“Can you do it? I want to get some lunch. I haven’t eaten anything yet.”
Jonathan leaned over the desk with concern on his face. “Of course I can, but is there something wrong? Is everything okay between you two?”
“Fine. I’m just really hungry that’s all. I get grumpy when I’m hungry.” I smiled weakly at him and I knew for sure he was unconvinced.
I said goodbye to him anyway and headed straight for the door. I needed coffee and to sit somewhere on my own to think.
I was sat by the window after ordering my Americano when a familiar face walked past. It was Paul. When he glanced my way he waved enthusiastically and came in to join me.
“Angelina, hi. So nice to see you again.” He leaned in, giving me a peck on the cheek, and sat down beside me.
“I’ve been trying to call you.” I gave him a face that told him I was more than unimpressed.
He shook his head, and I could see the frustration as he sighed. “That’s nice to know, but do you want to know why I haven’t answered?”
“Tell me.”
“Well, the night we met, my phone miraculously disappeared.”
In an instant I knew why. Seth had this uncanny knack of being able to sneak phones into people’s bags. Would it be so preposterous that he would also be able to steal them?
“Seth,” was all I said. Paul’s reaction immediately confirmed my suspicions. “He told me that us having coffee wasn’t going to happen.”
Paul erupted with laughter as he ran his fingers through his golden brown hair. He certainly had the charm like Seth, but they didn’t hold any resemblance. “I think we should change that right now,” he said, patting me on the shoulder. “Do you want another?”
“No, I’m fine. I only really just sat down when I saw you walking past.” He ventured off to order a coffee, leaving me to shake my head at Seth’s obviously lack of etiquette. I couldn’t help but chuckle a little. For some reason it made him even more irresistible, if that were at all possible.
“He’s a giant ass.”
The sound of Paul’s voice had me jumping out of my skin, and nearly knocking my coffee over.
“I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.” Paul wrapped his coat over the chair and took a seat beside me.
“It’s okay. I was in a world of my own, thinking about what Seth did.” I smiled politely at him, but I knew I was a bundle of nerves. I’m never normally this jumpy. I have an evil, sadistic monster to blame for that.
“You know he likes you, right? I had no idea just how much until I heard he went to Cornwall at the weekend. Most people didn’t know why, but I remember you telling me that was where you were from originally. I put two and two together.”
My tension eased a little as the laughter erupted. “Yes, he did follow me. I was actually running away from him.” I couldn’t believe how candid I was being with Paul. I’m not normally this open about things, but Paul somehow had this ability of making me feel comfortable around him—even though this is only the second time we had met.
“Can I ask why you were running?” He took a sip of his coffee and stared at me for a while until I answered.
“I can’t believe I’m telling you this. Even Seth doesn’t know how I feel yet. Please don’t say anything to him.” With my look pleading, he nodded his head and gestured for me to proceed.
“I really like him. I can’t believe I said that out loud.” I chuckled a little, but it was more of a defeated chuckle then a genuine, hearty one.
“You don’t need to feel ashamed of that, Angelina. I can understand your caution with my nephew, but deep down, he’s not a bad man. He’s been through some stuff that no one should have to go through. I can’t go further than that, but what I will say is—he has learnt to shut out the outside world. He doesn’t let anyone in to care enough about them. I think he’s frightened of losing something—something solid—something real. I think you might be the best thing that’s ever happened to him.”
I was in complete shock. In my time with Seth, he gave no indication that he was just as damaged and broken as I was. I had this urge to reach out to him, but at the same time something was pulling me back—telling me not to get too close.
“I had no idea. He never gave anything away. He always seems so cool and so in control of everything.”
Paul took a sip of his coffee and glanced out of the window for a moment. “I’ve probably given away more than I should, but you’ve got to know that this is the persona he has learnt to live with. He’s had demons weighing down on him for many years. I’m sure you’ll find out soon enough, but it isn’t going to be from me. Just rest assured that I’ve never seen him like this with anyone, the way he is with you. I only want to say that if you like him too, please don’t hurt him. He really doesn’t need to suffer anymore than he has already.”
I was speechless. I didn’t quite know what to say. I was so busy worrying about my own problems that I failed to realise that Seth might actually have some of his own to deal with.
All of a sudden I felt a huge weight on my shoulders. It felt like a lot to take in and endure. It was way too much—almost suffocating. Right then I didn’t quite know what to do for the best.
“Look, I know it’s a lot to take in. You seem like a really nice girl. That’s why I warned him off you when you first met. Now I know how much he likes you, things have changed a great deal. I don’t want to upset you in any way. I just want you to know that there’s more to Seth than meets the eye. He hurts just like the rest of us, and I care about him—even when I’m calling him an ass.”
I looked into his sincere eyes as we both started laughing. I know what he’s saying. He approves of Seth and I as long as I don’t fuck it up. Strange how the tables have finally turned.
“I appreciate you telling me, Paul. I don’t want to hurt Seth either.” And that’s exactly why I felt I had to walk away. I couldn’t let Seth get embroiled in my mess when he had his own demons to face. It just didn’t seem fair.
