Not getting an answer, I moved into the room. Her bed was rumpled, like she had left it in a hurry. The noisy phone was still making that shrill-ass noise on her nightstand. Crossing to it, I lifted it and turned the alarm off.
The bathroom door was cracked open, so I headed for the door, figuring she was just in there, getting ready. I was almost to the door when I heard a groan, followed by the distinct sound of vomit hitting a porcelain bowl.
I didn’t even stop to think about what I was doing before I was running into the bathroom to check on her. The thought of Quinn sick or hurt fucked with my head. I needed to take care of her, make sure she was okay.
I had gotten shit from the first day I had claimed her as my best friend, but I couldn’t have cared less. They could call me a pussy, and it wouldn’t have mattered, as long as they left her alone. If they didn’t, then they would bring down the fires of hell on their heads.
I could tell her anything, and I knew she would take it to her grave. She didn’t judge me, didn’t condemn me. She loved me wholeheartedly, and I loved her right back with everything inside of me.
If I could have fallen in love with her, that would have made my life a hell of a lot easier. Probably for both of us. We could have gotten married, had a few kids, and I could have spent the rest of my life giving her the world, as she deserved. But while I felt like she was the other half of my soul, I didn’t feel anything more for her than an intense affection. It was stronger than what I felt for Raven, but not in the least sexual. She brought me peace when the world was at its darkest.
In the bathroom, I found Quinn on her knees in front of the toilet, her hands holding either side as she continued to vomit into the bowl. She was dressed in her old sleep shirt, and her hair was pulled up into a messy knot that I knew she liked to sleep in. My concern only mounted as I watched her start to dry heave.
I crossed to the sink and pulled out a washcloth from one of the drawers. Dampening it with cold water, I crouched beside her and placed the cloth on the back of her neck.
She jerked as if I had stabbed her and snapped her head up. Her face was pale as death, her eyes bloodshot, and sweat poured down her face, mixing with her tears.
Taking the cloth from her neck, I used it to wipe her face, but the tears only fell faster. Her body was shaking with the effort to remain upright, and I wrapped an arm around her waist, taking her slight weight. She sagged against me, her forehead pressing to my bare chest.
“Are you okay?”
She shook her head, but didn’t speak.
For several long minutes, we stayed like that. I stroked the strands that had fallen from her knot away from her face, offering her the only comfort I could.
She shifted, and I thought it was to get up, so I started to help her. Instead, she groaned like she was dying and buried her head in the toilet again. There was nothing left for her to throw up, so I got her a glass of water from the sink. It took her a little while, but she was finally able to take a few sips to rinse out her mouth.
For the next ten minutes, I stayed with her. When it seemed like she was finally done, I carried her back into her bedroom and tucked her under her covers. She curled onto her side, burying her face in one of the pillows.
“Feeling any better?”
She shrugged one shoulder, staying quiet as the tears once again flowed down her cheeks like twin rivers.
“I’m going to call Raven.” I picked up her phone since mine was still in Kelli’s room and started to hit my sister’s number.
“Don’t bother,” Quinn croaked in a voice that was painful from all the vomiting she had done.
“You’re sick, Quinnie. Maybe she can recommend something to help soothe your stomach.”
“I’m not sick,” she whispered, the tears flowing faster.
“Are you mental?” She was still deathly pale, her lips were dry and cracked, colorless. She looked like she was miserable and would need to bolt to the bathroom again at any time. “You have a stomach bug or something, honey. If Raven can’t help, then I’ll call Doc. He can stop by and check you over.”
She shook her head. “No. This isn’t a bug. I’ll be fine in a little while. It usually passes by noon.”
“Usually?” I parroted, my concern for her escalating. “You’ve been sick like this recently?”
Another shrug. “For about a week or so now.”
