Page 84 of Ancient Evenings


  Yet, my Ka replied that nothing could be worth more to the Ka than to know its purpose, and that I felt by the presence of our strength as I went up the ladder. I think all magic was at my feet. As I climbed, I saw the moon, and Osiris was in it waiting for me, and by either arm was Horus and Set. I was near to the Boat of Ra. All that was in me shifted, even Time itself.

  For, now, a comet approaches. I suffer the onslaught of a frightful wind. A pain is coming that will be like no pain felt before. I hear the scream of earth exploding. In this terror, vast as the abyss, I still know more than fear. Here, at the center of pain is radiance. May my hope of heaven now prove equal to my ignorance of where I go. Whether I am the Second or the First Menenhetet, or the creature of our twice seven separate souls and lights, I would hardly declare, and so I do not know if I will labor in greed forever among the demonic or serve some noble purpose I cannot name.

  By this I am told that I must enter into the power of the word. For the first sound to come out of the will had to traverse the fundament of pain. So I cry out in the voice of the newly born at the mystery of my first breath, and enter the Boat of Ra.

  We sail across dominions barely seen, washed by the swells of time. We plow through fields of magnetism. Past and future come together on thunderheads and our dead hearts live with lightning in the wounds of the Gods.

  1972–1982

  To my daughters, to my sons, and to Norris

  By Norman Mailer

  The Naked and the Dead

  Barbary Shore

  The Deer Park

  Advertisements for Myself

  Deaths for the Ladies (and Other Disasters)

  The Presidential Papers

  An American Dream

  Cannibals and Christians

  Why Are We in Vietnam?

  The Deer Park—A Play

  The Armies of the Night

  Miami and the Siege of Chicago

  Of a Fire on the Moon

  The Prisoner of Sex

  Maidstone

  Existential Errands

  St. George and the Godfather

  Marilyn

  The Faith of Graffiti

  The Fight

  Genius and Lust

  The Executioner’s Song

  Of Women and Their Elegance

  Pieces and Pontifications

  Ancient Evenings

  Tough Guys Don’t Dance

  Harlot’s Ghost

  Oswald’s Tale: An American Mystery

  Portrait of Picasso as a Young Man

  The Gospel According to the Son

  The Time of Our Time

  The Spooky Art

  Why Are We at War?

  Modest Gifts

  The Castle in the Forest

  On God (with J. Michael Lennon)

  Mind of an Outlaw

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  Born in 1923 in Long Branch, NJ, and raised in Brooklyn, NORMAN MAILER was one of the most influential writers of the second half of the twentieth century and a leading public intellectual for nearly sixty years. He is the author of more than thirty books. The Castle in the Forest, his last novel, was his eleventh New York Times bestseller. His first novel, The Naked and the Dead, has never gone out of print. His 1968 nonfiction narrative, The Armies of the Night, won the Pulitzer Prize and the National Book Award. He won a second Pulitzer for The Executioner’s Song and is the only person to have won Pulitzers in both fiction and nonfiction. Five of his books were nominated for National Book Awards, and he won a lifetime achievement award from the National Book Foundation in 2005. Mr. Mailer died in 2007 in New York City.

 


 

  Norman Mailer, Ancient Evenings

 


 

 
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