Miriam couldn’t bear it. “They’re insane if they think we’ll get up in front of hundreds of people and talk about how we feel! I won’t do it.”
Miriam didn’t say it, but there was another reason she didn’t want to step into the gym.
She’d found Holly there.
Ruth pleaded, but Miriam held her ground. Someone jostled her. Another kid bumped her from behind.
“You’re blocking the way,” someone complained.
Ruth grabbed Miriam’s arm and dragged her out of traffic. “You can’t just stand here,” she whispered. “What are you going to do?”
“I don’t know,” Miriam replied. “Just go, Ruth. Leave me alone, okay? I really need to be alone.”
Ruth’s gaze softened and she shrugged. “Okay. But don’t get caught. You don’t need detention right now.”
Miriam nodded. “Thanks, Ruth.”
Ruth slipped back into the crowd and disappeared.
Miriam pictured Holly on the gym floor, her bloated face and purple neck, the trickle of blood down her cheek.
Was this what the counselors wanted her to discuss? Her memories of a strangled corpse?
A sour taste rose in her throat. Suddenly Miriam felt truly sick. Clamping one hand over her mouth, she raced against the tide of students and pushed her way into the bathroom.
She tossed her books into a sink, then dropped to her knees in front of the first toilet. Her breath came in hitches. Visions of Holly flew in her head—Holly fighting off her attacker. Holly choking. Holly dying. Miriam wanted more than anything to get it all out.
But nothing happened.
Miriam’s breathing returned to normal. A cold sweat coated her upper lip.
She felt shaky but better.
She took several deep breaths, then slowly rose to her feet.
Her books had landed haphazardly in the sink. She stacked them neatly on a ledge and turned on the faucet. Then she splashed the cold water onto her face.
She pulled a long strip of paper towel out of the dispenser and dried her cheeks, wiping away the salty grit that never seemed to leave her eyes since Holly’s death.
She stared into the mirror.
What’s happening to me? she asked herself.
She had been so happy. She had had Jed. She had had Holly and Ruth. Friends who loved her—who she loved in return.
All slipping away.
Miriam shivered. It was so cold in this bathroom. The porcelain of the sink felt frozen.
Felt dead.
She heard a sound.
A slow creaking sound that made her flesh crawl.
The bathroom door slowly opened, its hinges squeaking.
Miriam turned.
Mei and Noah stood in the doorway.
chapter 17
“Mei?” Miriam croaked. She held on to the cold sink. Her legs suddenly felt shaky and weak.
Mei and Noah entered the bathroom, letting the door close behind them. They looked as if they hadn’t slept in a week.
What were they going to do?
“Miriam, we need to talk,” Mei said. She held her hand out as if to calm Miriam down. “I have to know what you told the police.”
“I told them the truth,” Miriam replied, trying to steady her voice. Her eyes darted from Mei to Noah.
Mei’s lip quivered and she turned to Noah. He put his arm around her and glared at Miriam.
“Do you have any idea what you’ve done?” Noah exploded.
Miriam blinked in confusion. Mei and Noah certainly weren’t acting as if they wanted to kill her. Or even frighten her.
What was going on?
Mei narrowed her eyes at Miriam. “You told them lies, Miriam! Complete lies!” She clenched her fists and stepped forward. “I loved my mother! I would never kill her!”
Miriam pressed herself against the sink behind her.
“How did you know I went to the police?” she asked Mei.
“Because they made us come in for questioning. They kept Noah there for four hours last night!”
Miriam turned to Noah, but he didn’t reply. He stared coldly at her.
“How could you do this, Miriam?” Mei yelled. “I thought we were friends. How could you spread such lies?”
All the blood left Miriam’s face. Her head swam. She didn’t dare say anything.
A frightening thought crept into her head: The whole school was in the gym. No one knew where she was. No one would hear her screams.
“Mei …” she began.
“Don’t,” Mei interrupted. “I know why you went to the police. You think we did it. You think we killed Holly, too.”
