“Shut up,” I whispered.
“Not that it was really a hardship. You look so much like me, it must have been like fucking a younger version of me,” she laughed.
“Get out!” I walked around her on legs that shook and jerked the door open, startling Eloise, who had been about to knock. “Just looking at you makes me sick. Get the hell out, and don’t come in here again.”
“Tut, tut, Allegra,” Lauren chided as she took her time crossing to the open door. “You’re in my house now. I call the shots here. Not you or Gio. Remember that.”
As if to prove her point, she looked at Eloise. “We will be having dinner without Allegra tonight. Don’t bring her a tray. She’s too ill to eat.”
Eloise stood there, staring after the other woman for a long moment as I leaned against the door, shaking in reaction. With a deep, troubled sigh, Eloise turned her kind eyes back to me. “She’s not right in the head, my dear. Too many blows to the head caused some brain damage. Don’t take anything to heart that she says when she’s in this kind of mood.”
“Why not? It’s all true.” Eloise opened her mouth to argue, but I lifted a hand. “It is. Now that l look back on it, she didn’t really ever care about me. She did what Papa made her do. What I once thought was love for me was really hatred for the situation I put her in.”
“You were the innocent one in all of that, child. What adults do or don’t do is one thing, but a child is helpless and innocent of all their parents’ crimes.” She grasped my hand and gave it a soft, affectionate squeeze. “You rest now, love. I’ll have Jarvis bring you a tray for dinner later.”
Not wanting to argue with her over food, I nodded, and she shut the door with a kind smile. I went back to the window and sat, once again watching the snow tremble to the earth and cover the bleak-looking garden.
Chapter 12
Dante
“You been staying out of trouble?”
I wasn’t even sure why I was asking Cristiano that particular question. When had he ever stayed out of trouble? Growing up, it seemed like Ciro and I were always cleaning up one mess or another whenever Cristiano’s hot head got him into trouble. That he was running around New York unchecked with Anya Volkov when he was supposed to be dead was giving me indigestion.
The other man’s laugh told me all I needed to know. “What’s the fun in that?”
“Okay, scratch that. What have you been doing that requires a shallow grave or a few million to clean up?”
Cristiano snorted, and I could actually picture him rolling his eyes. “Don’t worry about me, fratello. I’ve got things under control here. It’s actually been fun pretending to be dead. Makes all those times my enemies thought they’d seen me over the last few days hilarious. I saw some guy piss himself. Cracked Anya up so much she snorted coffee out her nose.”
“You’re supposed to be keeping a low profile. Stop fucking up the plan,” I snapped, raking my free hand through my hair.
“I haven’t done shit to touch your plan. It’s still going as it should. But I have plans of my own, and being dead is getting those motherfuckers to play just as I thought they would. You focus on keeping my cousin happy, and get your ass back here.”
Muttering a curse, I glared out the front window of the blacked-out SUV I used whenever I was visiting Lauren and Jenny. With Jarvis’s help, we’d spent the last few hours taking care of the stolen car that had been sitting in the garage for the past five days. During those days, Allegra had stayed in her room for the most part, only speaking to Eloise and Jarvis, who took her meals to her each day.
Happy was the furthest from how she was feeling.
At night, as I sat outside her bedroom door in hopes she would give in and let me sleep beside her, she tore my sanity apart a little more from the quiet sobs I heard coming from her as she cried herself to sleep.
None of this was going as I expected it to. Not one single thing was as it should be. Keeping this secret from her had been a mistake, I could see that as plain as day. But I thought she would be upset for a day or so and then get over it in the face of a new family. Her mother was alive and well, and she had a sister who would love her more than any sister could love a sibling, just waiting down the hall.
But Allegra’s hurt was much deeper than I ever could have imagined. She was feeling betrayed and abandoned, and she wasn’t likely to forgive me anytime soon. I’d fucked up this entire thing and didn’t know how to fix what I’d broken.
