“His name is Jason,” Tyler said. “I met him at the safe house on Rockdale. His sister’s been hiding out from this Vampire creep who maimed her. It seems he likes his blood to spurt from an open wound. He cut off her finger to achieve it.”
My eyes flashed, but Tyler couldn’t see them past my sunglasses. She knew what I was thinking, though.
“Don’t worry,” Tyler said. “I already took care of him. I didn’t kill him, but he’ll never grow his right hand back.”
I nodded my approval.
“Well, Jason just recently joined our kind”—“our kind” being a willing blood donor. Tyler smiled., “I’ve never met anyone who reminds me so much of myself.” She glanced at me. “I just mean that we think alike, we want the same things.” She chuckled. “And he’s fucking sexy.”
I could see what was coming next, and I waited patiently.
“Kim, we want you to make him one of your regular donors,” Tyler said. “I know that you don’t like taking blood from too many donors because of the whole lust thing, but it’s something Jason and I want.”
“Tyler, you know what the risks are,” I said. “I haven’t had a true male donor since Paul and … The lust was immediate with us. It happened with Alexis and it happened with Tony. How do you know it won’t happen with Jason?”
Tyler smiled. “Kim, why do you think I want you to take his blood?”
“I don’t understand,” I said, and I didn’t.
“It’s fucking sexy with you,” Tyler said, “but neither of us are lesbians so we can’t do anything about it.”
I laughed and then howled until we were both breathless with laughter. “Oh shit, Tyler. What if Jason gets the hots for me?”
Tyler wiped away tears of laughter and checked her finger to make sure her eyeliner hadn’t smudged. “Kim, he probably will a little, but honestly … who doesn’t? It has nothing to do with being gay. You’re a succubus Vampire, and there’s always some sexiness to it. But we’re going to channel it at each other. Jason isn’t new at this, and he knows that if you agree to do this he’s going to get the best fucking rush. He understands that it’s succubae, and he’s not going to get it confused. If he does, I’ll kick him to the curb. Literally.”
I tilted my head at her. “You know I’m not going to say no. Of course I’ll drink your boyfriend’s blood.” My un-life was definitely not boring.
She nodded and removed her choker. “You have a Council meeting tonight?”
I rolled my eyes. “Yeah,” I grunted.
We both stood. Tyler tilted her head to expose the long line of her neck. I placed my hands on her shoulder and put up a mental wall to shield me from unwanted feelings or sensations. Vampires could do this naturally, but being a Third, I had to learn this talent in a different way.
Paul, my confidante, my protector, and my friend taught me the trick. It works really well for me. But Paul was not someone who I wanted to think about when I was trying not to think about lust.
I concentrated on Tyler’s neck. I first sensed and then saw the pulse there. Hers always beat rapidly. My teeth lowered because I had the desire to eat. And there lies the source of the control. You didn’t really make the teeth do what you want. It was like looking at your hand and saying “flex.” You had to have a desire that would bring the teeth, like a desire to eat, a desire to fight, or a desire to intimidate. That was the big secret that took me so long to understand.
When my teeth dropped, I drooled. I know it was undignified, but it was necessary. It was what gave Tyler and any of my donors the rush. The more I wanted it, the deeper the rush. Of course when any tender and succulent neck was right beneath me, I always wanted it.
My belly twisted in a desire to be filled with her hot fluid. I bit cleanly. Tyler’s shoulders went limp immediately. She was like a crackhead who had taken her first hit. Not that I’m trying to pass judgment. I was worse. I was a starving person who had a feast set before her.
Her blood squirted into my mouth in a thin, fast, stream. I felt myself awaken and become more alert. Feeding made me stronger.
Tyler’s breath came out in a fast huff. She was going to have to sit down after this one. What could I expect? She was only a human. When I took blood from Tony it always knocked him off his feet—of course I never had to shield with him.
