He leaned down to kiss me again, and I wanted to go on being kissed, but instead he went in to pay for the gas and get some ice for me.
While he was inside, two police cars pulled into the gas station. One sheriff’s deputy, one highway patrolman. The cops got out and walked over to the car, looked at the tags.
I knew what could happen when a dark cloud and the police came together, so I opened the door and got out of the car. That way, when Kellen came out of the gas station and saw the cops, I was there to take hold of his hand, where his knuckles were bloody. Even though I knew it would hurt him, I squeezed his hand hard, to hold him.
“Evening, officers.” Kellen squeezed my hand back, so I knew he understood me.
“This your car, sir?”
“Yes, it is.”
“We had a report you were causing trouble down at the barrens south of Garringer. Is that true?”
“No, I wouldn’t say I was causing trouble.”
“We had a report you assaulted somebody and vandalized his vehicle.”
“I was provoked,” Kellen said.
“Provoked how?”
“That son of a bitch in the Mazda hit … her.” The hesitation was because he didn’t know what to call me. A lie? Daughter, sister, niece? Or the truth?
“Is that true, young lady?”
I stepped away from Kellen, closer to the cops and their flashlights. I pushed my hair back to show them my face. I hoped it looked as bad as it felt. From the way the cops frowned, it must have.
“What was I supposed to do?” Kellen said. “Am I supposed to put up with some asshole punching her?”
“And who exactly is she? She looks a little young to be out this late,” said the deputy.
“I’m taking her home now.”
The patrolman almost laughed, but the deputy frowned.
“Let’s see some ID,” he said.
Kellen got out his, but I didn’t have any.
“And who’s the girl?”
“Wavy Quinn.” I liked my name in Kellen’s mouth.
“Does your mama know you’re out with this guy?” the deputy said.
“Yeah, her folks know she’s out with me.”
The two cops stepped back and whispered to each other for a few minutes.
Then there was so much arguing it hurt my head. The deputy said I couldn’t leave with Kellen. He said, “We need to speak to her mother,” and “We’re going to have to book you anyway, so why don’t we just go down to the station?”
“You’re seriously gonna arrest me for whooping that asshole? Because look at her, you can see he hit her. I got witnesses. So why are you riding my ass? Why aren’t you out arresting him?”
“Don’t you worry, sir, we’re taking care of him,” the patrolman said.
“How’s that? I don’t see you taking care of him. I see you hassling me over bullshit.”
“We just want to talk to her parents, okay?”
“Okay, fine. They’re gonna tell you what I’m telling you.”
At the police station, when the deputy called the farmhouse, nobody answered. Mama had probably turned off the ringer. Then he called Sandy’s trailer and nobody answered there either. I sat in a chair in the sheriff’s empty office while the deputy took Kellen to charge him for assaulting the guy in the Mazda. It was only a misdemeanor, so Kellen got to post bail right there, but he still had to have his picture and his fingerprints taken.
He came back, wiping ink off his hands and arguing with the deputy. His name tag said Vogel.
“I’m gonna have to call Children’s Protective Services,” Deputy Vogel said.
“What the hell for?” Kellen’s black cloud was back. Bigger.
“Because we got a minor here and not knowing who she is, I can’t let her go with you.”
“How about this? Why don’t I go get her mama? Take me an hour to get there and an hour to get back. Think you can wait to call somebody ’til then?”
“I couldn’t get CPS out here before then anyway. I just don’t want to release her to somebody who doesn’t have any business taking her.”
Kellen’s mouth got hard, but he didn’t say anything to that. He ran his hand over my hair and said, “I’ll be back, Wavy.” He glared at the deputy. “And can you get some ice for her eye?”
After Kellen left, Deputy Vogel brought me a bottle of pop and an ice pack, but I didn’t touch them.
Being in the sheriff’s office was a lot like when Mama got arrested, but at least I was dressed with my boots on. When they arrested Mama, I had to sit in the police station for hours, just in my nightshirt, while strangers walked in and out and talked to me. And tried to touch me.
