More than a little annoyed at this point, Rachel pushed away from the counter and stalked around behind it. Placing her hands on the surface, she glared at her brother. “So, everyone’s discussing my private life now? Did you have a conference call with Shelly and Josh this morning as well?”
“No, Rach, it wasn’t like—”
“You know what? I don’t care,” she said, effectively cutting him off. “I know you love me, Mason. I know that, but I need some time to myself.”
“Because of him?” her brother questioned, placing his hands on the opposite side of the counter.
“Maybe?” she hedged. “Would that be so bad? You don’t even know him.”
“Do you?”
Rachel thought about that for a minute before she shrugged. “No, not a whole lot, but I’m starting to. Isn’t that how things usually happen?”
Mason pushed back from the counter and ran a hand through his dark hair as he shook his head. “Usually, you get to know someone before you stay the night.”
Rachel raised an eyebrow at him before she laughed a little. “Okay, Dad.”
“You’ve just seemed so unhappy lately, Rach. I don’t want you to do something you’d regret.” Mason stepped behind the counter and took her hands in his. “You’d tell me if you needed anything, wouldn’t you?”
Rachel decided it was time to at least admit there were things going on with her even if she wasn’t a hundred percent sure what they were yet. Squeezing her brother’s hands, she looked up into eyes that mirrored her own and reminded her of the father they had both lost. “I just need some time to myself.”
Mason’s eyes creased on the sides as they focused on her. “I don’t understand.”
Rachel took a deep breath and blew it out, trying to think of how to word what she wanted to say. “I don’t know. Lately, I’ve been feeling like the fifth wheel, like I don’t belong, you know?”
“We’ve been making you feel like that?” he asked, concern covering his face.
Rachel shook her head and tried to explain. “No…well, not intentionally. Honestly, between you and Lena and Josh and Shelly, I’m just feeling a little bit…lonely.”
The expression that crossed her brother’s face almost broke her. He looked pained, like someone had ripped out a part of him and told him he couldn’t have it back. Pulling her to him, he wrapped his arms around her as she hugged his waist.
“I had no idea you felt like that,” he confessed against the top of her head.
“Why would you? I never told you.”
Pulling back from her a little, Mason nodded and held her for a moment. “Do you need me to sing?”
Rachel let out a small laugh. “No. No, I don’t need you to sing.”
“Are you sure? Because I think you do. It always helps.” He made a small production of clearing his throat, and then he began to hum before he started to sing, aww hell the entire chorus of My Girl, a song that was achingly familiar as he moved them around the flower store.
Rachel ran through the front door, slamming it behind her. Stupid dance, she thought as she reached up, tugging the hairpins from the French twist she had pulled her hair into. She knew it wouldn’t go the way she had wanted it to. Nothing ever did.
When Josh had told her he would take her to the winter formal, she had been so excited and, not to mention, a little nervous.
Being sixteen and having a senior take you to a dance was a big deal, but the fact that it was Josh—Rachel thought of him with a sigh—made it that much better.
She had spent hours picking out her dress, and she had finally decided on a light pink strapless one. It was made up of soft silk material that swept down around her knees, and for the first time in her life, Rachel felt like everyone else—pretty and not awkward.
At first, her father had been reluctant to let her go, but knowing that Josh was going to take her, her parents had relented and decided she could attend.
Now, I wish I never would’ve left the house, she thought as she ran up the stairs to her bedroom. She pushed through the door, moved over to the bed, and sat down, dropping her face into her hands. What an idiot! she kept repeating over and over in her head. She couldn’t believe what a giant moron she had been. How am I ever going to look at Josh? Or Mason? This was the worst night of her life.
As she sat there, berating herself, her door pushed open, and Josh poked his head inside.
“Can I come in?”
Rachel quickly wiped her tears, and looking away from the door, she mumbled, “Whatever.”
She heard him come into her bedroom and close the door behind him. Her heart started to speed up. Josh Daniels is standing in my bedroom, and we’re alone. How long had she been mooning over him? Yeah, well, that was officially over now since he probably thought she was a major loser.
“Why’d you run inside, Rach? I would have walked you to the door.”
Turning back to face him, Rachel glared up at the boy who held all her attention whenever he was around. “I’m pretty sure you know why, Josh.”
He took a step farther into the room and looked around. He looked uncomfortable.
Well, good. So am I, Rachel thought, feeling her embarrassment all over again.
“Look, there’s nothing to be upset about. We had a nice time, didn’t we?” he asked.
Rachel looked down at her hands clasped in her lap. Shaking her head, she felt the tears starting again. He looked so cute, standing there in his suit, with his shaggy brown hair pushed back. It was normal to do what I did, right? At least, she thought it had been until he had said no and pushed her away.
“Sure,” she murmured, reaching up to wipe another stupid tear off her cheek.
That was when she felt the bed dip beside her. Oh my god, Josh is sitting on my bed. Sitting as still as she could, she almost jumped out of her skin when he reached over and took her hand in his. Looking over at him, her mouth went dry as he smiled at her with the grin that every girl in school could not resist, including her apparently.
