It was an unusually hot day for October. Everyone seemed to be at the playground where they practiced. Tracy watched out of the corner of her eye to notice if Amir’s friend Todd was there. Tracy was curious to see what he looked like.
After practice, Tracy talked Jantel into following Amir home with her. She was scared to say anything to him with his buddies still around. Amir spotted them and refused to speak.
Tracy sneered at him. “Oh, you don’t know me now?”
“Nope,” he told her, laughing with his friends.
Tracy smiled at his sarcasm. “Come here for a minute, Amir.”
“Hold up, y’all, let me see what she wants.”
“Yo, we’ll get back with you then,” his friends told him.
Amir walked over to Tracy. Close up, and with his hat off, Tracy noticed that his block-shaped hair had dents in it from wearing his helmet. And unlike Steve, Amir didn’t shy away from her hazel eyes.
Tracy asked him carefully, “Why don’t you walk me home?”
Amir shook his dented head. “Naw, ’cause I’m ’bout to do something.”
“Come on, Amir. Please,” she begged him.
Amir began to laugh at her, unmoved by her pleading. His friends then yelled from down the street, “YO AMIR, WE ’BOUT TO HAVE WATER BALLOON FIGHTS!”
“OH, BET!” he hollered back, immediately taking off to go and join them.
Dag, I had him, Tracy thought.
“Let’s go around there,” she said to Jantel.
“All right.”
They ran two blocks up and watched as the boys chased each other like buffoons, screaming and hurling water balloons. Amir then threw one at Tracy. She got hit before she had a chance to duck. Water splashed all over her clothes and hair. One of his friends followed his lead and bombed away at Jantel. The girls quickly became target practice. After getting splashed a few more times, Jantel started to cry, but Tracy was still having fun.
An angry parent roared from his patio, “AMIR, LEAVE THEM DAMN GIRLS ALONE!”
Tracy and Jantel headed on their way back home.
Tracy asked, “What ’chew start cryin’ for?”
Jantel whined, “They hit me in my eye.”
“YO TRACY, HOLD UP!” Amir shouted down the block to them. Tracy turned and waited for him at the corner. Jantel marched home while rubbing her left eye. Once he had caught up, Amir walked home with Tracy.
“Why she start crying?”
“Because one of y’all hit her in her eye.”
“Well, you ’bout to go in the house?” Amir asked.
Tracy smiled, anticipating something “juicy.” “I don’t know. Why?” she quizzed him.
Once they had reached Tracy’s house, Amir sat on her steps and looked up at the moon. “ ’Cause,” he told her, hinting at companionship.
Tracy grinned and sat down beside him. “You got me all wet,” she complained, feeling a cool draft.
Amir said, “Come here. Let me see how wet you are.” He sat Tracy right down on his thigh pad. “Dig it, you are wet.”
“Shet up, boy,” she teased.
Amir looked at her lips. Tracy could sense what he was thinking. He then wrapped his hands around her waist before she had a chance to respond and kissed her. Tracy couldn’t resist him. Amir’s arms were pretty strong, and Tracy began to like how tightly he held her.
Amir suddenly backed away.
“What ’chew stop for?” Tracy asked him, curiously. She looked up at her house and then next door to make sure no one saw them. She then hopped off of Amir’s lap in a panic. Oh my God! What am I doing? she asked herself. I could have gotten busted, right in front of my house.
“ ’Cause,” Amir said again.
Tracy hopped down a few steps to distance herself from him. “ ’Cause what?”
Amir paused. “You wanna come over my house Monday?”
“I’on care,” Tracy said without thinking. She simply went with the feeling, and the feeling from Amir was good.
Amir grinned, surprised that she had agreed. “How old are you?”
“Thirteen. Why?”
“Oh, I was just asking. So you coming to my house, Monday, after school, right?” he asked again, just to make sure.
“Aw’ight,” Tracy chirped, still filled with sneaky excitement. She then got up to go inside the house as Amir took off running, carrying a big smile on his face.
