Browsing through the insanely expensive selection of silks and laces, I pick out a few silk culottes that are embellished with hand-embroidered lace. For as kinky as Declan is in the bedroom, he prefers when I wear things delicate and feminine, so I’m sure he’ll like these French knickers. I add a few pairs of lace panties and bras before a sales lady approaches, offering, “Would you like for me to start you a fitting room?”
“No. I’d like to go ahead and purchase these,” I tell her, feeling like I need to get out of here before my mounting nausea suffocates me.
After I make my purchases and shove the ivory bag down into my larger Neiman’s one, I text Baldwin for the car and tell him to meet me at the Starbucks that’s down the street. The last thing I need is for him to know I was buying lingerie.
Baldwin is noticeably quiet as he drives the few minutes it takes to get back home. When I get off the elevator, I’m surprised to see Jacqueline with her baby on her hip walking through my living room.
“Jacqueline, what a pleasant surprise,” I greet as she approaches me with Bennett striding along behind her.
“Well, Richard would rather sleep and let me take care of his business than doing it himself,” she says, and when Bennett kisses my cheek and takes the shopping bags from my hands, he explains, “I needed to sign off on a few files Richard had that need to be faxed off ASAP.”
“I see,” I mumble, and then turn to Jacqueline and her son. “He’s growing fast.”
“I know. It’s amazing, isn’t it?”
“I suppose,” I respond, not caring to discuss the charms of motherhood.
“Well, I better get going. Richard is going to be hungry when he wakes, so . . .”
That guy is such a lazy bastard. Always has been. He treats Jacqueline more as a servant to his needs than a wife. Pitiful woman puts up with it too, but that’s her choice.
“It’s a shame you can’t stay longer. I’ve been so tied up lately, but we should see about a lunch date,” I say, pretending I truly care about our plastic friendship.
“That sounds great. I’ll call you,” she replies and then looks to Bennett, saying, “I’m sorry Richard couldn’t come himself.”
“No worries, Jacqueline. We will see you later,” he says as he walks her to the door to see her out.
They exchange goodbyes and then Bennett is back to me, taking me in his arms. “Did you have a good time shopping?”
“I did. Have you been working this whole time?”
“No. She just stopped by a few minutes ago,” he tells me. “I took a short nap and unpacked.”
“You? Unpacked?” I tease. “I’m impressed.”
“So little faith in me,” he responds with laughter and then dips his head to kiss me. “By the way, Cal made a call to my office while I was gone. Seems he heard about the refitting in Dubai and is curious about investment options.”
“Oh,” I remark, wondering if Declan knows his father is interested in investing with Bennett’s company.
“He wants a meeting, but isn’t able to get out of New York because of his tight schedule, so I’m going to fly out there for a few days. I want you to come with me.”
“Of course. When would that be?”
“In a couple of weeks. I have to run back down to Miami for a few days beforehand.”
“Miami?” I question, letting him see my frustration. “I didn’t see that on your schedule.”
“The realtor called while you were shopping. We finally came to negotiations on the property sale.”
“Finally.”
Bennett has a number of properties, a beachfront in Miami being one of them. He’s had it for years, but since I’ve known him, he’s never used it. Although he travels there for business, he stays in hotels since the house is out of the way.
“So . . . New York?”
Smiling, I respond, “Sounds perfect. Hopefully it’s not all business; I’d like to be able to have some time with just you.”
“I’ll make sure of it, but for now, I’ve made reservations for dinner tonight.”
“I better go get cleaned up then. I think I’ll go soak in a hot bath for a while.”
“Want company?” he asks in a smooth tone, and I nod before kissing his jaw.
We spend the rest of the day together, and after an extravagant meal, we head home and it isn’t long before Bennett crashes from not only the rich food, but the time change as well. I lie there in bed next to him and simply stare. I faintly remember him as a child. His face is clear to me only because I’ve seen plenty of his childhood pictures at his parents’ house.
He sleeps peacefully as I recall playing with him in my backyard. I don’t remember much, but he used to push me on my swing set. I would tell him to push me higher, push me into the clouds, and he would give me a giant push and then run under the swing as I went up. One time he didn’t make it, and I came crashing down on him. He said it didn’t hurt him, but I could tell that it did.
We were never good friends, just neighbors who would sometimes play together if we were both outside at the same time. He was older and already in elementary school. Soon after I started kindergarten, I was taken away and never saw him again. That was until Pike found him several years ago. When I saw him again, he had just turned thirty. Nothing about him looked the same to me, not until his mother showed me some old photo albums. That’s when I started remembering more of our time together as young kids.
