Page 29 of The Savage Grace

“I know. It’s a lot of work, but we’re getting closer to being ready for the ceremony. And we’ll get James back.”

  “The preparations weren’t the hard part for me. I almost welcome the ceremony because it’s something I can focus on. It’s thinking beyond it that’s so hard. How can I ever hold James again and not burst from guilt, knowing that what happened to him was because I brought the Shadow Kings into our lives in the first place? And I have no idea how I’m going to go back to school, or walk into the parish during one of Dad’s sermons, and pretend to be normal again. The idea of it is just so hard.…”

  I nodded. I’d felt the same things to some lesser degree, but I knew that didn’t really compare to how difficult it must be for him. “You can do it, though. I know you can.”

  He gave the slightest nod and pulled the heavy silo door closed. I hoped my words hadn’t echoed empty in his mind.

  Chapter Thirty-four

  WHERE SOUL MEETS BODY

  FRIDAY NIGHT, TWENTY-SIX HOURS LEFT

  When I pulled into the driveway of our house, I saw Daniel balancing up in the highest branches of the walnut tree. It almost looked like he was trying to reach out and touch the bright yellow moon above him. His head was tipped back, allowing moonlight to bathe his beautiful face. He opened his mouth, and I was almost afraid he was about to send a great howl into the night—but instead, he simply said my name as I approached.

  “Are you okay?” I called up to him.

  “I can feel it,” he said, “the pull of the moon. It calls to me. I remember that from when I was stuck as the white wolf—feeling that undeniable pull, keeping me trapped. The white wolf wants me to heed it again. Wants me to set it free.”

  “I don’t like the sound of that,” I said.

  Daniel dropped his gaze from the moon. “Neither do I.” He pushed off from a branch and jumped from the top of the tree. He landed with barely a sound in the grass in front of me. “I want you to know that when I say I feel the pull of the moon, or the pull of the wolf, I don’t mean it the way you or Jude feel the wolf. It isn’t some terrible voice anymore, trying to drive me to embrace any terrible thoughts. I’m not a danger to you.”

  “I understand that. The wolf that’s inside of you isn’t a demon. It’s a pure Hound of Heaven.”

  “But at the same time, I still have to fight it constantly. It wants me to shed my human form and embrace my natural state.”

  “Are you saying that being the white wolf is your natural state?” I placed my hands on his arms. Heat radiated off his skin, and it reminded me too much of the night he’d spent fighting to stay human. I wrapped my fingers around his elbows, feeling like I needed to hold on to him. Keep him from going away again. “Not this? Not you? Not Daniel?”

  “The white wolf seems to think so.” Daniel returned my gesture, wrapping his own hands around my arms. He tapped his ring finger against my skin. “This is helping,” he said about the moonstone ring on his finger. It was same ring Sirhan had worn, and Gabriel had presented it to Daniel after Sirhan’s death—as a token of the grandfather he’d never really known. “And you’re helping, too. Just being near you gives me the drive to stay in my human form. So I can be with you.”

  “Then you’d better stay as close as you can.” I pulled him against me, embracing him as tightly as I could, even though he radiated enough heat to make me sweat.

  “I’m not going to go wolf at the Challenging Ceremony,” he said. “I’m afraid the draw of the white wolf will be so powerful under the eclipse that I might not be able to fight my way back again.”

  I nodded against his chest, knowing that not going wolf when the other challengers did might put him at a disadvantage. “My money is still on you,” I said. “Even human you.”

  He let out a short laugh. “All my life I wanted to be normal. Now I’ll just settle for having only two legs, two arms, and a human face.”

  “I like your face,” I said, trying to lighten my heart.

  “I like yours, too.” He shifted his head close to mine and kissed me with lips that felt like fire. Our lips melted together until his body convulsed with a great shudder, and I knew he was still fighting the wolf. “Will you stay with me again tonight?”

  “Yes,” I answered, holding him tight.

  “The white wolf is wrong,” he said, and kissed my shoulder. “This right here—you and me together, under this old walnut tree—this is my true natural state.”

  “We always do seem to end up back here,” I said. “It’s comforting.”