Tracy thought about the next thing that comes after kissing that night. It tickled her stomach to think about the possibility of “doin’ it.” I don’t know, she told herself. I don’t know if I want to.
Tracy bragged about her football team’s record at school. They were still undefeated and on their way to a sure championship. Students wore jerseys from other teams and argued with her up and down the halls in between their classes. Tracy had forgotten all about going over to Amir’s house. She wasn’t ready to go past kissing yet. She had hardly done that. Amir had been the first and only boy Tracy had kissed since Aaron Barnes, at least five boyfriends ago. Having a boyfriend was like watching television to Tracy. She didn’t have to get too involved, she would just change the channel and watch something new.
Tracy came across three girls inside of the lunchroom. They had some interesting gossip to nose in on.
“I know, he is nasty. He only want you for one thing,” a slim brown girl was saying.
“Yup, and that’s why I don’t talk to him no more,” a darker brown girl responded.
“But Todd is cute though, ain’t he?” a lemon-skinned girl interjected.
“Yeah, but forget Amir. Bunk him, y’all, ’cause he’s just a user.”
The shock was enough to ruin Tracy’s day. Raheema was right. It came back to Tracy that she was supposed to go over Amir’s house after school. I’m not going to that boy’s house, she thought. He ain’t gettin’ none from me. That boy thinks I’m stupid. He’s out here trying to get everybody.
“Ay, girl, what’s up?” Amir called, as soon as Tracy stepped out of her building. Several football players from her school shook his hand. Tracy wasn’t impressed. She kept pacing by, ignoring him.
“Where you goin’?” he asked her.
“I’m going home.”
“I thought you said you was gon’ come over today.”
“Did you get out of school early?” Tracy asked, avoiding his question.
“Yeah, we get out earlier than y’all every day. I’m in high school.”
Tracy frowned at him. “You don’t trust me or something? I said I was gonna come.”
“Oh, I’m supposed to trust you so you can sell me out?” Amir retorted.
“You can’t take my word for it?” Tracy asked him.
Amir shook his blocked-shaped head. “Nope.”
“Well, you go find yourself somebody else then,” Tracy responded to him, walking away.
Amir went back to his friends.
“Yo, what happened, man?”
“Fuck that girl, cuz’,” he answered, sourly. “She ain’t nothin’. Bet, here comes Carmen.”
Carmen walked out from the building, switching her firm young hips and wearing a bright red jacket. She stood out from everyone, and her soft brown skin smelled of cocoa-butter cream.
Amir waited for her to walk near him. Carmen tried not to notice. Amir stepped in her way.
“Where you goin’?”
“I’m goin’ home,” Carmen responded nervously.
“No you ain’t. You goin’ wit’ me,” he told her, snatching her by the hand.
Carmen asked, “Where we goin’?”
“We goin’ to my boy’s crib. Why, you don’t wanna go wit’ me?” he snapped, letting go of her hand momentarily.
“I didn’t say that.”
“Well, shet up and come on then.”
almost time
Tracy shot up in height during the football season to tower over most of the boys. She lost her babyface look, and she began to wear her hair shoulder le
ngth and curled. Although she was just thirteen, her size made her appear seventeen or eighteen. Tracy had developed into a vivaciously curved young lady, with a new hobby, observing herself inside of the mirror.
Raheema grew a bit herself, but neither she nor her older sister, Mercedes, had grown anywhere as tall or as well-defined as Tracy had. Tracy outgrew most of the girls her age, beginning to look more like a high-schooler than an eighth-grader. She was beginning to attract the attention of much older guys as well. High-schoolers had always gathered after school to entice younger girls who were willing to step up in competition. And at least physically, Tracy had crossed over into the bigger, faster league of the dating game.
On a Friday afternoon in the frost of winter, Tracy headed home from school, sensing plenty of the lustful teenaged eyes glued to her backside. Expecting them to approach her, Tracy was more than willing to test her tempting skills of persuasion with the older guys. By the time she reached the corner, one high-school boy had decided to try his luck.
