“When the hell did you get a tattoo?” Jeremy said.
He didn’t like body ink, a fact that I was well aware of when I got mine. “I got it after you pissed away our marriage, Jeremy.”
“What about the white part of it?” Shannon said.
“The white part is the yin. That’s the masculine. The hard. The light. I didn’t need masculinity to be complete, and I still don’t.” Or maybe that was what was missing from me—a big white hole that Jeremy had left behind. “What I can’t figure out is what happened to my other tattoo, the one on my shoulder.” I lifted my sleeve to show them bare skin. “I got it after I finished my first half marathon.”
“What was it?” Shannon said.
“A shoe.”
“A shoe?” they said in unison.
“Yeah, a fucking shoe. The shoe I wore when I finished the race. It was a good shoe.” I kicked my heel across the sewer and it bounced right back. “Better than this goddamn thing.”
“Maybe sometimes a tattoo scars your body and soul,” Shannon said, “and other times the tattoo only adorns your body.”
Those words sat for a while.
No one said anything until Shannon finally looked at Jeremy and asked, “Do these sewers run all through the neighborhood?”
He nodded.
“Then we need to go east toward Tara’s house.” She filled him in on our plan to board a plane and bypass the spiritual traffic jam here on Earth. She finished with, “So, are you in?”
“Of course,” he said. “I mean, so long as that’s okay with the ex.”
They both stared at me. I shrugged. “If you can help sure, sure. I mean, who doesn’t want to spend eternity with their ex-husband?”
He smiled.
Soon we were moving through the sewers, literally walking on water. Jeremy stayed at the rear, and we stopped occasionally so Shannon could poke her head out of a storm drain to get her bearings. We stopped and ducked whenever a herd of Shadys passed overhead.
At one point, when we were walking through a particularly dark patch of sewer, Jeremy said, “You remember that time a snake popped out of your dashboard?”
I grinned. “Yeah.”
“Get out,” Shannon said.
He nodded. “True story. We were out on Herr Road in this Dodge Ram van she used to drive, middle of nowhere. All the sudden, she screams like a banshee and slams the brakes and hops out of the van.”
“It was the freakiest thing,” I said. “The dashboard had this pale green illumination. I looked down, and the greenish shadows started . . . slithering. I thought maybe it was some kind of acid flashback, but then I realized a goddamn snake was crawling out of my dashboard.”
“Snakes don’t have legs,” she pointed out. “They can’t crawl.”
I ignored her. “The damn thing must’ve wiggled up in there while I was parked.”
Jeremy laughed. “We tried like hell to get the damn thing out, but it wouldn’t budge. Had to drive the whole way back to town knowing that it was up in there somewhere. It was creepy as hell. That’s what this reminds me of. It’s like we’re just waiting for the shadows to come alive.”
“Nice thought,” I told him.
“The more I think about what’s happening in the sky,” Jeremy said after a long while, “the more this makes sense. I mean, why drug or distract the population when it’s just as easy to steal their souls?”
“And here we go,” I said, looking back at him.
“What?”
“Nothing, Jeremy. Go on. Enlighten us poor bleating sheep as to how this is all some big conspiracy orchestrated by multinational corporations. Or is it shadow governments? Or the Illuminati?”
“I don’t know who it is, Molly, but let’s stop and think about this.” He gestured wildly with his hands as he talked—an old habit that started back when our marriage was collapsing. “Clearly, there’s an afterlife. We’re proof of that. So it’s not a stretch to assume that reincarnation is a real possibility. Our souls pass through this Light and are somehow upcycled into new souls. However those souls pass back to Earth, it’s safe to say that if the entrance to the Light is blocked, likely the exit is blocked as well. If no old souls are getting to the other side, then no new souls are getting to the earth. It explains a lot. The current level of apathy. The decline in morality. The rise in mass shootings. Reality TV. It’s all because new generations are lacking souls—or at least quality souls.”
I shook my head. “Well, I’m glad to see some things never change. You’re still batshit crazy.”