And now I lie here, thinking about the part he played in the nightmare that became my life and the hate begins to fester. I want to kill him. But more than that, I want to make him suffer. I want to yell and scream, tell him who I really am. Tell him how he ruined my life, and how because of him, my father is now dead. I want him to know the destruction he caused for opening his foolish mouth. It takes a lot of effort not to clench my fist right now and beat the living fuck out of his face.
Suddenly, a muted glow casts along the ceiling and I turn my head to see there’s a notification on my cell phone. Rolling over, I look to see Declan has sent me a text. I grab the phone and quietly slip out of bed to make my way to the other side of the apartment and into the office before reading his text.
Miss you.
I sit down at the desk and type back.
Same here.
Are you okay? I can’t stop worrying about you. I fucking hate it.
I’m fine. You don’t need to worry about me.
Don’t ever tell me not to worry.
When I notice it’s after two in the morning, I respond.
Why are you up so late?
I told you. I can’t stop thinking about you and if you’re okay. I got used to having you in my bed and now all I can picture is you lying next to him.
I don’t know what to say. What do you want me to say?
That you feel what I feel.
I do.
Tell me.
I _____ you.
What does that mean?
There’s not a single word I can think of that could properly describe how I feel about you, but I feel it and it’s powerful.
So you _____ me, huh?
Yeah.
I _____ you too. I want to see you. Tomorrow.
Okay. I can get away during the day.
Come to 31st Street Harbor. Dock-K. Slip-47.
You have a boat?
Yes. What time can you be there?
10am.
10am. Don’t be late.
I shake my head at his need for control and grin as I message him back.
Trust me, I won’t. My ass and pussy are both still mad at you.
Ass, maybe, but there is no way your pussy could still be mad with the number of orgasms I have given it since.
You think so?
I know so. I’m getting hard just thinking about your divine pussy wrapped snug around my cock.
His crass words come as no surprise to me. Declan has a filthy mouth that he’s let loose a few times. He’s so blunt and honest in bed, never f
eeling the need to be modest with his words in any fashion.
Mmmm.
I’m serious. I have to control my thoughts because as soon as I think about you I get rock hard.
I’ll be sure to take extra special care of you tomorrow. I can’t have you walking around like that. The women already stare at you as it is, fantasizing about riding that cock.
Nobody is riding this but you.
I laugh and give him a taste of his possessive words and type my response.
MY cock!
Fuck. You’re killing me. I’m going to bury it so deep inside of you tomorrow.
I’m not going to want to let you go. I already miss you terribly.
Love that. My girl.
Your girl.
It takes him a while to respond as I sit here in the darkened room until he finally sends his next text.
Did you fuck him today?
Declan, you can’t ask me that.
Make sure you’re clean and don’t fuck him before you come see me tomorrow.
His request makes his jealousy crystal clear. I’ll tell him whatever makes him feel better, but I won’t stop fucking Bennett. I have to keep my charade up with him too.
Please don’t treat me like that.
I’m serious. I’ll lose my shit if I smell him on you.
You won’t. Now stop being a dick and be nice to me.
Getting feisty?
I shake my head with a smile.
Always feisty.
I know. We need to work on that.
I’m not subservient!!!
You could be. ;)
Now you’re just trying to get a rise out of me. I get your little game, McKinnon. Push me till I defy you so that you can get your jollies by ‘teaching me a lesson.’
You’ve got me all figured out, don’t you?
Does that bother you? That I can read you?
No. I love that you can read me. Now I just have to figure out how to read you.
Hmm…Maybe I like being a mystery.
I think we both know that I can see past your walls pretty well. Hide all you want, darling, but I’ll always find you.
You think so?
I know so. When I want something, I do what it takes to get it.
So, McKinnon, tell me. What is it that you want?
You. You already know that, but I like that you asked me anyway just so you could get the affirmation you were apparently seeking, which tells me all I need to know.
And what’s that?
That you want me too.
Possibly.
Don’t be coy. You don’t need to play that game with me because you already have my full interest. I get that you’re scared, but you don’t need to be with me.
You sure about that?
There’s no doubt. What about you?
I take a moment and think about how I want to respond to his question. I don’t want to be too blunt and just say yes.
I’m afraid.
Of what?
Afraid that you’ll hurt me.
Never.
Don’t say never because you’re very capable.
If you’re afraid, I’ll hold you.
And what if I freak out?
I’ll hold you tighter.
It’s now that I realize I have a huge smile splayed across my face that has been there for most of this conversation. Regardless of the truth as to what is going on, Declan is fun to talk to. He always has been. Despite the evil I’m playing and the lies I’ve told him, I feel like I have a friend. I’m playing him just as I am with Bennett, but I despise Bennett whereas Declan was never a person I had any disparaging feelings towards. The only fault is that he’s the unlucky bastard that fell for me.
