Page 7 of (Mis)Trust


  "I had no idea Tyler was such a stupid asshole," Mike says making me laugh again.

  Jesus, I've been crying and laughing back and forth since yesterday. It's like I'm completely incapable of holding on to just one emotion right now I'm so confused and hurt by all this.

  "It keeps getting worse," I mumble. "After it all went down yesterday, I needed Kyle's notes after the exam lecture I missed so he met up with me at school and I broke down in front of him. He was very nice and kind to me and we went back to his place and-" When Mike stiffens against me I'm shocked. "Nothing happened. God, Mike, do you really think anything would've?"

  "No... It's just you know, vulnerable woman, payback, revenge fucking. Whatever," he shrugs. "But no, I know you're not like that. Sorry," he says rubbing my arm a little.

  "Anyway... at some point I described her, he said he didn't know who she was, then we went back to his place and studied our asses off before I slept alone on his couch. This morning we went to our exam, he thanked me for helping him pass, and then he asked me to check in with him to let him know I was okay after seeing Tyler this afternoon. Then Tyler told me about her and I was so hurt again that Kyle kept that from me, or maybe I was mortified that I cried and vented to him and he could tell her everything I said and felt, or... I don't know. I just feel so shocked and betrayed by everyone I thought I knew right now."

  "I'm still me," he almost pleads pulling me tighter to his side.

  "I know. You and Selena are the only 2 people I feel like I can trust right now," I admit sadly.

  "Not to be an asshole," Mike says after a minute of silence between us, "but I can't believe he cheated on you. And with her," he grimaces with such disgust in his voice I love him even more. "And I can't believe you caught them. No wonder you were so off when you arrived today."

  "Yeah, I've been a little messed up since yesterday. I'm just so hurt I don't know what to do, or even what to think anymore."

  "Of course you're hurt. That was a shitty thing for anyone to go through, especially when you were writing the exam of your life at the same time," he says angrily.

  "I probably should've called in but I need to be distracted with work instead of crying in my car. Then that asshole groped me and I just freaked."

  Pulling me in tighter, Mike leans his chin on my head until I calm. "Don't worry about him. You had every right to call him out, and you did it beautifully. Fuck, you could've hit him and it would've been appropriate for what he did to you. Look, before I came in here a few of the guys asked if you were okay and even apologized again asking me to pass it along. If anything comes of this though, I'll tell Hershal exactly what happened."

  Listening to Mike, I feel much better. Hershal, the owner is a kind old man, but he's a little old school. He doesn't like aggressive women, but he also doesn't like anyone 'getting fresh with his girls' as he calls all of us, which though fairly sexiest is also kind of sweet, too. I wasn't worried too much about Hershal, I’m just nervous about my job overall.

  "I need this job, Mike. I'm even going to tell everyone that I'll take extra Friday and Saturday shifts if some of the staff want nights off. I need the hours and I need the weekend tips now more than ever."

  "Who's keeping your apartment?" Mike asks quietly, like it won't hurt me as much if his voice is soft.

  "I assume Tyler will try though there's no way he can afford it without me," I sigh again before I suddenly yawn. Feeling the weight of everything sinking into my bones, I swear I can't even drive tonight I'm so tired.

  "What can I do to help? What do you need?"

  "Don't tell anyone what's going on. I'll talk to Selena in the morning, but I'm pretty embarrassed by all this."

  Lifting up from the couch to look down at me, Mike shakes his head. "You have nothing to be embarrassed about. Tyler should be shot and Kaitlyn just proved what we all knew about her. You're amazing, Saige. And I guarantee Tyler's going to figure that out very soon and come crawling back begging like a pathetic loser."

  "I'll never take him back though. Cheating was the only rule I ever had between us and he did it anyway."

  Smiling at me, Mike kisses my forehead before rising. "I'm glad to hear that because he honestly doesn't deserve you. You are way too good for Tyler, which he just proved. I'm so sorry, but I have to go back out there," he says looking conflicted until I shoo him away with my hand. "Take your time if you want. You're covered, and I don't think you should have to deal with any more dickheads tonight," he grins.