“For fuck’s sake, Quinnie. You have got to see Doc.” I was already dialing his number with her phone, but before I could hit connect, she reached out and took it from me. “You need medicine. And tests. It’s not normal for someone to be this sick for so long.” Fear for her was starting to choke me.
Christ, I had faced down bullets flying past my head with no fear. Had gone toe-to-toe with men twice my size, twice as mean, yet the thought of something happening to this female terrified me like nothing else. I couldn’t lose her. She was my anchor, the proof that there was actually still some good in the world.
“I’m not sick, Colt,” she snapped, growing agitated. “I know what’s wrong with me. Like I said, it will pass in a little while. Then I have to get ready for work.”
I scrubbed my hands over my face, exasperated with her. “If you aren’t sick, then what the hell is going on? People don’t just puke up their fucking guts like you just did, and then go about their day. That shit just ain’t normal.”
“Morning sickness isn’t a life or death kind of thing,” she muttered so low that I thought I had heard her wrong.
Morning sickness.
She was right; Raven’s morning sickness had been pretty bad. The first three months or so of her pregnancy with Max hadn’t been fun for her …
Morning sickness?
Every muscle in my body tensed. No. No way. She couldn’t have been. It wasn’t possible. She …
She had admitted she wasn’t a virgin any longer the night before. We hadn’t talked about it because I had been too busy dealing with Kelli. And then there had been Raider—
No. Fucking. Way.
“Are you telling me that you’re pregnant, Quinn?”
“Yes.” I saw her lips move, but her voice was so low I couldn’t actually hear her.
Her tears started flowing faster, but she didn’t turn away from me. Instead, she looked up at me with something close to defiance in her baby blues.
The reality of what she was saying hit me in the face like a hundred-pound weight. I sucked in a deep breath, blew it out. I scrubbed my hands over my face, ran my fingers through my hair. Tried to stay calm. I wasn’t going to kill anyone. It was too fucking early for that shit. And … Fuck. And if this was all because of my brother, I really needed to think about how I was going to deal with this.
I couldn’t kill him.
Even if I wanted to.
Fucking hell, I wanted to, though.
First, I had to take care of Quinn. She had just been ill. I wasn’t going to scream at her. I wouldn’t yell.
“Who?” I bit out, trying and succeeding at keeping my voice neutral. I needed her to confirm the suspicion that was starting to eat at my sanity.
Raider had come by the night before. He had wanted to talk to her. Since when did he do that? He avoided her like she had the plague or some shit.
“That doesn’t matter. He wouldn’t want it, anyway.” She grimaced, her lips twisting. “He wouldn’t care; trust me.”
“Who?” I repeated, already imagining myself pounding the motherfucker—my goddamn brother, for fuck’s sake—into a bloody pile of broken flesh and bones at my feet.
“Can we not talk about this right now?” she mumbled, her face turning a sickly shade of green as she fought back another wave of nausea. “I’m trying to concentrate on not throwing up again.”
I wanted to press the issue, wanted to hear it from her own lips that it was, or wasn’t, my brother’s baby growing in her belly right then. She deserved so much better than Raider as her baby’s father. My brother only cared about getting his dick we
t in a new piece of strange … or one of his favorite sheep.
“Quinn, I’m going to ask you this once, and then I’ll drop it, okay?” I waited for her to nod, which she did after a slight hesitation. “Is it Raider’s?”
The truth flashed across her face before she could mask it and try to hide her reaction to my simple, yet loaded question.
Everything inside of me went completely cold. I turned off every emotion that tried to rear its head. Love for my brother. Respect for the man who I had grown up beside then rode with in the MC for years. He’d had my back, and I’d had his. We shared the same blood, the same last name. But right then, he was dead to me. He had done the one thing that would make me consider him as good as dead.
Quinn was everything to me, something he had always known, yet he had fucked her behind my back.
“It doesn’t matter,” she tried to say again. “I’m leaving, anyway.”
