Page 21 of The Shoma


  “I’m sorry about earlier. Ameana had no right to say that,” Alex offers.

  “That’s never stopped her before,” I reply.

  “Maybe it’s the pregnancy that’s making her…reckless.”

  “She’s always been…herself.”

  “Still, it’s messed up and you don’t deserve that.”

  I shake my head and scoff.

  “And what do I deserve, Alex?”

  “Well, for one thing, you deserve to be fed.”

  “I told you, eating takes a back seat. I think there’s a vending machine here, somewhere. I will get something later.”

  “You could do that or you could go someplace that would make up for all the meals you have been forced to miss.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Come on, I’ll show you.”

  I hesitate for a moment, but then my stomach reminds me that we haven’t eaten in forever. Also, it would be kind of nice to eat with someone who can actually join me and take a few bites (without disappearing, that is).

  So, he calls for a cab and ten minutes later, we are inside the car. He whispers something to the driver and we take off into the night. Alex tells me he heard about the event we’re going to from one of the couples in the hotel.

  “And what event would that be?” I ask.

  “Look,” he says, signaling towards the sky.

  “Seriously?” I ask. Standing several feet in the air is a huge Ferris wheel with dazzling lights.

  “I used to love fairs! How did you know?” I say, sounding like a kid.

  “I didn’t, but you seem like the kind of girl that liked simple, down to earth things like a night at the fair. Also, something in your eyes told me you would understand the true value of a fried Twinkie.”

  “They have that?” I ask, thoroughly impressed.

  “Yes, along with everything else. I checked and according to the locals, this is the last night of the county fair and that’s when they pull out all the stops.”

  We get out of the cab and I am a few yards away from a vast field with loud music, lights, and all the junk food a girl could want, but I don’t walk towards it. Or run, like I want to. Alex studies me.

  “Emerson, c’mon, let’s go,” he pushes, excitedly.

  “I don’t know, maybe we should go back. I mean, we are on a mission,” I remind him.

  “Yes, but the rest of team gets to take a break, why can’t we?”

  “I don’t know…”

  “I’m not going to try to convince you. I’m not even going to mention the fact that there’s nothing we can do until morning, in terms of the mission. All I am going to say are three words. Then after these three words, you can do whatever you want.”

  “Fine, what are the three words?” I ask, fearing I would regret it.

  “Deep. Fried. Oreo.”

  “Let’s go!”

  As we enter under the archway, I try and take in the scene. The crowd is filled with excited kids, couples holding hands and families sharing a laugh. There are dozens of game booths; each one uses brightly colored light bulbs in a dazzling pattern to attract costumers. They also feature prizes that range from colorful spinning key chains to giant life size stuffed pandas.

  The rides range from child friendly to terrifying and adventurous. The people on the Ferris wheel sequel in delight as they spin around. The bumper cars are filled with people my age; they happily crash into their friends to see who can cause the most damage.

  “I don’t even know where to start,” I confess.

  “I don’t know about you, but I’m headed for the food,” Alex says with big grin on his face.

  “I should at least text the team, so they know where we are.”

  “Do it after, I’m starving,” Alex insists.

  “Okay…Marcus will worry though…” I say, mostly to myself.

  “We’re only fifteen minutes away from the hotel,” he reminds me.

  “I know but…”

  “Don’t you ever want a break from…all of it?” He asks.

  “Well yeah, sometimes.”

  “Okay, well this is your chance. Let’s just have a ‘Guardian free’ hour or two,” he urges.

  “I don’t know…”

  “You need a human moment. You deserve that, but it’s up to you. I can call a cab and we can head back, if that’s what you really want.”

  “You think they have turkey legs? I’ve always wanted to try it,” I admit.

  Alex points to a neon says that says, “Jumbo Turkey Legs w/ Bacon.”

  “Okay, I’m in,” I reply.

  “Are you sure?” He asks.

  “Yes.”

  “And no mission talk, right?”

  “Right,” I reply.

  He smiles brightly and we head to the food booth with the massive grill. When we get there, we are greeted by the delicious scent of BBQ and bacon.