  "Thank you," I hide behind another yawn.

  "Why don't you lie down for a bit? You look exhausted. But I'll come get you when everyone's ready to close up."

  "I will. Thanks," I smile kindly to Mike when he leaves me again in my sad silence.

  5 minutes later I realize I'll never sleep or relax here. My mind seems to turn over everything much more vividly when I'm alone, and I need to finish my night before I have a total breakdown in the motel after work.

  Checking my face, I tidy it up and add a little makeup to hide the dark circles under my eyes. Wiping away the mascara I smeared crying, I powder my red nose and cheeks, add a little lipstick, and fix my ponytail.

  Opening the door, I pull my shit together and start for the bar/lounge area and Mike. Acknowledging Mike who stops drying glasses to look over at me, I nod I'm fine. "I'll never relax, so I figure I should just finish up tonight."

  "You're sure?"

  "I'm okay," I grin when he gives me a skeptical face. "Okay enough to finish anyway."

  Walking back to the men, I notice they all stop speaking immediately when I approach. Ignoring their silence and stares though, I pretend I'm fine.

  "How is everything? Would anyone like another drink?" I ask to 3 of them nodding they would. The rest decline drinks but let me know everything is good.

  Smiling once, I walk to the bar before anything happens for me, or really to me again. At this point I can't trust my emotions anymore and I'm not risking another public meltdown tonight.

  *****

  Waiting out another 15 minutes, I notice all the men finished so I stroll over for the customary would you like coffee or dessert, but they all decline. Grabbing 3 finished plates, I walk back to the computer to print off their bills, grabbing the debit machine as I turn.

  Looking over at the table, the 7 men are still seated which I appreciate and actually need right now. I'm feeling fairly vulnerable and I don't want 7 men standing over me or too close to me when I cash them out.

  "Hi again," I continue to the end of the table I started with. "I hope you enjoyed your meals?" I ask prompting most of them to nod and a few to actually speak out loud they did while I lean far behind them and place their bills on the table beside them.

  Leaning away as much as possible, I keep my face pleasant, but I know my body language tells them I'm trying to avoid getting physically close to them as well.

  "Does anyone need the debit machine?" I ask to all of them nodding, so I start back at the first man.

  Entering his amount, I wait silently behind him to the side as he cashes out. Once approved, I move on to each man in turn. None of them are speaking to me, but they're all polite when I hand over the debit machine pausing in their conversations to cash out.

  One by one, I eventually notice I'm not getting any tips added to their totals. The fifth man confirms it again when I'm handed back the debit and pull his receipt, and by the 6th man I'm starting to feel very sad and teary-eyed again. I guess they really didn't appreciate me telling off their handsy friend.

  When I'm finished, a few of them stand so I step back, suck it up, and thank them for joining us this evening.

  Turning, the middle handsome man calls my name just as I'm about to walk away. "Saige? This is for you- to help with your studies, and to apologize once again for Keith's behavior earlier." Leaning toward me, he hands me a piece of paper wrapped around some money I can see along the edge.

  "If we didn't know he was drunk before we came in we would
've killed him for his horrendous behavior with you. He was very drunk though, and he doesn't normally act like that, but I promise we'll definitely mention what a dickhead he was when he’s sober tomorrow," he smirks at me as I fight smiling back.

  "Thank you," I nod. "I hope you all have a wonderful evening."

  Walking back to the bar, I hold my makeshift envelope and watch them leave together, grabbing a mint or toothpick at the receiving desk, laughing and talking among themselves.

  Carrying away another 3 dirty plates, I stop at the bar for a rag when Mike leans into me. "So?" He asks pointing at my money.

  "I hope it's worth dealing with their friend," I grin pulling out the bills. "Holy shit," I mumble counting twenties and fifties. "Um..." Jesus Christ! "There's $400 dollars here. What- "

  "Fifty bucks a guy?" Mike blurts out as I stare for a moment before moving quickly.