After giving Paul a hug and thanking him for his time, I went back to work in a daze. The pain gripped at the thought of never seeing Seth again, but it was what I had to do—and I had to do it to protect us both. It wasn’t just about me anymore. I just couldn’t do that to him.
By the time I was back at work I felt physically sick. I knew it wasn’t because I had eaten something bad as I had hardly eaten a thing all day. I was love sick—pining over someone I had finally let into my life. Someone I had learnt to fall in love with.
Shelly was at my desk as soon as I walked in. She looked concerned and I could tell she really wanted to say something, but knew how serious I looked. This wasn’t a discussion to be had at work.
“Jonathan told me that I must tell you to go and see him the minute you get back to work. He says it’s urgent.” She gave me an apologetic look as I stumbled out of my chair and knocked on Jonathan’s door.
“Come in!”
Shutting the door behind me, I quickly noticed how unimpressed Jonathan seemed. When he saw how I looked though, his face softened.
“Angelina, has something happened?” He shot out of his chair as quick as lightening and rushed over to be by my side.
“I’m fine; I just don’t feel too well.” And I didn’t feel well. I wanted to throw up—really badly.
“If that’s the case you can go home now. But I have to tell you something before you do. I called Seth.” The unimpressed look was back again.
“Okay.” I was eager for him to get to the point so I could get the hell out of here.
“He wanted to know what was wrong with you. He said that you seemed jumpy and scared, and that when your mum rang, you freaked out and ran. I thought you told him, Angelina? You said he knew.”
“He had no right to say that.” I was trying in vain to be pissed off about it, but I was feeling too bad to even care.
Jonathan shifted his weight and placed his hands on my shoulders. I felt so ashamed of myself th
at I dipped my head. “Angelina, please look at me.”
The sincerity in his voice had my eyes lock onto his. “Why did you lie to me? Why did you lie to your mum and dad? They think you’re safe with Seth protecting you, but you’re not. Do you know how much this will hurt them when they find out? Do you realise how much this will hurt Seth once he knows? He demanded I tell him what’s wrong, but I didn’t say anything. It’s not my place, but he knows there’s definitely something wrong.”
I didn’t know what else to say, so all I could say was sorry. He gave me a great, big warming hug and tenderly stroked my hair. It was soothing and almost took the sickness away. It was still simmering on the surface, but at least it wasn’t boiling over now.
“Listen, I have to say this to you. Either you want him in your life or you don’t, but it sounds as though he cares about you way too much to let this lie. I don’t think he’s going to stop until he knows what’s wrong.”
I sighed into his shoulder in defeat. I’m not sure what I was going to do about this, but I had to be strong and try to push him away.
“I need to go. I need to think. I feel awful, Jonathan.” Pulling away, I headed for the door.
“Okay, take what time you need, sweetheart. Just let me know by the morning if you’re coming in.”
“I’ll be in tomorrow. I just don’t feel too good now.” He nodded his head and I made my way out with only a goodbye to everyone. I craved my own company for a while—with the exception of Jerry of course. He was the one living creature in my life I could seek solace in.
Chapter 12
The next three days went by in a haze. I came to work, did what I had to do and went home. I would lock myself up in the tower, away from the outside world, and I hated Jaden for it. I would curse him several times for making me feel this vulnerable. I haven’t felt this way since that fateful night—the night that my whole world was turned upside down. The night that guilt has been following me for the last eleven years of my life.
Seth tried calling over and over again. It got to that stage where I switched the phone off just so that I could stop hearing “Angels” haunting my every waking moment. My heart and body sought for him. I would wake from my dreams calling his name over and over until my head was spinning. My head seemed to override what my heart and body wanted. It had protected me all these years, and I wasn’t about to let it down now.
The three days that went by were awful. I kept looking over my shoulder, convinced someone was watching me and following me. I was becoming a paranoid freak thinking I saw monsters in the shadows.
On the third day of my living hell, I was in the middle of closing my last client of the day. It was six o’clock and pitch black outside. I said goodbye to the lady who I was showing the house to, and was imminently aware of how alone I was once she got in her car and drove off.
For some reason I felt sick. Nausea was creeping in my stomach and my spidey senses were telling me something was wrong. Seriously wrong. I thought it best to just lock up and get the hell out of there. I can reach the King’s Road in under five minutes and then I should be safe.
I walked a little way down the road and everything was quiet—a little too quiet. I could feel the hairs rising on the back of my neck, and had to turn round to take a look at what could be causing this. I felt like I was being watched—or followed—or both. When I looked though, there was nothing there.
I kept my pace, quickening that little bit more. I could see the King’s Road within reach. I could see how busy it was from a distance and how welcoming a sight that felt. I don’t normally enjoy the noise, and the people, but this time I needed it—craved it. I didn’t feel safe, especially when I had a voice inside my head shouting at me to get the hell out of there.
“Princess.”
My feet froze at the sound of an all too familiar voice. I hadn’t heard that voice in eleven years. He appeared from beneath the shadows—the monster that haunts me. He had aged somewhat since his time in prison. His wavy brown locks I used to love were now lifeless and greasy. He still looked like the handsome teenager I came to dote on all those years ago, but life hadn’t been too kind to him with age.