“Actually, he’s got a point,” Shannon said. “That’s not too far off from what you were saying earlier—about the Earth being turned into a trash heap for junked souls.”
“Stay out of this,” I told her.
“Don’t yell at her, Molly, when you’re really mad at me.”
“I’m not mad at you, Jeremy. Being angry at you got old years ago. I did that for a long time, and eventually realized it wasn’t worth the energy. I’m not mad at you anymore. Now . . . now I’m just sick of you.”
He stiffened and nodded. “I’m sorry you feel that way. I understand why. I hate what happened . . . what I did to us. I was scared, Molly. We had this perfect home and I had this perfect job and there was all this pressure. Do you know I used to wake up every night around one in the morning, heart racing in my chest?” His hands flailed again, and he pounded on his heart. “I’d be covered in sweat and I’d lie next to you and watch you sleep, terrified that something was going to ruin everything we had. Eventually I just tired of being anxious—of being exhausted. I let the voices on the radio fill me with righteous anger. It was better to be pissed off than frightened all the time. At least the outrage made me feel stronger. So, I embraced that hate when I should’ve been embracing you. I’m sorry. It was my fault. I fucked us up.”
I stepped toward him. My anger soured into sadness. Tears welled in my eyes. “I’m sorry, Jeremy. I should’ve realized you were hurting. I . . . I didn’t know. I mean, I knew something was wrong, but I didn’t know what. Or why. I just wanted to be happy, and it was easy to ignore anything that didn’t fit with that.”
Our souls collided. He hugged me tight, and I buried my face in the crook of his neck. I wished I could smell his musky scent. My hands came around his waist, and I could tell he was fighting back tears. Then we were both crying, and salty bits of ectoplasm squirmed through the air. The places where we touched tingled, and it was easy to lose myself in the comfort of another. I massaged his shoulders and pulled back so I could look him in the eyes. Our auras glowed with golden light.
“When did you realize all of this—about your anger?” I asked him.
“It was a long walk from Cincinnati. I had a lot of time to think. And something about dying—it opened my mind.”
My lips quivered, and I remembered that they were only half covered in lipstick. He didn’t seem to mind. I got lost in the moment. He leaned in for a kiss. My hands moved to his head—either to stop him or pull him in, I wasn’t sure which—but he grabbed my wrists. His eyes darted toward Shannon. When I looked at her, she was crying too.
“I’m sorry,” she said.
I went to her and held her while she cried, but all the while, I was watching Jeremy. Shannon sobbed against my shoulder and I didn’t know what to do but pat her back. I considered asking her what she was sorry for, but it didn’t seem to matter. Our touch points tingled, like walking on a foot that had fallen asleep. The sensation was on the verge of orgasmic, and I wondered if she felt the same thing. Her tears triggered my own. All the while, Jeremy could barely look at me.
“Thank you,” I mouthed to him.
He nodded.
A chill passed over me, and I knew the Shadys were close. I whispered to Shannon, “You have to be quiet, dear. They’re coming.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I’m sorry . . .”
We sat together, raw and exposed while the dark spirits passed overhead. When
the chill passed, she said, “We have to hurry. Mr. Noble should be leaving soon.”
“What time does he go to work?”
“Fucking soon.”
We trudged down the cramped sewer, the murky water cluttered with dead leaves and moldy advertisements. A bit of strength had returned to my limbs, but I was still tired. We stopped at a storm drain and I boosted Shannon so she could peek outside.
“Tara’s house is right across the street,” she said. “Her dad just got into his truck.”
A moment later, a door slammed. An engine grumbled to life.
“Shit,” she said. “We have to go.”
I shoved her through the drain. Jeremy knelt below me, head tilted back to face me.
“Go,” he said, fingers laced together.
Except he rose, close enough that I could almost see through the pale haze surrounding him a hint of brown around his massive pupils. He straightened his back and grabbed my face. Leaned in. I almost let him kiss me.
Instead, I put a hand to his mouth.