“Just don’t get for real dead,” I told him as I waited for Jarvis outside the small produce store where he was getting the few things off of Eloise’s list. “It would seriously put a dent in my plan.”
“I love you too, fratello.” He chuckled, then quickly sobered. “Sorry, got to go. My prey is on the move.”
“Who the fuck are you following?” I nearly shouted.
Cristiano’s laugh was evil as fuck, and I was pretty sure someone was going to end up in the bottom of the Hudson before the end of the night. “I’m getting Christmas presents for my sisters.”
“What the fuck does that mean? Who…” I bit back a groan as realization hit me. “You found Junior, didn’t you?”
All he did was laugh again. “See you soon, my friend.”
“Be careful, you dumb fuck.”
He was still laughing when the phone went silent. I had a sudden urge to call Scarlett and let her know her brother was up to some stupid shit, and maybe even ask her advice on the whole Allegra situation, but I stopped myself before I even pulled up her contact information. I couldn’t call her. If she hadn’t found my note—and I prayed she had—it would freak her the fuck out to hear a dead man’s voice.
Knowing Scarlett, as much as she loved me, she would shoot me in the head for not including her in my plan. But if she’d found the note, then hopefully she was working out her own plans.
Tossing my phone into the cupholder, I scrubbed my hands up and down my face. Cristiano was reckless at times—more often than not—but he was smart. He wouldn’t fuck up my plans, not when he was ready to take down his bastard of an uncle just as I was now. I needed to trust him.
And put a little trust in Anya as well.
Motherfucking hell, I had to trust that little hellion. Never thought that would happen in my lifetime, but if given the choice, I would rather the demented assassin be working with rather than against me.
Jarvis opened the door and climbed into the passenger seat. As big as the inside of the SUV was, he still looked cramped beside me. The man would have looked right at home with the World’s Strongest Man contestants. My father hired Jarvis as Lauren’s bodyguard soon after she came to live with us eleven years ago. Now, the Special Forces retiree was more often Jenny’s guard than her mother’s. Knowing he was with them while I was away gave me peace of mind. I didn’t need an army of security—something that would have been conspicuous and garner way too much attention—guarding the house with him in residence.
Without a word, I drove us back to the house, making sure we weren’t followed with several detours along the way. Jarvis was a man of few words, reserving those he did speak mostly for Jenny.
As I pulled into the garage a while later, he nodded his head toward the door. “The little one was crying again last night.”
“She’s taking everything harder than I predicted.”
“Life rarely goes as planned. It’s not scripted. If it were, I would have made sure to rewrite mine a long time ago.” He turned his head, hiding his face from me, and I wondered what dark thoughts were filling his head. The scars on his face had a story all their own, but I’d never asked, and Jarvis had never offered to tell it. “I see a lot of her mother in this girl. The skittishness, the distrust. If her father did to her as he did to Lauren, I can understand how she must feel now. To have her mother leave as she did, without attempting to take her when she went…”
“Lauren didn’t think Gio would harm Allegra,” I defende
d, pissed that Jarvis didn’t have more loyalty to the woman whose safety had been in his hands for so many years.
“Lauren wasn’t in a place to protest when she first came to live with your father. It took a long time for her head to clear,” Jarvis argued, turning the full force of his gaze on me. “Arlo was a good man. I’d known him for a long time before I came to work for him. But his dislike of Gio Vitucci was just as strong as Gio’s for him. Arlo wouldn’t have wanted his enemy’s child in his house, no matter if she was like the man or not. Arlo didn’t try to get Allegra out when he took Lauren. He got what he wanted and didn’t give a damn about anything or anyone else.”
My hands tightened their grip on the steering wheel. I wanted to argue with him, but deep down, I knew he was right. As much as my father loved Lauren, I knew that love hadn’t extended to her daughter. When he made me promise to put a bullet in Gio’s head, he hadn’t cared what collateral damage was done to accomplish it. It wasn’t until his death that Lauren even asked me to find out how her daughter was doing.
