Her cheeks hurt from smiling so big. The man definitely had a wicked sense of humor that tickled her funny bone. I wonder what other wicked things he could tickle me with.
Whoa! Down, girl. Focus.
Clearing her throat, she said, “That was quite possibly the best proposal in the history of proposals.”
He quirked an eyebrow. “Is that a yes?”
“Yes,” she said. “It is definitely a yes.”
Chapter Six
April 1st
Conference rooms weren’t designed with one’s comfort in mind. Physical comfort, sure. The long cherry wood table was flawless and smooth. The leather chair hugged her ass like it’d been designed just for her with a cushy place to support her aching head and perfectly positioned, ergonomic rests for her arms.
But mental comfort was a different thing entirely. Nothing about the room Sophie and Xander currently waited in said kick back and chill for a while. It was sterile and stiff, with abstract art on the walls that attempted to convey a sense of modern flair and expensive taste, but just made her feel uncomfortable and on edge. Even the gigantic ficus plant in the corner looked like it wouldn’t dare move a single leaf from its original position at the time of purchase.
Basically, conference rooms really, really sucked.
Also? April Fools’ Day. Yeah.
How fitting that today of all days was her emergency hearing where she had to convince a judge that her sham of a marriage was exactly the opposite. If she pulled it off, it would be the biggest April Fools’ joke ever. Then again, she wasn’t sure the joke wasn’t already on her.
In the span of a week, Sophie had gone from being perpetually single to suddenly married, owner of her own business to potentially jobless, and a law-abiding citizen to an active participant in marriage fraud.
Her life was officially a clusterfuck.
Every muscle in her body was tensed as though preparing for impact while she repeatedly turned the ring on her left hand. Not wanting to waste a ton of money on unnecessary wedding bands, they’d opted for the silicone kind. They were inexpensive and practical where Xander’s job was concerned. He’d chosen a platinum finish for himself and a slim jade one for her. She kind of loved it and had already decided she’d wear it on her right hand when this was all over. It was a gift—conditional and necessary, though it may be—from Xander and it would serve as a reminder about the time she did something crazy to stand up for herself and what was rightfully hers.
She glanced over at Xander sitting next to her. He was sexy as hell in his suit. She wondered how often a cage fighter needed to wear something so expensive. She wasn’t an expert in men’s fashion, but she could tell the difference between a department store suit and one made of fancy material that had been custom tailored to fit his muscular physique to perfection. The man looked decadently edible.
But not only did she appreciate his suave appearance, she admired the confidence and strength he exuded. He reclined in the black leather chair looking for all the world like he was waiting on takeout but wasn’t particularly hungry.
“No BFD,” she muttered under her breath.
“What’s that?” He turned those crazy beautiful eyes on her and struck her mute. Of course he wore a blue dress shirt that made his eyes look like jewels taken from the Mediterranean Sea. “Soph? You say something?”
“I said you look like this is no BFD.”
“Sorry, you’ll have to translate. American acronyms aren’t my strong suit.”
“Big Fucking Deal,” she whispered. “You look like you don’t have a care in the world. Like we’re not in danger of you-know-what if we can’t you-know-what the you-know-who.”
Inappropriate amusement spread across his handsome face as he leaned over so close that if she tilted her chin up an inch, their lips would meet. “Sophie, you know they don’t have the room under surveillance, right? They’re not watching and listening in.”
Jesus, she hadn’t even thought of video cameras. Wringing her hands in her lap, her eyes darted around the room looking for evidence of tiny hidden lenses. Unfortunately, the government didn’t use anything conspicuous like nanny-cam teddy bears. “Yeah, sure. That’s what they want you to think.”
“Well then, we’d better make this good.” Before she even had a chance to bring her gaze back to Xander, he cupped her face with one rough hand and kissed her.
Her body tensed in surprise and her knee-jerk reaction was to pull away, but his long fingers threaded into her hair and pressed on the back of her head, denying her escape. But it only took a moment before her tension dissolved beneath his sensuous lips. He kissed her again and again, as though each kiss laid claim to a different part of her mouth, and yet he didn’t push for more.