I concentrated on what I was doing and stopped thinking about my boyfriend, which isn’t a good idea when you’re trying not to feel lust. My fists had been gripping the material of her shirt, and I relaxed them. I could feel myself tightening down low, and I relaxed there, too. It was a lot of work doing this with women. I had to make sure that it didn’t turn into some porn movie.
I could sense when I needed to stop, the way the pulse slowed. I pressed my tongue to the marks, exploring it until I no longer tasted the coppery, sweetness of an open bite. Like a puppy greeting his owner, I lapped at her neck. I’d learned to do this for my humans to stop the bruising, although Tyler was souped up enough that her body healed any bruising quickly on its own.
Tyler giggled. She always did when I licked her neck. Yeah. I’m not completely human anymore, so it’s not as freaky to me as it may seem to someone else.
We both plopped down. She threw her head back and closed her eyes to enjoy the rush. I grinned and watched her, shaking my head. Even though I bite Tyler—and believe me, it feels and tastes damn good—I don’t really know what she’s feeling. You see, there’s only one other Vampire with Succubae that I know and it’s Tige, my sire. Even when I was healing he avoided feeding me because two succubae together would be … well, Tige and I will never find out how powerful it could be between us.
You’re always a little bit in love with the one who turns you. Normally you would stay with your sire, who would feed, teach, and help you to control your bloodlust. I never had bloodlust. I had sexual lust, and Tige wasn’t around to help me control it. He was on the run because he was to be put to death as a Rogue. My desire to protect Tige was overwhelming. I won’t lie and say that it was all because of our bond. Even as a Vampire, I hurt. I had to give up my human family, and I had become some damned thing forced to live on human blood. I wanted out as much as I wanted to save him, so the choice seemed clear.
But even Tige didn’t want me to relinquish my life for his.
Rehashing these memories caused a lot of buried emotions that I had buried so deeply to resurface. I unconsciously rubbed my hands together and wished for my gloves to cover the sensitive skin. My clothes were like armor over me. They were my security as well as my protection.
“You look so sad,” Tyler said.
I glanced at Tyler and forced a smile. “Sometimes I am.”
“But why? You have everything. You have the most successful territory in all the United States—probably the world. Other Councils are copying the safe house idea. You have a fine-ass boyfriend, you’re a Council member, and nobody is trying to kill you.”
I shrugged. “I really don’t know.”
“Is it Alexis?”
The smile was still on my face when I burst into tears. I covered my face in shame. In the year since I had last seen Alexis, I’ve never cried over him. It devastated me, hurt me, left me confused, and I’ve agonized, but one thing I’m proud to say is that I had never cried—until now.
Tyler pulled me into her arms. “Honey, shhh. I didn’t know that your feelings for him were so deep. I didn’t know.”
“I don’t know what I feel for him,” I croaked, embarrassed. I was the Master. I was supposed to be the strong one. I pulled out of her arms. I didn’t want my tears on her because my tears were made of blood.
She pulled me back to her, and I was thankful. “Kim …”
“I thought Alexis loved me.” I then told Tyler about the place Alexis took us to in the spirit world while my punishment was taking place in the real world. I described the little beach house nestled between the rocks on that beautiful, isolated beach. I described how he picked me up to carry me acro
ss the threshold by making up some story about how the rocks were sharp. I described how he had returned us to a completely human state while we were in the spirit world, how he revealed that we were married, and how he told me he was in love with me. He had even told me something that I wasn’t ready to admit—that I was in love with three different men, but no one man had to possess me. I was my own master, and it was my decision if I wanted to be with one, two, or all three. I told Tyler about the months of playing in the ocean and barbecues on the beach and making love in front of the fireplace. I told her how he cooked breakfast for me and taught me to love scrambled goat brains and eggs. In the spirit world, Alexis and I weren’t Vampires. We were humans who ate, went to the bathroom, and needed to brush our teeth.
“In our little world together, I was the happiest that I’d ever been and I loved him so desperately. So how could he just turn his back on me?” More blood tears welled into my eyes, and I removed my sunglasses.
Tyler just stared at me with wide eyes.
