A moment passed. I was too shell-shocked to speak. Julian massaged the back of my neck, like it was a natural instinct to touch me, soothe me. His voice was gentle, cajoling. “And now it seems my fears are coming true.”
“What? No! I love you. I love you, too,” I babbled.
Julian’s chuckle was full of affection. “I do believe your kiss told me that just a moment ago.”
I tried to focus on breathing. “The kiss, right. The kiss.”
His eyes were tender now. “Is there anything else you’d like to tell me?”
I bobbed my head foolishly. “Yes, that I want to be with you.”
“Be with me, then,” he purred and caught my lips in a kiss. This one was slower, more intentionally seductive than the last. Julian drank me in, his tongue circling mine. My brain was a scramble of lust and heat when he captured all my hair in his hand and pushed it aside so that he could lick and suck at my neck.
“Come with me,” he said, taking my hand and dragging me behind the set, where there were no cameras lurking. Quick as a flash he pushed me up against the wall and kissed me like it had been a thousand years instead of a few months.
I moaned when he pressed his erection against my belly. His movements became frenzied, his need for me evident in his desperation to get as close as possible. One hand moulded my breast over my top, while the other reached down to slide beneath my skirt. He fingered the lace of my underwear softly before he pushed past the barrier and stroked my aching clit.
I gasped into the kiss, hands pawing open his shirt, so I could feel his skin. I needed him now more than ever. Anyone could come along, but I was lost in the moment, too far gone to care. Overcome with the need to see him come apart, I grabbed both his hands, stopping them in their exploration. I turned us so that he was the one with his back to the wall, then lowered to my knees.
“I’ve wanted to do this for a really long time,” I whispered, hands shaking as I reached for his fly.
His Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat as he gazed down at me, murmuring a raspy, “Ellen.”
I pulled his cock from his pants, maintaining eye contact as I pressed my lips to his tip. In all the research I’d done about blow jobs, one thing seemed to be key; eye contact was a big turn on. It seemed to work when Julian swore under his breath, his chest rising and falling rapidly. He reached down to stroke my cheek and I took him into my mouth.
“Jesus,” he growled quietly, his head falling back against the wall.
I licked his tip, then swirled my tongue around the head. This made his eyes roll back and a series of swearwords fell from his mouth. I loved watching him, adored the reactions I could elicit.
When I took as much of his cock into my mouth as I could, he undulated. I moved my mouth up and down, building up a rhythm, enjoying the noises that came from him. They were unlike his usual noises during sex, somehow more strained and needful. He reached down again and stroked my hair away from my face, his fingers caressing my cheek and jaw.
“You’re so beautiful, Ellen. You look incredible right now.”
I moaned and cupped his balls. Another tip I learned online which appeared to work. Julian grunted, his voice breathless. “Are you sure you’ve never done this before?”
I chuckled as I sucked him and that seemed to drive him even more wild.
“Fuck, I’m nearly there,” he rasped right before he came.
I was in a daze, hardly believing I just took charge like that. “I need you,” I breathed, and Julian swore.
“I don’t have a condom.”
“That’s okay, I’m on the pill now.” After the last time, I made it a priority.
He eyes darkened as he pulled me up to stand. Lighting quick he flipped me around, shoved up my skirt, yanked down my knickers and pushed inside me. I was surprised he could go again so quickly, but then, Julian had always been insatiable and he hadn’t had sex for months.
We were skin to skin and it felt amazing. He fucked me fast, his thrusts hard and desperate. I bit down on my lip to keep from screaming. In the background, I could hear the cast and crew returning from lunch.
“Crap,” I said past a moan.
Julian sucked my earlobe into his mouth. “You’re a dirty little thing once you get going, aren’t you,” he whispered then nipped me with his teeth.
I stifled a yelp. His hand went under my top, sliding down the cup of my bra to squeeze my breast. I sighed when he pinched my nipple right at the same time he fucked me deep.
His hand moved down my body, under my skirt to circle my clit. His movements matched the speed of his thrusts, and when I came on his fingers and cock, I couldn’t help the loud moan that escaped me.
“Perfect,” Julian purred, his voice husky in my ear. He pulled at my chin, turning my mouth to his for a kiss. I felt like goo, soft and malleable.
When we heard footsteps approach, we scrambled to right ourselves. We managed to make ourselves decent just in time before a crew member walked by carrying equipment. He barely spared us a second glance as he continued on his way.
Julian made a soft noise of satisfaction as he wrapped his arms around me. “These last months have been dreadful. The worst of my life. I’m never letting you go again.”
His words spread a warmth across my chest and I sank into his hug. When I pulled away slightly to look up at him, he was gazing down at me with such fondness and love, I felt like I might burst. This morning I’d still been so unsure, but as soon as I heard him speak on that monitor, as soon as I saw the look of sheer longing on his face, the sound of agony in his voice, I knew he was being true. He didn’t want to hurt me again, and so long as I gave him a second chance, he’d do everything in his power not to, and that was good enough for me.
