“I’d nail him. If I was single and not knocked up and stuff.” Nina shrugged with a grin.
“He’s only got eyes for Grace right now.” Grace looked up, alarmed, but Megan shook her head. “No, don’t worry. It’s natural. You just did the tri-bond with him a few weeks ago. In a while it’ll ease up for him maybe. And if I’m still horny and hot and we’re in the same state at the same time, I’ll jump him then.”
“But you’d rather find your mate?” Grace turned the meat.
“Sure. I’m getting older, I want that connection you all have. At this point, dating seems pointless.”
Later, after dinner, after Grace had said her good nights and retired to the solitude of their bedroom, she thought about what Megan had said. A biological gift in many ways, the older a werewolf got, the harder it was to live without a mate. She’d been so consumed by her job and then dealing with Warren she hadn’t really had a romantic life. For wolves like Dave and Megan fully immersed in Pack life surrounded by mated couples, it had to be much more difficult.
She read in bed for a while, not wanting to sleep until Cade finished up. His hour had long since passed but she understood all this stuff was complicated and took time. Still, she realized how much of her life he’d filled up when she missed his presence so acutely.
* * *
Cade quietly entered the room and saw her sleeping, a book open on her lap. His hour had turned into four as they’d discussed the traitor who’d sold information about their whereabouts to Warren Pellini. That information had nearly killed his wife and sister.
Lex and Jack had gotten their information and the man was no longer a threat. He was no longer anything. The pilot checked out, lucky for him, but they’d no longer use a service and Lex would do all the piloting for Cascadia higher-ranked wolves until the war was over. Jack would go back on a plane Templeton was sending out and the other Packs had been notified of this issue and were instituting their own safety measures.
She’d been upset earlier. He knew the smile she’d given him wasn’t real but he had too much on his mind and he knew she understood that too.
Standing there, looking at her in his very large and formerly empty bed, she put things in perspective. His impatience at this war was more personal. Warren Pellini’s bullshit stopped him from being able to have alone time with his woman. She spent her days in the lab and he in one meeting after another, one call after the other.
With a quiet sigh, he turned off the lights and headed to the bathroom to take a shower before joining her in bed.
But she apparently had other ideas when she stepped into the enclosure with him about five minutes later.
“Look, I’ve got the big bad Alpha all alone and helpless,” she murmured before kissing his chest just over his heart.
“Should I fear for my virtue?”
She laughed and took the soap from his hands. “Let me get your back.”
Dutifully, he turned and closed his eyes as she touched him. He choked on a gasp when her hands moved around to his belly and then she grabbed his cock.
“You should really be resting. You’re a test on my self-control. Wet, gorgeous and so damned sexy I can barely breathe.”
“Why self-control? Am I asking for that?”
He turned and backed her against the wall. “You were gravely injured just a day ago. Sex is the last thing you need, Grace.”
“Sex is exactly what I need. I need you inside me, filling me up and making the fear go away.”
He frowned at her. “Why are you afraid? God, honey, you know I’d die to protect you. I know I didn’t and you almost died.” He shoved a hand through his hair and stepped out of the shower, turning off the water and drying off.
She stood there, trembling but not leaving the enclosure. “Let me dry you off. Let me do something for you.”
“Am I just so bad at this whole thing?” Her voice was so small, it tore at him and he picked her up and began to dry her himself but the trembling didn’t stop.
“Bad at what? Are you all right? You’re shaking and really beginning to worry me.”
“This!” She angrily waved her hand between them.
“What are you talking about?” He turned and found a pajama shirt. Once he’d pulled it over her head, he ushered her into the room and yanked the blankets back. “Get in there before you turn blue.”
“I’m not cold!” She actually stomped her foot and he felt her through the link. Fear.
“Do you want to leave? To go somewhere safer where you’re protected better? Don’t you think I don’t obsess about what happened yesterday a million times a day?”
“Are you trying to get rid of me?”
“Why do I feel like you and I are on a hidden cell phone talking to other people having totally different conversations? Tell me what’s wrong so I can fix it. If you hate me, if I make you unhappy, just tell me.” He fell to his knees.
“You’re the one who can’t bear to be alone with me for three minutes. You say you’ll be back in an hour and it’s four. You tiptoe through our bedroom and take a shower but when I show up you can’t get out fast enough.”
“That’s bullshit! And unfair. I’m trying to keep my people alive, I’m sorry if I can’t be with you every minute of the day. I truly am because I’d love to be and I’m not being sarcastic. I’m trying to take care of you and a million other people all at once. It’s a lot to have on your shoulders.”
“Well, I do apologize for being a burden on you. God knows I’m quite aware I’m yet another thing on your to-do list. I can’t be all bitchy like Nina or a warrior like Tegan. I’m sure I’m a disappointment to you. Do you imagine Nina’s face when you fuck me?”
He froze, her pain sliced through his anger. His anguish. Their exhaustion and worry for the other. Her fear was for him, not of him or for herself.