  “It’s home,” he said.

  I sighed into his arms, realizing that in a day’s time, I had no idea what home was going to look like anymore. If we failed at the Challenging Ceremony, this family that I’d been fighting so hard and so long to restore—to make whole again—could possibly be torn apart completely. I could lose everyone I loved.

  But if we succeeded … If we got James back … If Daniel and I were to become the alphas of a whole new pack, I still had no idea what home would look like then. Would we be forced to leave Rose Crest to lead the Etlus? Leave my finally reunited family behind?

  SATURDAY MORNING, FIFTEEN AND A HALF HOURS UNTIL THE CEREMONY

  I awoke to rays of sunlight streaming through the seams of the boarded-up front room window. Daniel and I had moved inside when it had gotten too cold for me out under the tree. We’d sat on the front room sofa, tangled in each other’s arms. Daniel asked me to give him a word-for-word retelling of our engagement. “I want to be able to at least pretend I remember it,” he said, but I knew he was looking for something to distract him from his inner battle against the white wolf’s pull.

  I told him stories until the heat of his body cooled, and he fell asleep with his head tucked against my shoulder.

  He stirred next to me now, looking like an angel the way rays of sunlight danced off his golden hair.

  I could hear my family in the kitchen, and the sounds of car doors opening and closing outside. The lost boys’ voices drifted in through the broken window. It sounded like they were loading something large onto the back of Talbot’s truck.

  Daniel yawned and stretched next to me. “What’s going on?” he asked, sounding slightly disoriented by sleep.

  It was Saturday morning. The start of what would probably be the longest day of our lives.

  “It’s beginning,” I said.

  SATURDAY AFTERNOON, EIGHT HOURS TO GO

  Daniel and Jude both chose to forgo Talbot’s battle-training lessons, instead spending the day meditating with Gabriel in the grassy fields on the back acres of the farm. As much as I wanted them ready to fight, I knew it was a smart choice. With every hour that got closer to the sunset, even I could feel the pull of the full moon.

  Lisa must have noticed, as she removed her teardrop moonstone earrings and offered them to me.

  “Are you sure?” I asked.

  “I owe you. I mean, I’m totally hot enough to pull off the one-eared look. But still, I’m grateful I don’t have to.” She gave me a devious smile. “I’ll just have to make sure I don’t go wolf tonight, though. Wouldn’t want to accidentally kill you instead of a Shadow King.”

  “Thanks,” I said. I closed my fingers over the two small stones and kept them locked in my fist all afternoon.

  ONLY TWO HOURS LEFT

  Mom served up a late dinner for everyone, and we spread out in the front yard of the farmhouse, filling our stomachs with as much as we could force ourselves to eat—for energy stores and all that. The way we all sat in small clusters, sharing plates of fried chicken and mashed potatoes, any passerby might assume we were at a family reunion. Only we were preparing for battle, not three-legged races or a water-balloon toss.

  I sat on the front porch with Daniel, my parents, Jude, April, and Charity.

  “Have any interesting plans for tonight?” April asked the group.

  Daniel gave a slight laugh.

  Charity picked up the fried chicken leg from her plate. “James loves thes
e,” she said. “He thinks they’re little microphones. Remember how he’d pick a drumstick and hold it like this and sing ‘Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star’?” Her voice caught, and she put the drumstick back on her plate. She wiped tears from the corners of her eyes.

  I put my hand on her back. “Except he always gets the words wrong,” I said. “And he sings ‘Tinkle, Tinkle, Little Star’ instead.”

  Charity gave a sad smile, but then she started crying harder. “What if they don’t bring him tonight? What if he’s already … ?”

  “We can’t think like that,” Mom said. “He’s coming back to us. I know it. Grace and Jude will bring him home.”

  Jude lowered his head, and I watched as he clutched his moonstone pendant against his chest.

  A few minutes of silence passed. I picked at the chicken on my plate.

  The front door opened, making us all jump at the noise.

  Gabriel stepped out onto the porch.

  I looked up at him.

  “It’s time,” he said. “The others will be here soon. Let us finish preparing.”