And she really wanted more.
Grabbing the lapels on his suit jacket Sophie pulled him in closer and opened her mouth. Xander answered her silent plea. He closed his fist tight in her hair, creating a delicious sting at her scalp as he thrust his tongue against hers with a groan that vibrated all the way to her sex.
The heavy conference room door opened. They released each other and bolted to their feet like teenagers caught by their parents. Xander cleared his throat and tugged his jacket back to center while Sophie smoothed her hands down her pencil skirt. A brief glance in Xander’s direction confirmed her eighteen-hour lipstick lived up to its claims. When she got home, she was giving it a five-star review on Amazon. And buying a lifetime supply.
“Well,” the gorgeous redhead, Vanessa Maris, said with a smile, “if the judge wants proof by way of a demonstration, I think we’ll have nothing to worry about.”
Xander’s face broke into a huge smile and met Vanessa at the head of the table. “Hello, Nessie,” he said, bringing her in for an affectionate hug. “It’s so good to see you.”
“Same to you, handsome.”
Sophie noted how it did not bother her that the two were tossing out endearments for each other, and how not territorial she felt seeing a beautiful woman, who knew her fake husband better than Sophie did, pressed up against him in a tight embrace. Yep, no jealousy here. Good thing she was a mature—
Oh no she didn’t! Vanessa had ended the hug with kissing him smack on the lips. Maybe not right on the lips. More like the corner. Or just baaaaarely off to the side. Whatever, the point was that she couldn’t go around kissing men all willy-nilly like that.
Since Vanessa was helping them pro bono, Sophie rolled her lips inward between her teeth so she wouldn’t blurt out something she’d regret. Bonus points for not going ape shit.
“Sorry I couldn’t meet with you guys beforehand. I had an emergency call from a client and didn’t have time to swing by.”
“Please, no need to explain,” Xander said. “We’re grateful for your help. I’m sure you’ve guessed this gorgeous creature is Sophie.”
Vanessa held her hand out and chuckled. “Yes, I had a hunch when I saw your tongue down her throat. Nice to finally meet you, Sophie.”
Sophie stood tall and pushed her shoulders back, firmly shaking the woman’s hand in a silent show of strength and confidence. She heard Grams’s words from when Sophie was younger. Caldwells don’t pull their punches, sugarplum. If you let others know right from the start that they can’t walk on you, you’ll never even have to prove it to them.
“It’s a pleasure, Ms. Maris.” Real subtle, Soph. Doubt she forgot her married name. “Xander speaks very highly about you. And your husband.” Somebody shoot me, I can’t stop!
Vanessa’s smile grew, hinting at suppressed amusement. “Please, call me Vanessa. After all, you married this knucklehead, so that makes us family.”
Sophie frowned. “Family?”
Xander started making his way back to their side of the table. “Not by blood. We’re sort of a band of misfits. Aiden—my friend that I told you goes by Irish—”
“And who is married to my little sister and expecting their firstborn next month,” Vanessa added, excitement ch
anging her face from shrewd attorney to anxious auntie.
“Right, well he’s the only one of us who still has a parent living he’s on good terms with.” Xander reached Sophie’s side and all three of them lowered into the plush seats. “Mrs. O’Brien’s a great woman and considers all of us as hers now, but she lives in Boston.”
“So basically it’s just us: Reid and Lucie, me and Jackson, Irish and Kat, and last but not least,” she smiled at Xander, “our seventh wheel, here.”
“Ah, but I’m not the odd man out anymore, Nessie. Now it’s me”—Xander looked away from Vanessa and chucked her lightly under the chin—“and Sophie.”
“That’s right,” Vanessa said, “and we take care of our own, so there was never a question of whether I’d help.”
“Except that this isn’t—” Sophie nervously glanced around the room again for signs of courthouse spies, then lowered her voice to a whisper as a precaution. “This isn’t even real.”
