CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE.
Kate's conductress had stopped at a door on the first floor, above whichan old portrait hung, so that when the woman held the candle which shecarried above the level of her head, the bodily and mentally weary girlfelt that two people were peering cautiously at her, and she gladlyentered the old-fashioned, handsomely-furnished room, and stood by thenewly-lit fire, which, with the candles lit on the chimney-piece anddressing-table, gave it a cheerful welcoming aspect.
She could not have explained why, but the aspect of the woman wouldsuggest dead leaves, and the saddened plaintive tone of her voicebrought up the sighing of the wind in the windows of the old house atNorthwood.
"I took some of the knobs of coal off, miss, for Becky always will puton too much," said the woman plaintively, as she took her formerattitude, holding the candle on high, and gazed at the new-comer. "Ialways say to her that when she gets married and pays for coals herselfshe'll know what they cost, though I don't know who'd marry her, I'msure. I'll put 'em back if you like."
"There will be plenty of fire--none was needed," said Kate, wearily. "Ionly want to rest."
"Of course you do, miss," said the woman, still watching her, with facewrinkled and eyes half closed. "And you needn't be afraid of the bed.Everything's as dry as a bone. Becky and me slep' in it two nights ago.We sleep in a different bed every night so as to keep 'em all aired, asmaster's very particular about the damp."
"Thank you; I am sure you have done what is necessary," said Kate, whoin her low nervous state was troubled by the woman's persistentinquiring stare.
"Is there anything I can do for you, miss?"
"Thank you, no. I am very tired, and will try and sleep."
"Because I can soon get you a cup of tea, miss."
"Not now, thank you. In the morning. I will not trouble you now."
"It's to-morrow morning a'ready, my dear, and nothing's a trouble tome," said the woman, despondently, "'cept Becky."
"Thank you very much, but please leave me now."
"Yes, miss, of course. There's the bells: one rings upstairs and theother down, so it will be safest to ring 'em both, for it's a bighouse--yes," she continued, thoughtfully, "a very big house, and there'sno knowing where Becky and me may be."
"Ah," sighed Kate, as at last she was relieved from the pertinaciouscurious stare, for the door had closed; but as she sank wearily in alounge chair the housekeeper seemed photographed upon her brain, and onemoment she was staring at her with candle held above her head, the nextit was the face of the handsome woman above the door, peeringinquiringly down as if wondering to see her there.
The candles burned brightly and the fire crackled and blazed, and thenthere was a peculiar roaring sound as of the train rushing along throughthe black night; the room grew darker, and shrank in its proportionstill it was the gloomy first-class carriage, with the oil washing to andfro in the thick glass bubble lamp, while John Garstang sat back in thecorner, and Kate started up, to shake her head and stare about herwonderingly, as she mentally asked herself where she was, and shiveredas she recognised the fire, and the candles upon the mantelpiece.
She glanced round at the turned-down bed, looking inviting beneath thethick dark hangings, and felt that it would be better to lie down andrest, but thought that she would first fasten the door.
She rose, after waiting for a few moments to let her head get clearer,and walked on over the soft carpet toward the dark door, which kept onreceding as she went, while the power seemed to be given her to seethrough it as if it were some strange transparency. Away beyond it wasJohn Garstang, waving her on towards him, always keeping the samedistance off, till it grew darker and darker, and then lighter, for thefire was blazing up and the wood was crackling, as there was the soundof a poker being placed back in the fender; and there, as she opened hereyes widely, stood the woman with the chamber candlestick held highabove her head, gazing at her in the former inquiring way.
"It is a part of a nightmare-like dream," said Kate to herself; "my headis confused with trouble and want of rest;" and as in a troubled way shelay back in the chair, she fully expected to see the face of the womangive place to that over the door, and then to John Garstang movingslowly on and on and beckoning her to come away from Northwood ManorHouse, where her aunt and uncle were trying to hurry her off to thechurch, where Claud was waiting, and Doctor Leigh and his sister stoodin deep mourning, gazing at her with reproachful eyes.
As her thoughts ran in that way she mentally pictured everything with avividness that was most strange, and she was rapidly gliding back intoinsensibility when the woman spoke, and she started back, with her headquite clear, while a strange feeling of irritability and anger made herfeatures contract.