He circled around me, taking in every part of my body. I felt violated. He leaned in close and inhaled my scent. “Hmmm, still smelling good, Princess. You look stunning as always. As you can see, I haven’t been able to spruce myself up that much since leaving the godforsaken hole you put me in all those years ago.”
He circled around me that little bit more as I stood rigid to the spot. I was clutching to my work files like it was the only thing keeping me safe from the terrifying memories having him being so close has resurfaced.
“What do you want, Jaden?” He laughed a little hysterically, but before I knew it, his face was levelling mine and he had the most horrifying look in his eyes.
“I want all those years back that you took from me, bitch. Do you have any idea the shit I’ve been through in that hell hole? All because you wouldn’t play ball that night. Stupid fucking slut.” He spat the last three words out with such venom I could practically taste it on my tongue.
I was determined to not let him see how frightened I was. “You hurt me—and worst still—you hurt my best friends. I hated you for it. I still hate you for it. How can you come here, blaming me for what happened when you and your little shitbags put me and my friends in hospital?”
He grabbed a fistful of my hair and I screamed. I dropped my files and the contents spilt all over the floor.
“You were a fucking little prick tease then and I bet you still are now. You’re a fucking whore of the worst kind and you ruined my life. Now it’s time I ruined yours.”
In that moment I felt my life flash before my eyes. I knew what he came here to do long before he produced the knife.
“Is it still there, my little princess? Did we cut you up enough to leave a nice shiny little scar? Does it twinkle in the light when you’re naked? Does it remind you of that memorable day?”
“Fuck you.” He was behind me now with the knife digging in my back, and an arm wrapped around my neck. I could feel the added bit of pressure—bit by bit—the knife was edging closer to my skin.
“I wish I could stay and chat a little bit more about old times, Angelina, but I have more important things to be doing with my time then standing around talking to a has-been. I’ve gone eleven years without the feel of a woman. Do you have any idea what that does to a guy?” His hand slipped up towards my breast and I tried desperately to fight him off, but he’s grip was too strong, and the knife was too close to my back.
His sick laughter entered my ear and the sound brought another unwelcome memory back to haunt my head. I snapped—pulling my leg up as high as I could—I crashed the heel of my shoe into his foot as hard as I could. He let go and I ran, screaming.
Soon, he came crashing into me with such force, it nearly toppled me over. He spun me around and punched me in the face, blood dripping all over the pavement. He came at me again, this time punching me in the stomach and kicking me in the back. The wind was taken out of me so much that I didn’t see it coming—the knife.
He came at me like a man possessed. I could see the madness in his eyes as he charged at me. I could hear people’s screams, but I knew it was too late. I knew this was the day that Angelina Bradshaw would die—never being able to tell the one man she let in her heart, just how much she loved him.
Everything happened so quickly, it was hard to digest it all at first. Jaden was there one minute and the next he was on the floor of the pavement being pummelled over and over again by a raging Seth. Screams could be heard again, but I didn’t know if the sounds were coming from me or the now onlookers who came to have a peak at what was happening.
Soon, realisation of just how enormous this situation is kicks in. I knew that Seth was after his blood, and if I didn’t stop him now, he was going to kill him.
“Seth!” I shouted. At first it seemed he didn’t hear me,
and just kept going. “Seth, please,” I begged—and finally he looked up. When he saw me and the state I was in, he pushed an unconscious Jaden to the floor and came rushing over.
“Angelina, you’re bleeding badly.” I stared at him in shock. I still couldn’t believe what had just transpired here. Lots of eyes were now staring at us as the sound of sirens were now filling our ears from a distance.
Seth handed me a tissue and held me in his arms. Immediately, I felt safe again.
The police and ambulance soon arrived and they come rushing forth to help Jaden. “Don’t fucking help that monster, help Angelina, she’s bleeding! He did this to her!” His anger radiated all over the street forcing everyone to look our way.
“Calm down, sir,” a policeman shot back. “We need to know what happened here. Miss, can we get someone to have a look at you? It looks like you may have a broken nose.”
I nodded my head, shaking somewhat as the shock started kicking in. I could see a couple of officers talking to the people standing by. I wondered how much of it they really saw. All of it seemed a blur. The only thing—or person I was focused on the whole time, was Jaden.
I looked over to him one last time, but started shaking uncontrollably. Seth had to tighten his grip round my arms so that I wouldn’t lose control. He led the way for me towards the second ambulance, which had now turned up, but my state of mind had me in a sudden panic.
“He hasn’t hurt you, has he?” I searched him all over for any signs that he might be cut or injured in any way. I was almost hysterical with it.
“Angelina, calm down. I’m fine. It’s you that needs to be looked at.”
I managed to relax a little as we neared the ambulance, but then I heard his voice.
“Bitch! I’m gonna fucking get you for this, and your fucking arsehole boyfriend. Has she let you fuck her yet?” His voice was full of anger, but then he suddenly started laughing hysterically.
I stiffened in Seth’s arms and could feel his release as he tried to charge towards Jaden. I managed to grab his arm and scream his name before it was too late. Seth’s eyes were venomous as he looked over at him.