Xander pinned her with a look of assurance and laced the fingers of one hand with hers. “As far as the rest of the world is concerned, it is real until we say different. Yeah?”
She nodded and gave his hand a quick squeeze of thanks. “Yeah.”
“Okay, so here’s the thing,” Vanessa said in a no-nonsense attorney voice. “Your uncle has a hard-on for selling your grandmother’s property. He’s going to fight this marriage tooth and nail in order to keep the trust and make the deal.”
Sophie nodded. “I figured as much.”
“I won’t bore you with all the back and forth legalese, but in laymen’s terms, I said he has no proof you’re not in love and in a legitimate committed relationship, and he called bullshit. He said you had no qualms about breaking the law and mentioned your juvenile years as testament of the truth.”
Oh shit. How many times had Grams warned that her reckless actions would come back to bite her in the ass? “I thought juvie records got sealed when you became an adult.”
“They do, which is why he can only hope that bringing it up influences the judge’s decision indirectly. Normally, judges get pissed when someone tries to sway them with bullshit, but guess who’s golfing buddies with the honorable Judge Johnson? Whose first name, sadly, is not Dwayne.”
“Christ,” Xander muttered, leaning back in his chair. “That’s it, then. Over just like that.”
Vanessa gave him a dramatically wounded look. “I’m hurt you don’t have more faith in me. I’m called Viper in the courtroom for a reason, my little British crumpet. Your talents are fighting and looking pretty. Since I don’t see a cage anywhere, I’d appreciate it if you focused on doing the latter, m’kay, sweet pea?”
Sophie smiled wide and crossed her arms in satisfaction. “Oh, I like her.” And she did, now that she’d given the woman more than thirty seconds before unsheathing her claws. Feeling his gaze on her, she looked over at Xander. “What?” she asked innocently.
His eyes tracked between the women and then settled on Sophie. “I think I liked it better when you didn’t.”
Like the mature adult she was, Sophie stuck her tongue out at her faux beau before turning her attention back to Vanessa. “So what did Judge Not Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson rule?”
“He couldn’t blatantly ignore my arguments and the lack of proof, but clearly he didn’t want to shut his buddy out completely, either.” Vanessa took some papers out of her briefcase and gave them each a copy. “This states that you both agree to return in six months to be evaluated by the court as proof this wasn’t a fraudulent attempt to collect the trust under false pretenses.”
Sophie’s jaw unhinged. “Six months?” When they’d come up with this crazy marriage plan to thwart her uncle’s hostile takeover, she’d assumed it would be a couple of weeks, a month at most. But six months was longer than most Hollywood marriages lasted.
Xander’s strong hand lightly massaged the back of her neck, helping her to stay calm. “Relax, gorgeous. Focus on the end game. The one where we stick it to Caldwell and you get to keep your grandmum’s legacy.”
“You’re right.” Blowing out a deep breath, Sophie said, “Okay, so that’s it, then? We hold off the divorce for six months, the court verifies it, and then we’re in the clear?”
“Yes and no,” Vanessa said. “During the course of the six months, you’ll need to live as a true married couple. That means moving in together, being seen together, the whole shebang.”
Sophie wasn’t sure what Vanessa said after the “live as a true married couple” part. Her brain had snagged on that tiny detail and couldn’t move on. Apparently, Xander had no such problem.
“Do we need to provide bed sheets with her virginal blood as well? Or will they be asking to witness the consummation themselves to be absolutely sure?” His words were pointedly ridiculous and meant as a joke, but his tone held an underlying menace. He wasn’t amused by this in the least.
This was too much to ask of him. His gain in this venture was mild compared to hers. It might be a pain, but he could relocate the gym and his business would be up and running again in no time. All the tenants would be compensated handsomely. They could choose to relocate, too, or even retire. She was the only one who was holding on for dear life for sentimental reasons. She couldn’t put him out to this degree. It wasn’t fair.