Leaving? She was leaving …
Goddammit. So that was why she had been dancing. That was why she was so desperate for money. She was going to pack up and leave. Get as far away from my brother as she possibly could.
She was going to leave me.
Somehow, I found the strength to stay calm as I leaned over my best friend, pressing a kiss to the center of her forehead. “I’m sorry.” My voice wasn’t normal to my own ears, but when I saw the fear in her blue orbs, I knew I wasn’t hearing things. The last thing I wanted to do was frighten her more, so I straightened and headed for the door.
“Colt,” she cried after me. “Colt, please don’t do anything stupid.”
I didn’t stop, didn’t make her any promises I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep. She wouldn’t leave if Raider was dead.
“Don’t tell him!” she screamed. Still, I kept walking. “You can’t tell him.” She was sobbing now, making my heart clench with each gut-wrenching sound that left her. “Please, don’t tell him.”
Chapter 19
Raider
The smell of bacon frying woke me from a restless sleep. Groaning, I climbed out of bed and threw on the first pair of jeans I found. Pulling a Hannigans T-shirt over my head, I stomped downstairs to find my sister fixing breakfast in the kitchen.
Thankfully, my nephew wasn’t screaming his displeasure at not being in his mother’s arms. It was almost peaceful with him so interested in the cheerios Raven had put on the little tray on his highchair. Beside him, Lexa was coloring a picture that looked like a family portrait of stick figures.
Flick was sitting at the table with the kids, a mug of coffee in her hands, but her eyes were half-closed and she was still in her robe.
Raven’s eyes widened when she saw me entering the kitchen. “You look like crap.”
Two years ago, Raven would have used an entirely different word than crap. These days, however, my potty-mouthed sister watched every word that left her mouth. At least when she was around the kids.
“Then I look how I feel,” I grumbled and took my usual place at the table.
Our house had always been big, but now it was ridiculously huge since we had added a few extra bedrooms. I wasn’t sure how we all co-existed under the same roof, but somehow, we made it work. I couldn’t honestly imagine not living in the house I had grown up in.
For a minute, I wondered how Quinn would feel about moving in with me. She could have been sitting right there with my sister and Flick, spending her morning catching up with her two friends, helping with the kids and making breakfast for everyone.
I liked the idea … a lot.
“Heard things got crazy last night.” My sister turned away from the stove to face me. “Is it true? Was she really there?”
I snuck a sideways glance at my niece before shrugging. “You mean, your husband didn’t know? He owns the place, Rave. Shouldn’t he keep up with who is actually working for him?”
She rolled her eyes at me. “You know he doesn’t have much to do with that club. He’s too busy to keep up with who Topaz hires, and so many girls come and go, it’s hard to keep up with them, even if he did.”
I didn’t try to push her further, knowing she was right. Bash was always busy these days. Whether it was with Raven and the kids, work, or the MC, he was always running around, doing something.
Clenching my jaw, I popped my knuckles as I remembered the guy touching Quinn the night before while she continued to dance on stage for a crowd of hundreds of guys, nearly naked. “Yeah,” I gritted out. “It’s true. But she won’t be going back.”
Our choice of conversation had Flick’s eyes opening a little farther. “Why was she doing it? I mean, if Quinn needed money, all she had to do was come to us.”
I shrugged. “She wouldn’t say why, other than that she needed the money.”
“Huh,” Flick muttered and took a sip of her steaming coffee. “Well, Jet said the uncles aren’t happy about it. Figure someone’s head is about to roll over it. You know how much they love Quinn.”
Everyone loved Quinn. How could they not?
How had it taken me so long to realize that I loved her, too?
For the next half an hour, I sat there, listening to the women talking. They asked me a question every now and then, but I was too lost in my own head to do more than grunt an answer or two.
Raven made me a plate of bacon and eggs before the others started coming down to start their day. Gracie was the first to enter the kitchen, and as she moved toward the coffee pot to fill her to-go cup, I pushed to my feet.