Mei shook her head in disgust. “I can’t believe Holly sucked you into all of this. My mother fell down the stairs by accident, Miriam. She sprained her ankle last week, and it gave out again on the top of the stairs. Do you hear me? It was an accident.”
Miriam tried to clear her head. She listened hard to what Mei told her. Took it in. Thought about it.
And still didn’t believe it.
Mei and Noah were murderers. She was sure of it.
They were trying to get her off their trail. That was the only explanation.
“I don’t believe you,” Miriam declared.
“I’m telling the truth! I swear on my mother’s soul! You know how close we were!” Mei screeched. “Don’t believe all the garbage Holly put in your head. Think!”
Miriam shook her head. “Holly heard you plotting it. She heard you after the basketball game. She heard Noah say he’d do whatever it took.”
“Yeah,” Noah snarled. “The cops ran that one by me a few times last night. Haven’t you ever said that you wanted to kill your parents, Miriam?”
Miriam squirmed. She had made that very same argument with Holly.
And now Holly is dead, she thought angrily.
“I’ve said it lots of times,” Miriam replied defiantly. “But I never did it.”
Noah’s face darkened. Mei shook her head in disbelief.
“What will it take to convince you?” Noah asked. “You’re the only one left who truly knows Mei. You know her. You know she’s innocent. You know someone else killed Holly.”
“Who?” Miriam yelled.
Noah shrugged. “Who knows? All I know is that it wasn’t us. That’s all I care about.”
“I care about Holly!” Miriam wailed. “She was my best friend!”
“So was I, once,” Mei said. “Why can’t you believe me now? Holly had a big mouth, Miriam. She didn’t care who she hurt. A lot of people probably wanted to kill her. But we didn’t. You have to believe me.”
Miriam stared deep into Mei’s eyes. Memories came rushing back—she and Mei at football games, dances, going to the movies together …
They had been best friends.
Until Noah.
Miriam turned to study him. She could never trust those eyes. Who knows what Noah could convince Mei to do? she thought. Who knows what Noah could do on his own?
Mei touched Noah’s arm. “Come on,” she murmured. “She doesn’t believe us.”
Noah pulled Mei close and gave her a short hug. His eyes never left Miriam. Then they turned to go, arm-in-arm.
What do you believe? Miriam asked herself.
“Mei?” she called timidly.
Mei turned, gazing hopefully at her.
“I want to believe you,” Miriam whispered. “I know how you were before, Mei. Back then you wouldn’t hurt a fly. But now …” Miriam gestured at Noah. “I don’t know.”
Mei’s face hardened. “I would kill for Noah!” she cried. “Don’t say a word about Noah!”
Miriam gasped. “You would kill?”
Mei smiled. “I would,” she repeated. “But I didn’t.”
Miriam saw a smirk cross Noah’s face as he took Mei’s hand and led her away. He kept his eyes on Miriam the whole way to the door.
Miriam felt sick again. Noah’s eyes were dead, expressionless.
She didn’t care
what Mei said, or how convincing she was. Noah Brennan was a dangerous person. Miriam couldn’t forget those eyes.
The eyes of a maniac.
The eyes of a killer.
They walked away from me now, Miriam thought.
But will they come back?
chapter 18
Miriam had never been so happy to see the end of a school day. The final bell had rung. The halls were silent.
She stayed after to make up a history quiz. Now she grabbed what books she needed and closed her locker, finally ready to head out. She tried not to think of Holly’s locker next to hers.
She walked down the main hall toward the student parking lot. Her mother had let her drive to school today, probably out of sympathy. Miriam didn’t care why. It was nice to have a car to herself.
As she passed the hallway that led to the boys’ locker room, she heard Jed’s voice.
Jed’s angry voice.
“Get out of my face, man,” he growled.
Miriam whirled and saw him. He and Gary were nose to nose by the water fountain.
Miriam ducked behind the corner and watched, making sure no one saw her. The halls were empty.
