“It’s like gambling when you can’t calculate the odds or count the cards,” he murmured. “You’re so in control of your working world and even of your fantasy world that it scares you when you encounter something you can’t completely manage, doesn’t it?”
He was right, she realized, and in the vulnerable aftermath of their lovemaking, she couldn’t find the strength to deny it. “When…when we met in Las Vegas, you seduced me just as easily, but when I left, I felt I still had everything under control. You were part of the fantasy world, but I could leave that world behind when I returned to California. I still felt relatively safe.”
His fingers tightened on hers. “You mean as long as I stayed in my proper place, you still thought you could juggle a fantasy life and a real life.”
“It seemed possible,” she agreed with a sigh, wondering what was going to happen now.
“Then I showed up on your doorstep tonight, and you realized your carefully separated worlds were about to collide,” he concluded a little roughly.
“Yes.”
“I warned you before you left Vegas not to think of me as an illusion,” he reminded her grimly.
“Yes,” she said again. But she hadn’t heeded the warning.
“I saw the fear in your eyes several times during the course of the evening, you know,” he went on in a falsely conversational tone. “I knew I’d really thrown you for a loop by showing up here in Ventura. But I was furious with you for having relegated me to another side of your life. I had expected to arrive just in time to keep you from going out on a date with another man. I hadn’t expected to find you giving a party. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do at that point, and then you solved the problem very neatly by introducing me as some damn expert in probability theory.”
Alyssa winced, remembering her burst of “inspiration.” “You certainly carried off the role very well!” she muttered caustically.
“I had fun,” he told her simply. “I thoroughly enjoyed myself tonight, Alyssa. Just as you enjoyed yourself last weekend in Las Vegas playing the role of mysterious lady gambler.”
“But you…I…” She stumbled over the protest, seeking a way to explain the difference. “When we spent the night together in Las Vegas—”
“You still felt an element of safety because you knew you’d be leaving that world behind. Tonight, when I made love to you, it was happening in your safe, controlled, real world, and you knew you weren’t going to be able to leave it neatly behind this time,” he concluded for her on a fierce note. “Well, from that standpoint, perhaps you were right to be a little scared. Because you can’t package me up and ship me back to Vegas, honey. I’m the only lover in your life now, Alyssa. And I’m going to make sure that’s true for both of your lives!”
She turned her head quickly on the pillow, her lips parted to say words that had not yet formed in her head. The words never emerged. He sealed her mouth with his own, crushing her softly back against the pillow….
The omnipresent sound of the ocean filtered slowly into Alyssa’s consciousness along with the light of a new morning. She blinked sleepily, aware of the heavy weight beside her in the bed and the unaccustomed sensation of warmth from another body. Slowly, she allowed herself to focus on Jordan’s intriguingly ruffled hair as he lay asleep, facing her. The memories of the night washed over her, and she stared at the hard lines of his face, which were only partially softened in sleep.
Last night, he had spent the long hours of darkness making certain she would not ever be able to push him out of her life again. She had known that was his goal, sensed his desire to burn himself into her so thoroughly she would never be able to resist him regardless of which of her worlds he entered.
It was the deliberate way he had done it that left her feeling so high-strung and uneasy this morning. He had carried her into the bedroom with every intention of achieving his goal. Looking back at it, Alyssa was certain that when he had switched gears and resorted to a more tenderly seductive, gently luring approach, it had been deliberate. He had played her emotions the way he played cards.
What was this man doing to her? What was going to become of her if she did not extricate herself from his spell? Who he was and what he was threatened everything she had worked so hard to establish during the past few years. Her career at Yeoman Research would come to a dead standstill if it were ever discovered that she consorted with professional gamblers and even engaged in the reckless pastime herself. Professional gamblers were dangerous, untrustworthy and disreputable. They were not to be entrusted with positions of responsibility.
And were they to be trusted on more personal levels? Alyssa shivered faintly as she slipped silently off the bed and reached for her yellow robe. How was she going to get herself free of this man? How could she get the situation back under control? She didn’t dare risk another scene such as the one at the party last night. If Jordan insisted on invading her real world as he had last night, it was only a matter of time before her luck ran out.
Her luck. She had never really believed in luck until she’d met Jordan. Now she was definitely beginning to wonder about the phenomenon. If one accepted the premise that it existed, one had to also accept the premise that there was both good luck and bad. Meeting Jordan Kyle could only be a piece of incredibly bad luck for her.
It wasn’t until she found herself wrenching the faucets in the shower with a particularly violent twist that Alyssa realized just how much resentment was brewing in her that morning.
No, that was putting it mildly. She was furious. That man in her bedroom had no right to invade her life and turn everything upside down. He had no right to have such power over her senses. No right to be able to make her respond in his arms so thoroughly. The feeling of powerlessness, of being out of control of her carefully structured world, sent a chill of fear through her once again. She had to get free of Jordan’s magic web!
By the time she finished the shower, she was feeling tense, ready to snap or slash like a small, cornered animal. When she opened the door into the bedroom, the yellow robe wrapped securely around her, Jordan stirred lazily amid the sheets and propped himself up on his elbow to give her a slow, satisfied, remembering smile.
