our bags up in about half an hour," he says as he steps up behind me, laying his hands on my shoulders.
I lean back into him. "Is my room next door?"
"Nope. I canceled your room. We're bunking together, roomie." He punctuates the statement by laying a warm kiss at the base of my neck, right where it meets my shoulder.
I let out a soft whimper at his touch and curl my arm backward to wrap around his head. "Is that so?"
"Yeah... and I figure we have half an hour to fool around before the bags get here." His hand snakes down to the hem of the dress I decided to wear for the trip and pulls it up. His knuckles trail along my outer thigh as the dress moves higher.
I push backward into him and I'm not surprised by how hard he is already. The thought that just the thought of having sex with me turns him on, completely turns me on. Which as jumbled as those thoughts are, actually makes complete sense to me.
"Tell me you have a condom concealed on you somewhere," I say, reaching behind me and feeling him through his shorts.
Nuzzling under my jaw, Flynn chuckles and pushes into my hand. "I've got it covered."
I giggle. "No pun intended, right?"
Flynn slips his hand into the front of my underwear, smoothly dragging a finger between my legs. My hips have no will and push back against him.
"Let's make this fast," he says. "I'm betting we can go twice before the bags get here."
The thought causes me to tremble, and I know I certainly have the ability to get two quick orgasms in because Flynn proved that to me last night. I wonder if he can do the same.
"Let's do this," I say, my breathing starting to become shallow the more he moves his fingers against me. My body feels wired tight with the anticipation of him fucking me fast.
Flynn's hand comes out of my panties and he pushes me toward the bed. His words are hurried... urgent. "Get your underwear off and get on all fours while I suit up. Oh, and keep touching yourself. I'm not going to last long and I want you with me, okay?"
His words are simple orders but damn if they don't have me groaning at the way he has things mapped out. I don't waste any time and shimmy out of my panties. I hike my dress up around my waist and jump on the bed, presenting my ass to him. As he commanded, my hand goes between my legs and I start working at myself. When I glance back over my shoulder, Flynn has his shorts unbuttoned and he's rolling the condom over his massive length. My mouth goes dry at the thought of him pushing into me and my hand moves faster.
He glances up and looks at me, eyes then traveling over my ass, my pelvis thrusting gently against my hand. I even let out a moan so he knows how turned on I am. Flynn holds himself in his hand and he closes his eyes for just a moment, taking a deep breath. He looks like he's trying to get himself under control but that's the last thing I want.
"Flynn," I say softly.
His eyes snap open and lock onto me.
"I'm waiting," I tell him.
Groaning, he steps to the edge of the bed and climbs on behind me. His hands come up to my hips and he holds me gently, flexing his pelvis forward and rubbing his dick between my legs, brushing up against my own fingers, which are still rubbing hard. Flynn smoothes one of his hands across my ass, and drags his finger down between my cheeks. The move is decidedly erotic and I gasp and flinch forward when his finger skims across my anus.
"You're sensitive," he teases. "I like that."
His finger ventures forth and he slips it inside of me. "God Rowan... you're all ready for me."
"Always," I breathe as he adds another finger, stretching me for him.
While Flynn said he wanted to go fast, he seems to content to play with my body, pumping his fingers in and out... rubbing and pushing... causing me to groan from the contact.
Finally, I have to remind him, "I thought we were going to do this fast."
He removes his hand from between my legs, pushing himself to my opening. He is on target and he enters me with one smooth stroke, pulling a groan from each of us.
"Fuck, Rowan," he says between clenched teeth. "Fuck, fuck, fuck that feels good."
I answer by pulling myself off him and pushing back, and his moan in response has me smiling.
Then it's on.
Flynn sets a hard, fast pace while he grips tight to my hips. Sweat drips from his chest onto my back, soaking through my dress, and his thighs slap against mine. He's hitting me deep... so very deep, and I can feel an orgasm building fast. I try to hold it off, so I can wait for him, but I don't know if I have that much willpower. I want to succumb too greatly.
"Rowan," Flynn says in almost a pained voice. "I'm not going to last... I can't hold it. If you're not with me, baby, I swear I'll take care of you after."
I suppress my giggle that Flynn is so turned on, he has no control, and my heart melts that he's still thinking of me... always thinking of me. Those words alone cause my body to start spasming. "Too late, Flynn... I'm coming."
Flynn gives one super hard thrust, practically knocking me onto my stomach, and then he groans, "I'm coming, too."
His fingers dig into my ass, and I'm sure I'll have ten little bruises showing for all the world to see when I wear my bathing suit.
Oh, well. So worth it.
Flynn makes a few more pumps into me and then collapses onto my back, pushing me into the mattress. I turn my head to the side at the last second to prevent getting smothered by the pillows, but then Flynn immediately rolls off me.
We are both gasping for breath. I turn my head to look at him. He's lying on his back, staring at the ceiling with a silly smile in full bloom. He reaches a hand out and glides it over my naked butt.