“I love you so much, Julian. You have my heart now. Please be careful with it.”
He took my hand and placed it over his chest. “Don’t you know? You were in here from the very beginning. If I hurt you, I hurt both of us. And I would rather die than be without you again.”
I blinked several times as his heartfelt words sank in. I was going to be brave and take a chance at happiness. And I believed him completely.
I no longer felt alone in the world. Julian was the other part of me now. We were in this together, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Epilogue
Julian
One year later
The flashing lights were somewhat blinding. In all my years escorting and socialising, I’d never actually walked a red carpet.
Ellen and I emerged from a town car, stepping out into a frenzied, exhilarating atmosphere of anticipation. Fans and members of the press had gathered outside the theatre for the premiere of Good Girl, Bad Lady. Ellen and I linked arms as we prepared to enter the fray.
“Deep breaths in and out,” I soothed as I led her toward the start of the red carpet.
She nodded and inhaled, visibly nervous. “Deep breaths. Okay.”
I smiled and pressed a kiss to her cheek, nuzzling a little before I pulled away. “You’ve got this, Ellen.”
Tonight, she wore a long champagne coloured gown that Suze had designed especially for her. A plus side to having a fashion designer as your BFF. I considered sending her a thank you note. The dress swept over Ellen’s curves, hugging her in all the right places.
I looked forward to later, when I could slide it off her perfect body.
Damon and Rose were just ahead of us. Rose stood off to the side with Damon’s PR agent, while the newly minted director answered questions from eager journalists. Over the last few years, he’d gotten much better at interacting with the press. I remembered when he and Rose first met, he was stiff and awkward whenever he was being interviewed.
“Damon cuts a fine figure in that suit,” Ellen commented, and I levelled her with a playful scowl.
“I’m the only be-suited gentleman you should be admiring tonight.”
She gave a flirtatious grin. “Just keeping you on your toes.”
>
I thought of how much she’d changed over the last year. Before, Ellen had a panic attack every time she had to talk to a stranger. Now, she was out and about most days, whether it was for business meetings or attending various book events, she was a veritable social butterfly. It was incredibly gratifying to see her shine.
And I was a lucky bastard.
After over a year, I’d surprised myself with how suited I was to monogamy. Just like there were positives to being single, there were many positives to being in a relationship, too. I adored having a partner, someone to share all aspects of my life with. Someone to come home to, because Ellen was my home now. I never felt the urge to stray, to seek comfort with another. In Ellen, I found what I hadn’t realised I’d been looking for. My heart had been searching for her all this time, I just hadn’t known it.
After several months and much discussion, we’d decided to move in together. I’d grown frustrated switching between my flat and her house, and since she had the bigger place, we agreed that was where we would live. I did say I was an evolved modern gentleman. I could handle the fact that my partner earned significantly more than me.
I may have had quite a lucrative career as an escort, but I couldn’t compete with the likes of E.S. Grant.
Speaking of careers, I found a new and engaging calling in film and TV. It turned out there was a certain need for technical consultants with my particular variety of experience. It was fast-paced and exciting, and I was currently consulting on the set of a television show that featured a call girl.
Ellen and I moved along the barricade. Lots of people had brought books for her to sign. After about twenty minutes, we finally made it to the press section.
To our left, a journalist called out, “Miss Grant! Miss Grant!”
Unlike the actors attending the premiere, Ellen didn’t have a PR agent to field requests. It might be something for her to consider, seeing as her books had become even more popular since the movie started getting promoted.
Seeing her apprehension, I placed my hand to the small of her back and whispered in her ear, “Picture them all naked, perhaps?”
She arched an eyebrow. “Sometimes I wonder if you have a secret desire to become a naturist. You have a startling preoccupation with nudity.”
I slid my thumb over the inside of her wrist. “Only yours, and mine. Preferably together.”
A satisfying shudder went through her and she gave a breathy giggle. We reached the journalist, a blonde woman with an asymmetrical bob. “Miss Grant, you look fantastic tonight. How does it feel to finally see your story on the big screen?”
Ellen opened her mouth, closed it, then opened it again. Like I’d coached her, she took a deep breath in and out, then finally replied, “Well, I haven’t actually seen it, but I’m pretty excited. I feel incredibly fortunate that all this has happened. Few books see their films actually come to fruition.”
“Very true! Do you know anything about a sequel? Has it been given the green light?”
She laughed. “Slow down, nobody’s even seen the first one yet.”
I beamed at her, unable to help the pride I felt. She might’ve been a little tongue-tied to begin with, but now she was taking it in stride.
“And what about the lead actors? Are the rumours true that they’re dating?”
Ever since filming began, gossip surrounded Alicia and David, and whether or not they were seeing each other. David told me it was all false, and that he and Alicia were merely friends.
“I have no idea,” Ellen replied. “You’ll have to ask them that.”
The woman affected a disappointed pout and then there was a flurry of activity as another car arrived. Almost to contradict my previous thought, the door opened and David emerged, followed by Alicia. If I wasn’t mistaken, they both looked a little rosy-cheeked. Had they just…?