“Xander, I’m sorry,” Sophie said, turning to face him. “I knew this was a bad idea from the beginning, but never did I think it would get this out of hand. Don’t worry about it, okay? I’ll be fine.”
Piercing blue eyes narrowed as he leaned in close. “Who said I was worried about anything, and what do you mean by saying you’ll be fine? O’course you’ll be fine. That’s why I’m here, to make sure you are fine and your uncle is not. At least not where you or your bakery is concerned.”
“You can’t possibly intend to go on with this,” she argued.
“Why is that again?”
“Because it’s— You can’t— Ugh. Think about it, Xander. We barely know each other and you think we can simply shack up together for half a year like it’s a walk in the park?”
“I am thinking about it, Sophie. I know you a lot better than you think. And I bet if you stopped and thought about it, you’d realize you know me better than you think, too. That’s not to say we don’t still have plenty to learn, but that’s how all relationships start out, so it’s not as if we’re breaking new ground. As for living together, it might take a little getting used to, but we’re both busy people so it’s not like we’ll be up each other’s arses all day and night.” Suddenly a smile broke out on his face. “Though, if you’d like me up your arse, I’m happy to accommodate you in that as well.”
Both women scolded him with his own name simultaneously, making the brute laugh despite himself. “There now,” he said, holding her chin with his thumb and side of his finger. “That’s the Sophie I like to see. Full of fire and spirit. No more defeatist thoughts, and stop trying to spare me from everything. You may not have noticed—and if not, please let me know so I can rectify the matter—but I’m a big boy. If I want out of something, I’ll tell you, yeah?”
“Yeah,” she whispered.
He gave her a wink and then spoke to his friend. “We can’t thank you enough for helping us with this, Nessie.”
“You can thank me by coming to visit us soon. Irish is clearly going into Daddy panic mode, but if anyone even hints that he doesn’t have his shit together, he becomes a raging Hulk. I think you’re the only one who can get him to decompress before he blows. And if I have to console my sister because Irish throws himself into a volcano, I’m going to be seriously pissed.”
Xander chuckled and promised to call his friend and tell him he’d come out as soon as he could. They all chatted while Sophie and her new husband signed the papers agreeing to the six-month trial sentence. Then they said their good-byes and went their separate ways. Vanessa to the airport, and Sophie and Xander to her tiny apartment. Their agenda for the night suddenly required a wh
ole lot of moving things from one side of the street to the other. Joy.
…
Xander set the box down in his bedroom with a relieved grunt. He and Sophie had been moving her clothes and things from Sophie’s apartment across the street all evening. They’d decided on his flat because it was bigger, but his square footage was drastically shrinking from Sophie’s wardrobe.
The woman had several dozen pairs of high heels alone and insisted they all needed to be brought over. “This is six months we’re talking here. One hundred and eighty-three days,” she’d said. “If I only bring some over then they’ll get worn down and expire before their time, and my other pairs will think I don’t love them anymore. It’s neglect and abuse either way you look at it.”
At that statement, he’d looked at her like she’d lost the plot. But he supposed everyone had their weaknesses, and apparently hers was expensive footwear.
“That’s the last of it, then,” he called out. “You are officially moved into the James residence.”
Sophie appeared in the doorway of his walk-in closet where she’d been hanging up and organizing her wardrobe. Since most of his attire was all for the gym, his regular clothes took up almost no space at all. Now his closet looked like a mini Neiman Marcus.
“You mean James-Caldwell residence,” she corrected.
“Right, because you didn’t take my last name. Why was that again?” Their wedding was kind of a blur for both of them. They each remembered bits and pieces, but for the most part they’d been utterly shitfaced and most of the night’s memories eluded them. Kristin and Billy, their official witnesses, remembered even less than they did.
She shrugged as she crossed to the bed and sat while folding a shirt. “Probably because there’s no point in changing it when I’d just have to change it back in six months.”
“Well, you wouldn’t have to,” he said, taking a seat beside her. “It wouldn’t bother me if you kept it, I’m sayin’.”