  “You’re kind of small, so I’m guessing a whole one will be too much for you,” he says, as we gawk at the rows of plump turkey legs.

  “Wait, is that a challenge? You think you can out-eat me? Don’t let my size fool you,” I warn him.

  “Please, you’ll be down for the count after three bites,” he says, shaking his head.

  “Okay, we’ll see who can and can’t keep up,” I counter.

  “What does the winner get?” He asks.

  “The winner gets to pick the most disgusting thing here and the loser has to eat it,” I reply.

  “Done.”

  We order two turkey legs wrapped with bacon. Alex looks at me then takes a massive bite. I know he’s trying to intimidate me, but it’s not gonna work. I take an even bigger bite out of my mine. He laughs so much he nearly drops his turkey leg.

  We roam around the fair, seeking the tastiest, most decadent foods we can find. It turns out almost everything here is deep fried or wrapped in bacon. I’m in heaven. We have fried cheese on a stick, jumbo bacon wrapped corn dogs, fried ice cream, cheeseburgers, fried butter balls, hot beef, sundaes, Kool-Aid pickles, fried jelly beans and deep fried Coca Cola.

  The more absurd the food, the harder we laugh as we shove it in our mouths. Alex may be bigger and taller than me, but he soon realizes he is no match for me. He marvels at how much I can actually pig out.

  “You should be in the Guinness book of records.”

  I laugh and finish the last bite of our latest challenge, the Honey Glazed Doughnut Burger.

  “How are you able to eat all that?” He asks.

  “It’s a talent,” I boast.

  “Okay, I give up, you win,” he admits.

  “Yes!!!” I shout, jumping up and down.

  “Wow, you are nuts, you know that?”

  “I’m also the winner. So I get to choose what you eat next,” I say, glancing around for the worst possible foods.

  “Okay, but be kind,” he begs.

  “I got it,” I say, rushing over to a nearby booth.

  “Emerson, no. I’m not eating that,” he says, unable to keep from laughing.

  “Oh, c’mon, don’t be a baby,” I push.

  We are standing in front of a booth that proudly serves kabobs; python kabobs.

  “I can’t eat a snake,” he argues.

  “Hey, I believe in you, Alex. You can do this,” I push.

  He takes the kabob into his mouth. I watch, amazed, as he goes to take a bite, but at the last second he spits it out. I have a long, hearty laugh at his expense. He gets down on his knees and bows down to me.

  “You, Emerson, are the queen of all things fried,” he says.

  “Yes! Yes! Bow down to the queen,” I reply with a fake evil laugh.

  We share a laugh and I help him up. We head over to the game booths, where I win a huge stuffed alligator, by shooting into the clown’s mouth faster and harder than anyone else. I hand the giant alligator to Alex and tell him I will have the staff deep-fry it for him.

  Finally, tired from all the eating and games, we grab a Gi
nger Ale soda to settle our stomachs and sit on a bench on the outskirts of the food area. From here, we have a perfect view of the bustling fair.

  We’re far enough away that music is now merely in the background. There’s no one else but us. For the next few moments, we sit in a silence, gazing at the night sky above us; it’s filled with stars. And for the first time in a long time, the mission and the danger seem far away.

  “My brother would have loved this,” Alex says, almost to himself.

  “Really, he doesn’t seem like a ‘simple pleasures’ kind of guy, from what I heard about him.”

  “He would have liked it because he could get girls here. He liked anywhere where girls are likely to let their guard down. That way he could take advantage of them. Junior was kind of a jerk,” Alex admits.

  “Oh.”

  “It’s crazy, one minute you’re arguing with someone and the next, they’re gone. I mean Junior and I never got along, but he was my brother and I loved him. I don’t know how to process him just not being around anymore.”

  “I know what you mean. Sometimes, I swear I hear my mom in the apartment.”

  “When I heard Junior died, I thought it was a mistake because my brother always managed to get himself out of trouble. He had a way with people. One time he got his hands on a military uniform and convinced a girl to flash him, for the good of the nation.”

  “Some girl actually fell for that?” I ask.