"Awake, miss?" said the woman, plaintively.
"Yes, yes; why did you come back? I will ring when I want you--bothbells."
"There was the fire, miss; I couldn't let that go out I was obliged tocome every hour, and I left it too long now, and had to start it with abundle of wood."
Kate sat up and stared back at her, then round the room, to see that thecandles were burning--four--on mantelpiece and dressing-table.
"Didn't hear me set the fresh ones up, miss, did you?" said the woman,noticing the direction of her eyes. "T'others only burned till twelve."
"Burned till twelve--come every hour? Why, what time is it?"
"Just struck three, miss. Breakfast will be ready as soon as you are;but you'd ha' been a deal better if you'd gone to bed. I did put you aclean night-dress, and it was beautifully aired. Becky held it beforethe kitchen fire ever so long, for it only wanted poking together andburned up well."
"I--I don't understand," faltered Kate. "Three o'clock?"
"Yes, miss; and as black as pitch outside. Reg'lar London fog, butmaster's gone out in it all the same. He said he'd be back to dinner,and you wasn't to be disturbed on no account, for all you wanted wasplenty of sleep."
"Then I have been thoroughly asleep?"
"Yes, miss; about ten hours I should say; but you'd have been a dealbetter if you'd gone to bed. It do rest the spine of your back so."
Kate rose to her feet, staggered slightly, and caught at the chair back,but the giddy sensation passed off, and she walked to the window.
"Can't see nothing out at the back, miss," said the woman, shaking herhead, sadly. "Old master hated the tiles and chimney-pots, and haddouble windows made inside--all of painted glass, but you couldn't seenothing if they weren't there. It's black as night, and the fog comescreeping in at every crack. What would you like me to do for you,miss?"
"Nothing, thank you."
"Then I'll go and see about the breakfast, miss. I s'pose you won't belong?"
Kate drew a deep breath of relief once more, and trying to fight off theterrible sensation of depression and strangeness which troubled her, shehurried to the toilet table, which was well furnished, and in abouthalf-an-hour went out on to the broad staircase, which was lit with gas,and glanced round at the pictures, cabinets, and statues with which itwas furnished. Then, turning to descend, she was conscious of the factthat she was not alone, for, dimly seen, there was a strange,ghastly-looking head, tied up with a broad white handkerchief, peeringround the doorway of another room, but as soon as its owner found thatshe had attracted attention she drew back out of sight, and Kateshuddered slightly, for the face was wild and strange in the half-light.
The staircase looked broader and better as she descended to the roominto which she had been taken on her arrival, and found that it was welllit, and a cheerful fire blazing; but she had hardly had time to glanceround when the woman appeared at the door.
"Breakfast's quite ready, miss," she said. "Will you please to comethis way?"
She led the way across the hall, but paused and turned back to a door,and pushed it a little way open.
"Big lib'ry, miss. Little lib'ry's upstairs at the back-two rooms.There's a good fire here. Like to see it now?"
"No, not now."
"This way then, miss," and the woman threw open a door on the otherside.
"Dining-room, miss. There ain't no drawing-room; but master said thismorning that if you wished he'd have the big front room turned into one.I put your breakfast close to the fire, for it's a bit chilly to-day."
Kate thought she might as well have said "to-night," as she glancedround the formal but richly furnished room, with its bright brassfireplace, and breakfast spread on a small table, and looking attractiveand good.
"I made you tea, miss, because I thought you'd like it better; but I'llsoon have some coffee ready if you prefer it. Best tea, master'swonderfully particular about having things good."
"I prefer tea," said Kate, quietly, as she took her place, feeling moreand more how strange and unreal everything appeared.
And now the magnitude of the step she had taken began to obtrude itself,mingled with a wearying iteration of thoughts of Northwood, and whatmust have been going on since the morning when her flight was firstdiscovered. Her uncle's anger would, she knew, be terrible! Then hercousin! She could not help picturing his rage when he found that shehad escaped him. What would her aunt and the servants think of herconduct? And then it was that there was a burning sensation in hercheeks, as her thoughts turned to Leigh and his sister, the only peoplethat during her stay at Northwood she had learned to esteem.