“You didn’t do anything wrong tonight,” he reassured.
Rachel tried to look away but found she couldn’t.
“It’s just…I’m with Lisa, and…well, you’re Mason’s little sister,” he explained.
Looking away to try and hide her shame, Rachel felt like an even bigger fool. When Josh reached out and cupped her chin, turning her face back to him, she was in shock.
“You took me by surprise,” he admitted.
Yeah, well, you and me both, pal, Rachel thought as she tried to pull her face away.
“Would you hold still?” he asked with a chuckle.
Immediately, Rachel found herself calming down when she did as she was told.
“Have you ever kissed a boy, Rachel?” he asked, his kind brown eyes searching her face.
Rachel felt her heart speed up as she stared at the boy she had known for most of her life.
“No answer?” he pushed.
Rachel couldn’t tear her eyes away from his mouth or make her lips move to speak as he leaned in toward her.
“Then, let me give you what you wanted. Let me be your first.”
After that, she didn’t remember much, except for the feel of Josh’s lips against hers. His kiss was so sweet that she felt it all the way down to her toes. He was her first kiss, and it was absolute perfection.
When he pulled back from her, he gave her a huge grin that warmed her heart and made her feel like she was glowing.
“There. Now, you’ve been kissed.”
Rachel sat still on the bed, trying to think of something to say, but for the next few minutes, she was content to just stare at him.
Right around the time things were about to turn from dreamland to the usual awkward world, she turned to the radio to switch songs. “My Girl” by The Temptations started to play through the speakers. It was the song her father had been singing to her for years, and everybody knew it, including Josh. Her father took any opportunity to embarrass h
er with impromptu serenades at birthdays, bedtime, and when he would dance her around the kitchen.
Josh stood and held out his hand to her. “You ran out on the last dance, so how about dancing with me now?”
Rachel stood and put her hand in his.
He pulled her forward and swayed with her as he sang in her ear, “My girl,” while he moved her around the small bedroom. Rachel closed her eyes and dreamed of her future, hoping it would include this boy.
I’m going to kill Josh and his big mouth, Rachel thought as she stared up at her brother.
“My cat is begging for you to stop,” she told Mason with a small grin.
He doesn’t need to know Tulip is hungry.
“Oh, is that why she’s meowing? I figured she was joining in.”
Rachel laughed and pulled away from her brother. “No, she was trying to drown you out.” Resting up against the counter with her arms crossed over her chest, she reiterated, “I just need some space. I need to be on my own for a bit. I love you all, but lately, I just need—”
“Space,” Mason answered for her. He pushed his hands back into the pockets of his jeans and nodded. “Fair enough, Rach. But the suit? Really?”
Thinking about Cole for a moment, Rachel had a flash of everything beneath the suit. She gave Mason a swift nod. “Guess we’ll see. He’s not that bad.”
“Yeah, he seems like a real barrel of laughs,” Mason muttered, moving out from behind the counter. “Okay, I’ll leave it alone. For now.”
When he got to the door, he reached out and put his palm on the handle, but then he turned, looking back at her. “Leave your phone on, would you?”
Rachel quirked her eyebrow. “Only if you promise not to call me every five minutes.”
Mason nodded. “See you tomorrow night?”
“Yep, I’ll be there. Oh, Mase?”
“Yeah?”
“Don’t worry, okay? It’s not you guys. It’s me. I’ll work this out.”
Mason didn’t look all that convinced, but he tried for a smile before he opened the door and stepped out into the cold air.
Rachel looked down at Tulip, sitting by her feet, as Tulip looked up at her as if to say, Uh, hello? You still haven’t fed me. Rachel stepped over the hairy annoyance and made her way to the back.
Feeling calm for the first time in a long while, she decided to really look at her life choices. She was going to take the week to not only be with Cole but to hopefully also be with herself. By the end of the week, maybe she would have some sense of direction and know exactly what it was she wanted out of life.
And if not? Well, at least, I’ll have a hell of a time getting to that final conclusion.
At their weekly Monday meeting, Cole sat in the boardroom with the other lawyers of the firm, looking down at his watch. Logan was running through the usual points of interest at work while flirting his way around the table as each attendee discussed the cases he or she had acquired. It wasn’t until the room fell silent that Cole realized everyone was staring at him.
“Cole, would you like to contribute in any way to your business and the running of it?” Logan questioned, his voice dripping with saccharine sweetness.
Cole sat up in his chair and frowned over at his partner. “Sorry, what was the question?”
Logan, who was usually the easygoing one, narrowed curious eyes on him. “Nothing. Don’t you worry your brooding self about it. Okay, everyone, that’ll be all. Go and win. Oh, and have fun crushing your opponent, of course.”
They all laughed as they filed out of the conference room one at a time, leaving Cole where he was sitting with Logan at the other end of the boardroom table.
“What’s up with you today, Madison? You’ve been a virtual space cadet.”
Cole shook his head and pushed up from his chair to stand. He straightened his suit and picked up his file.
“Is it your mom?” Logan asked.
“It’s nothing. My mind was just somewhere else.”