  “I know, crazy right?”

  “Yeah, a little,” I admit.

  “I wish I were like him.”

  “You said he was a jerk.”

  “He was, but he was also really…confident. He saw what he wanted and he went after it. I admire that.”

  “Well maybe you have a little of that in you, too,” I offer.

  “No, if I did I would…”

  “You would what?”

  “I’d do this.”

  Before I know what’s happening, Alex leans in and presses his lips to mine. I’m caught off guard. I can’t think, all I can do is feel; feel his soft warm lips graze mine. His touch causes a sensation to dance down my spine. Once I feel his tongue explore my mouth, the hairs on my neck and arms stand up. Blood rushes to my face and my pulse races. His kiss is intoxicating.

  Suddenly, someone calls my name and pulls me out of the trance Alex’s kiss put me in. I break off contact with Alex and turn around. Standing just a few yards away is Jay. He’s looking at me with intense disappointment. Next to him are Miku, Ameana, Eta, Rage and Marcus…

  CHAPTER TWENTY‐TWO:

  LIKE HELL

  Oh shit! What did I just do? What. Did. I. Just. Do? WHAT DID I JUST DO!

  How could I have let Alex kiss me? What the hell, Emmy? Shit!

  In my head, everyone in the world disappears except for Marcus. I expect him to react with anger, frustration…rage. Instead, the First Guardian remains eerily calm. He just stares at me, hardly blinking, but I know him well. There is an undercurrent of fury that runs through his veins. And while his demeanor is that of a controlled leader, his penetrating glare reveals an irate and lethal Angel.

  “Marcus, I…” I can’t finish my sentence, because I have no idea what to say.

  It seems like a lifetime before Marcus speaks. When he does, he does not speak to me; he addresses Alex. He uses a freezing tone that causes me to shiver with fear and uncertainty. I have never been afraid of Marcus until right now.

  “Alex, if you take a member of my team anywhere without telling me again, I’ll kill you.”

  It’s not just what he says, it’s the “matter of fact” tone in which he says it. No one here has any doubt that Marcus would, in fact, take Alex’s life. What is also freaking me out is that Marcus makes no mention of the kiss. What’s going on?

  “We should head back. Marcus and Emmy need to talk alone,” Eta says.

  “We don’t need to talk,” Marcus says, in the same official tone as before.

  I exhale deeply, and then bite my lower lip. The anxiety washing over me makes me regret having eaten so much. He’s so hurt and broken, he’s chosen to shut down and go into “leader” mode.

  “Can you guys give us a minute?” I ask the team.

  “Yeah, sure,” Rage replies.

  Ameana is fuming, but thankfully she leaves without having an outburst. Miku and Jay leave hand in hand. Eta and Alex head off with them.

  “Baby, I’m so sorry,” I say as I frantically reach out for him.

  “Okay,” he says simply.

  He starts to head towards the exit.

  “Wait, that’s it?” I ask.

  “Yeah,” he says quickly.

  “Look, I know it doesn’t make it right, but he kissed me and I didn’t know it was coming.”

  “Okay.”

  “Marcus, don’t do this; don’t shut me out. Please, talk to me.”

  “There’s nothing to say. It happened and now we move on.”

  “That can’t be it,” I push.

  “You wanted to get revenge for me and Bianca, and now you have, so congratulations.”

  “What? No, Marcus that’s not what this was. This had nothing to do with wanting to get back at you,” I promise him.

  “No, it has to be that,” he reasons calmly.

  “Marcus, it’s not about revenge.”

  “It has to be.”

  “Why?”

  “BECAUSE IF YOU WEREN’T KISSING HIM TO GET BACK AT ME, THEN YOU WERE KISSING HIM BECAUSE YOU WANT HIM, AND I DON’T KNOW HOW TO FUCKING DEAL WITH THAT. TELL ME HOW TO DEAL WITH THAT!!”

  His voice cracks with ire and bitter disappoint; in all the time I’ve known him, this is the most distraught he’s ever been. He waits for my reply, but I don’t say anything because whatever I say will only hurt him more. Tears well up in my eyes and my lips quiver.