The deputy didn’t try to touch me, but he sat at the sheriff’s desk, asking me questions.
“So how do you know Mr. Kellen? Or Mr. Barfoot? That’s his legal name.”
I stared through him.
“Where did you two meet?”
I crossed my arms over my chest to let Deputy Vogel know he was wasting his time.
“Not at school, I’m guessing.”
Ha ha ha.
“You know this isn’t his first assault charge?” he said.
I knew. Kellen didn’t get those scars on his knuckles from playing poker or fixing motorcycles. He got them from pulping guys in the face.
“He’s got himself quite a rap sheet. Doesn’t hardly seem like the kind of guy a sweet girl like you should be hanging around.”
I was so sweet. Like a lemon drop.
I stared through the deputy until he had to get up and walk around the station to get away from me.
It was almost five o’clock in the morning when Kellen came back. I recognized the sound of his boots on the tiles outside the sheriff’s office, but it wasn’t Mama with him. Clicky heels, but too slow. I turned and looked out the window blinds. Sandy.
She looked tired but beautiful. A different kind of beautiful than Mama, who was dark. The sun was always shining on Sandy. Her hair was as blond as mine, but big and hair sprayed. She wore lots of makeup, and tight jeans and a tight T-shirt with no bra.
“Hello there, ma’am,” the deputy said. He sounded surprised, and I could tell he thought Sandy was sexy. He kept looking and looking at her. It made me wish I looked older. If I looked more like Sandy, the cops wouldn’t think I was too young to be out with Kellen.
“Hi, sweetie,” Sandy said to me. “You ready to go home?”
I nodded.
“Wow, that guy really did a number on you.”
“Are you her mother?” the deputy said.
“Yes, I am. I’m Valerie Quinn. I’m not sure why I had to get out of bed at o’dark-thirty to come tell you that, but here I am.” Sandy wasn’t like me. She always sounded sweet, even when she was mad.
“I’m sorry, Mrs. Quinn, but you can see why we were concerned about her being out so late with him.”
“No, I guess I don’t see.”
“I wasn’t sure her parents knew where she was.”
“Well, of course, I knew she was with him. Don’t you think I’d be out looking for her if I didn’t know where she was?”
“I just wanted to be sure,” the deputy said.
“Is that all? Are we free to go?”
“Yes, ma’am, but can I just say? You ought to keep an eye on your girl. You shouldn’t ought to let her out with a man like—”
“Thank you so very much for the advice. We’re gonna go now, if that’s okay?”
I got up when Sandy did, but before we could walk out, the deputy reached across the desk and handed me a piece of paper.
“If you ever need anything, Wavy Quinn, you call me,” he said. That’s what was written on the paper, his name—Deputy Leon Vogel—and his phone number. I stuck it in my pocket and followed Kellen outside to the car.
Sandy stretched out in the backseat and slept all the way to the ranch, snoring a little. I curled up beside Kellen and rested my head on his leg. Even though we didn’t talk, I s
tayed awake to keep him company.
When we pulled into the yard in front of Sandy’s trailer, Liam was standing on the porch, drinking a beer. Kellen got out of the car and folded the seat up so Sandy could get out of the back. Liam came down the stairs, his eyes red. If you could see into him, see what he was, his eyes would always be red. The sun was coming up when he walked across the driveway and grabbed Sandy by the arm.
“What the fuck is going on? Where you been?”
“I got into this whole dust up down by Garringer. Me and Wavy went out to the drags, I got in a fight, and a Belton County deputy gave me a rash of shit about Wavy being out so late. He wanted her folks to come get her.” Kellen was talking fast, so I knew he was nervous. I scooted across the seat and swung my legs out of the car. So he wouldn’t be alone.
“And what the fuck was Sandy doing out at the drags?”
“I didn’t go, Liam. I went to get Wavy,” she said in a soft, don’t-hurt-me voice.
“What the hell does that mean?”
“Well, Val couldn’t go. You know, she couldn’t go. So I went, to get Wavy. I just told them I was Val and—”
“Oh, I see,” Liam said. “You went and pretended to be her mama?”
