CHAPTER II
MANSERS
The introduction of Mrs. David Arnold Duke, nee Methodist, to themembers of her husband's Presbyterian flock, was, for the most part,consummated with grace and dignity. Only one untoward incidentlingered in her memory to cloud her lovely face with annoyance.
In honor of his very first honeymoon, hence his first opportunity toescort a beautiful and blushing bride to the cozy little manse he hadso painstakingly prepared for her reception, the Reverend Davidindulged in the unwonted luxury of a taxicab. And happy in theconsciousness of being absolutely correct as to detail, they weredriven slowly down the beautifully shaded avenues of the Heights, oneof the many charming suburbs of St. Louis,--aware of the scrutiny ofinterested eyes from the sheltering curtains of many windows.
Being born and bred in the ministry, Carol acquitted herself properlybefore the public eye. But once inside the guarding doors of thedarling manse, secure from the condemning witness of even the least ofthe fold, she danced and sang and exulted as the very young, and veryglad, must do to find expression.
Their first dinner in the manse was more of a social triumph than aculinary success. The coffee was nectar, though a trifle overboiled.The gravy was sweet as honey, but rather inclined to be lumpy. And thesteak tasted like fried chicken, though Carol had peppered it twice andsalted it not at all. It wasn't her fault, however, for the salt andpepper shakers in her "perfectly irresistible" kitchen cabinet wereexactly alike,--and how was she to know she was getting the same onetwice?
Anyhow, although they started very properly with plates on oppositesides of the round table, by the time they reached dessert their chairswere just half way round from where they began the meal, and the saladdishes were so close together that half the time they ate from one andhalf the time from the other. And when it was all over, they pushedthe dishes back and clasped their hands promiscuously together andtalked with youthful passion of what they were going to do, and howwonderful their opportunity for service was, and what revolutions theywere going to work in the lives of the nice, but no doubt prosymansers, and how desperately they loved each other. And it was goingto last forever and ever and ever.
So far they were just Everybride and Everygroom. Their hearts sang andthe manse was more gorgeous than any mansion on earth, and all theworld was good and sweet, and they couldn't possibly ever make any kindof a mistake or blunder, for love was guiding them,--and could purelove lead astray?
David at last looked at his watch and said, rather hurriedly:
"By the way, I imagine a few of our young people will drop in to-nightfor a first smile from the manse lady."
Carol leaped from her chair, jerked off the big kitchen apron, and flewup the stairs with never a word. When David followed more slowly, hefound her already painstakingly dusting her matchless skin with velvetypowder.
"I got a brand new box of powder, David, the very last thing I did,"she began, as he entered the room. "When this is gone, I'll resort tocheaper kinds. You see, father's had such a lot of experience withgirls and complexions that he just naturally expects them to beexpensive--and would very likely be confused and hurt if things werechanged. But I can imagine what a shock it would be to you right atthe start."
David assured her that any powder which added to the wonder of thatmost wonderful complexion was well worth any price. But Carol shookher head sagely.
"It's a dollar a box, my dear, and very tiny boxes at that. Now don'ttalk any more for I must fix my hair and dress, and--I want to lookperfectly darling or they won't like me, and then they will not putanything in the collections and the heathens and we will starvetogether. Oh, will you buckle my slippers? Thanks. Here's half akiss for your kindness. Oh, David, dear, do run along and don't botherme, for suppose some one should get here before I am all fixed, and--Shall I wear this little gray thing? It makes me look very, verysensible, you know, and--er--well, pretty, too. One can be pretty aswell as sensible, and I think it's a Christian duty to do it. David, Ishall never be ready. I can not be talked to, and make myselfbeautiful all at once. Dear, please go and say your prayers, and askGod to make them love me, will you? For it is very important, and--If I act old, and dignified, they will think I am appropriate at least,won't they? Oh, this horrible dress, I never can reach the hooks.Will you try, David, there's my nice old boy. Oh, are you going down?Well, I suppose one of us ought to be ready for them,--run along,--it'slonesome without you,--but I have to powder my face, and-- Oh, thatwas just the preliminary. The conclusion is always the same. Bye,dearest." Then, solemnly, to her mirror, she said, "Isn't he theblessedest old thing that ever was? My, I am glad Prudence got marriedso long ago, or he might have wanted her instead of me. I don'tsuppose the mansers could possibly object to a complexion like mine. Ican get a certificate from father to prove it is genuine, if they don'tbelieve it."
Then she gave her full attention to tucking up tiny, straying curlswith invisible hair pins, and was quite startled when David calledsuddenly:
"Hurry up, Carol, I am waiting for you."
"Oh, bless its heart, I forgot all about it. I am coming."
Gaily she ran down the stairs, parted the curtains into the living-roomand said:
"Why are you sitting in the dark, David? Headache, or just plainsentimental? Where are you?"
"Over here," he said, in a curious, quiet voice.
She groped her way into the center of the room and clutched his arms."David," she said, laughing a little nervously, "here goes the lastgasp of my dear old Methodist fervor."
"Why, Carol--" he interrupted.
"Just a minute, honey. After this I am going to be settled and solemnand when I feel perfectly glorious I'll just say, 'Very good, thankyou,' and--"
"But, Carol--"
"Yes, dear, just a second. This is my final gasp, my last explosion,my dying outburst. Rah, rah, rah, David. Three cheers and a tiger.Amen! Hallelujah! Hurrah! Down with the traitor, up with the stars!Now it's all over. I am a Presbyterian."
David's burst of laughter was echoed on every side of the room and thelights were switched on, and with a sickening weakness Carol faced theyoung people of her husband's church.
"More Presbyterians, dear, a whole houseful of them. They wanted tosurprise you, but you have turned the tables on them. This is my wife,Mrs. Duke."
Slowly Carol rallied. She smiled the irresistible smile.
"I am so glad to meet you," she said, softly, "I know we are going tolike each other. Aren't you glad you got here in time to see me becomePresbyterian? David, why didn't you warn me that surprise parties werestill stylish? I thought they had gone out."
Carol watched very, very closely all that evening, and she could notsee one particle of difference between these mansers and the youngfolks in the Methodist Church in Mount Mark, Iowa. They told funnystories, and laughed immoderately at them. The young men gave thelatest demonstrations of vaudeville trickery, and the girls applaudedas warmly as if they had not seen the same bits performed in theoriginal. They asked David if they might dance in the kitchen, andDavid smilingly begged them to spare his manse the disgrace, and todance themselves home if they couldn't be more restrained. The youngmen put in an application for Mrs. Duke as teacher of the Young Men'sBible Class, and David sternly vetoed the measure. The young ladiesasked Carol what kind of powder she used, and however she got her hairup in that most marvelous manner.
And Carol decided it was not going to be such a burden after all, andthought perhaps she might make a regular pillar in time.
When, as she later met the elder ones of the church, and was invariablygreeted with a smiling, "How is our little Methodist to-day," shebitterly swallowed her grief and answered with a brightness all assumed:
"Turned Presbyterian, thank you."
But to David she said:
"I did seriously and religiously ask the Lord to let me get introducedto the mansers without disgracing myself, and I am just a teeny bitdisappointed
because He went back on me in such a crisis."
But David, wise minister and able exponent of his faith, said quickly:
"He didn't go back on you, Carol. It was the best kind of anintroduction, and He stood by you right through. They were more afraidof you than you were of them. You might have been stiff and reserved,and they would have been cold and self-conscious, and it would havebeen ghastly for every one. But your break broke the ice right off.You were perfectly natural."
"Hum,--yes--natural enough, I suppose. But it wasn't dignified, andwhy do you suppose I have been practising dignity these last ten years?"