“Good morning, sweetheart. You’re up bright and early. Part of your normal routine?”
The slight reference to her “normal” world was made deliberately, she knew. Everything Jordan Kyle did was undoubtedly deliberate. Calculated. Such qualities were essential to the career he had chosen, weren’t they?
“It’s late,” she returned, not meeting his eyes as she strode firmly across the off-white carpet to her closet and began pulling out a pair of jeans and a long-sleeved shirt in jewel blue. “You’d better get dressed.”
He groaned, sinking back down onto the pillow. “Do I detect a shade of asperity in your tone?”
“At least you didn’t wake up to find me going through your wallet.”
“Ouch. That was unkind. I was desperate that morning.”
With her clothes bundled in her arms, she hurried back to the bathroom, feeling more than a little desperate herself.
Jordan waited until she reemerged, completely dressed, before he flung back the covers and got slowly to his feet. She saw the speculative, assessing gleam in his eyes as she swept past him toward the bedroom door, and then she was safely in the hall.
She would have to fix breakfast for him. There was really no way around that. And then, she promised herself as she violently sliced a grapefruit in half, they would have to talk. The situation between them had to be settled. It could not be allowed to go on any longer. The danger was far too great. What a fool she had been to contemplate an affair with the man!
The doorbell chimed just as she finished sectioning the grapefruit, and with a renewed pang of anxiety she went to answer it. Who could it be at this hour? Would she have to explain Jordan’s presence? What she did was her own business, of course, but still, it would be easier if she didn’t have to admit that
Jordan was not only a distinguished colleague but also a lover.
With such thoughts whirling in her head, she opened the door to find Ray Burgess standing outside. Surprise was in her voice as she greeted him.
“Ray! What are you doing here? I wasn’t expecting you. How are Julia and the baby?”
The pleasant, lanky young man on her doorstep grinned, blue eyes sparkling as he held up a check. “They’re just fine, of course. And I’m here only because I’m here on business.”
With a flourish, he proffered the check. “A thousand dollars, Alyssa. I sold three paintings this past week, and when it came to paying bills, you were on the top of my list.”
She stared at him, shocked. “A thousand dollars, Ray? But I can’t take this! I mean, you don’t have to worry about the money, please. I…”
“Alyssa, I want you to have it. I couldn’t have made it without you a couple months ago. I insist you take it, and no arguments.” He stepped forward and spontaneously kissed her cheek while stuffing the check into her reluctant hand. “Don’t worry, it’s not going to bounce,” he added, chuckling. “And there will be another one next month.”
It was Jordan, his dark voice at its most dangerous, who responded to the remark. “That check may not bounce, but you sure as hell will, all the way to San Diego, if you don’t take it back and make a very quick exit. And if you try to bring another check by next month, I’ll take you apart.”
CHAPTER SEVEN
AS THE LOW-VOICED THREAT REVERBERATED among the three people standing in Alyssa’s doorway, she and Ray Burgess both swung to face the man who had issued it. There was a moment of appalled silence while Alyssa groped for an explanation, but it was Ray who plunged in, anxious to pacify.
“Hey, it’s okay,” he murmured with an attempt at an engaging smile. He held up his hands in a gesture of innocence. “She’s not my lady, if that’s what’s worrying you, mister. I’m a happily married man. With a kid, no less!”
“Those qualifications haven’t stopped a lot of men from writing out checks for other women in the past,” Jordan growled softly. He slanted a disdainful glance at the younger man. “But this other woman is now private property. She won’t be taking your money now or in the future.”
“Jordan, stop it!” Alyssa finally gasped as she found her tongue. “You have no notion of what’s going on here. This is between Ray and me. It does not involve you!”
He flicked her a disgusted look, as if she weren’t very bright. “Everything you do now involves me. Remember?”
“We can run through that argument at a more convenient time,” she said angrily, her fingers curling into fists as she glared up at him. “For the moment, I would appreciate it if you would kindly step out of a situation that does not concern you!”
“Alyssa, let me explain it to him,” Ray began. He turned back to face Jordan. “I’m Ray Burgess, and I…”
“I don’t give a damn who you are,” Jordan swore before Ray could get any further. “I want you out of Alyssa’s home and out of her life. And take the check with you!”
“Stop giving orders in my house, Jordan!” Alyssa stepped between the two men, infuriated. On top of everything else, this scene was the last straw. “Ray is a friend of mine, and I will not allow you to stand there and yell at him!”
“I’m not yelling at him,” Jordan pointed out very, very softly. “But I will definitely do some damage to him if he does not remove himself immediately. Is that very clear to both of you?” His attention was fully on Ray.
“Look, Jordan, or whatever your name is, if you’ll just calm down, I swear I can explain everything.”
“I’m not in a mood to hear explanations. That check you’re trying to give Alyssa explains everything. Now get out.”
Disgustedly, Alyssa turned away from the implacable Jordan. “You’d better go, Ray. I’ll call you later, and we’ll settle everything.”
“You won’t be calling him later,” Jordan interrupted smoothly.
She flashed him a seething glance. “Please, Ray. It’s all right. Just go.”