And somehow the burning in her cheeks increased till the tears rose toher eyes, when, as if the heat was quenched, she turned pale with miseryand despair, for she felt how strongly that she had left behind in JennyLeigh one for whom she had almost unknowingly conceived a genuinesisterly affection.
From that moment the struggle she had been having to seem calm, and athome, intensified, and she pushed away cup and saucer and rose from thetable, just as the housekeeper, who had been in and out several times,reentered.
"But you haven't done, miss?" she said, plaintively.
"Yes, thank you; I am not very well this morning," said Kate, hastily.
"As anyone could see, miss, with half an eye; but there's somethingwrong, of course."
"Something--wrong?" faltered Kate.
"Yes, miss," said the woman in an ill-used tone. "The tea wasn't strongenough, or the sole wasn't done to your liking."
"Don't think that, Mrs--Mrs--"
"Plant's my name, miss--Sarah Plant, and Becky's Becky. Don't call meMrs., please; I'm only the servant."
"Well, do not think that, Sarah Plant. Everything has been particularlynice, only I have no appetite this morning--I mean, to-day."
"You do mean that, miss?"
"Of course I do."
"Thank you kindly, miss. I did try very hard, for master was so veryparticular about it. He always is particular, almost as Mr Jenour was;but this morning he was extra, and poor, dear, old master was neveranything like it. Then if you please, miss, I'll send Becky to clearaway, and perhaps you'd like to go round and see your new house. I hopeyou will find everything to your satisfaction."
"My new house?"
"Yes, miss; master said it was yours, and that we were to look upon youas mistress and do everything you wished, just as if you were hisdaughter come to keep house for him. This way please, miss."
Kate was ready to say that she wished to sit down and write, for herheart was full of self-reproach, and she longed to pour out her feelingsto her old confidential maid; but the thought that it would be betterperhaps to fall in with Garstang's wishes and assume the position he hadarranged for her to occupy, made her acquiesce and follow thehousekeeper out of the room.
The woman touched a bell-handle in the hall, and then drew back alittle, with a show of respect, as her eyes, still eagerly, and full ofcompassion, scanned the new mistress she had been told to obey.
"Will you go first, ma'am?"
"No: be good enough to show me what it is necessary for me to see."
"Oh, master said I was to show you everything you liked, miss--I mean,ma'am. It's a dreadfully dark day to show you, but I've got the gas liteverywhere, and it does warm the house nicely and keep out the damp."
Kate longed to ask the woman a few questions, but she shrank fromspeaking, and followed her pretty well all over the place until shestopped on the first floor landing before a heavy curtain whichapparently veiled a window.
"I hope you find everything to your satisfaction, ma'am--that the househas been properly kept."
"Everything I have seen shows the greatest care," said Kate.
"Thank you, ma'am," said the woman, and her next words aroused hercompanion's attention at once, for the desire within her was strong toknow more of her new guardian's private life, though it would have been,she felt, impossible to question. "You see, master is here so veryseldom that there is no encouragement for one to spend much time incleaning and dusting, and oh, the times it has come to me like a wickedtemptation to leave things till to-morrow; but I resisted, for I knewthat if I did once, Becky would be sure to twice. You see, master ismostly at his other house when he isn't at his offices, where he justhas snacks and lunches brought in on trays; but it's all going to bedifferent now, he tells me, and the house is to be kept up properly, andvery glad I am, for it has been like wilful waste for such a beautifulplace never hardly to be used, and never a lady in it in my time."
"Then Mrs Garstang did not reside here?"
"Oh, no, ma'am! nor old master's lady neither--not in my time."
"Mr Garstang's father?"
"Oh, no, ma'am: Mr Jenour, who had it before master, and--and diedhere--I mean there," said the woman, in a whisper, and she jerked herhead toward the heavy curtain. "It was Mr Jenour's place, and hecollected all the books and china and foreign curiosities. I'll tellyou all about it some day, ma'am."
"Thank you," said Kate, quietly. "I will go down to the library now; Iwish to write."
