“Complicated,” Brett answers for me.
“Exactly.”
When Brett puts my new drink down and takes my old one away, he leans forward and whispers, “He’s staring at you.”
For a fleeting second my head nearly snaps in that direction, but then I told myself I wouldn’t look. “Really?” I whisper back, trying to seem unfazed, but failing miserably.
Brett starts laughing. “Girl, you have it bad.”
I sneer back. “Go suck on a pretzel.”
Brett laughs even harder, so much so he starts grabbing hold of his belly. “Oh, baby. Believe me when I say I’ll be sucking on more than a pretzel later.”
“So that’s the reason why you’re all dolled up, is it? Got a date?”
He nods, with a twinkle in his eyes. “His name’s Coulder.”
“Coulder?” I ask. “What kind of name is that?”
“Hush, I like it.”
I shrug. “Well, as long as he’s not colder on my friend, than it’s all good.”
“Ha, ha, you think you’re funny. But thank you for looking out for me.”
I put my drink up in salute. “It’s what friends are for after all.”
Brett gives me a bright smile before turning to deal with another customer. It’s starting to get busy, so when his helper, Daniel, walks in I can almost feel his sigh of relief.
“Thank fuck,” he mutters under his breath. I start to giggle. I don’t know why. I think it may be the alcohol.
As all of the Friday office workers begin to move in, and I find myself on my own more and more, it gets much harder to avoid looking in Easton’s direction. Again, I can feel him. It’s like his eyes are burning into the back of my head. I have no way of knowing whether he’s looking unless I do. For a few minutes, I stare straight ahead, until it starts to become unbearable. I have to know. Is he looking?
I turn my head.
Yes, he’s looking. In fact, he’s staring at me with an intensity that sends my heart skipping again. I have to look away, but at first I can’t seem to take my eyes off of him. Someone in the bar erupts with cheers and that’s when our eye contact breaks. It’s someone’s birthday and there’s a group out celebrating. The man who had been cheering looks my way. He smiles and naturally I smile back, but then he takes that as an invitation to come over to me.
Great.
“Hi,” he says, taking a seat next to me without asking.
“Hi,” I say back.
“My name’s Simon.”
“Sasha,” I say back and shake his hand.
He points at my drink. “Fancy another drink?”
I shake my head. “No, thanks. I’m good.” I pause a moment and then say, “Out celebrating?”
He nods with a smile. It’s a nice smile. He’s not necessarily what I would call handsome. He is, but he’s not my type. He’s quite skinny and I like my men to have a bit of meat on their bones. His hair’s nice. It’s blond and very clean—shiny even. Maybe under normal circumstances I would have agreed to him buying me a drink, but since the day I met Easton in the bar, there’s only one person I want to buy me a drink. He’s close and yet so far away.
Oh, yeah, and he hates me right now.
“It’s a colleague’s birthday.”
I smirk at him. “So I see.”
I catch him lingering at my lips before he meets my eyes. “My God, you’re beautiful. Has anyone ever told you that?”
I pull my head back slightly on a laugh. “Straight in for the kill.”
“No messing when it comes to what I want, and what I want right now is sitting right next to me looking like the angel that fell from heaven.”
I roll my eyes on a laugh. “I would seriously start to rethink those pick up lines, Simon. They were outdone years ago.”
“Seriously?” he asks, laughing along with me. “I was certain they would work like a charm.”
I shake my head as he comes in closer. “Sorry, buddy.”
“Are you sure I can’t tempt you with a drink?”
A lock of my hair falls forward and I flinch a little when his hand comes up to place it behind my ear. “Sorry, but I have to place that lock behind your ear. You have the most beautiful eyes and your hair’s just hiding them.”
“Sasha. A word, please.”
My head snaps to Easton who’s standing beside us with a look of murder on his face. How long he’s been there, I don’t know, but I suddenly can’t breathe.
“Who are you?” Simon asks with an angry frown.