Because she knew her daughter wouldn’t have been welcome in her lover’s home.
Jarvis opened the passenger door. “The girl feels abandoned. The man who was supposed to become her husband—a man who is supposed to protect and love her above all else—betrayed her. Maybe you should think more about what this is doing to her heart than your loyalty to Lauren.”
“My loyalty is to Allegra first,” I snapped. “I love her. She’s going to be my wife as soon as I take care of her father.”
“Could have surprised me.” The big man shrugged and unfolded his huge body from the vehicle. Shutting the door, he walked casually into the house, leaving me there to stew over his words.
Fuck.
I hit the steering wheel and got out, slamming the door behind me. Walking into the kitchen, I found Eloise already at the stove, working on dinner. Her brows rose as I stomped toward the stairs, but smartly, she didn’t speak to me. Having basically raised me, she knew my moods, and the one I was in right then was explosive.
I climbed the stairs two at a time. Going straight to my room, I stripped and got in the shower. If I looked at all this through Allegra’s eyes—and apparently, through Jarvis’s as well—I could see what the man was talking about. Lauren had abandoned her, but I knew the woman better than anyone. She had agonized over leaving Allegra behind.
Wrapping a towel around my waist, I grabbed another to dry myself as I walked into my bedroom. Pulling on underwear and jeans, I was just reaching for a shirt when there was a soft tap on the closed bedroom door. Hoping it was Allegra, I crossed the vast room in a handful of strides, but that hope was dashed when I saw Lauren standing on the other side.
There were tears in her eyes that she was trying to keep at bay but had already lost the battle to contain. They spilled over her lashes slowly. Without thinking, I opened my arms to her.
She threw herself against me. “She hates me.”
Sighing, I swung the door closed and walked with her over to the ottoman. Sitting down, I hugged her to me with one arm. “She’s just hurt and confused. Give her time to absorb all of this.” They were the same words I’d repeated to myself the last few days, but they felt hollow. I didn’t know if Allegra could get past my betrayal. The future looked bleak without her beside me. “Just give her time to come to terms with everything. She’ll come around sooner or later.”
“Sooner would be preferred,” Lauren said with a sad laugh.
“Fuck, I completely agree. She’s killing me. I’ve paid for sins I haven’t even committed yet listening to her crying every night.”
We both drifted into silence. My mind was on Allegra and how I was going to fix everything. I missed her. Even though she was just down the hall, it felt like she was on the other side of the world. Instead of confronting her like I ached to do, I’d given her time to herself, knowing she wouldn’t listen to a word I had to say until she was ready. The damn woman was just as stubborn as her cousins. Having dealt with both Scarlett and Victoria while they were at their stubbornest, I knew I needed to bide my time and let her get her head on straight.
“I’m sorry I pulled you into this,” Lauren said with a sigh, taking my hand. Shaking her head, she linked our fingers. “I know how reluctant you were to even start checking on her for me.”
“It’s fine. Don’t mention it.” I pulled my hand free, feeling suddenly uncomfortable. Her tears were gone now, and I was getting vibes from her that I’d never gotten before. I didn’t like the new tension that was filling the room. It was wrong in every possible way, and disgust began to churn in my gut.
What the fuck was going on here?
“No, I’m serious,” she murmured, looking up at me through her lashes. “This has put you in a bad situation, and I don’t think I’ve even said I was sorry for forcing you to do any of it.”
“Lauren,” I began, but she cupped my face in her free hand, her thumb rubbing over my chin then my lips.
“All these years, you should have been looking for someone you could actually spend your life with. Instead, I made you pursue Allegra so I could get her back, when I should have just been brave enough to take my daughter back myself. The only good thing that came from Gio trying to kill you is that you got her out without actually having to marry her.”