  Rounding the bar, I run through the family side and just make it to the main doors when I see a taxi pulling away. Throwing open the doors, I see 4 of them still walking and yell, "Wait!" as they turn to me. "Wait! I can't accept this," I huff approaching them.

  "Yes, you can. And if it makes you feel better we'll beat the money out of Keith tomorrow," the quiet guy from the end says laughing.

  Not sure what to say, I kind of freeze staring at the four of them. "I really can't. This feels too weird. Like I'm being paid for being groped or something," I mumble embarrassed.

  "No, you're being paid for doing a good job tonight considering how uncomfortable Keith made you feel. You earned a huge tip from all of us tonight for not only kicking Keith in the balls verbally, but for kicking the rest of us in the balls as well." When I laugh and cover my mouth, another one continues.

  "Saige," the intimidating man says, "You handled yourself amazingly well, and you have nothing to be embarrassed about. I hope my own sister handles herself half as well with dickheads," he grins at me, "as you do."

  "Take the money. It's a gift toward your schooling," the good looking man from the middle says with another one nodding beside him.

  Looking at the four of them, I feel like crying again I'm so stunned by their kindness. "Thank you very much. You have no idea what this means to me, especially right now. Um, thank you," I babble again.

  "You're welcome," the suddenly less intimidating guy says. "You should go back inside though. It's not safe out here alone," he waits until I nod. "Good luck, Saige."

  "Thank you," I repeat like a dumbass turning to walk back to the door of D'Vecseys. Looking back as Mike opens the heavy wooden door wider for me, they're still watching me so I wave once and step inside.

  "So?" Mike asks beside the door as I enter.

  "So, they said I was amazing for handing them all their balls," I laugh as Mike does. "They said the tips were for school, they wished me well, and told me to go back inside where it's safe. Um, they were very nice and they insisted I keep the money."

  Leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, Mike smiles down at me. "They sound like real good guys. And they're right, Saige. Even I want to call Silvana later to make sure men don't treat her poorly after what you said," he grins referring to his own sister.

  Walking back inside, Mike and I separate to start the cleanup of our section. He has to supervise the restaurant side as well, but it's fairly quiet so he always returns to the bar/lounge side with me to help.

  Waiting for the 11:00 official close down, the loud music begins as all of us from both sides start cleaning and tidying. Thinking about my kind table of men, I catch myself smiling often, shaking my head frequently, and giggling from time to time. But when I start scrubbing tables my mind immediately goes back to missing Tyler.

  Thankfully, I made a killing tonight in tips and I can breathe a little easier about everything else right now knowing I'm in the motel for the next 3 days. So between my tips tonight and the little money in my savings account, I have more than enough money for another security deposit on a new place.

  My exam is over, my conditional acceptance to school should be lifted within weeks, and I can finally start moving past this shitty day and a half of my life... And past Tyler.

  After the clean-up when I attempt to leave work at quarter to 12 Mike asks where I'm sleeping tonight. He asks with sensitivity and concern. He asks as a dear friend. He asks because he loves me and is concerned for me. He asks, and then he freaks the hell out on me when I tell him.

  Demanding I go back to his place As. A. Friend. We have our first real argument since I started working at the restaurant 2 1/2 years ago.

  When I tell him its fine, he yells it isn't. When I say I'll be safe, he tells me I won't be. When I tell him I don't have any other options right now, he tells me I'm being a stubborn ass.

  When I eventually burst into tears, he stops yelling at me, gives me a huge hug, and demands I wait for him so he can follow me to the motel.

  CHAPTER 6

  Parking in the spot right outside the door of my motel room I wave at a totally unamused Mike motioning for me to get inside. Opening the door with an actual key I know a text should come any minute now from Mike, and it does before I've even locked the door.

  'I can't believe you're staying there. It's not a rent by the hour but it still sucks. It's not safe. Anyone can break in that window and kill you.'

  'Wow. Did you just text that?' I ask stunned.

  'Sorry. Will you please come to my house?'

  'No. But thank you again. I NEED to sleep.'

  'I'll let you sleep.'

  'I’m going to cry all night.'

  'I don't care.'

  'Are you driving and texting?' I ask to change the subject.