“No,” I said.
“But I came all this way.”
“And that was wonderful and brave and I appreciate it, but I’m not going to kiss you. Not now.”
He nodded and laced his fingers for me to step on. “Go. I’m right behind you.”
It was a tight fit through the storm drain. By the time I wiggled free of the sewer, Shannon already sat in the back of the dark blue pickup across the street. The reverse lights blinked on. Shit. I turned back around. Jeremy was halfway out of the storm drain. Something looked strange about the back of his head, but I didn’t have time to look closer. I grabbed his hands and tugged. My ass and heels dug into the ground. I gritted my teeth. Behind me, tires ground on asphalt. The truck’s suspension clicked and rattled.
Down the street, a swarm of shadows oozed around the corner. Slick and quiet. The Shadys broke into a full run, sprinting right toward us.
13
Jeremy grunted and strained against the thick rusty metal. I gripped his wrists and pulled. Where we touched, our auras crackled with gold flecks. At last, the sewer birthed him into the night. He spilled on top of me, and tingling pleasure rippled through me. We locked eyes. His face hovered over mine, close enough that I could feel his breath if we were still into the whole respiration thing. I swear his black squirming pupils started to ooze downward out of his eye sockets, and I could almost feel my own pupils swelling out of my irises to meet his. I swallowed hard. The gold flecks turned silver. For a moment, I regretted not letting him kiss me.
“What the fuck are you two doing?” Shannon yelled. “Get the hell over here!”
Her words ruptured our moment. My bulging eyes snapped back into my skull, or maybe that was only my imagination. The Shadys poured like a wave of black water down the street. The blue Toyota jerked forward. We scrabbled to our feet and chased after the truck. Shannon stood in the open bed, beckoning for us to hurry. I grabbed Jeremy’s hand, and again our combined energy propelled us forward. Our feet blurred like fan blades, but not fast enough to catch the pickup.
At the end of the street, the Toyota’s brake lights flashed on. The tires ground to a halt, and we closed the gap. Red light poured through us, tainting our auras and turning us into urgent demons. Mere steps away, the truck lurched forward again. We sprang into the air—arms outstretched. I snagged the rear bumper. Jeremy grabbed the tailgate. The road hammered at my knees and scraped at my pelvis. My shoe popped off and returned. Popped off and returned. Shannon reached down and clutched my wrist. Soon, the three of us tumbled into the truck bed, panting more out of memory than need.
“They’re coming,” Shannon said.
She was right. Behind us, the Shadys ran as one. They must’ve learned from watching us, because now they were holding each other’s hands—arms outstretched like that game we used to play—Red Rover.
Red Rover, Red Rover, send Molly over.
It was a rough game. A line of children holding hands running at another line of children trying to tear through them. Red Rover never ended with anyone winning. No, that game always ended in tears and blood.
Row after row of Shadys poured down the street, eclipsing the asphalt with their impenetrable darkness. They numbered in the hundreds. The nearest row closed in on the truck, now only a few paces away. Churning waves of cold rolled over me.
Jeremy slammed his palm on the side of the truck. “C’mon, goddamn it.” As if the driver could hear him.
“Throw something at them,” Shannon yelled.
“How?” I said. The truck bed was full of empty cartons of motor oil, scraps of wood, and crushed cans of Red Bull—and we could lift none of it.
She dropped and grabbed my kitten heel, yanking it off and chucking it back at the mob. It was a good shot. The ghostly footwear beamed the closest Shady right in the eye. My foot went numb at the contact. The spook clutched its face and tumbled. The front row broke formation, and soon the whole mob collapsed upon itself like a black wave crashing on the shore.
The shoe arced back toward me. I snap-kicked my tingling foot upward and the heel slid back into place. Shannon and I exchanged wide smiles.
“Fuck,” Jeremy said.
A second later, I saw why.
The brake lights glared again, and the truck slowed. We’d reached the exit of Hilltop, and the damn pickup sat rumbling at the stop sign. It was the middle of the night. No traffic was coming.