  Daniel and I stood and followed him into the farmhouse. The rest of my family followed us, while the Etlu Clan scattered to their various prearranged positions for the ceremony. April picked up two black garment bags from the musty old sofa in the living room. “I thought you two should have robes for the ceremony. Like everyone else,” she said. “I made them myself.”

  “Thank you.” I took the bags and handed the one marked with Daniel’s name to him. I hung my bag over my shoulder and turned to my parents. I pulled the keys to the Aston Martin from my pocket and pressed them into Mom’s hand. “I want you guys to take Charity and April and start driving. Just keep going as far and as fast as you can. Go to Carol’s or Grandma’s. Just someplace far from here. In case something goes wrong.”

  Mom looked at the key and then back at me. “No,” she said. “They’re bringing James here. I can’t take off to some other state. I need to be here for him.”

  “Mom, it’s too dangerous. You can’t be here.…”

  “Meredith,” Dad said, placing his hand on the small of my mother’s back, “how about we drive a few miles down the road, out of harm’s way. Grace can call us as soon as they’ve secured James, and we’ll come for him.”

  Mom thought about it for a moment and agreed. “You won’t come with us?” she asked me. “Even if I beg?”

  “My place is here.”

  She nodded.

  Dad stepped forward and hugged me. He traced a cross on my forehead. “God be with you.”

  Mom and April took turns hugging Jude and me tight, and then they left wth Charity and my dad.

  Brent, Ryan, and Zach came into the entryway. Ryan and Zach held two hunting rifles at their sides—the same ones I’d stolen from those hunters who had tried to kill Daniel.

  Brent held something out to me in a little black pouch.

  “This isn’t another trick, is it?”

  The boys were enjoying staying at a haunted house all too much, and they’d taken to trying to scare people at every turn with whatever leftover Halloween decorations they could find. I’d about lost my soul when Brent lured me up into the hayloft after lunch to show me “something vitally important.” It had turned out to be a giant faux battle-ax, the size of a mountain bike that came swinging out of the ceiling at the press of a button. The stupid thing almost hit me in the shoulder, but the boys had thought the look on my face had been oh-so-funny.

  “It’s an earpiece,” Brent said. “I got it from Sirhan’s spokesperson guy. I’ve got the other one in my ear.” He pointed at it. “That way we can communicate while you’re on the battlefield.”

  “Good,” I said. “You guys know exactly what you’re supposed to do, right?”

  The boys nodded.

  “No mistakes,” I said. “Wait for my signal before you do anything.”

  They agreed and then ran off to take their places upstairs. Their plan for tonight was our secret weapon against the Shadow Kings—but it was also an extremely dangerous plan, and I worried something might go wrong.

  Gabriel put his hand on Daniel’s shoulder. He looked at me. “I’ll give you two a few minutes.”

  Gabriel bowed his head slightly and then went into the kitchen with Jude, leaving Daniel and me alone.

  The second they were out of sight, Daniel pulled me into his arms. He held me for a full two minutes, neither of us saying anything. For a fleeting moment, I wondered if this would be the last time Daniel would ever hold me. Wondered if both of us would survive this night. Wondered if we should say a few last words…

  No, I thought. This isn’t a time for farewells. I refuse to say good-bye.

  A horn honked outside. I glanced out the window. A long procession of cars rolled into the parking field beyond the house.

  Daniel caressed his hands against my face, cupping my cheeks and brushing away with his thumbs the tears I didn’t even know I was crying.

  “This isn’t good-bye,” I said.

  “Never, ever good-bye.” He leaned in and kissed me in a way that reminded me of dark chocolate—both bittersweet and delicious, leaving me wanting more.

  “They are here,” Gabriel called from the top of the stairs. “The first of the challengers have arrived. Daniel, come with me, please.”

  I squeezed Daniel’s hand as he broke away from me, and then I nodded to Gabriel—thankful for the few moments alone with Daniel. I wouldn’t get another chance for that tonight. Not in that challenging ring, surrounded by spectators, come to watch as our futures were determined under the light of the bloodred moon.