He surged up and pushed her back to the bed. One-handed he ripped the front of the pajama top open and exposed her skin to his. “That’s beneath you. And you know it.” He kissed a hot line down the tendon at the side of her neck and she arched into him, pulling him closer with legs she wrapped around his waist. “You’re all I think of. If you’re safe. If you’re happy. If you’re well. I just want you. Always you. Only you.”
“Then for heaven’s sake fuck me.”
On a strangled laugh, he guided his cock to her gate, groaning when he found her hot and slick-wet. One flex of his hips and he was inside. She writhed against him, cunt tightening around his cock as she made soft, needy sounds.
“You’re not a burden to me. You complete me, damn you.” He rolled, bringing her atop him.
She planted her hands on his ribs and rose and fell over him. “Then stop acting like it. I’m not going to break. I’m your partner not your ward. When I grab your package in the shower it’s not for pity, it’s because I want you. If I was too weak for sex, I wouldn’t be riding you like a pony right now, would I?” She paused, panting as she increased her speed, grinding herself into him on her downstrokes. “And if you blame yourself for what happened yesterday once more I’m going to twist your balls right off.”
He winced. “You’re a mean little thing. And good lord your pussy is tight. You’re my woman to protect. Of course I—um, worry about what happened yesterday. Don’t blame myself of course!” he added quickly and she laughed.
“Werewolf males have an annoying tendency to think they can control everything in the world when they can’t. Warren has money, he used it to betray me, betray you, betray his people. That’s who he is. This subject is making me squicky so stop it now and make with the sexin’.”
“Always. But one last thing, you’re not a disappointment to me. Not ever. I’m so amazed by you. Awed. Proud. Thankful. You’re more than I ever imagined my wife would be.” He ran his hands over all of her he could touch, marveli
ng in her very presence.
“If you die, I will be so pissed off.” She leaned down and captured his mouth with hers.
Sliding his hands down her back, he cupped her ass, holding her open and reaching around his cock to find her clit and circle it as he thrust up into her.
“I said I was going to wait until you’d recovered more but I can’t resist you when you’re being all demanding. Now come for me,” he murmured.
She gave him that squeak he loved so much and her cunt rippled around his cock as she came. What he hadn’t quite expected was to feel her teeth sinking into his chest just above his nipple.
Sensation, feral and hot, rushed from the spot she held in her mouth to his cock and he exploded inside her.
Sometime later, she rolled off and into the curve of his body that’d been made just for her. “Oh. Well then. Thank you. I feel very lucky too. But I worry about you. I worry one day you won’t come home. It’s a dangerous time right now.”
He kissed her. “I’m careful. You’re careful, or you will be. And we’ll make it through. When this is over, you and I are going away for a while. Just us.”
“Good. I want to hog you all to myself.”
“You know, and I hesitate to bring this up, but all that could have been avoided if you just said what you felt right up front. I want you to be honest with me. I was afraid you hated me,” Cade said.
“I’m sorry I’m so bad at this. It’s not like I’ve had a dozen boyfriends.”
He felt, rather than saw her annoyance and it made him want to laugh. For all her precision, she was still a woman, still partly human and thus, as fallible as he was at the relationship stuff.
“You’re perfect.”
“Nicely said.”
Chapter Fourteen
Grace awoke early and got out of bed, hoping to take advantage of the quiet and get some work done. In a rare moment, Cade still slept. As much as he’d had to deal with over the past weeks, she left him that way. He couldn’t run on adrenaline forever and crashing right as he needed the energy wouldn’t help anyone.
Plus, she thought as she looked down at him, tawny skin stretched taut over muscles, he looked really good. Before she jumped on him, she took one long, last look and headed out.
Of course the moment she stepped out her door, two guards were there. She sighed. “Morning, Hiroshi, Dave. I need to get working today.”
“All right, Grace. We’ll escort you down. Does Cade know?”
“He’s sleeping and he needs the rest. Don’t you dare wake him up.” She saw their anxiety. “Look, guys, he’s sleeping, I like it that way. You’ll both be with me. The lab is like some secret governmental facility with all that security. I’m not hiding where I’m going and I’m not being unsafe. Come on, I’ll even let you take me in that ridiculous Hummer. As long as someone runs to grab me breakfast when we get to the lab.”
She continued to walk until she reached the kitchen. Nina, another early riser, was up and shuffling around. Lex sat at the table and watched her with hungry eyes. It made Grace smile and she liked to think Cade looked at her that way too.
“Good morning. Want some coffee? I like to watch other people drink it while I suffer in silence.” Nina snickered.
“Silence? Yeah, sure,” Lex mumbled and Nina tossed a pot holder at him.
“That’d be great. In a to-go cup please, I’m on my way to the lab. And before you ask, Cade is sleeping and he should stay that way. Your brother needs the down time.” Thank goodness Lex was sitting so she could attempt imperious by looking down at him instead of up into his towering face. She spoke as his Alpha and she saw it flash in his eyes but then it eased and he nodded.
“I agree. Dave, add one more guard and take the Hummer.”