“I’m none of your business.” He turns to me again and with more urgency, he says, “A word. Now.” Grabbing my hand, he hauls me out from my seat and practically drags me out into the cold. “Put this on,” he orders, offering me my coat.
“Easton, what’s going on?” I ask, as I place my coat on. He then offers me a crash helmet.
“Put this on,” he barks.
Oh shit, he’s mad. I don’t know why. Maybe he’s still pissed about earlier and now wants to have it out with me somewhere private. He could take me to the woods and murder me and no one would know.
“Where did you get this helmet from?” I ask, a little miffed at his sudden rage.
“My friend lent it to me for a while. Just put it on and get on the bike.”
I watch as he places his helmet on his head and throws his leg over a beautiful, expensive looking Harley Davidson. For a moment, I stand there, dumbfounded. What is he playing at?
When I don’t move, he glances my way. “Sasha, get your helmet on now and climb on.”
“I haven’t even paid Brett for my food and drink. You’ve just dragged me out here without a word and now you’re taking me where? What’s going on?”
I hear him sigh from his helmet. “I’ve sorted out payment with Brett myself. Humour me, please and get on the bike before I lose my shit.”
My eyes widen at his sudden outburst, but something tells me in those eyes that he’s desperate for me to go with him. I nod my head, clipping the helmet in place before climbing on behind him. It’s only when he quickly moves that I realise I am on the back of a bike for the first time in all my life, but not only that, it’s with Easton.
My head teacher.
But also the man I have a serious crush on that grows day by day. A man who—right now—is angry at me because I read out that Robert Burns poem. The poem that he texted a verse to that first night we met. The first night we kissed.
My head and my heart are awash with emotions as we zoom around cars and past trees from the busy streets and onto more country roads. I don’t have a clue where we’re going, but I know I can trust him. I have an inkling that he wants to go somewhere private so that he can shout at me for what I did today, but at the present time, all I can think about is the fact that although the ice cold air is hitting my cheeks, the warm glow of Easton’s body is making it all worth it. My arms are wrapped around him tightly, holding onto him for fear that if I loosen my grip, he will somehow disappear.
Just as I’m getting used to being on the bike, Easton suddenly swerves off the road and down this country lane where he stops. With nothing but the bike’s headlights to illuminate the area, I get off, taking in my surroundings. All I can see around me are trees, and all I can hear are the faint sounds of cars going by off the main road. A billow of steam escapes my mouth and evaporates into the air when I take my helmet off and turn to find Easton doing the same.
“What was that?” I ask, gripping the handle of my temporary helmet in my hand.
I watch in silence, my heart hammering against my chest as Easton places his helmet on the seat of his bike and turns to me with what I can only describe as a pained look across his face. “Easton?” I ask again as my stomach begins doing summersaults. “Why did you—”
I have no time to finish that sentence. It takes less than a second for him to cross the path between us and even less than that to cup my face in his hands before his lips crash against my own.
At firs
t, I can’t move. My breath has been sucked up by this man I have been dreaming of kissing ever since the first time I saw him. But then he moans, and my body becomes limp in his arms. The helmet I had been holding crashes to the ground, but neither one of us cares. He encases me, wrapping those same arms around my waist and pulling me in closer as my tongue starts a leisurely dance with his. I’m on fire with his kiss. The feel of his warm body pressed against mine has my head spinning, my heart racing, and my body humming with desire.
Wanting more, I thread my fingers through his hair, gripping the strands tightly in my hands. I hear his growl, and in response, I moan—my breath a whisper against his lips. I feel the hot air from his mouth on my own as well as the slight taste of beer on his tongue. It’s intoxicating.
“Fuck,” he says, pulling away and causing me to groan when I sense the loss of his mouth. He stays still, but his arms are wrapped around me as he places his forehead against my own. I see both of our steamy breaths hitting one another as we try to calm our beating hearts.