“No way!” Gary yelled. “I will be in your face as long as it takes, Jed. I’m not carrying this around with me forever. You’re going to slip up somewhere, and I’ll blow the whistle.”
“No, you won’t,” Jed taunted him. “You don’t have the guts.”
“Watch me,” Gary shot back. “I know everything Holly knew. She was always right about you.”
Jed’s face twisted. “You always have to bring her up, don’t you? Get over it! She’s dead!”
Gary backed off a few steps, clearly shocked that Jed would say such a thing.
Miriam bit her lip. What was going on?
“I’m warning you, man,” Jed said. “Don’t mess with me. Just forget everything you know.”
“You don’t scare me,” Gary sneered.
Jed raised a warning finger. “Forget everything, Gary.”
Gary muttered a curse and disappeared into the locker room.
Jed started walking toward Miriam. She backed away from the corner, her heart racing.
What did Gary know about Jed? What was going on with him?
Miriam backtracked down the hall to make it look as if she were coming from her locker. She didn’t want him to know she’d been eavesdropping. Holly would be proud, she thought grimly.
Jed rounded the corner and stalked away from her, toward the doors to the parking lot. Miriam hurried to catch up.
“Jed?”
He turned violently, his eyes flashing. When he saw her, he relaxed a bit. “Hey,” he said curtly.
Miriam approached, hugging her books to her chest, trying to be brave. She had to be calm, try to find out what was going on.
“How are you?” he asked.
“I’m … I’ll be okay,” she managed. “I’m getting better.”
“That’s good.” He nodded absently. “Real good.”
A tense moment passed.
“Uh, Jed—”
“Look, I—”
They both stopped.
“Go ahead,” he urged.
“No,” she replied. “Please. You first.”
“I … I just wanted to apologize for last night. I know I’m apologizing almost every day for something. But I wanted you to know I was truly sorry for the things I said. Holly was your best friend, and I guess I let my own feelings get in the way of that.”
Miriam nodded. “And?”
Jed seemed puzzled. “That’s it. And I was hoping you would come to the game tonight. It’s against Reed Valley. If we win, we make the finals. And Coach Hurly said that this is the one I have to nail. There will be a half-dozen scouts watching.” He smiled. “This is the big one.”
Again, Miriam only nodded. Then she said: “I’m going to give you one last chance, Jed. And I want the straightest answer you’ve ever given in your life. What is going on with you?”
His jaw tightened. His fingers flexed on the strap of his gym bag.
“Well?” Miriam demanded.
“Miriam, if I blow this tonight, I’m through. No basketball, no scholarship, no college at all. Can’t you understand that?”
“There’s more, Jed!”
“What else could there possibly be? I swear I’m telling you the truth! What more do you want from me?”
Miriam leaned toward him. “What are you hiding?”
“What?”
“You’re hiding something, Jed. Holly called me the night she was killed to tell me something she found out about you. What is it?”
Jed tossed up his arms. “How should I know? I don’t even know what you’re talking about!”
“Yes, you do!”
“Look, Miriam, I’m sick of talking about Holly! I don’t care what she told you. Holly’s dead, and you still want to know her gossip! Get over it.”
Miriam took a step back. Jed was getting violent again. Why wouldn’t he tell her what Holly had found out?
Then it hit her.
Holly knew something about Jed.
Something bad enough to upset Gary.
Jed had been at school the night Holly died. Alone.
He showed up right after I found Holly.
Was he somehow involved with her death?
Was he responsible for her death?
Miriam stared at Jed, studying his face.
She had to ask. She had to ask it again.
“What were you doing at school the night Holly was killed?”
chapter 19
“What are you, a cop?” Jed snapped. “I told you. I was in the weight room. Lifting.”
“Wasn’t it a little late for lifting?”
“Whoa. Wait a minute.” Jed’s eyes narrowed. “You think I killed Holly?”