She wanted to grin at her victory but instead touched his arm and turned to Nina, who winked and handed her a cup.
“Coffee to go. Did you write him a note at least? Because, you know he’s going to be grumpy when he wakes up and you’re gone.”
“I did leave him a note with my schedule on it, yes. I know he thinks he can be in a hundred places all at once, protecting everyone and everything but he can’t and I have a job to do and I don’t want to hinder his job with it. If he has to babysit me every time I go to the lab, how can he get his work done here?”
“You’re right of course. I’m his guard for the time being, until this is finished and we can relax a bit.” Lex gave her an appraising and, unless she was mistaken, appreciative look.
Twelve hours later, she reached up to rub her aching neck only to have her hands moved, replaced by big, warm, sexy hands.
She breathed deep and Cade overran any scents of the lab. She leaned back into him. “Hi there.”
He kissed the top of her head. “Quitting time, Dr. Warden.”
“I’m on to something here, Cade.”
“You can find it the day after tomorrow. Tomorrow is the joining ceremony and our house is already bursting with people. Dinner is in ninety minutes. My mother was going to come down here herself so you should thank me.”
She turned. “Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry. I totally forgot. Let me shut this down and set up this other program to run all night.” She kissed him quickly and turned back around to finish up.
He sat and she felt his warmth just behind her. It filled an empty space she hadn’t realized was the source of her discomfort over the day.
“I shouldn’t tell you this, it’ll only make your ego bigger.” She turned to him after she’d hung her lab coat up on a peg and grabbed her bag. “But I really missed you today.”
He smiled, slow and sexy. The way he approached her, muscles moving against the tight, dark shirt he wore, branded him a predator and she wasn’t so very unhappy to be his prey.
“Good. I missed you too. Thank you for your note and for taking along another guard. I wasn’t pleased to wake up alone, but I do hear you growled at anyone who thought of waking me up. I like that, being protected by you.” He pulled her close, one arm around her waist. With no more than a slight bit of energy, she found herself being dragged up that hard wall of chest and meeting his mouth with hers.
“Can I tell you a secret?” she asked, her lips against his.
“Yes. Especially if it’s dirty.”
“The whole big-guy thing you do? All strong and stuff? It really, really does it for me.”
He laughed and she swallowed the sound greedily. “Good. Now, you don’t need to feel guilty about forgetting. You’ve had a few more things on your mind than the joining ceremony.”
She put her arms around his neck as he walked them out. Dave kept his eyes averted but Grace did see his smile.
Cade had woken up without her there, without her warmth, her smell still on his skin. He’d seen the note she’d left on her pillow and smiled. She had things to do and he wasn’t going to be able to stop her.
He’d read her precise, neat, uniform writing as she detailed her day for him and smiled. Minx. She’d closed with her wish for him to sleep as long as possible so he could rest up and her worry he wasn’t getting enough down time. And after that, she’d even given him one little x and one little o. Disarming.
Still, he’d given her the space to do her job and as soon as he’d headed into the main house he’d been barraged by one thing after the other until he looked at the clock and realized it was already after five and he went to get his woman himself.
She sat, body pressed against his the whole ride home and didn’t complain about the Hummer once. He knew how much she hated the giant vehicle so she must have accepted the fact that it was necessary for her safety.
“I will say my dress arrived the day before I left for Chicago.”
He looked down at her. “Dress?”
“For the joining?”
“Ah! Okay. Security is going to be insanely tight tomorrow and it won’t be the full ceremony you deserve but Ben and Tegan can’t be here because of the war. Apparently Tegan is pretty pissed about that. When this is over, and yeah, I’m sure you’re as sick of hearing it as I am of saying it, we’ll do something that befits you.”
She sighed and looked up at him. “Do you really think that sort of thing matters to me? I’m already yours. This ceremony is about the Pack and your family really. So fine. But it doesn’t change what already is.”
Dave laughed from the front seat as they drove through the various checkpoints at the house. Cade hated living in an armed camp but with the increasing levels of violence he had little choice.
She followed him out of the car, even letting him pick her up to help her get to the ground but when she caught wind of the din coming from the house she stiffened.
“Are you still having problems with Nina? I thought you two had become fast friends.” He pulled her to the side and motioned for the guards to give them some space. Lex went to the stairs leading to the house and took point, eyes scanning the horizon.
“No, everything is fine between us. I can’t say I’m totally comfortable knowing the depth of her feelings for you, but now that I’ve got Jack as my Anchor I can understand it and I know she loves Lex. Why do you ask?”
“You just got very tense.”
“We can talk about it later. Let’s go inside.” She averted her eyes.
He stopped her, tipping her chin so he could see her face. “Honey, tell me now. Don’t you remember last night?”
That sweet mouth of hers curved into a sly smile and he laughed. “Not that part, well, okay I’m glad you remember that part. The fight part.”
“I just like quiet. And solitude. Not a whole lot here. I’ve lived on my own for many years and I just never feel alone here. I’ll get used to it, I’m sure. I like your family. I just don’t want to be with fifteen other people every moment of the day.”