Logan gave him a shit-eating grin. “Really? I hadn’t noticed.”
“Logan?”
“Yep?” he replied, still aiming his smug, superior face in Cole’s direction.
“Shut up.”
“Aww, don’t be like that. It just isn’t like you to zone out. It’s more like me.”
“I’m sorry, boss. It won’t happen again,” Cole told him, making his way over to the door.
Logan got up and followed Cole, clapping him on the shoulder. “I’m just concerned.”
Cole glared at the other man. “Bullshit.”
From behind black-framed glasses, Logan’s blue eyes were laughing at him.
“You’re not concerned. You’re nosy.”
Logan moved away from him, and when he was halfway down the aisle to his office, he chuckled and shouted back, “Well, I’m always here for you when you want to talk, dear.”
Cole held back what he really wanted to yell in response as he walked back to his own office. As he was about to pass Jane’s desk, he stopped and tapped his fingers gently on the cool polished surface.
She looked up at him with a smile. “Is there something you need, Mr. Madison?”
“Yes, actually. For the next week, I would like all my meetings scheduled to end before five. I want to be walking out of the office at 4:59 p.m., and no later. Can you do that?”
Jane frowned, but she assured him, “Of course. Is there anything else?”
Cole thought about it for a minute. “Yes. Any calls that come in late should be directed to Logan. I’ll let him know I’m unavailable this week.”
“Okay, I’ll get the outgoing message switched.” She paused for a moment. “Will you still be attending the dinner for the new District Attorney on Thursday night?”
Oh shit, Cole thought with a groan before he had a thought. “Yes, I’ll still be there. Please let them know I will have a plus one.”
When he saw Jane’s mouth twitch, Cole took a moment to tease her. “Is something amusing you, Jane?”
“Not at all, sir.”
“I’m glad to hear it. Please hold my calls until I let you know otherwise.”
He moved past her and into his office. Closing the door behind him, he walked over to his desk, picked up his cell, and sat down. Twisting his chair around, he looked out the window. He couldn’t stop thinking about her. Ever since he had watched the cab pull away from his curb this morning, he had wondered if she would show up tonight. Not knowing was driving him insane.
Usually, he was the one consumed by work, not by a woman with huge blue eyes and multicolored hair. As he tapped his phone against his knee, he considered the possibility of her not returning, and then he found himself devising a plan to get near her again.
Convincing himself he had a good reason to call, he scrolled through his phone, and when he found her number, he hit call. After the second ring, she picked it up, and he felt his mouth pulling into a grin at her greeting.
“Well, well, well, if it isn’t Cole Madison.” Rachel leaned back against her couch and played with her skirt.
She had closed the store at four and made her way home, wondering when she would next hear from him. When his number had flashed on her phone’s screen, she had felt her stomach jump and her thighs squeeze together at the thought of talking to him again.
“So, it would seem,” he confirmed.
His low voice sent a delicious thrill of anticipation through her.
“And what can I do for you this afternoon?” she teased, tongue-in-cheek.
“I’d like to see you again. I thought I should let you know.”
Rachel had to stop the small giggle that threatened to bubble out of her throat. Is he ever anything other than formal? The only time she could recall was when he had removed his clothes, and even then, he had exuded an air of formality, or maybe that was just his authoritative manner.
“Oh? Well, you were so unclear about it all last night, and this morning, I wasn’t really sure,” she replied
sarcastically.
“Rachel?” he questioned in a cautionary tone.
And didn’t that just push her buttons. “Yes, Cole?”
“Meet me at six thirty, and I will make sure I am very clear with what I want from you.”
Rachel tried not to envision all the scenarios as she quickly asked, “At your place?”
“Yes. And Rachel?”
Swallowing slowly, she managed to respond, “Yes?”
Silence greeted her from the other end, and just when she thought she would scream in frustration, his voice came across the phone with a seductive warning.
“Don’t be late.”
Six thirty in the evening, and I’m right on time, Rachel thought as she pulled open the door to the lobby of Cole’s condo. As she made her way across the dark marble floor, she took a moment to take in her surroundings. It really is an impressive space.
A large fireplace and several couches were to the left of her, and in the center of the room was the security desk. Sitting there, a short bald man smiled at her in greeting as she walked toward him.
“You new to the building, miss?”
Rachel shook her head, her hair brushing against her shoulders now that she had removed her coat. “Oh no, I wish. I’m Rachel Langley, and I’m here to see Mr. Madison.”
The little man looked down at a list he had in front of him and then smiled back at her.
“Oh, yes. He called down a little bit earlier and told me to let you up.”
“Thank you. This place is lovely. So cozy.”
“Yeah,” he agreed, looking around. “It’s not too shabby, is it?”
Rachel let out a small laugh. “No, not at all. It’s beautiful. That fireplace is amazing. I could sit by it all day with a good book.”
“Well, you are welcome to come and sit by it anytime you like, miss.”
Rachel grinned back, enjoying the man’s jovial nature. She made her way over to the nearby elevators and reached out to press the button to head up to Cole’s condo. As an elevator arrived, she turned back to the security guard. “Well, that’s my ride. See you later—”