“And you just happened to find out where I live. Who I really am.”
“I didn’t just happen to. I searched for you.”
He ran a hand through his hair. His face looked bleak, his cheeks scruffy and eyes red rimmed. “I don’t blame you for not wanting to be with me.”
I took an involuntary step toward him. “How can you say that?”
He pointed at his chest, and disgust twisted his face. “Now you know the truth. I’m mecho.”
“Didn’t I tell you scars don’t bother me?” I tried to smile, though his attitude was making it tough. “Declan, I’m more surprised to learn you’re an Adar.”
Now he finally looked at me for the first time since my arrival. “Gemma, I’m not proud of that, either.”
I reached out a hand, but the way he stepped back made me drop it back to my side. “I wanted to meet you. I got caught up in a job. When I got to the park, you’d gone. I waited for you to contact me, but you didn’t. So I started looking for you.”
He laughed, though he didn’t sound amused. “Sure you did. I waited four hours, until I got the holonote.”
I hadn’t had time to send a note. “I didn’t…”
Again, he didn’t wait for me to speak. “I should have died in that accident, but I didn’t. And when I finally decided to pick up the pieces and try to gain some semblance of a real life, I didn’t realize how hard it would be. People…they look at you differently if they know you’re mecho. You can be metal, you can be flesh. You can even be enhanced. But to be mecho is something else so completely different. It shouldn’t be, but it is.”
At his words, hope stirred inside me. “I understand.”
He fixed me with a glare. “You can’t possibly.”
“Not about being part of the most powerful, wealthy and influential family in Newcity, no.” I tried to force him to meet my gaze, but his eyes skittered away from mine.
He sat on the couch, face in his hands. “Gemma, the night I met you was the first time I’d slept with a woman since the accident. I’ve been out for over a year, but I’ve never gotten that close before. When you mistook me for a Pleasurebot, I figured it was some sort of irony. But then…”
“Then what?” I prompted him.
“Then I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”
I sat next to him and put my hand on his shoulder. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you, either.”
His back shook beneath my touch as he let out another series of humorless laughs. “I saw your face when you noticed my scars. I know how people feel about mechos. I don’t blame you for being disgusted.”
Before I could tell him my own secret, he pushed away from me and began to pace the small room. When he finally whirled to face me, the look on his face made me cringe. “What I don’t understand is how you can do this to me?”
He’d left me behind. “Do what? Try to find you? To explain why I missed you that night?”
He lifted his chin and gave me a cold grin. “You had to do some pretty fancy research to figure out who I am. I’ve been damned careful.”
“Not that careful,” I shot back. Now I was getting angry. I stood and met him eye to eye. “You’ve left viddy records of yourself all over the place. Anyone at all could’ve figured out who you are, and anyone with half a brain could have figured out you didn’t die in that accident. It doesn’t take a genius to put two and two together, Declan. Mecho technology is everywhere. Nobody talks about it because nobody wants to admit they’re prejudiced, that’s all.”
“So what will it be?” he asked me, once again making me pause to think what he meant. “Money? I can get you that. Rank? I can help you there too.”
“You think I want a price to keep my mouth shut?” My throat burned with the sting of bile as I fought not to be ill.
“It’s why you came here, isn’t it?” He ran his hands through his hair again, giving me the cocky grin I hated and loved. “It’s just too good to be true, right? Caldyx Adar isn’t dead, he’s mecho. What do you want?”
“I didn’t come here to blackmail you.” I kept my voice low to keep from screaming.
“Why did you come here then, Gemma?” His voice went low too. Smooth. Cruel.
I couldn’t tell him my reasons. Not now, after his accusation had clawed me to shreds. I shook my head. I refused to allow even one tear to slide down my cheek in front of him. His face blurred and I blinked rapidly to force away the tears. I kept my voice firm through force of will when I answered him.
“I think you want to be discovered. Living out as a mecho is better than living as a prisoner.”