Turning his head to face me he says, "You wreck me."
"You wreck me, too," I whisper.
The Caldwell and Burnham clans make quite the entrance to Parrot's, the outdoor beach bar that sits just off the main building. Steel drum music beats low and the sun is dipped halfway into the water, throwing orange and pink sparkles everywhere.
Flynn holds my hand the entire time, and introduces me to everyone. Sometimes he moves his hand to my back, lightly rubbing through the cotton material of my dress. My mind
keeps flitting back to the carnality we just enjoyed in our room, and I want nothing more than to abandon these people and figure out what other dirty things Flynn can do to me.
But we must socialize first.
First up is Emily's brother, Ryan, and his wife, Danny, along with their six-month-old daughter, Amelia. They're both gracious, saying they had heard all about me from Emily. I'm not sure what to make of that, but I'll have to assume she said good things.
Danny is interesting. She's one of those people that you just have an instant connection with. While both Ryan and Danny give me a warm hug upon introduction, when Danny wraps her arms around me, I feel an instant trust with her. It's freakin' weird and I'm really looking forward to getting to know her to find out why that is. About the only other person I've ever felt that way before was with Flynn, and even then, I was distrustful. I suppose maybe opening myself up to Flynn, and seeing that not everyone is out to hurt me, is opening me up to other people.
I'm completely intimidated by meeting Emily and Ryan's parents. Flynn has filled me in on them, and apparently, I'm meeting an honest to God U.S. Congressman and his wife. To make matters worse, apparently Congressman Burnham... who insists I call him Alex--yeah right--is thinking about running for President, and that thought alone has my hands breaking out into a slimy sweat. Which is completely awkward when he holds his hand out to me to shake. Still, they seems nice enough and then I watch as Celia Burnham practically wrestles her grand-daughter away from Danny, who laughs as she gives her up, only to step into her husband's embrace and lay her head on his massive chest.
Yup... Ryan Burnham is a hottie.
Next up is Flynn's cousin, Linc, and his girlfriend, Ever. Again, no doubt that Linc and Flynn are related, and they could easily pass as brothers... which puts him in the smokin' hot category. Ever is ethereally beautiful with the loveliest and widest blue eyes I've ever seen on a human. It's like she knows everything about you.
Linc and Flynn are the closest in age of the Caldwell clan and are very close. Flynn talks to Linc by phone or text almost as much as Renner, and he has the NHL package at the apartment so he watches as many of Linc's games as he can. He also watches the Rangers and Ryan, but he pulls for the Coyotes now that Linc is playing there. I'm still a die-hard Rangers fan though and that's not going to change.
As we're talking to Linc and Ever, we hear a scream from behind us and Flynn whips around, his entire face lighting up in a smile. A red-haired woman across the bar has her eyes locked with Flynn's, and then she's running to him. She jumps up and he catches her soundly as she wraps her arms and legs around him. He hugs her tight and it only took the flame hair for me to know this was Renner.
Walking up behind her with a smirk is a holy mother of God hottie that I can only guess is Cillian. He's the only one thumbing his nose at the tropics as he wears a pair of black jeans, a black t-shirt with his band's logo, and a chain hanging from his back pocket, extended over to clip to a front belt loop. He has two shiny, silver hoops stuck in his bottom lip and yeah... he's a panty dropper.
So this is the lead singer of Over The Edge? Flynn introduced me to their music not long after I moved in, and we play it quite frequently around the apartment, although I doubt Flynn would ever admit that to Cillian. It seems they didn't get off to the greatest of starts.
Flynn releases Renner and I watch as Cillian extends his hand to Flynn, who doesn't hesitate and shakes it. But they quickly release and then Flynn pulls Renner in for another hug. While he does so, Cillian turns to me.
"You must be Rowan. I'm Cillian." He holds his hand out and I shake it.
"Nice to meet you," I say quietly, again a bit overwhelmed with the amount of famousness I've been meeting today. Hmmmm... let's see... a Congressman, two NHL players, and an Irish rock star. Yeah, nothing unusual about this day.
Flynn releases Renner again and pulls me to his side. "Ren... this is Rowan."
Renner grabs me and pulls me into a hug so swiftly, I almost get whiplash. She babbles in my ear. "I'm so glad to meet you. Flynn talks about you all the time. I almost made Cillian bring me to the States last month so I could get a gander at the girl that has my big bro all worked up."
I blush over those words but I'm secretly pleased as well. It's one thing to know that Flynn has feelings for me, because I see it in his eyes... the way he talks to me, and now the way he touches me so intimately. But it's a completely different thing for me to know that Flynn shares his feelings about me with others. It humbles me, and yeah... scares me just a little because I'm starting to understand that Flynn may have already gone off the deep end where I'm concerned.
Me? I feel like I've stepped over the edge, but lashed out and grabbed ahold of a rocky ledge, with my toes just dangling in the water... afraid to let go and take the plunge. I wonder if I'll ever really trust and just do it... just let go?
