XI
He gave her holy water at the door of the chapel, and her eyesacknowledged it with a glance that sent something very pleasant intohis heart.
Then, with an impulse of discretion, to efface himself, he knelt at thefirst prie-dieu he came to. But Susanna, instead of going forward,knelt at the prie-dieu next to his.
The chapel at Craford is a dim, brown little room,--the same room thatin the days of persecution had been a "secret" chapel, where priestsand people worshipped at the peril of their lives. You enter it fromthe hall by a door that was once a sliding panel. In the old daysthere was no window, but now there is a window, a small one,lancet-shaped, set with stained glass, opening into the court. Savefor the coloured light that came through this, and the two candlesburning on the altar, the chapel was quite dark. The Mass was said byan old Capuchin, Father David, from the convent at Wetherleigh; it wasserved by Adrian.
You know "the hidden and unutterable sweetness of the Mass."
For Anthony, kneeling there with Susanna, the sweetness of the Mass wasstrangely intensified. He did not look at her, he looked at the altar,or sometimes at his prayer-book; but the sense that she was beside himpossessed every atom of his consciousness. Her kneeling figure, herwhite profile, her hair, her hat, her very frock,--he could see them,somehow, without looking; his eye preserved a permanent vision of them.Yet they did not distract his thoughts from the altar. He followedwith devout attention the Act that was being consummated there; theemotion of her presence merged with and became part of the emotion ofthe Mass. They were offering the Holy Sacrifice side by side, theywere offering it together, they were sharing the Sacred Mystery. Itseemed to him that by this they were drawn close to each other, andplaced in a new relation, a relation that was far beyond the mereacquaintanceship of yesterday, that in a very special and beautiful waywas intimate. The priest crossed the sanctuary, and they stoodtogether for the Gospel; the bell was rung, and together they bowedtheir heads for the Elevation. They knelt side by side in body, but inspirit was it not more than this? In spirit, for the time, were theynot absolutely at one?--united, commingled, in the awe and the wonder,the worship and the love, of the Presence that had come, that wasfilling the dim and silent little chapel with a light eyes were notneeded to see, with a music ears were not needed to hear, that hadtransformed the poor little altar into a painless Calvary, whence werediffused all peace, all grace, all benediction? They knelt side byside, adoring together, breathing together the air that was now in verydeed the air of Heaven. And it seemed to Anthony as if the Presencesmiled upon them, and sanctioned and sanctified the thing that was inhis heart.
"Domine, non sum dignus," solemnly rose the voice of the priest,"Domine, non sum dignus . . ."
It was the supreme moment.
They went forward, and side by side knelt at the rail of the sanctuary.