“But, Alyssa, I can’t leave you here to face him. He’s irrational.” Ray stared at her worriedly.
“I’m aware of that,” she muttered. “But don’t worry about me. I’ll be all right.”
“Are you sure?” He flicked an uneasy glance at Jordan.
“She’ll be fine. Take her advice and leave,” Jordan snapped.
“If you lay a hand on her, I swear I’ll…” Ray began heatedly.
“I’ve already had my hands on every inch of her. And from now on no other man is going to have that privilege. Understood?”
“Jordan!” Alyssa felt the red rush into her cheeks. At that moment, she could cheerfully have throttled him if there had been any conceivable way of doing it. “How dare you say things like that?” she breathed, enraged. “How dare you?”
“That does it,” Ray announced firmly. “I’m not leaving until we get this settled.”
“Ray, please. Just go,” Alyssa begged, sending him an appealing look. “I’ll take care of myself. Don’t worry about me.”
Her friend shifted uneasily. “Are you sure, Alyssa? You can come with me if you think you’re in any danger here. We can wait until he cools down, and then…”
“You may stop discussing me as if I weren’t present,” Jordan drawled. “I assure you I’m very definitely here. Something Alyssa is having a little trouble understanding apparently. Get out of here, Burgess. And remember that Alyssa is now off limits to you or anyone else.”
Nails digging into her palms as she tried to control her temper, Alyssa nodded at Ray. “Go on, Ray.”
“You’re sure?” He frowned.
“I’m sure.”
“Well, at least let me leave the check…”
“No!” Jordan’s voice cracked like a whip.
“No, Ray, please take the check. I don’t need it. You don’t have to give it to me, really!” Anxious now to get her friend out of harm’s way, Alyssa began pushing him toward the step.
Reluctantly, Ray allowed himself to be pushed. Slowly, he walked out to his car, casting several suspicious glances back at the two in the doorway. Alyssa didn’t close the door until he drove off. Then she slammed it and whirled to face Jordan. Scathingly, she raked his lean, solid form. He had put on the dark slacks and shirt he’d worn the night before, and it was easy to see why Ray had been reluctant to leave her alone with the man. He looked more than a little menacing, and his golden eyes glittered with cold promise.
“You’re determined to barge into my life and tear it to shreds, aren’t you?” she flung at him.
“Alyssa,” he began grimly, only to have her slash across his words with the sharp edge of her tongue.
“You’ve just made a fool out of yourself and out of me! I hope to hell you’re satisfied! Never have I been so humiliated! And you wouldn’t even listen to a reasonable explanation, would you? Oh no! You had to blunder in like some sort of wild beast, wreaking havoc. You had no idea what was going on, and yet you took it upon yourself to interfere. Not only that, but you succeeded in thoroughly embarrassing me in the process!”
“Alyssa,” he tried again, a strong warning tone underlining the word. “It was damn obvious what was going on. Who the hell was he to think he could buy you for a thousand bucks a month? How many others have you got on the string? What’s the matter with you? Do you need money so badly that you not only hold down a full-time job but you gamble in Vegas and set up a stable of men to keep you in proper style?”
This time she silenced him with a sudden, vicious slap that left the imprint of her fingers against his cheek. The sound of the blow seemed to fill the living room. It was followed by a moment of terrible silence.
Then Jordan moved. One strong, skilled hand went out with the swiftness of a striking snake, capturing her wrist. He yanked her toward him until she was crushed against his chest.
“Who the hell is Ray Burgess? What’s he doing in yo
ur life?” The words came out clipped and icy.
From somewhere, Alyssa found the courage to reply. In that single moment, she was more frightened of Jordan Kyle than she had ever been of anyone or anything in her whole life, but a remnant of common sense told her the only route to safety lay in explaining the situation as quickly as possible. Why on earth had she succumbed to the temptation to slap him?
“He and his wife are the reason I discovered Las Vegas.”
Whatever the answer he had been expecting, that wasn’t it. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“If you’ll let go of me, I’ll explain everything,” she managed bravely.
He glanced down at the hold he had on the small, fragile bones of her wrist. Slowly, he unpeeled his fingers one by one until she was free. There was a red brand on her skin where he had been holding her.
Carefully, Alyssa disengaged herself, her hand going to the sore wrist. His eyes followed the small action, and she had the impression that he was a little shocked at the violence of the grip. “Ray’s wife is a close friend of mine. We had an apartment together for a couple of years in Los Angeles. She’s three years younger than I am. She met Ray almost a year ago when she came to Ventura to visit me. They’re both struggling artists, and they fell in love almost as soon as they were introduced. Julia married him seven months ago when she discovered she was pregnant.”
“Go on,” Jordan ordered.
Alyssa’s mouth crooked wryly. “Well, as I said, they’re both a couple of struggling artists. No extra cash and no medical insurance. Do you know what it costs to have a baby in a good hospital with a first-class doctor these days? It can easily run to three thousand dollars or more. And Ray wouldn’t have any less than the best possible care for his wife!”
“Oh, my God,” Jordan muttered, eyes narrowing. “They came to you for a loan?”