“I keep trying, Sasha. By fuck, I keep trying to keep my distance … and failing miserably. Today, when you read that poem, and then that fucker tried to chat you up, I just lost it.”
My heart bursts at his words. “You’re not angry with me?”
Cupping my head in his hands, he pulls my face away, frowning. “Why would I be angry with you?”
“For reading that poem. Afterwards, you never commented. In fact, you wouldn’t even look at me. I thought you were upset with me for choosing that particular one.”
Closing his eyes, he shakes his head. “How could I be? I wasn’t even supposed to be there. After you read it out loud, it took everything I had in me to not drag you out of the classroom and kiss you stupid.”
A huge smile lifts my lips. “Really?”
He chuckles a little before his face turns deadly serious again. “I didn’t like that man talking to you. In fact, I just saw red. I’m sorry.”
Grabbing his coat, I tug him a little. “You did go slightly caveman in there,” I tease.
I see his smile. “I did, didn’t I?”
I bite my lip before admitting, “I kinda liked it.”
Easton raises an eyebrow. “You did, huh?”
I nod. “Yes. It did things to me.”
With a twinkle in his eye, Easton asks, “What things? You know what? On second thought, don’t answer that question. I’m already having a hard time not going caveman on you again and dragging you back to my place.”
Heat. Pure heat radiates throughout my whole body at the thought that Easton wants me just as I want him.
But.
And there’s always a but.
We can’t be.
As if noticing my shift in mood, Easton nods. “I know. It can never happen.” I watch as he closes his eyes and shakes his head. He looks like he’s in pain. When he opens them back up again, he fixes me with those deep brown eyes and says, “You and I, we are like two sides of a coin. Inextricably drawn together, but also pushed in opposite directions.”
Suddenly, I can’t breathe.
And as much as I am falling hard for this man, I have to admit a need to be sensible. It would be so easy to give in to what I feel for him and ask him to take me back to his place, throw caution to the wind, and be done with it. That said, it’s really not so easy because the consequences could—and likely would—be dire for both of us if we ever got caught.
“We have to try and keep apart—for both of our sakes.”
Placing his head on mine again, he grips my hair in his hands and nods. “I know. I don’t fucking like it, but I know.”
“We have Halloween half-term coming up soon. Maybe that will be good for us? A break from each other may help.” I know on my behalf that it’s an out and out lie, but it’s all I can come up with for now.
“You’re right,” he says, letting go of my hair and stepping back. The loss of his contact is a shock to my system. I watch as he bends down retrieving the helmet before offering it to me. “Here, let me take you home. Unless, you need to be somewhere else?”
Sadly, I shake my head. The only place I want to be is with Easton, but I know that if I admit that this night could end up completely different to how it should end.
The sensible end.
With us going our separate ways.
“Don’t you have friends waiting for you at the pub?”
He smirks. The playful Easton is back. “Yes, but they’ll understand.”
“You can take me back there and I can make my own way home. You should get back to your friends.”
Grabbing the helmet that’s in my hands, he places it on my head and fastens it up for me before tapping my head. “As I said, they’ll understand.” Ever so casually, he strolls back to his bike and I watch his beautifully pert bottom in his Levi jeans. I sigh. Right now, I feel ever so jealous of Levi.
“Are you coming?”
Snapping my head up, I realise that he’s now sitting on his bike waiting for me as I stare unashamedly. He notices of course. I can tell by the current smirk on his face.
“Oh, yes,” I answer, practically running towards him.
I climb on behind him and grip on tight to him as he starts the bike. I hear the roar of the engine before he says, “Hold on tight.” His back wheel spins and dust bellows in the air as we race away. Adrenaline spikes and I find myself squealing in joy as we hit the main road and zoom past a BMW.
“You like it?” he shouts from in front of me.
“I love it!” I scream making him laugh.