Alicia took David’s arm and they strode forward to greet the fans, sign posters, and pose for selfies.
I glanced at Ellen and saw she was just as intrigued as I was, though the fact that they arrived together didn’t necessarily mean anything. Co-stars arrived at premieres together all the time. Still, this wouldn’t help the rumours.
As David and Alicia passed us by, I caught hold of my friend’s elbow. “Something you’d like to tell me?” I asked curiously.
David shook his head, though I did catch a hint of coyness. “Nothing at all, Julian.”
That sneaky bastard.
I knew the look of a man who was getting laid. Though honestly, if Alicia made David happy, then that was good enough for me.
Ellen and I entered the cinema and I quickly procured her a glass of wine. She took it gratefully.
“That was crazy.”
I smiled with affection. “Better get used to it.”
We made our way inside. There was to be a short question and answer session before the film started. I stood off to the side as Ellen took a seat on stage next to Damon. Also present were David and Alicia, and two other members of the cast, Peter and Anna. The host introduced everyone and asked Damon several questions to start; why did he choose this particular film for his directorial debut, how had the characters spoken to him. Alicia and David shared a few funny anecdotes from the set, while Peter and Anna expressed how lucky they felt to be involved.
Ellen spoke of her apprehension about having her book adapted for film. Her voice was clear and concise, confident even. I knew it took a lot for her to speak in front of hundreds of people, but with all the signings she’d done she was definitely getting used to it. She told the host how Damon was the only one she trusted with her baby, and that his vision truly captured her.
The host opened up questions to the room and lots of hands shot up, naturally. He pointed to a woman with brown hair. She stood, and an usher presented her with a microphone.
“Hi, everyone. My question is for David and Alicia. Are the rumours true that you’re a couple?”
The two shared a glance, then Alicia replied, “The rumours are false. We’re just friends.”
There was a sound of audible disappointment from the audience, which gave me a chuckle. Everybody liked to get invested in a good showmance. I suspected that if they were seeing each other, they were keeping it under wraps. The next question came from a diminutive woman in the middle row.
“My question is actually about the storyline in the books. I’d like to ask E.S. if she originally intended for Toby and Sasha to get together in the end, or if it just happened naturally over the course of the series?”
Ellen sat forward, smiling at the woman who was clearly a big fan. “No, actually. That wasn’t my original intention. After all, Sasha had a number of love affairs with various characters in earlier books, but over time it started to become clear to me that she had feelings for Toby. In the end, he was the one to steal her heart. It all happened very organically.”
“Thank you,” the woman replied and sat.
Ellen’s eyes met mine. In some ways, I was Sasha and she was Toby. For years, Ellen had been writing about us and she didn’t even know it.
The session ended and she walked off stage. I took her in my arms, hugging her tight. “You did great. I love you so much.”
“I love you, too,” she said, whispering her lips across my neck and sending a jolt of awareness directly to my crotch.
I took her hand and led her to our seats. “Just you wait until I get you home.”
We sat and I kept our hands linked together. She laid her head on my shoulder just as the opening scene began…
A smartly dressed Sasha hurries through the streets of London when it starts to rain. The fat drops threaten to ruin her outfit, so she buys a paper from a newsstand and uses it to shield from the downpour. When she finally reaches the office building, she dumps the paper in a trash can. She shakes herself off, takes a deep breath and strides toward the reception desk.
“Hi, I’m Sasha Orlando. I’m here to interview with Toby Richards.”
The recep
tionist looks her up and down. “Right this way, Miss Orlando.”
END.
About the Author
L.H. Cosway lives in Dublin, Ireland. Her inspiration to write comes from music. Her favourite things in life include writing stories, vintage clothing, dark cabaret music, food, musical comedy, and of course, books. She thinks that imperfect people are the most interesting kind. They tell the best stories.
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L.H. Cosway’s HEARTS Series
Praise for Six of Hearts (Book #1)
"This book was sexy. Man was it hot! Cosway writes sexual tension so that it practically sizzles off the page." - A. Meredith Walters, New York Times & USA Today Bestselling Author.
"Six of Hearts is a book that will absorb you with its electric and all-consuming atmosphere." - Lucia, Reading is my Breathing.
"There is so much "swoonage" in these pages that romance readers will want to hold this book close and not let go." - Katie, Babbling About Books.
Praise for Hearts of Fire (Book #2)
"This story holds so much intensity and it's just blazing hot. It created an inferno of emotions inside me." - Patrycja, Smokin' Hot Book Blog.
"I think this is my very favorite LH Cosway romance to date. Absolutely gorgeous." - Angela, Fiction Vixen.
"Okay we just fell in love. Complete and utter beautiful book love. You know the kind of love where you just don't want a book to finish. You try and make it last; you want the world to pause as you read and you want the story to go on and on because you're not ready to let it go." - Jenny & Gitte, Totally Booked.