“What do you know about it?” His sneer did me in. I couldn’t tell him anything, now.
I spun on my heel to leave. “Goodbye, Declan.”
Two secbots greeted me as the door closed behind me. “Egress denied.”
I had no patience for protocol. “Get out of my way.”
Their pincer grips snapped down on my wrists. “Egress denied. Your presence is required.”
“By who?” I demanded, wisely not struggling in their impossible-to-break grip.
Both bots replied in metallic unison: “Howard Adar.”
I didn’t tell Howard Adar to kiss my ass, though I dearly wanted to. Instead, I stared back at him as steadily as he stared at me. Watching him watch me made my palms moist. Howard Adar wasn’t someone to mess with.
He sucked the liquid nicotine from the flexible rubber tube at the end of his holocig. Clouds of holo smoke wreathed his features, turning him into sort of a monster. He thought he was being imposing. I thought he was merely showing his true colors. Monster he seemed and monster he was.
“What sort of fool comes here, to my private abode, looking for my son?” he asked finally and put the holocig aside.
“What sort of monster keeps his own son hidden away from everything just because he’s different?” I’d said the word. Monster. If it offended him, he gave no sign.
“I’ve looked up your files, Gemma Ellen Trah. You of all people should know why Caldyx chose to remain in hiding.”
I lifted my chin, unused to hearing my full name but not surprised he’d learned it. “Somehow I doubt he had much choice.”
Howard lifted his hands in a mock-innocent gesture. “Every Newcitizen has a choice.”
“He might as well have died in that accident, with the life you gave him.”
“You speak of my son as though he were still a child.” Howard took another swig of his holocig. “Yet I know you’ve experienced him as a man.”
The thought of the man in front of me witnessing the lovemaking Declan and I had shared made me sick. “You had him followed.”
Howard laughed, the sound merry and genuine. “Of course. You don’t think I’d let him out there alone, do you? When what he is could cause such a scandal?”
“You let him return to the world.” It became clear as Howard’s face contorted in bemusement. “You allowed it, but you had him followed, to stop him if…”
“If he did something foolish?” Howard waved through the holosmoke. “Of course. Your profile didn’t lie about you, Gemma. You’re extremely smart. Tell me, sweet girl, were you always so brainy or did the computer chips the doctors slipped into your head help you out a little bit?”
“I’m not ashamed of what I am.” Even as I bit out the words, I knew he sensed the lie in them. “It’s better than being dead.”
“Not everyone would think so.” Howard slipped his finger over the bottom of his cig to seal it and put it down in a metal holder on the table next to him. “Caldyx didn’t.”
“Then why allow him on the street at all?” I tossed the question at him, and he caught it neatly.
“Because I love my son, Gemma Trah. Because I couldn’t stand to see him wasting away like he was.”
“You could have sent him Offworld.”
Howard made a tutting noise. “Offworld is for vacay or hard labor. Offworld is not for living. Not to mention that in the o
nly suitable places to send him he’d have been almost instantly recognized.”
“Why didn’t you stop me from detaining him that night?”
He shrugged. “Why deny him some carnal pleasures? God-of-choice knows he hadn’t partaken of any for quite some time. Not even the Pleasurebots I had especially ordered for him, and I can assure you I made certain he had the very best.”
He paused to give me a smug look up and down my body that left me feeling as though I’d been dipped in slime. “Though I can see that not even the best bot can compare with your obvious talents.”
He plainly didn’t see the irony in his statement. My enhancements made me mecho, made me what I am. I could be despised or lauded for them, viewed with disgust or looked upon with lust. Yet despite the extra bits and pieces, I was the same person I’d been at birth.
“I’m good at my job.”
“Care to show me how good?”
Apparently my look of disgust was enough reply for him. Howard’s smile thinned and disappeared. Behind me, I sensed the sudden presence of the secbots. I tensed, knowing I couldn’t run but ready to fight if I had to.