“What the hell is he waiting for?” I said.
Shannon peered in the rear window. “He’s sending a text, I think.”
Behind us, a few of the Shadys scrabbled out of the pile of black twisted limbs. They sprinted toward us, now five houses away. The truck still wasn’t moving. Jeremy pounded on the roof.
Four houses away.
“He can’t hear you,” I said.
Three houses away.
“He’s putting the phone down,” she said.
Two houses.
The truck lurched into gear.
One house.
We pulled out of the subdivision but not fast enough. The Shadys ran with their arms linked together, a demented dark chorus line. They were closing the gap fast. We were screwed, no doubt about it.
Jeremy grabbed me by the neck and waist. He kissed me hard. Like he was never going to have another kiss. Our teeth clicked together. His tongue caressed mine. His beard tickled my face. A silver glow coated our merged auras. Our souls blended like coffee and cream.
Without warning, he pushed me away and leapt off the truck.
That was when I saw that the back of his head was a cavernous hole. A fucking crater burrowed into his brain. That was why he’d grabbed my wrists earlier—to hide his wound. He hadn’t died from alcohol poisoning like he’d hinted at. No, he’d blown his brains out.
Suicide.
My legs gave out, and my ass slammed into the truck bed. I could only watch as he tackled the first Shady, knocking it to the ground. Spinning wildly, he kicked the next one in the gut. He got in two more punches before they took him down. The Shadys’ mouths stretched impossibly wide—like boa constrictors—as they bit his arms and face. Everywhere they snapped at him, they left behind patches of deep shadow. Blackness splattered into the air. He thrashed and screamed my name. More Shadys leapt on top of him, biting at all the light until there was only darkness.
I couldn’t not watch—too stunned even to cry. The truck sped away down a country road, no streetlights, and only a smattering of farmhouses.
“Jeremy,” I said. “What have you done? What have you done?”
Shannon sat beside me, an arm around my slouched shoulders. I stared down the road, though Jeremy had long ago fallen out of sight.
14
THE DARKNESS
The Darkness swarmed around Jeremy—feeding and growing. Its disciples sank their blackened teeth into his flesh, extinguishing that dim distasteful light that had infected his soul. The man flailed and screamed but eventually the
Darkness prevailed. It always did, because the Darkness was patient, unlike the hungry and needful Light that rode on the back of fire, whipping and cursing. The Light plundered the Darkness for coal and oil, anything that might sustain its cruel spark.
But as the Darkness slipped inside its newest vessel—this strange little bearded man called Jeremy with the hole in his head—it claimed the man’s memories. Shadows throttled phantom synapses and flexed ghostly muscles. Normally, the Darkness slipped inside slowly, entering the host over the course of three nights. But it was different this way, when the Darkness relieved an untainted soul of its burdensome light so quickly. Instead of dripping inside, the Darkness flooded into the spirit. A shocking fire flickered inside the phantom skull. Anger fueled the flames, but love smoldered at the inferno’s core.
Jeremy was a rare treat, indeed. His soul would’ve become an earthbound ghost even without the Light being broken. His twisted love and devotion for that woman would’ve anchored him in this world. Even now, it defied the bubbling shadows.
The Darkness washed over the angry flames. They flickered and gargled. Steam hissed. Jeremy’s limbs flailed and twisted. The disciples held him down, teeth tearing into his essence.
That fire tried to endure, but the Darkness proved too strong.
It infused that lovesick core and those raging flames.
In doing so, the Darkness splintered from itself.
Like wine filling a glass, it took shape.
The man’s shape smiled and rose.
It felt all of Jeremy’s feels.
Such simmering rage.
And yes, love.
The disciples kneeled and bowed their heads before their newly formed master. The shape ignored them, staring instead at the truck’s taillights, twin demon eyes fading into the darkness. Her name was Molly, and oh how he longed to have her. But first, he needed a name. From Jeremy’s skull, the proper designation appeared.