"There's pen, ink and paper in there, ma'am," said the woman, jerkingher head sideways; "and you can see the little lib'ry at the same time."
"I would rather leave that till another time."
"Hah!" came in a deep low sigh, as if of relief, and Kate turned quicklyround in surprise, just catching sight of the face with the handkerchiefbound round it that she had seen before.
It was drawn back into one of the rooms instantly, and Kate turned herquestioning eyes directly upon the housekeeper.
"It's only Becky, ma'am--my gal. She's been following us about to peepat you all the time. I did keep shaking my head at her, but she wouldcome."
"Is she unwell--face-ache?" asked Kate.
"Well, no, ma'am, not now. She did have it very bad a year ago, but itgot better, and she will keep tied up still for fear it should comeback. She says it would drive her mad if it did; and if I make herleave off she does nothing but mope and cry, so I let her keep on.She's a poor nervous sort of girl, and she has never been right sinceshe lost the milkman."
"Lost the milkman?" said Kate, wonderingly.
"He went and married someone else, ma am, as had money to set him up inbusiness. Females has a deal to put up with in this life, as well Iknow. Then you won't go and see the little lib'ry to-day, ma'am?"
"No, not to-day," said Kate, with an involuntary shiver which made thewoman look at her curiously, and the deep sigh of relief came again fromthe neighbouring room.
"Cold, ma'am?"
"Yes--no. A little nervous and upset with travelling," said Kate; andshe went down at once to the library, took a chair at the old-fashionedmorocco-covered table, glanced round at the well-filled bookcases, andthe solid rich air of comfort, with the glowing fire and softenedgaslight brightening the place, and taking paper stamped with theaddress she began to write rapidly, explaining everything to her oldmaid, pleading the urgency of her position for excuse in leaving as shehad, and begging that "dear old nurse" would join her at once.
She paused from time to time to look round, for the silence of the placeoppressed her; and in her nervous anxious state, suffering as she wasfrom
the feeling that she had done wrong, there were moments when shecould hardly refrain from tears.
But she finished her long, affectionate letter and directed it, turninground to sit gazing into the fire for a few minutes, hesitating as towhether she should do something that was in her mind.
There seemed to be no reason why she should not write to Jennie Leigh,but at the same time there was a something undefined and strange whichheld her back from communication; but at last decision had its way, andfeeling firmer, she turned to the table once more and began to writeanother letter.
"Why should I have hesitated?" she said, softly; "I'm sure she likes mevery much, and she will think it so very strange if I do not write."But somehow there was a slight deepening of tint in her cheeks, and afaint sensation of glow as she wrote on, her letter being unconsciouslycouched in very affectionate terms; while when she had concluded andread it over she found that she had been far more explanatory than shehad intended, entering fully into her feelings, and the horror and shameshe had felt on discovering the way in which her cousin had been thrownwith her, detailing his behaviour; and finally, in full, the scene inwhich Mr Garstang had protected her and spoken out, to the unveiling ofthe family plans.
"Pray don't think that I have acted foolishly, dear Jenny," she said ina postscript. "It may seem unmaidenly and strange, but I was driven toact as I did. I dared not stay; and beside being in some way arelative, Mr Garstang is so fatherly and kind that I have felt quitesafe and at rest. Pray write to me soon. I shall be so glad to hear,for I fear that I shall be rather lonely; and tell your brother howgrateful I am to him for his attention to me. I am much better andstronger now, thanks to him."
The glow in her cheeks was a little deeper here, and she paused with theintention of re-writing the letter and omitting all allusion to DoctorLeigh, but she felt that it would seem ungrateful to one to whose skillshe owed so much; and in spite of a sensation of nervous shrinking, thedesire to let him see she was grateful was very strong.
So the letter was finished and directed.
But still she hesitated, and twice over her hand was stretched out totake and destroy the missive, while her brain grew troubled andconfused.
"I can't think," she said to herself at last with a sigh; "my brainseems weary and confused;" and then she started from her chair in alarm,for Garstang was standing in the room, the thick curtains and softcarpet having deadened his approach; and in fact, he had been there justwithin the heavy portiere watching her for some minutes.