“If I’d known you were going to fall in love with him, I’d never have permitted you to fuck him in the first place,” Howard told me.
The word love sounded dirty in his mouth. “It doesn’t matter. He doesn’t know I’m mecho too, and he thinks I can’t stand to be with him because he is. He doesn’t trust me, and he doesn’t love me.”
“No?” Howard smirked insincerely. “Well, then. Tell me the amount to transfer to your credaccount, and you’re free to leave.”
“I don’t want your money.”
“No?” The smirk faded. “Someone who can’t be bought can’t be trusted to keep her mouth shut.”
“Would it really be so terrible if everyone knew he was still alive?” My voice rose. “Why do you care what anybody thinks, anyway? You have enough money and power. Nobody would shun him, if only because he’s your son! What difference would it make if the entire world knew he’s mecho, Adar?”
“It would make a great deal of difference to his mother and his sisters,” Howard replied. “And to me. And, I fear, to Caldyx himself. He’s proud, as I am. You’re absolutely right, Gemma. Nobody would shun him. At least not outwardly. But let’s face facts. He is an Adar. He is my son. And, unfortunately, he is mecho. The relationships he would form, the friendships, might look past his disability because of his status and wealth. But Caldyx would know the truth, and it would eat away at him.”
“Is it so impossible to think people would like him for the person he is rather than all of those things?”
Howard laughed in my face. “Really. I thought you were smart. Who in this world doesn’t judge others by their status, their wealth and power? Who in this world could possibly love my son without having some consideration for who he is?”
“I could,” I replied, and the secbots took me in their iron grips again.
Chapter Ten
“It’s imperative you keep your silence.” Howard motioned for the secbots to drag me closer to him. “If money can’t buy it, perhaps pain can.”
The first blow caught me in the small of the back, just above my kidneys. I went to my knees, unable even to scream. Before I could even catch my breath, the next blow caught me in the stomach. I writhed on Howard Adar’s priceless imported carpet, my fingers clutching the hand-woven fibers hard enough to break two of my fingernails.
“Impressive.” Howard leaned forward to watch me squirm. “Not even a peep. Hit her harder.”
One secbot whacked the side of my head with one of its metal paws. Bright spots flashed in my vision. A warm trickle I recognized as blood meandered down my forehead and into my eye, blinding me for a moment. The other secbot targeted my sides and back, raining a flurry of blows tightly targeted but no less powerful than its brother’s.
“You could hire a VCTM for this and be better satisfied,” I managed to gasp.
The next blow crunched my lips into my teeth. Blood gushed from my mouth, and I spit it onto the carpet. I curled into a ball to protect my head and stomach from the blows and tried to think through the pain.
They were metal. I am not, or at least most of me is not. They might not be able to break my metal bones, but they could do severe damage to my soft parts. Already the world was fuzzing out in grays and reds. Somehow, I had to get to my feet and stay there, out of reach of Adar’s secbots. Or else take the beating until he called them off. I didn’t think he meant to kill me…but then again, I just wasn’t sure.
I found some inner reserve of strength and rolled to my feet in a move that would’ve made Britney proud. Putting all my concentration into the leap, I forced my body to jump over the secbots’ heads until I landed behind them. As I mentioned, they’re strong, not smart. Without me in front of them to continue beating, the bots just stopped, waiting for command.
I was just glad he used metal instead of flesh security. Secbots can’t be made smart enough to do anything but follow specific orders. Intelligence leads to decision choices. People are used for real security because there’s nothing deadlier than a person who has the ability to choose, and still makes the choice of violence.
Howard looked pained. “Behind you, dolts!”
The secbots lumbered around to face me. I’d backed up against the door, fists raised to fend them off, though against the two of them the best I could hope to do was avoid them. My legs ached, because despite my extra hardware, I don’t usually perform acrobatics like that. The blood flowed more heavily from my forehead from my efforts, and I swiped at it with my sleeve.
