The first month of being away from Parker was pure and utter torture. It was worse than the time he had ended things with me. Now I felt like a piece of me was being ripped apart. I found myself waking up during the night screaming for no apparent reason only to fall back into a deep sleep.
My wounds from Devin’s touch were finally starting to heal but the feeling of him all over me, would never go away. Not until I had Parker back to help me. To break me down and mold me into a new and stronger person. A tougher woman.
I came to find out that Parker was staying with Greyson Mercer and his biker club. Collin Vain had joined them as well. Apparently the guy had always been around, I just never saw him. That was the point, Parker told me.
“How about some chips?” Liz asked me, interrupting my thoughts.
I smiled up at her, curling my feet under me and nodded.
“Scary movie or chick flick?” Aidan pulled out a DVD. “Scary movie,” he answered for us.
“Why ask when you’re not going to wait for the answer?” Liz threw a chip at him.
“Keep doing that, pet, and I’ll bend you over my lap,” he growled.
Liz stuck her tongue out at him. “Not in front of Keely, you won’t.”
He turned to her. “You’re spending the night here. I’ll just take you to the guest room that you’re staying in.”
“Why, we can’t leave Keely all alone.” Liz pouted.
I shook my head, laughing. “You guys are too much. I don’t care what you do. Just please clean up the mess. I don’t want Parker’s housekeeper, Anne, having to deal with that.”
Aidan clutched his chest. “We are very clean people.”
I raised an eyebrow.
“Yeah, okay.” Aidan chuckled and slid the DVD into the player. He pulled Liz to her feet before sitting behind her. He pointed to the floor.
She knelt, leaning her head against his knee.
My chest clenched at the sight. “I’m…would you guys be offended if I went to bed early?”
“Not at all. I’m so sorry.” Liz gave me a hug.
“It’s…it’s not you guys. I just…I’m tired.”
They both nodded.
Deciding I needed some air first, I headed into the back yard. Every so often, I would bring out a tray of sandwiches and fruit, leaving it for the men that watched me and the house and every time I came back for the dishes, they were empty. It reminded me of the stories about people leaving out food for animals and the only time they would come out was when you left.
“I know you guys are still out there. I can feel you, watching me,” I said into the empty air. I didn’t know if the men belonged to the CIA, the FBI, or some other government agency or if they were just Parker’s men. No one told me and I didn’t care to ask.
“I…” I knelt, brushing my fingers through the cool green grass. “I just want to thank you. For everything.” No reply came of course but at one point, I heard a shuffling. “If you talk to Parker…” I swallowed past the lump that had formed in my throat. “Please tell him that I love him and that I…that I miss him.” My shoulders slumped. “I miss him,” I whispered.
Rising to my feet, I brushed off the strands of grass that were stuck to my knees. Taking a breath, I headed back into the house.
Making my way to The Room of Anticipation, I realized that I had never seen Parker’s actual bedroom. I knew it was on the second floor but that was it. Deciding on a change of course, I headed up there. But as my footsteps neared his room, the anxiety and pain clutched at my soul.
The phone in my hand vibrated and I jumped, forgetting that I was carrying it. “Hello?”
“Keely,” Parker purred.
A sob tore through my body and I fell to my knees. “Oh God, Parker.”
“Hi my beautiful pet.”
“Hi,” I whispered, my body shaking.
“Don’t cry.”
“I miss you. So damn much. I feel like a part of me left with you.”
“I know.” His voice was thick. “I know.”
“Are you okay?”
He sighed. “I am. For now.” He cleared his throat. “What are you doing, beautiful one?”
“I’m…I’m about to head to your bedroom. I realized I haven’t seen it yet and I need as much of you as possible.”
“Last door on your left. It’s not locked like our room.”
My heart swelled. “It’s our room?”
“Yes, pet. It is. We’ll discuss more about that when I get back but right now I just need to hear your voice.”
“Where are you?” I asked, pushing open the door that led to his bedroom.
“At the clubhouse still. Some shit went down so I’m laying low.”
I flicked on the light. “Should I be worried?”
“No. You won’t see them, but I have men watching the cottage. Anne brings in groceries so you won’t have to worry about food or money.”
I nodded, understanding what he was saying.
“I don’t want to hold you captive but I want you safe. Troy and Patrick can come and go as they please but you…”
“I know, Parker.” My eyes slid around the room.
“Tell me what you see.”
“A large bed but nothing like the one in the basement. Red sheets this time and dark wood. The carpet is soft under my feet,” I said, squishing my toes into the plush carpet.
“What else?”
“Nothing, really. This room doesn’t scream you though.” I pulled open his closet door. “Why would a man need a walk-in closet?” I teased, running my fingers over the fabric of his suits.
“Why don’t you open the door to the second closet and then tell me if the room screams me or not.”
“I doubt it.” I did as he said and gasped.
He chuckled. “You were saying?”
Leather objects stared back at me. What I learned were floggers hung in all different sizes on the wall. Red and black whips stared back at me. Every kinky toy you could imagine was in that closet. “Why aren’t these items downstairs?”
“You never know when the time is right and you need a little punishment. Kind of kills the mood when I have to run all the way downstairs.”