You better have a good grip.
No one will ever hold you tighter.
I could stay up all night talking to you, but I have a date tomorrow morning that I cannot be late for.
Why’s that?
This time, I opt for sweet words over the flirty, tart ones I typically use with him.
He tends to worry about me when I run late. He gets upset. But I really like this guy, so I want to be sure that I’m rested and on time so that he knows I care about him enough to not cause him worry.
I adore you.
I ____ you.
10am?
10am. Night.
Night, darling.
When I make my way back into the bedroom, Bennett is still in the same position, sound asleep. It only takes a second for my ill feelings to return, so when I slip into bed, I roll to the side so I don’t have to look at him. And with my thoughts returning to the conversation I just had with Declan, I quickly ease myself to sleep.
“DID YOU HAVE any trouble finding it?” Declan asks as I step aboard his luxury performance yacht.
“Dock K. Slip 47. Just where you said she’d be,” I say with a shiver as the biting wind gusts off the water.
“Let’s go inside.”
I follow Declan into the saloon that’s fitted with a white, linen sofa and chairs that surround a large, wooden table.
“Quick tour?” he suggests as he takes my hand, and I give him an agreeing smile as he leads me through the galley and down the stairs. After showing me the starboard cabin and en-suite, along with the guest cabin and bathroom, he leads me down to the owner’s stateroom and master en-suite. The room is sleek with rich, cherry wood, a small seating area to the side, and a large bed in the center.
Declan doesn’t waste a second when he turns me in his arms and kisses me. Relaxing into the kiss, I let him move me to his liking, and when he finally pulls his tongue out of my mouth, I grin.
“What’s so funny?”
With jest, I say, “No conversation?”
Running his hands possessively down my neck and over my tits, he squeezes them in his hands before responding, “We’ll talk after I’ve had my cock inside you.”
He then grabs my hips, lifts me up, and tosses me on the bed. He climbs on top of me and between my legs with a breathy groan as I grab his face and kiss him again. Our lips crash, and we’re a blur of quick moving hands, fumbling off each other’s clothes. When he slips my shift dress over my head, tossing it aside, I know my shopping trip was worth it when his eyes flare as he takes in my French knickers and matching bra.
With both of us up on our knees, he pauses as his eyes roam over me, taking me in. It’s awkward to have a man look at me the way Declan does, with intense want and desire.
“Do you have any idea how beautiful you are?” he says softly, taking his hands and slowly running them down my ribs and stopping on my hips where he gently tugs the silk of my panties.
“Stop,” I whisper, wanting to deny his words.
“Stop what?”
“When you say things like that . . .” I start, dropping my head to break the intense eye contact, “it makes me uncomfortable.” I look back up into his eyes, adding, “I don’t know how to respond.”
“I don’t need any response, darling. But you shouldn’t be uncomfortable, not with me. I love looking at you. I love the way you look naked, your flawless, milky skin,” he says as he starts to slowly move his hands over me. “Your perfect tits,” he continues, unclasping my bra and slipping it down my arms. “Your pink nipples. It fucking makes me so hard when I see them tighten up just for me.” And then he covers my one bud with his mouth, sucking it in and swirling his tongue around before moving over to my other breast to do the same.
I run my fingers through his silky hair, and he lays me back. He begins to lightly trail the tips of his fingers down, over the swell of my breasts, and along the very sensitive skin of my abdomen, sending a shiver up my body.
“And then there’s this,” he says smooth and low as he hooks his fingers under the waist of my panties and slips them off. “Open your legs for me.”
I do, spreading them apart and exposing my bare pussy to him. As he watches me, he releases a guttural moan. He sits between my legs, and with his hands on my
knees, taking in the sight of me, he says, “Touch yourself.”
Wetting my finger in my mouth, I keep my eyes on him as I reach down and slip it between my lips, dragging my slick arousal up to my clit and begin rubbing slow circles. I watch as Declan’s eyes dilate in molten, black lust. He shifts to remove his bottoms and then moves back between my bent knees before he takes himself in his hand and begins pumping his thick cock over me. The sight alone causes me to grow even wetter, which surprises me. I’ve always struggled in the past, but with Declan it’s different. My body always responds to him, even when I try to fight it.
“Dip your finger inside and give me a taste,” he demands, and I do, sinking my finger inside the heat of my pussy and then reaching up to offer it to him. He grabs ahold of my wrist and lowers his head, sucking my finger into his mouth. “Fuck, I need you.”