“Ay, sexy, come here for a minute,” he said, smiling with assurance. He knew he was older than Tracy, and young-girls were easy to talk to.
Tracy cracked a grin and walked over to him, swaying her newly developed hips as she pouted her medium-full lips and licked them wet as she stood.
The boy anxiously thought about what to say to her. What’s the coolest line? he mused. “Yeah, umm, what’s your name?” he asked, warming up his game.
“It’s Tracy,” she answered him, huskily and slow. “Why?”
“ ’Cause you look good, and I wanna get to know you.”
Tracy used her stabbing hazels to dazzle him. “You looking for a girlfriend, or just somebody to mess wit’?” she quizzed him.
The older boy was stunned. “What? Oh, I mean, I’on know,” he said, stumbling.
“What’s your name?” Tracy asked him.
“Jeff.”
“Where your girlfriend at, Jeff? I know you got one. Don’t you?”
Jeff backed off, trying desperately to get himself together. “I ain’t got no girlfriend,” he mumbled. His self-assurance was gone in the wind. Tracy had turned out to be more than what he had expected.
“Why not? You look cute to me,” she told him, while moving in closer to him. Tracy always knew when she had a boy on his heels.
Jeff laughed nervously. “Come on now,” he responded, losing eye contact with her. She was invading his comfort zone.
Tracy knew she would reject him. Jeff was not cool enough to gain her consideration. She just wanted to practice her game, and she was doing extremely well.
Jeff asked, “Where’s your boyfriend?”
Tracy fixed the new gold ring that she wore on her right hand. “I don’t have one.”
“Oh yeah,” Jeff responded meaninglessly. He was hesitant to continue. The young girl was more than he had bargained for.
Tracy locked in on his eyes with hers. She knew the effect that this would have. Only the most confident boys could survive her intent stare. “Are you finished?” she asked him seductively, loving every minute of it.
“Yeah, but umm, I’ll see you around, aw’ight,” he stammered.
The high-schooler backed completely away, embarrassed with himself. Tracy turned to walk home, beaming from ear to ear.
“Yo, you didn’t answer me,” he pouted. His friends were approaching.
Tracy turned with a smile and said, “Bye,” breathlessly. She figured that Jeff had to show off for his friends. All the guys did it.
When Tracy arrived at home, her neighbor, Raheema, was at the door. Tracy was tempted to gossip with her like she had done with Mercedes, yet she quickly realized that their interests in life were different. All Raheema talked about was what the teachers did in school. She was not interested in any of Tracy’s boy stories. Nevertheless, they decided to chat. Tracy went into Raheema’s house, getting out of the cold.
Raheema said, “All you talk about is boys, and I remember when you didn’t even like them.”
“Well, all I know is that Todd was cute. And you should have talked to him.”
“Don’t play dumb with me, Tracy. I heard about you kissing him in the driveway.”
Tracy twisted her lips. “You didn’t want him.” She had moved on from Amir and on to his friend Todd.
Raheema huffed, “I know I didn’t. I don’t want any boys, thank you.”
“Oh, you think you so smart, don’t ’chew?”
“No, but I’m not getting used by any boy, that’s for sure.”
“How you know?”
“Because I won’t talk to them,” Raheema answered frankly. “That’s why I’m going into dance class, to do something that doesn’t involve boys.”
“What dance class?” Tracy asked, feeling left out. Football season and cheerleading were over.
“None of your business,” Raheema snapped. She had outdone Tracy again.
Tracy went home and waited impatiently for her mother to arrive with her brother. She wanted the 4-1-1 on Raheema’s dance class, and she had a fool-proof plan of how to get it.
“Hey mom, I think it would be good for me to be in a dance class. You know how bored I get after doing my homework.”
“Yeah, okay then,” Patti responded, while taking off her son’s coat and hat. “Where is it at and all?”
Tracy grinned. “I don’t know all that, but Ra-Ra’s in it, so Ms. Beth probably knows.”