I had found out from Aggie the night before that Quinn was supposed to work from eight to four. I wanted to be there when she got in. Even if she wouldn’t talk to me, I would be there to watch over her in case Fontana or his crew tried anything.
As I was going out the back door, I heard a hog coming at a speed that would have had Raven going apeshit on the rider if the kids had been outside. I had barely closed the door to the kitchen behind me when I saw Colt coming. His tires screeched, leaving skid marks on the recently resealed driveway just feet away from me.
I had barely pulled my keys out of my picket when he was jumping off his hog and heading my way.
“Morning, broth—”
I was cut off when he did a Superman jump and threw a punch at me all at once.
I went flying backward onto my ass at the force of his punch, my jaw throbbing like a motherfucker. I didn’t even have time to ask what the hell he was doing before he jumped on me, his fists flying in every direction, each one feeling like they packed the force of a damn jackhammer.
I struggled under his assault, fighting back. I rolled us, getting a few punches to his face along the way, until I was on top. I pinned him down with my legs, holding his shoulders against the asphalt of the driveway with my hands while my little brother struggled like a bucking horse under me.
“What the fuck?” I roared in his face. The tangy, metallic taste of blood was filling my mouth, but I was too busy trying to keep him from not starting another round to care about the source of the bleeding.
“I’m going to kill you,” Colt snarled at me like a wild animal.
I tightened my hold on his shoulders when he nearly broke free, digging my knees into his ribs when he only struggled harder. “I figured that part out. Why?”
“Quinn.”
That one word, her sweet name, was all I needed to hear to know what was going on with my brother. So, he knew. I was actually glad. I had been debating back and forth with myself for weeks about just coming out and telling him what had happened with Quinn. Fear of embarrassing her or hurting her by talking to her best friend about our night together had kept my mouth shut. That and I had figured he would go fucking ballistic. I hadn’t wanted to deal with his shit then.
The same could have been said for right then, as well, but it was what it was. He knew now, and I hoped that once he calmed down, I could explain the things I had discovered about myself—that I wanted to make Quinn mine.
She already was, though. In my eyes, in my fu
cking heart, Quinn was mine in every way that mattered.
I just had to convince her of it.
“I don’t know what to say, man.” It was the truth. I had no idea what to say to him right then. Somehow, I figured saying “So, I fucked your best friend” wasn’t going to go over too well with him.
I had let myself get a little distracted thinking about her, my hold on him easing just a fraction. It was all Colt needed to pull one arm free and punch me upside the head.
“I don’t need you to say anything. I just need you to bleed.”
My ears suddenly felt like they were ringing, my vision going blurry for a moment. I tried to fight back, but my movements seemed uncoordinated. Fuck, his fists were like sledgehammers, destroying everything they landed on.
Another punch to my jaw had blood spraying from my mouth from the force of it. I could feel my tongue swelling where a tooth bit into it, making even more blood fill my mouth.
I fought back, connecting my fist with his ribs, but he was so pissed he seemed to barely feel it.
The blows kept coming. Even though I fought back, my head was becoming too cloudy, my mind becoming a jumble of everything.
“All the pussy in the world, and you had to go and put your dick in hers,” Colt growled low and ominously. “You couldn’t just leave her alone, could you?”
“It’s not like that!” I yelled up at him. “I love her, man.”
“No,” he snarled. “No, you don’t know how to love anyone but yourself. I won’t let you hurt her more than you already have. She’s too good for you, and you stole her fucking virginity, you dirty bastard.”
Shit, he didn’t have to tell me that. I knew she was too good for me. I had always known it. That was why I had stayed away from her for so long. But I hadn’t stolen her virginity.
She gave it to me.
“Colt!” I thought I heard Raven scream, but my head was too fucked up to know if she had or not. “What the hell are you two doing? What’s going on?”
Colt acted like he didn’t hear her, so I wondered if she was really there or not.