Pulling back, I smile at Renner. Before I can even respond, she's grabbing me and pulling me to the bar. "Come on, girlfriend. Let's drink something coconutty and bond."
I glance back at Flynn and he's laughing at me, his eyes warm and full of something so powerful, it makes me swallow hard. It exhilarates and frightens me, and I have to wonder which emotion I'll ultimately let overtake me.
"Wanna go swimming again?" I ask Rowan, glancing over at her as she lies beside me on the warm beach.
She's stretched out on her stomach, her cheek resting on her hands, with her eyes closed. She looks so peaceful and it's a look that I'm so glad can lay naturally on her face.
We've been out here all morning, soaking up the sun and just chillin' with each other. Nix and Emily had to go into St. Thomas to get their marriage license, and Renner and Cillian decided to tag along. I have no clue where all the parents are, but for now, I'm enjoying some alone time with Rowan.
After renting some snorkeling gear, we swam out in the small lagoon and tried to find some sea turtles. No such luck but we did swim over some really pretty reefs, teaming with colorful fish. I tried to talk Rowan into some scuba diving but she was having none of it. She muttered something about "shark bait" and "not enough money in the world". I didn't have the heart to tell her sharks could swim into this lagoon but I'd never get her back out in the water if I did that.
Rowan sits up and I can't help but notice the way her breasts sway underneath her tiny bikini top. She didn't own a bathing suit so yesterday afternoon, she bought one in the resort's gift shop. I tried to talk her into a sedate one-piece because, frankly, I don't like the idea of her assets hanging out for everyone to see. Those are for my eyes only. She merely threw it back at me and grabbed the tiny pile of dental floss that she's now wearing. I have to admit, though, the turquoise blue material looks beautiful against her skin and it makes me want to peel her out of it.
In fact, I'm thinking maybe we should take a beach break and hit the room for a while. I'm now obsessed with getting that bikini off her. I lean over and rub my nose along her neck. She sighs and brings her fingers up to glide through my hair. She tilts her head and brings her lips against mine. I press the advantage and slip my tongue in, deepening the kiss.
"Hey you two, get a room."
Cursing, I pull back from Rowan, who wipes at her lips with the tips of her fingers and smiles. Glancing over my shoulder, I see Linc headed our way. He's wearing a pair of board shorts and a New York Rangers t-shirt.
"Isn't it sacrilege or something for you to wear that shirt?"
Linc looks down at his chest, no doubt not even conscious of what clothes he threw on. Shrugging his shoulders, he says, "Hope I don't get struck by lightning."
He takes the towel in his hand and unfurls it, laying it in the sand next to mine. He plops his butt down with a sigh.
Glancing over his shoulder back toward the building where our rooms are housed, he looks back to me. "Okay... I need your advice before Ever gets down here." Linc glances at Rowan. "You're a woman! I could use your advice too."
"Thanks for noticing," Rowan
says dryly.
Linc's mouth turns upward and he wiggles his eyebrows at her. "Oh, I noticed all right."
A low growl emits from my throat. "Hey... eyes back on me, buddy, or I'll introduce your face to my fist."
Linc lets out a chuckle and I smile at him, but I'm dead serious. If he looked at Rowan's perfect body a second longer, we'd have gone at it. "So, what's up?"
He glances one more time over his shoulder and then leans in toward us conspiratorially. "Okay... so I'm going to pop the big question to Ever the night after the wedding. I talked to the resort manager, and he's going to arrange for us to have a private dinner on the beach. He's going to set up a small table, candles... they even have this canopy that is like nothing but some bamboo poles stuck in the sand with some filmy material or some shit like that that goes over the top. So Rowan... do you think that sounds romantic?"
I glance at Rowan, because I am curious as to what she considers romantic. She gives him a wry smile and holds her hand to her chest, "My heart just went pitter-patter when you said 'some shit like that', Linc. Very romantic."
A bark of laughter escapes my mouth and Linc punches me in the shoulder. "Dude, not funny. Seriously, what do you two think? Because I really wanted to do something huge and over the top. Let her know how much I love her... you know, sort of like what Ryan did for Danny."
Rowan looks puzzled so I take a minute and explain how Ryan proposed to Danny on the big Jumbotron at Madison Square Garden before a Rangers game. She's dutifully impressed and a fleeting thought goes through my mind... I wonder what type of proposal it would take to get Rowan to agree to marriage. I have no clue what her views are, but I know her ideas of parenthood are skewed based on her family experience.
Turning to Linc, I tell him, "Look man... I don't really know Ever all that well, so I can't say for sure what she'd like. But I do know you. And you're the low-key, subtly romantic type of dude. You're not an over-the-top, in-your-face, shout-to-the-world-my-feelings kind of guy. So I think this beach dinner sounds perfect. What I do know about Ever is that she loves you... just the way you are. So she'd much rather have something that reflects the real you."