  'Talking and driving. My phone is texting for me. Are you sure Sage?' Looking at the text I see talk to text always spells my name wrong.

  'I’m sure. I won't get murdered tonight. I'll text you tomorrow.'

  'In the morning.'

  'Yes, Sir.' I grin.

  'Does anyone else know you're there?'

  'No.'

  'Good. Don't tell anyone. Does Selena know?'

  'Not yet.'

  'She’s going to be mad at me for letting you stay there and for not telling her. And she’s going to be super pissed that you stayed there. Call me if you need anything.'

  'Okay. Good night, Mike. Thank you for caring enough to make me cry when you yelled at me :)'

  'You're welcome :p'

  Looking around my room, it's actually fairly nice. I picked a cheap motel, but its right outside the University neighborhood, so it's a better cheap motel. I think they rent to visiting parents maybe, so they keep it clean and somewhat modern. Besides, I'm okay here for only a few days I hope, because after that I plan on having a plan.

  For tonight though I just plan on sleeping. Immediately.

  Hopping into the bed after I change, I snuggle in and feel cold instantly. I haven't slept alone in 3 years since Tyler and I moved in together. A few nights he came home very late after a game or concert out of town, but other than that I've slept beside him always.

  And I miss him.

  Reaching for my phone when another text comes through I hope it's only Mike. I saw earlier I had a few texts from Tyler I didn't read, and I don't want to know who else texted me in case it's Kyle.

  'Look outside the window.' Shit. Really?

  Crawling back out of the bed, I shiver from the cold room but look anyway and almost jump out of my skin when Mike has his face plastered creepily against the window. Laughing at my reaction as I grab my own chest with a scream I quickly throw open the door.

  "I can't do it. I can NOT leave you here alone. So you either come with me or I'm staying here. Your choice," he says seriously though still laughing a little at how much he freaked me out.

  Panicking I look around my small room. "But there's only one bed."

  "I'll sleep under just the comforter, and you sleep under the sheets and comforter. No touching. No nothing. Just sleep. And in the morning we'll fight a
bout where you're staying tomorrow night," Mike walks in jumping on the far side of the bed I hadn't turned down for myself.

  When I watch him settle in I can't move. We're just friends and he even said as much but I feel very awkward having him share a bed with me. After a few tense seconds though he seems to understand my trepidation.

  "It's not like that, Saige, I promise. And even if I felt like that about you, I wouldn't do anything about it the day after your huge breakup. I'm just keeping you company tonight, I promise."

  "Okay..." I agree feeling totally awkward still.

  Walking over, I crawl back in, feel Mike turn the opposite way, and try my best to relax when I flip off the lamp.

  This is so strange and unknown for me I feel a little childish, but I'm really uncomfortable if I'm being honest. I actually do trust Mike, it's just I've never shared a bed with anyone other than Tyler and that makes me think of Tyler and ache for Tyler, and just lose it.

  Crying as quietly as I can, I wipe the tears sliding over the bridge of my nose, and sniffle as gently as possible. I try to hide my upset, but when I feel Mike slide a hand over the covers to gently pat the back of my leg the tears pour from my chest harder.

  Sobbing, I realize I love and hate Tyler almost equally, and I don't know how to move past this.

  When I feel my tears dry up a little, I reach for the plastic glass of water I filled earlier and swallow it down along with all the resentment and agony I feel in my heart.

  "You okay?"

  "No," I cry feeling Mike's body move on the bed like he's nodding.

  "You will be. Good night, Saige," he whispers before I repeat it with a heavy heart and heavier eyes.

  *****

  Waking, I'm alone again. I know Mike left early because he made me get up and lock him out but I fell right back to sleep almost instantly. Wanting to text Mike, I look at my phone and realize it's almost 10:30.

  'Thank you for last night. You've been a very good friend to me always, but especially now. Could you please not tell anyone at work what's going on, or that you stayed with me. Or basically anything at all to Kyle so he doesn't tell THEM anything. Thank you. I'll see you in a few hours.:)' Almost immediately Mike texts back.