“I look at myself and think that he’s no longer interested in me because I’m not the same woman,” I said. “I just thought … I thought it was deeper than some burn scars.” I wiped my eyes, and Tyler’s eyes were still wide and staring. “Tyler?” Why was she looking at me like that?
“He didn’t leave you, sweetie.” She stood and turned away.
My face went from question to awe to question again. “What are you talking about?”
“Tony is going to fucking kill me.”
I stood on shaky legs. “No one’s going to kill you—except me if you don’t tell me what the hell you’re talking about.”
“Alexis is being punished.”
“Oh God.” My breath came out in a loud rush, and I sat heavily into the chair. “God, no.” I stared at her. “What? Why?”
She threw up her hands. “No one knows except maybe the Council. We found out by accident when Malarias was assigned to the Council in place of Alexis. It was Kaniji who said Alexis was getting what he deserved.”
“But what does that mean?”
Tyler shook her head. “Monica asked Tony where Alexis was. Tony never answered her. He just said that you were in no condition to save the world.”
I stood. I felt cold. Out of respect, I had never asked Tony where Alexis was. But I called him and called him and Alexis never came. One time I followed the link that he had created in us. He saw me coming and turned to look at me. Then he turned away and shut a door cutting us off. After that I blocked my links to him.
I felt sick. I felt as if the blood I’d just ingested was going to come back up. I looked at Tyler. I cradled her face. “Thank you. Thank you, Tyler. I will never tell anyone that you told me this.” I hugged her, turned around, and whispered, “You might want to leave now.”
I could sense her spike of fear because I was in her and she was in me.
“Kim …”
“Get out!” I screamed. “Get everyone out!”
Tyler ran out of the room.
I felt the duster tighten across my shoulders. I have never felt a rage like this. A red haze covered my eyes and a thudding assaulted my ears.
I pulled the duster off and tossed it on the chair. My teeth were turning into fangs. My hands were balled into tight fists. I felt my nails dig into my palms until my hands dripped blood.
I threw my head back and screamed. I screamed over and over until my own ears hurt. It was primal and animal, but it was also demon and destructive. When the rage wouldn’t be contained inside the screams, my shoulders tightened even more and I felt myself hunch over. I was turning.
I had turned into a monster.
I had seen it happen to Alexis and to a limited degree to Tony when they were enraged. Now it was happening to me. I kept screaming and distantly I could hear Monica and Karen trying to come into the room.
I’m pretty sure I would have killed them if they did.
Tyler must have had a hold of them, and she was stronger than both of them combined. I could hear her tell them what she had told me about Alexis.
I dug my claws into the wingchair nearest me and threw it against the wall until it shattered like a house of matchsticks. With superhuman speed I ran around the room striking and throwing and smashing anything in my reach, howling and screaming.
When I sensed that the house was empty I stormed out of the room and unleashed my rage on everything in my path as I headed out the door. I wanted to be outside, to find something to rip and to shred.
I decided to find Tony.
CHAPTER 3
I zeroed in on Tony and found him at the suburban home of Gigi, one of his blood donors. I had never met Gigi, who Tony said was sixty-two and divorced, but she was about to meet me.
Since I had learned to block my pain and yearning from those whom I loved, I could sense Tony without him sensing me. I knew Tony had recently fed and was relaxed.
Tony was about to become un-relaxed.
Claw ready, I materialized beside him in a blandly suburban living room filled with Ikea furniture and slapped him, slashing his face.
Tony flew back off a puke green couch, and Gigi—who was only about thirty, braless, and drop-dead gorgeous!—started screaming.
“You told me she was sixty-two, you lying sack of shit!” I howled, baring my teeth.
“She is, baby,” Tony said, jumping to his feet. “I swear.”
“Liar!” I roared.
I leaped over the couch and lunged for him, clawing him cleanly in the chest and snapping my fangs inches from his throat. He blocked me with a forearm and held my head away from him with his hand. I screamed as my fangs met nothing but air, and it was really pissing me off.