I pushed her hands away. “I want to marry Allegra. As soon as this shit is taken care of, I’m going to make her my wife.”
Disbelief and confusion filled her eyes. “Really?”
“Of course, really. Did you honestly think I would marry someone I don’t care about? Even for you, I wouldn’t do that. Allegra is my other half. I love her.”
“I don’t understand,” she muttered as she stood. “I thought… I thought you and I would end up together.”
Surprise hit me right between the eyes while my disgust at the vibes I was feeling from her had bile rising in my throat. “What the fuck? Why would you think that?”
“Because you love me. Because you’re always coming back to me. You take care of me and Jenny just like your father did.” She crossed her arms over her chest, looking more mad than hurt. “I assumed that once Allegra was here, you would divorce her and marry me.”
I pushed to my feet and just stood there staring down at her for a long moment. Was she out of her mind? She had to be delusional to think I would ever do something like that to my father, dead or not. But it was more than that. I would never do anything like that to hurt Allegra.
“You thought I would marry your daughter then come back and play happy family with you as my wife?” The look she gave me said that was exactly what she expected. “Lauren, I love you as a son loves his mother. I come back to visit with Jenny, and I take care of you because my father made me promise to make sure you always had what you need,” I explained to her quietly, unsure if she was mental or if she was finally showing me her true self. “I’m in love with Allegra. I have been for years. She owns my heart.”
Lauren wrapped her arms around my waist and touched her lips to my bare chest. “You don’t mean that,” she purred seductively. “You know it’s me you want. That’s why you like her so much. She looks just like me.”
I jerked her arms from around me. Stepping away from her, I lowered my head until our gazes were even. It didn’t matter if she was delusional or just a conniving bitch, I wasn’t playing games with her. “If you ever touch me like that again, I will take Jenny and Allegra, and you will never see either of your daughters again.”
Her eyes narrowed to slits. “That little bitch is messing everything up. I can’t believe I wanted her to live with us. I’ll—"
I could see the threat in her angry gaze before the words even formed. “If you do anything to hurt Allegra, I will cut off everything. Everything. Understand?”
Allegra
Feeling like a thief sneaking through the house, I stood outside Dante’s bedroom door. I’d watched from the guest room win
dow as he and Jarvis had returned from their errand, but it had taken me a while to build up the courage to leave my newfound sanctuary. Just as I had opened the door to leave my room, I saw Lauren knock on the same door I had been mentally preparing myself to approach.
Curious, I watched her dash away a few tears as she waited for the door to open. Those tears did nothing to faze me. They were fake, just like she was.
The door opened, and I caught a glimpse of Dante in just a pair of jeans, his hair damp from a shower. He took one look at her face and opened his arms. Her sob sounded tortured as she threw herself against him, burying her face in his chest. “She hates me,” I heard her cry as the door began to shut.
I refrained from rolling my eyes and found myself moving closer to the door. Reaching it, I saw that it hadn’t shut completely. There was still enough of an opening that allowed me to hear everything they were saying clear as day. I didn’t want to believe anything Lauren said the day she came to my room. I wanted to hear him deny everything, but deep in my gut, I knew he wouldn’t. My heart was already breaking as I listened closely.
“Give her time to come to terms with all of this,” Dante was advising. “She’ll come around sooner or later.”
“Sooner would be preferred.” To my ears, the laugh sounded fake and grated down my spine.
“Fuck, I completely agree. She’s killing me. I’ve paid for sins I haven’t even committed yet listening to her crying every night.”
Embarrassment stained my cheeks. I didn’t realize anyone could hear me as I’d cried myself to sleep this past week. Christ, I didn’t want him to know I was crying myself to sleep ever. He already had enough power over me, and I wasn’t willing to give him more. Promising myself I wasn’t going to cry anymore, I leaned my head closer.
“I’m sorry I pulled you into this,” Lauren said with a sigh. “I know how reluctant you were to even start checking on her for me.”