I laughed. “True.”
“Now, pet.”
My stomach tumbled at the change in tone. “Yes, Sir?”
“You’re learning. I’m impressed.”
I stood a little taller at his praise. “Thank you.”
“Have you been opening your hearts?”
“Yes.”
“Good girl. Tell me some of them.”
I thought a moment. “The one from today told me to smile.”
“And did you?”
I rubbed my thumb over the toe of his black leather shoe. It was so polished and shiny that I could see my reflection in it. “I’m smiling now.”
He grunted in response. “Tell me more.”
“One said for me to relax. Another told me to take a bubble bath. One also told me to light a candle and pour the wax on my nipple.”
“And did you?”
My cheeks heated. “It took me a little bit to get the courage but yes, I did.”
“I’m so proud of you, angel. I’m going to come back and you’ll be a changed woman.”
“I’m trying to learn as much as I can without you here.”
“I know. The hearts range in different levels. You’ll get there and we’ll teach each other. Now go lay on the bed but strip completely before doing so.”
I left the closet and took off my clothes before sliding under the cool satin of the sheets.
“How’s your wrist?”
Twisting it back and forth in front of me, I shrugged. “It’s fine. I had the cast taken off a couple days ago. It has its tender moments when the weather is bad but I did some physical therapy to help.”
“How’s…how’s everything else?”
I hesitated, knowing he was referring to Devin’s abuse on my lower body. “It’s healing,” was al
l I said.
“I’m sorry. For you seeing me like that but most of all, for hurting you. I didn’t…I didn’t want that.”
“I know, my love. Do you think Devin knew that you were setting him up and that’s why he made you push me out of the car?” I asked, running my fingers through the soft fur on a red throw pillow.
“I’m not sure. I thought of that myself, actually. Either way, it shouldn’t have gone down like that. I’ll keep apologizing to you for the rest of my life. I will make it up to you, pet.”
Snuggling into the pillows, I inhaled, trying to remember the scent of him when I saw a bottle of cologne on the end table. “I miss your smell,” I whispered, spraying the cologne on his pillows. The scent of leather and man wafted into my nostrils, easing my aching body.
“I miss your smell on my skin.” His voice deepened. “Touch yourself for me.”
I hesitated. “You want me to do what?”
“Keely.”
Biting my bottom lip, I slid my hand down my inner thigh. It had been so long since I felt a gentle touch from my lover. Butterflies and anxiety swirled in my gut, memories of that horrible day forcing their way into my mind.
“Breathe, pet. It’s just you and me. Listen to my voice. Imagine me there with you. Even though I’m not physically there, I’m all around you. The air that flows through your lungs. The blood that swims through your veins. The thump-thump of your heart as it skips a beat when you think about me.”
My eyes fluttered closed, my hand reaching my center.
“Picture me kissing you, my tongue deep inside of your body, licking you up like an ice-cream cone.”
I panted, my finger brushing over my clit. Slowly, back and forth.
“Remember my lips sliding along your skin. My cock full and throbbing inside of you. I can feel every ripple, every curve of your heat as I slowly make love to your body.”
I moaned, arching my back. “Parker.”
“That’s it, beautiful. Come for me. Let me hear the sweet sounds of your pleasure that I so terribly miss.”
“I need you.” I whimpered, a tingle spreading over my skin. A fine sheet of sweat coated my body as my hips undulated against the touch of my hand.
“You have me. Forever. And always. Three more months.” He groaned. “Fuck, I’m so hard for you.”
“Tell me,” I begged, licking my lips.
“I can feel your sweet body sliding down my cock. The look of pleasure exploding across your beautiful face. The purrs. Moans. Breaths of passion as I devour your body.”
Tears welled in my eyes, ecstasy ensnaring me in a blanket of divine bliss. “More.”
Parker groaned. “My hand is wrapped around my dick but God, nothing feels or comes close to your touch. Your heat. Shit, pet.”
Images of his large hand stroking his thick length popped into my mind. His veiny ridge swelling under his touch. The tip of his cock turning purple as he rode out his release. Always waiting. Taking control until he allowed himself to come.
“Parker. Come for me, my love.”
His heavy breathing was music to my ears as I joined him in the dance of passion that passed between us.
“I love you,” I cried out, an explosion erupting through me. It hit me hard, leaving me breathless.
As he grunted through his own release, I sighed, rolling onto my stomach.
“Tell me what other hearts you’ve opened.”
I told him. From the very first one. Some were difficult and they were meant to challenge me but what was hard about them was that he wasn’t with me. He knew that. That’s why he wrote them down.
“A lot of them, I couldn’t do,” I confessed.
“Why not?”
“Because I was scared and…I guess I’m not mentally ready.” I yawned. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. Place me on speaker phone. I want you to fall asleep to my voice.”
And I did. For that night and the following nights. Even if he couldn’t call me, he would send me voice recordings and I would play them over and over again. If only I had them a month ago but it was better late than never.
“Keely. My beautiful pet. I love you. So damn much. My feelings for you are intense. They control me. I love you so hard it hurts. I can feel you in my soul. I love you.”