“Yeah, I—”
“You went and pretended to be Val? My wife?”
Sandy was wringing her hands, not like Mama, who always stood up tall when Liam was getting ready to hit her.
“It was just to get Wavy. Not for—”
Pow! Liam smacked her right in the mouth. Kellen could be fast when he wanted. He yanked Liam back from Sandy so hard the beer bottle flew out of Liam’s hand and landed in the gravel.
“You wanna hit somebody, you hit me. It’s my fault. Sandy didn’t do nothing wrong,” Kellen said.
Liam’s fist crunched into Kellen’s jaw, hard enough to make his head snap back.
“I don’t like people sneaking around behind my back,” Liam said. “You know that, Sandy.”
“We weren’t sneaking,” she whispered.
“It wasn’t sneaking.” Kellen had his mouth clenched up like his jaw hurt. “I didn’t see no reason to wake you up. Sandy was up anyway, so—”
“And what were you doing up?” That was all Liam cared about, where Sandy was.
“I can’t sleep when you’re not here,” she said.
“I was just next door. You know that.”
“Well, we didn’t wanna wake you,” Kellen said. “Sandy said she’d go. And the cops were fine. They didn’t hassle her. Anyway, I’m sorry. The cops were just—”
“Fucking pigs. What business is it of theirs? Like they got any business telling me what to do.”
“I know.” Kellen finally put his hand up to his jaw.
“You took this out to the drags? I didn’t know you had it finished yet,” Liam said. He leaned down to look at the polish on the Barracuda’s hood.
“I finished it yesterday. That’s why we took it out.”
“How’d it do?”
“It’s goddamn fast,” Kellen said. He knew how to make Liam look the other direction. “I think it’ll beat just about everything out there. Well, not one of them big-block Corvettes, but damn near anything else. We smoked a ricer, which is how I got in a fight.”
Liam laughed and looked down at his empty hand. He reached over and slapped Sandy on the leg. “Go on in the house, baby, and get me and Kellen a beer.”
“Okay.” She hurried up the steps and slipped inside.
“How fast?” Liam said.
“I hit one-oh-five in the quarter-mile. Think she’d do one-forty out on the flats.”
Sandy came back with the beers, already open. Kellen took his and drank.
“We should take it out,” Liam said.
“Yeah, there’s some money to be made. Plenty of guys with newer cars think they can take an old beast like this.”
I touched Kellen’s leg and he shifted the beer to his other hand. When he lowered his hand to his side, I slipped mine into it.
“You gotta stay outta trouble, Kellen. I got work for you to do. Can’t be having the pigs hassling you on bullshit charges,” Liam said.
“No, you’re right.”
For a few minutes, they were quiet, drinking their beers.
“Well,” Kellen said. “It’s late. I guess I better take Wavy on up to bed.”
“Stay outta trouble.”
“I will.”
I scooted back in the car and Kellen got behind the wheel, with the beer bottle between his legs. At the farmhouse, he didn’t turn the engine off, and he was quiet, worrying. I turned around in the seat, put my arm around his neck and laid my head on his shoulder. He sighed.
After a few minutes, he put his arm around me and kissed my hair again.
“I had fun,” I said.
He laughed.
“You got punched and arrested, and you had fun?”
I nodded, careful not to bump my head against his jaw. He squeezed me tight, almost as tight as I needed. Tight enough to let me know he wasn’t too afraid of Liam. Tight enough to tell me I was important to him. A little tighter and I would know I was more important than anything else. That was what I wanted.
7
WAVY
March 1982
When Donal and I came home from school, a shining red Corvette was parked in the driveway. Uncle Sean was standing in the front room, smiling and running his hands through his hair. Blond, like Liam’s. Mama was dressed and pretty and smiling back at him.
“Do you remember your uncle, baby?” she said.
I remembered him. He came to stay with us after Liam got arrested. Before Mama got arrested. Uncle Sean was loud, like Liam, and sneaky. He had tricks to make you smile when you didn’t want to.