“Feisty.” Howard shrugged. “You’re not doing yourself any favors. Take the beating and prove you won’t tell the world what you know about my son.”
“I won’t tell anyone, Adar. And not because of your money or your thugbots, either.”
“Honor?” He sneered. “Oh, wait. Love. We’ll see how long that lasts when you’re still living in that hole of an apartment, fucking Pleasurebots to earn your wage. What will happen then?”
“It won’t matter.”
“I think you know as well as anyone how love can turn so quickly to hate.” Howard sucked on his holocig. “But I see that pain is not a sufficient deterrent. How about this?”
He leaned forward to get a better look at me from around his bots. “I control Newcity. And if you cross me, you’ll find out exactly what that means. Keep your mouth shut and stay away from my son.”
I thought I knew already what his control meant, and as for staying away from Declan, he didn’t have to worry about that either. “I told you already, Adar. He doesn’t want to see me. He thinks I…”
“I know very well what he thinks. I know what was on that holonote. Do you think he’d have been so upset, so unforgiving, without it? He knows your job is unpredictable.”
“You sent the holonote?” I swiped again at the blood but no longer worried about his secbots. They stood like lumps of menacing metal, unmoving. “What did it say?”
Howard waved his hand, unconcerned. “Something about wanting to be with a real man. Something like that.”
“Why? Why hurt your son like that?”
“There’s no way on this gray earth I’d allow my son, my heir, to mate with the likes of a normal-born citizen, much less a mecho. He was born for better things, or to be alone.” He jerked his head toward the bots. “Take her out of here.”
A night in the warm and healing waters of my bed left me revived, if not refreshed. With stiffness in every limb I forced myself to strip off the dreamcream and hobble to the bathroom. What I saw in the mirror made me wince.
I’d taken plenty of beatings since beginning my career with R.I.O. My time serving in the Oldcity Riots had even landed me a few days of sick leave to recover from my injuries. But those had been wounds requiring repair my body was incapable of completing on its own—what I looked at now was something completely different. Bruises covered my skin, mo
st dark blue and black, some already edging their way to yellowish green. Marks of the secbots’ fists stood out clearly in a few places, one on my belly and another on my left thigh. The rest of the bruises blended and covered each other, turning my skin into a crazy quilt.
My face was in even worse shape. Bruises masked my eyes, and my mouth had swollen around the cut left by one of the secbot’s blows. I could only imagine how I’d have looked without the enhancements that allowed me to heal faster.
Hearing Kaelyn stir in her closet, I bent as quickly as my stiff muscles would allow and pulled a medkit from the cabinet beneath my sink. I didn’t want her to see me like this. She’d been asleep last night when I’d finally made it home.
I squeezed a length of antiseptic blood thinner from its tube and smeared it over my face. It stung my eyes and smelled nauseating, but it immediately began working. The cream penetrated my pores and got to work on the bruises around my eyes, thinning the clotted blood and allowing my enhanced circulatory and lymphatic systems to remove them. It wasn’t pretty and it hurt like hell, but it was a lot quicker than waiting for the bruises to go away on their own. The way the cream frothed slightly on application told me I’d been brewing the start of an infection too, but that was also taken care of.
I couldn’t do much to hide the cut on my mouth, but a quickfreeze pack helped the swelling go down enough to at least make me look somewhat normal. After five minutes, my face had drastically improved. My small tube didn’t have nearly enough contents to take care of my body.
My monthly application of cosmetics should have lasted another week, but there was nothing left after losing the bruises. I flipped open the small key panel next to my mirror and punched in my keycode.
“Access denied.”
I flexed my fingers, thinking the stiffness had made me fumble the numbers.
“Access denied.”
Something was wrong. I tried again, but without much hope.
“Voice control on.”
“Enter command.”
“Explain denial of access for user GMMA 4121609.”