  “No! No! No! Don’t you dare fucking cry!” Marcus shouts at me.

  “Okay,” I whisper. However, I’m unable to stop.

  “Tell me you did this to be petty and vengeful. Tell me you kissed Alex to hurt me,” he orders.

  “That’s not it.”

  “That’s too bad, because it would have been the perfect revenge. Me coming in here with the whole team to find you and him…Emmy, you missed a great opportunity to let me have some of my own medicine,” he says contemptuously.

  “Marcus, I’m sorry.”

  “No, don’t be sorry. You finally got me back. And you did it so well, you managed to kill me with just one little kiss. I commend you. It takes skill to hurt someone that deeply.”

  “Again, I wasn’t trying to hurt you.”

  “Be honest with me. I know I hurt you in the past, but did I deserve this? This right here, right now? Did I deserve that?”

  “No.”

  “Then why, why did you do this?” He begs.

  “I just…I don’t even know what happened. We just went to blow off some steam. And then we were…and I don’t…I’m so sorry. Please, please forgive me,” I go over to him and take his hand. Devastated, he pulls away.

  “I’m sorry, but this wasn’t intentional,” I promise.

  “Are you in love with him?” He asks, now completely distraught.

  “No.”

  “But you have feelings for him, right?”

  “I…I don’t know.”

  “BULLSHIT!”

  “Marcus, please try to understand.”

  “Understand what?”

  “I was just…there’s so much going on…there’s always so much going on…”

  “If you didn’t kiss him to get back at me, then you kissed him because you want to be with him. I mean, that’s the only other explanation. You want to be with Alex.”

  “It’s not that simple,” I swear.

  “The hell it’s not! You kissed Alex because you’re falling in love with him.”

  “No.”

  “THEN WHY THE FUCK DID YOU KISS HIM?!”

  “Because I—”

  “—Because you l
ove him!”

  “No!”

  “THEN WHY?”

  “I…”

  “WHY?”

  “Marcus please—”

  “WHY?”

  “I don’t…”

  “WHY?” He rages.

  “BECAUSE I’M TIRED OF SHARING!!”

  “What?” He asks, bewildered and confused.

  “I kissed Alex because I wanted to know what it was like to have a guy all to myself,” I reply sadly.

  “I don’t get it,” he admits.

  “I love you so much, Marcus, but I have to share you with everyone; the team, the Demons, the Paras, the Quo, the Council...I wanted to know what it would feel like to be the only person that mattered to a guy.”

  “And how was it?” He asks.

  I can’t bring myself to answer him. Or even look in his eyes. He shakes his head in disbelief and utter misery.

  He walks over to the metal fence a few yards away and leans on it as if he’s incapable of holding his own weight. He closes his eyes and I can practically see the weight of my betrayal bearing down on him.

  “I didn’t think anything could hurt more than my mother killing me, but…wow, this actually…this is…this hurts so much more,” he admits quietly.

  I walk over to him, trembling with every step. I need to ask him this question, but I am deathly afraid of what his answer will be.

  “Marcus, are we over?” I ask, as tears leak down my cheeks.

  “When I had to marry Bianca, it tore you apart. Tonight, seeing you kiss Alex completely shredded what there was of me. Is there even enough ‘you’ and ‘me’ to make an ‘us?’”

  “I’m sorry, baby. I’m so sorry,” I plead.

  “To be honest, I want to fly away from you and never look back. I want to break everything in sight and tell you to go to hell, and that I am done with you.”

  No,no,no. Please, no…

  “That’s what always happens, one of us walks away. But not this time. I’m not running anymore, Emmy. I’m going to hold onto you. And I’m going to love you until you say you want out. Please don’t say you want out.”

  I wrap my arms around him and cry into his chest.

  “I don’t want out, Marcus, I don’t want out.”

  He’s still angry and hurt, I know that. And we still have issues to resolve. But, standing here in his arms, knowing that he wants to flee, but has decided to stay; that just lets me know one thing for sure. The ‘Marcus and Emmy’ roller-coaster ride is over. From now on, we are on solid ground.