Tony sent me flying backwards over the couch. He looked down at the claw marks on his chest. “I liked this shirt,” his voice sounded incredulous.
I picked up and threw the couch against a puke green loveseat. “I hate it!” I leaped at him again, but this time he caught both of my wrists and held me fast.
“Kim!” he shouted.
The crucifix slipped out during the struggle, and Tony grimaced with a growl and turned away. I kneed him in the balls, and though he doubled over, he still held on to my wrists.
Gigi, the wench, sneaked over and ripped the crucifix from my neck.
Stupid, stupid move.
I twisted out of Tony’s grip and leaped for Gigi’s throat.
Tony snatched and held the back of my neck, squeezing tender skin that split and bled. As I struggled, blood ran in streams down my back, which only enraged me into more bucking and writhing. Tony then clamped down on the back of my neck with his teeth while his arms held me tight against chest.
While Gigi sobbed—probably over the damn furniture—I continued to struggle, but every time I moved, Tony bit me harder, my blood flowing over my shoulders and trickling between my breasts. I felt my legs weakening, my eyelids fluttered, and my breathing slowed as the rage died away. Tony removed his teeth from the back of my neck, and I wilted to the floor.
He squatted down and began to lap at the blood on my neck; healing the wound.
I tensed and tried to get away from him.
He sank a knee into my back. “Gigi, get out of here!” Tony barked.
Gigi ran out of the room.
“Get off me!” I howled.
“No.”
“You fucking lied!” I growled.
“I didn’t lie,” Tony said. “Gigi is sixty-two. She became my donor when she was thirty.”
“You didn’t tell me the entire truth then, you lying son-of-a-bitch!” I raged.
When the front door of the house slammed shut, Tony removed his knee from my back. “What the hell just happened, Kim?”
I sat up and leaned against the mangled couch. “I got you good, didn’t I?” Tony’s face was slashed from his temple to his lip. His skin was angry and raw, and blood streamed from it.
Tony fell back onto what was left of the loveseat, wiping his lips with th
e back of his hand. “Yeah, you did. For no apparent reason.”
“You know why I’m pissed,” I said.
“Because of Gigi?”
My eyes were flaming red. “I’m pissed because you lied. Again. Where is my husband, Tony?”
He blinked.
“Where is he?” I demanded. “Where’s Alexis?”
Tony shook his head.
“Don’t lie to me anymore.”
“I never lied to you about Alexis,” he said.
“You let me believe that he had abandoned me,” I said. “That’s not a lie?”
“No, it’s not. Not when going to him was an impossibility. You were a lump of melted flesh! What were you going to do?”
“Whether I go to him or not is none of your business! Alexis is my business, and whatever needs to be done is my decision to make! Now, where is he?”
Tony stood and walked into a nauseatingly bright yellow kitchen.
I leaped to my feet and followed him, wiping my blood on the cheery wallpaper. “Where is he, Tony?”
Tony ran water in the sink, pulled out a dishtowel, soaked it, and dabbed at his wound. “Alexis no more wants to see you hurt again than I do, Kim.”
I yanked the dishtowel from him and wiped the back of my neck. “You’re not going to tell me, are you?”
“No.”
I threw the dishtowel at him. “Why not?”
“I’d rather see you hate me than see you dead.”
I felt a spark of rage, but it subsided. I must have lost a lot of blood. I glared at him. “Then I guess you get your wish.” I swung around and disappeared.
I went home.
My front door was standing wide open, but the house was quiet and still. I shut the door and took appraisal of the damage I’d done. The front room wasn’t so bad, but the living room was trashed. There were a dozen holes in the walls.
I went to my bedroom and slammed the door, shattering the doorframe and then I went to the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. I had lost my sunglasses, and my eyes were red orbs in my head. I tried blinking my eyes rapidly, but they stayed red. Muscles continued to ripple beneath the skin of my face and neck. My neck was bloody, and the flesh was ripped. I covered the wound with my hand and sealed it the best that I could. Alexis could do it with touch …