My body stirred, my skin tingling with remnants from the caress of the deep voice that still flowed around me. I was lightheaded, the room spinning around me from being woken up out of a deep sleep.
Rubbing my eyes, I sat up and gasped when I saw red rose petals blanketing the covers of the bed. Tall black candles cascaded around the room, leaving our special place in a romantic glow.
I frowned and pulled back the covers before rising to my feet. “Hello?” I called out. Maybe I was dreaming. How rose petals and candles got in the room was beyond me. When no answer came, I scrubbed the sleep out of my eyes.
A sheer nightie caught my eye that was draped over the back of a chair. Something told me to put it on. I listened to that little voice in my head, guiding me, keeping me from losing my mind. I liked to think that it was Parker deep in my thoughts. I could hear him, constantly.
“Before I walk into a room, you will feel me. You will crave the power of my seduction.”
I smiled to myself, slipping the nightgown down my naked body. Taking a step in from the floor-length mirror, I spun around in a slow circle.
It left nothing to the imagination but it made me feel beautiful. It hugged my curves in the right spots. My pink nipples peaked through the sheer material of the item. The dark shadow of my mound, showcased against the thin fabric.
Closing my eyes, I sighed, running my hands down the front of me. Pulling from my inner being, I imagined Parker with me. His rough strong fingers on my shoulders, tugging the straps down my arms.
His soft, full mouth trailing kisses along my upper back. His teeth biting into my skin.
My breath caught, my nipples hardening. Moisture seeped between my thighs but I couldn’t stop the fantasy from playing over my mind. I imagined his hot breath against my neck, his thick erection pressing into the curve of my ass. A moan escaped me, startling me. My eyes popped open, a slight blush spreading on my cheeks.
Scrubbing a hand down my face, that’s when I felt the wetness. Tears. With a heavy heart, I grabbed a robe and headed slowly up the stairs to the main floor.
The house was eerily quiet. Troy and Patrick had gone away for the weekend; I was left alone to wallow in my own self-pity.
I was never truly alone, though. I could sense the men surrounding the house but I never saw them. Just like Parker had said.
The back of my neck tingled, my stomach flipping hard. I shook myself, my gaze moving around the moon-kissed glow of the living room.
Turning on a lamp, I nearly jumped out of my skin when a shadow moved from the corner of the large room. My chin trembled, my eyes welling as the shadow moved closer and closer to me. My body was frozen in place as the darkness turned into the shape of a man and all I could do was stare. At him.
“Parker,” I sobbed.
He grinned but it never reached his eyes. The shell of the strong man I knew, that I hadn’t seen since that horrible day months before, was cracking. He had been broken, torn down, and I could kill Devin for doing that to him.
“Come here, pet.”
The deep rumble of his voice washed over me and I ran to him, falling at his feet, and hugged his leg.
His hand brushed over my head, petting me before he lowered himself to the floor. “My beautiful one.” His voice was thick as he pulled me into his arms.
Sobs wracked my body as I wrapped myself around him, squeezing him with everything in me. I rained kisses on his face, wanting to cover every inch of him. Needing to memorize him in ways I never thought would be possible. “Please…please tell me I’m not dreaming,” I begged, cupping his cheeks.
He swallowed hard, clearing his throat before lifting me in his arms. “You’re not dreaming.”
/>
“Are you back? I have thirty hearts left,” I whispered, keeping my mouth locked with his.
“No, angel. I can’t stay.”
The sobs poured out of me harder. “Please stay.”
“Keely.” His voice was firm as he laid me on the bed. Our bed. His fingers hooked around the thin gold chain at my neck and he kissed the small heart pendant before placing a peck on my forehead.
I noted the black leather trench coat he was wearing. Small lines had formed at the corners of his eyes and lips. His face had hardened. “What happened to you?” I asked, brushing my fingers over his mouth.
He kissed my fingertips, inhaling deep. “Nothing that you can’t fix.”
“How long can you stay?” I ran my hands inside his jacket, pushing it off his strong shoulders.
He shrugged out of the heavy material, lifting his white t-shirt along with it. “Long enough to take you, my beautiful pet, and to explain who I really am.”
My skin vibrated, the cells in my body coming alive. I straddled his lap, massaging my hands over his back when I felt them. Bumpy ridges that were smooth under my touch. “What happened?”
Parker pulled my nightie up and over my head. He glanced down at my mound, brushing his fingers lightly over the sensitive skin. “I’ll kill him.”
“No marks. Everything has healed nicely,” I said softly. “Tell me what happened.”
“What I do isn’t safe, Keely. It comes with repercussions and unfortunately, scars are one of them.” His thumb brushed my lip that held a hint of a scar where Devin had punched me. He had hit me harder than I thought and the split in my lip had turned into a light pink line. You wouldn’t know it was there unless you looked closely.
I kissed Parker’s thumb as it passed along my mouth. “Did your men give you my messages?”
He smiled softly. “Yes. They say thank you for the food as well.”
“I know they can’t eat on the job but it’s the least I can do. It feels a little weird having people watch me and I can’t even see them.” I shrugged. “I…it made me feel closer to you I guess.”
“When I come back, I’m never letting you go.”