As we practically fly back to my home, I finally take in everything around me. I feel the wind against my face and I can’t help but close my eyes as I hear the thrum of the bike beneath me. The streets are busy filled with people and taxi’s taking passengers to restaurants and bars, excitement filled in the air at the welcome of the weekend. Me. I know I will be spending my weekend with that kiss in the back of my mind, but right now I’m concentrating on the thrill of this incredible ride, with this incredible man who I currently have my arms wrapped around.
Without thinking, I squeeze my body into him that little bit more and I see when Easton slightly turns his head. “Are you okay back there?”
I can’t help the huge grin on my face when I reply. “Oh, this is more than okay?”
“One you can tick off your bucket list, huh?”
“Oh yeah!” I scream back, making him laugh.
Too soon, he’s turning into the car park outside my block of flats and coming to a stop. Disappointment and sadness soon shrouds the elation I felt seconds ago.
I don’t want this to end.
Regretfully, I lift my leg over and immediately take the helmet off. “Tell your friend thanks for the loan of the helmet.”
Easton lifts his own off and grabs mine from me. “I will.”
I can feel the sudden change in both our moods. It’s a horrible feeling compared to how I felt just seconds ago in his arms. “And thank you for that incredible experience. I loved it.”
He smiles, securing the extra helmet on his handlebar. “You’re welcome. Anytime.”
I still at the word “anytime” and so does he. Neither of us says anything, but I know—as far as I’m concerned—I’m desperate to. I want to scream that I want his mouth on mine, his body pressed against me, skin on skin. I want him on me, inside me, at one with me. Anything I can get from him I want.
But, alas, I can’t say a damn thing. Instead, I smile, say goodnight, and turn to walk back to my flat. I don’t turn around and Easton doesn’t hang around either. As soon as he spots me walk through the door, he speeds away.
And I can’t help wondering if it’s my heart that’s waving right along with him.
Date
When I walk back in the flat, it’s my mother’s laughter I hear before I see them. She’s sat at the dining table, a glass of white wine in hand as she converses—very intimately I may add—with a man I have never seen befo
re. He notices me first, looking up when I walk through the door and smiling a bright smile. As if sensing I’m there, my mum turns to see me, her face flushing like she’s been caught doing something naughty.
“Sasha!” she sings, immediately rising from her chair and rushing over to me. “Come and meet Eric.” She slings her arm through mine and guides me towards Eric. As soon as I’m within reaching distance, he gets up from his chair, straightening his suit out a little before extending his hand.
“Nice to meet you, Sasha. I’ve heard so much about you.”
I look to my mum. I’ve heard nothing about him. “Nice to meet you too,” I say, shaking his hand.
My mum looks at my attire and beams. “Have you been on a date with that nice, young man again?”
My heart drops, but my smile stays in place. “I have—of sorts—but it wasn’t a date.”
“Pffft,” she answers, waving her hand in front of me as she sits down beside Eric again. “I’ve seen the way you two look at each other. There’s no denying something’s there.”
Eric—seeing the expression on my face—says, “Laura, don’t embarrass the girl.”
“Sorry,” she chuckles, placing a hand on top of Eric’s. From the way they are with each other, I can tell whatever this is has been happening for a while now. Why my mother hasn’t told me I have no idea.
“Have you eaten?” My mum eyes me, waiting for my answer.
I nod. “I had something to eat with Brett.” Thinking they would like some privacy, I point to my room. “I’ll go.”
“Don’t be silly,” my mum says. “Come. Sit with us. Would you like a glass of wine?”
I shake my head as I take a seat opposite them. “No, thanks, Mum. I’m good.”
“Laura tells me you’re doing your final GCSE year.”
My eyes trail back to Eric who’s smiling eagerly at me, awaiting my answer. He seems around my mum’s age, good looking with cropped blond hair and bright blue eyes. He has a strong jaw that reminds me of Easton, but in no way does this guy hold a candle to Easton.
I don’t think anyone ever could in my eyes.