  Chapter Thirty-five

  CHALLENGE

  MIDNIGHT

  I walked out onto the back porch of the farmhouse and stood at the edge of the steps in front of the battlegrounds. I tucked the earpiece behind my ear and straightened my moonstone earrings. A cold wind kicked up, tossing my robes around me as I unsheathed my broadsword.

  I’d feared April would have gone with something sparkly with sequins for my ceremony garb, but when I’d zipped open the garment she’d given me, I found a beautiful hand-stitched ceremonial robe the color of a coral reef. Pinkish-orange fabric with a satin sheen—that reminded me all too much of my bedsheets at home.

  I looked out at the boundary of the challenging ring, lit up by torches and the cascading light of the larger-than-life-looking full moon that presided over the battlefield. Only twenty-five minutes remained until the beginning of the eclipse. I prayed we’d be able to stop Caleb and his army before that happened. Otherwise, the moon would turn red, and all hell would break loose. The Etlu clan stood in a circle within the torches, the ceremonial “guardians of the ring,” as Jarem had called them. They held their spears perfectly straight, despite the strong wind that whipped at their jewel-toned robes.

  Beyond the guardians, I saw the silhouettes of figures waiting in the fields outside the ring. I caught the reflection of moonlight glinting in several of their eyes.

  Urbats. Crowds of Urbats.

  At least a hundred total from what I could make out.

  “Are they all here to challenge?” I asked Lisa as I took my place next to her between two torches, unable to hide the worry in my voice. “There’re so many.”

  “Spectators mostly.” She steadied her spear in her hand. “I hope.”

  “Where did they come from?”

  “Everywhere,” she said. “A Challenging Ceremony is one of the few things that will bring Urbat out en masse.” She scanned the crowd. “I count representatives from at least fifteen different packs in attendance. The Oberots sent their alpha and his son all the way from Russia. They wouldn’t have come if at least one of them weren’t planning on making a challenge. They’ve been keen on merging our two packs for quite some time.”

  “Any sign of Caleb?” I scanned the crowd once more, but I didn’t see anyone I recognized. No Akhs or Gelals. No Shadow Kings.

  Lisa shook her head. “
It’s starting.”

  She held her spear and stood at attention, looking toward the barn. Gabriel, in his burgundy robes, exited the barn. A second person followed, dressed in a robe that glistened like it had been spun from actual gold. The hood of the robe hid his face, but I could tell by the way he carried himself that it was Daniel.

  Jarem, next to Lisa, began to hammer the shaft of his spear against the ground. It made little noise itself, but then Lisa and the other spear bearers joined in. Banging, banging, banging their spears against the hardened dirt floor until it sounded like the beat of tribal drums, heralding Daniel and Gabriel into the ring. The two walked in rhythm with the beat until they came to the epicenter of the challenging ring. Gabriel stood on the wooden platform Bellamy had built over the spot where Sirhan died. It was the place where the ceremony was to begin—and end. The winner would be declared from that spot.

  I heard a low murmur from the crowd above the drumming, commenting and speculating as to why Gabriel hadn’t entered the ring alone.

  Gabriel raised his arms. The pounding stopped, and the crowd quieted.

  “I know many of you came this evening believing I, as Sirhan’s beta, would be the prime challenger,” Gabriel said. He spoke loudly, projecting his voice, even though there wasn’t much need in a crowd with superhuman hearing. “However, two nights ago, Sirhan named a new successor. His grandson, Daniel Etlu of the Etlu Clan.”

  At Gabriel’s signal, Daniel lowered his hood. His hair glistened in the torchlight, looking almost as golden as his robes. Three black lines had been painted under each of his eyes, and another black line ran from the top of his forehead to the tip of his nose—the ceremonial markings of the prime challenger, signifying that Daniel was the person to beat in order to be declared the new alpha. They made him look fierce and primal, like a tribal warrior.

  A louder murmur came up from the crowd of spectators. Some wondering why they didn’t know Sirhan had a grandson, others remarking as to how much Daniel looked like Sirhan in his younger years.

  Gabriel raised his voice louder to be heard over the din. “Daniel is more like his grandfather than just in appearance. He is a true alpha.”