To warn Donal to be careful, I pinched him, but he said, “Ow, Wavy, don’t,” and went right to Uncle Sean. Laughing with his mouth open, he let Uncle Sean roll him around on the rug and tickle him. Dangerous.
Then Liam came, and he and Uncle Sean slapped each other on the back. Loud thumping slaps that made my shoulders tight. I didn’t want to stay there, but I didn’t want to leave Donal alone with them. He was still little.
Uncle Sean tried to lift Donal up the same way Kellen did and said, “God, he’s big! Are you serious he’s only six?”
“He turned six back in January,” Mama said.
“I thought he was born in March.”
“January,” Mama said. “And he’s big for his age.”
Liam picked Donal up, too, and said, “He’s gonna be a giant.”
“Like Kellen!” Donal shouted. Mama frowned when he said that, but I hoped he was right.
“Let’s have dinner,” she said.
She took down Grandma’s cookbook and flipped through it. Nothing belongs to you. It didn’t matter that Grandma gave the cookbook to me. All Mama had to do was hold it in her hands and it was hers.
“Oh, please, the good meatloaf,” Sean said.
“Yeah, baby,” Liam said.
Donal, too: “Meatloaf!”
“Alright, alright!” It made Mama smile, everyone asking her to feed them.
Uncle Sean went to buy groceries with the list Mama wrote, and he said, “You wanna come with me, Don? Ride in the Corvette?”
I wanted to hug Donal before he left, because what if Uncle Sean didn’t bring him back? But he ran out to the car before I could.
They came back laughing and made a mess. Hamburger blood dripped off the counter onto the floor, and Mama and Liam snorted meth off the kitchen table, where it left dust under the metal edge that was so hard to keep clean.
They made so much noise. A broken plate, Liam laughing, Donal squealing. Then Uncle Sean turned on the radio and danced Mama around while the potatoes burned.
“Damn, you’re gorgeous. Why don’t you leave this chump and run away with me?”
Mama laughed but her eyes looked hot and scary.
“Here, now, are you trying to romance my wife right under my
nose?” Liam said.
Uncle Sean laughed and twirled Mama around, while Liam set the table.
“Oh, Liam, put a plate on the table for her anyway,” Mama said. Her eyes were so soft when she looked at me standing in the hallway, but I knew not to trust those eyes.
“I’m not gonna sit here with her watching us eat,” Liam said.
“But your mama made the good meatloaf. You don’t want any?” Uncle Sean came toward me with a green olive in his hand, but when I ducked my head, he laughed and popped the olive in his own mouth.
Pulling up chairs to the table, no one else noticed the rumble of the Panhead coming up the drive. They were too busy putting food on their plates: burned mashed potatoes and greasy meatloaf, because Mama forgot to put bread in the bottom of the pan.
“Damn, did you smell the meatloaf from down the hill?” Liam said, when Kellen walked in. “This son of a bitch can eat, in case you couldn’t tell.”
Uncle Sean laughed and stood up to shake hands. “Come on, pull up a chair.”
“Thanks, but I just came to get Wavy.” Kellen looked at me for a second, not long enough. Liam made me invisible. I needed Kellen to see me.
“Get Wavy for what?” Mama said.
“To go for a ride.”
“Uh-oh, Wavy, Donal’s gonna eat your meatloaf if you don’t.” Uncle Sean reached out with another green olive stolen from the meatloaf. Donal opened his mouth and took it.
That scared me. What if it wasn’t dangerous for Donal to be with Liam and Sean, because he was one of them?
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Mama said. “It’s dinner time, Kellen, and we’ve got company. She’s staying here to visit with her uncle.”
“Sorry, I didn’t know. Maybe tomorrow, Wavy.”
Kellen went out and closed the door. His boots thumped down the porch steps, but I didn’t hear his bike start. He was outside waiting for me.
“Make her go up to her room,” Liam said to Mama.
I thought about going after Kellen. The only question was whether to leave Donal. I slipped my fingers between the slats of his chair and pinched him hard in the side.
“Ow!” He turned around and looked at me with confused, almost-crying eyes.
“Wavy, what did you do to your brother?” Mama said.