Patti called Beth about the dance class. It was held near Patti’s sister Tanya’s house in Logan. Patti called Tanya to see if she wanted Patrice, or “Reese,” as they called her, to take dance lessons, too. Tracy didn’t expect that. But Reese was not that bad when she was not around her other cousins, Trish and Marie. Reese took sides with them rather than with Tracy because she was afraid of them.
On the first day of dance, their instructor went over the calendar schedule for the four-month dance session. During their first exercises, Tracy snickered at her cousin Reese’s form, while Raheema did the same to her. For all three of them, it was more hard work than expected. Tracy found out rather quickly that dance was definitely more complicated than cheerleading.
A flock of rough boys played basketball inside of the recreation center where the girls held their dance lessons. The boys watched the girls with excitement. Every year the boys anticipated the pretty new girls that dance classes attracted to their rec center. It had become a ritual, and it was only a matter of time before they would start to mingle with the girls. On Tracy’s third night of class, a boy finally approached her.
“Ay girl, you cute as shit,” he told her. “Why don’t you come over here and talk to me when you finish?” he said.
“Thank you,” Tracy responded to him. She began to smile in his direction before she took a good look at him. Once she got a better look at him, Tracy thought that he was ugly. “That’s okay. My mom is coming to get me,” she told him.
The forward boy persisted. “So what? She ain’t here yet.”
Tracy lied and said, “Well, I have a boyfriend.”
The boy then got an attitude and grimaced at her. “Dude ain’t here either,” he said, walking closer to her.
Tracy scrambled to her feet from her stretching position. “Naw, that’s all right,” she said. The boy then moved as if he was about to grab her. Tracy quickly dashed toward the dance instructor. “Ms. Hamilton, that boy is after me,” she squealed.
“Leave her alone, Ricky!” Ms. Hamilton screamed at the boy.
The boy smiled. “Aw, I was just playin’ with her, Ms. Hamilton, that’s all.”
Tracy was excited about the close call when her mother arrived. She told Patti what happened, and her mother laughed good and hard. Raheema rode home with them after Patti had dropped her niece, Reese, off.
“Hey, dad. What’s up?” Tracy perked when she had arrived home with her mother.
Dave sat watching television with his son. He looked at Tracy as if he was in shock. “Damn! Who ar
e you?” he responded, jokingly.
They smiled at each other and shared a laugh.
“She just blossomed like that overnight,” Patti told him with a grin. It was Dave’s first time seeing his daughter in a leotard.
Dave said, “Come here and turn around.” Tracy felt embarrassed as she turned around in her baby-blue tights. “Gir-r-r-l, you got a big butt back there,” Dave said with a laugh.
Tracy gushed, “Yup, dad, I grew. Didn’t I?”
“You damn sure did. Your mother’s gonna have to put a curfew on you now.”
Patti said nothing.
Tracy smirked as she sat down beside him. “Yup, dad, this ugly boy tried to talk to me today,” she told him.
“Did you give him your phone number?”
Tracy looked disgusted. “No, that boy looked like a monster.”
Dave grinned. “Those are the best ones. They’ll do anything for you.”
Patti had had enough. She marched to her usual spot in the kitchen. She was no longer crazy about seeing Dave as long as he insisted on playing presto man, popping in and out of their lives.
“Naw, dad, you can have that. My man has to look good,” Tracy was telling him.
Patti came back out from the kitchen wearing her apron. “How was your dance class, other than the boy?”
Tracy shrugged. “I mean, it was okay. It’s a lot of work though.”
Little Jason jumped up on Tracy’s lap to get some attention.
“Get off of me, boy,” she huffed, pushing him away.
“Stop, Tracy. He’s just being friendly,” Patti reasoned.
“I’m tired of him jumping all over me, mom.”
Dave grimaced. “Oh, you’re that mature now, hunh?” he asked. “I remember when you were running around here with a snotty nose and doo-doo stains in your drawers.”
Tracy threw her hands over her ears in embarrassment. Dave and Patti laughed as she tried to block them out.
Patti asked, “How are you getting along with Reese?”