Miriam stared him in the eye. He was obviously furious, but she wouldn’t back down this time. She had to know the truth.
“If it’s not that, then tell me what it is, Jed. Tell me!”
“Gary and I had a late session because of so much time between playoff games!” he told her. “We didn’t want to lose our edge! If you don’t believe me, go into the locker room and ask Gary. Go. Go! Ask him!”
Miriam hesitated. Had she gone too far?
“Something is going on with you, Jed,” she stated. “And I’ll find out what.”
Jed gave a dry, humorless laugh. “I can’t take this anymore, Miriam. I’m done.”
He backed away from Miriam, shaking his head. “If you think I killed Holly, fine. I’m a murderer,” he continued. “Well, this murderer is going home to get ready for his big game. This murderer is going to score forty points tonight and get a full ride to Georgetown. Okay? See you later.”
He bolted for the doors.
“Jed!”
He ignored her.
“Jed!”
The crack in her voice stopped him. He stood still for a moment, then finally turned. His eyes no longer held rage, only exhaustion.
Miriam’s hands were shaking. Her whole body shook. She thought maybe she was truly losing her sanity.
But she had to make a decision.
She did not believe Jed was a murderer. Did not believe he was capable of that much violence. He was acting strangely about Holly now. But he had always been friends with her before. He couldn’t have killed her.
Jed did not kill Holly, Miriam told herself.
“Come on, Miriam,” Jed said impatiently. “I’ve got to go.”
The words wouldn’t come. “Oh, Jed … I’m …”
He nodded curtly. “I know you are.”
“Sorry.”
“I know.”
“I’ll be at the game tonight,” she promised.
“Thanks,” he replied. “So will I.”
“Please come to the game with me, Ruth,” Miriam begged. “I can’t handle being there alone.”
Ruth shook her head violently. “There is no way I’
m going anywhere that Mei and Noah can see me,” she declared. “And if you were smart, you’d stay away from them, too.”
Frustrated, Miriam flopped back on Ruth’s bed, watching as Ruth fiddled with the water bottle in her hamsters’ cage.
Miriam had gone to her friend’s house on the way home from school. She needed Ruth’s level-headed advice on how to deal with Jed.
But Ruth didn’t seem very level-headed today.
Ruth seemed terrified.
Ever since Miriam had told her about seeing Mei and Noah in the bathroom, Ruth had been acting like a frightened child. She had gone home directly after school, and she refused to leave the house for the basketball game.
“Gary is going to need all his friends for support, Ruth,” Miriam insisted. “This game will be really hard for him. You know how wrecked he is by Holly’s death.”
“I know. But think how wrecked he’d be if you and I were murdered, too,” Ruth replied. She placed the mesh top back on the hamster cage and turned to Miriam. Her expression was serious.
“I think you should tell the police that Mei and Noah threatened you today, Miriam.”
Miriam thought about Noah and Mei in the bathroom. She pictured Noah’s eyes. So cold.
So menacing.
But Noah hadn’t really threatened her.
“I don’t know, Ruth,” she said thoughtfully. “I got the feeling that Mei was telling the truth. I mean, I did know her really well once. I could probably tell if she was lying.”
Ruth’s eyes narrowed. “I can’t believe you!” she cried. “If Mei and Noah didn’t kill Holly, who did? Why would anyone else want to kill her besides them? Who do you think sent us that bloody notebook?”
“But I think Mei was telling the truth,” Miriam insisted. “I think she believes her mother’s death was an accident.”
“Maybe she does believe that,” Ruth agreed. “Maybe that’s what Noah wants her to think. I bet he’s the one who killed her mother—and Holly.”
Miriam shrugged. She couldn’t stand to think about Holly any more. She dragged herself off Ruth’s bed.
“I promised Jed I’d go to the game,” Miriam told her friend. “If you’re not coming, I’d better go on home and get ready.”
Ruth turned back to the hamster cage. She sure loves those two hamsters, Miriam thought. I can’t believe she hurries home to them after school.