“You really have a thing for the sea,” I said. “It’s so damn cute to see you looking at it like a little kid stares longingly at a cookie. Maybe you were a sailor in a past life.”
He scrubbed his hair with his hand. It stood up in short black spikes. “Something tells me that I would more likely have been a pirate.”
“True, but I’m not sure that’s a bad thing.” I pulled my hand from his and ran ahead to the outcropping of slick, algae frosted rocks. “It sort of hurts in bare feet,” I warned as I gingerly stepped onto the first rock. Some of the surface had been eroded into a bowl shape where tiny critters swam in crazy circles trying to stay out of my foot’s way. Cash followed having a much easier time of traversing the slippery rocks.
We reached a place where the rocks ended abruptly, and smooth, creamy sand filled the space. I jumped down on the wet, spongy surface and breathed a sigh of relief. “That feels much better.” Cash hopped down next to me.
“This way, matey,” I said. “Water and wind together create some of the most beautiful art on the planet and—” I smiled back at him. “And they do it without being pretentious and snobby like some human artists.” The towering walls of stone were capped with patches of bright green grass. The surface of the cliffs started in a collage of cream and orange and then darkened to a gunmetal gray at the bottom where the craggy surface was constantly battered by the sea.
Cash stared up at the cliff’s crest. “I guess millions of years ago, the sea reached all the way up there.”
“That’s what I mean by the artistic magic of water and wind. And they do it without so much as one oily paintbrush or pallet of colors. Just a lot of huffing and puffing and erosion.”
His mouth tilted up. “I must have been truant on the day the science teacher was discussing huffing and puffing.”
“Too bad. It was an interesting lecture.” I raised a brow at him. “And most people wouldn’t have gone straight to the truant excuse.”
“Yeah, well I had a lot more of those than sick days on my record. Is that the cave?”
The stone opening looked as if an arch had been sculpted into the mountainside. “That’s one of them. It might be too dark to find sea glass at this point in the day, but we can try.”
We stepped inside and in the same way that Cash stared in awe at the ocean, he gazed up at the ceiling of the cave. “Amazing.” His deep voice mixed with the roar of the tide outside. “You can almost taste years of salt in the air.” He walked over and his thick fingers ran along the jagged wall. “You’re right. Wind and water— fucking brilliant.” He looked over at me. “Thanks for bringing me here.”
“You’re welcome.” I gazed at him for a long moment. The scar on his side confirmed what I had already figured, the man had lived a treacherous life, and as I’d unwittingly discovered, at some point in his struggle to survive he’d killed someone. Yet there was nothing about him that scared me. Except perhaps the notion that he might eventually break my heart.
One wall of the cave was bordered with a rocky bottom. “Usually the sea glass gets stuck in the nooks. It’s hard to find—” My words caught in my throat as his arm went around my waist. I hesitated at first and then leaned back against his hard chest.
He leaned his mouth down to my ear. His warm breath tickled my cheek. “I can’t spend this much time with you and not touch you, Esme.” Another warm breath brushed my cheek as his hand slid under my sweater and pressed against my stomach. His palm felt cool at first, but it warmed quickly. “I promise I won’t do anything but touch you. But if you want me to stop,” he said reluctantly, “just say so.”
My mind considered it for all of a second. The truth was, I wanted his hands on me. He slid his fingers along my skin to my bra. “I knew you’d feel like this, like expensive silk.” His mouth pressed against my ear, and my head lulled back against him. His face leaned down and he kissed the side of my neck. “Just like I knew you’d taste sweet, like sugar…peanut,” he chuckled at his own remark.
My body tensed for a brief second as his fingers pushed beneath my bra. He paused. “Stop?” he asked.
“No,” I said so quietly it was nearly drowned out by the waves battering the shoreline outside. The shadows inside the cave meant that the sun had dipped lower in the sky. A chill crept into the air and cooled my face, but the heat between our bodies was intense. He slid my bra up and my breasts rubbed against my sweater. I sucked in a breath as his thumb and forefinger took hold of my nipple. It hardened as he squeezed it gently, kneading it and teasing it until I found myself pushing harder toward his touch. “Do you like that, darlin’?”
“Yes,” my faint voice sounded strange to my ears.
He continued to caress my breasts as his other hand slid down over my belly to the top of my jeans. “I think you need to be touched by a man who knows how to leave everyone at the party satisfied. But I need to feel more of you.” He said it in a questioning tone. His deep voice rolled down over my shoulder and his magical fingers teased my taut nipples with just enough pressure to make a surge of heat swirl between my legs. His fingers pulled at the button on my jeans. “Should I stop?” he asked.
I could no longer answer. My head rolled back and forth against his hard chest. “I need you slick and hot, sweetheart.” His tongue traced a circle around my ear, and his mouth ran along my neck. “I want to slide my fingers along your clit, baby.” His voice deepened even more. “I want to fuck you with my fingers.” His words made me lightheaded, and my body trembled at the thought of his hand between my legs. We were standing in a cave inside the crevice of a cliff with the churning sea lapping at the outside walls, and yet, I could have been standing anywhere. The surroundings had disappeared, and he was all I could see or hear or feel. “I want to make you come, darlin’. Spread you legs and let me touch you.”
Even the simple command was hard for me to follow, but my bare feet, nearly numb from the cold, moved apart. He slid down the zipper of my jeans. It sounded absurdly loud in the cavern. His hands inched down toward my pussy. I clutched at his arm for support.
He released my nipples and his strong arm wrapped around my waist. “I’ve got you. All you need to do is relax.” He kissed my neck again. “Relax and let me touch you.” His slightly calloused finger slid between the moist folds to my clit. A tiny cry escaped me and floated up to the twenty foot ceiling of the cave. His erotic suggestions had made me wet with desire. His fingers slid through the moisture. He’d barely touched me yet, but now I wanted him to touch me so badly, I would die of disappointment if he pulled his hand away.
“Like velvet,” he muttered against the skin of my neck as his fingers slipped through the cream. Then his arm tightened around me, and two of his fingers pushed inside of my pussy. At first the intimacy was too much, and, as badly as I wanted it, I tensed. I was such an amateur and he was so obviously not. “Baby,” his breath tickled my ear. “Do you trust me?”
I nodded.
“Then stop fighting it and enjoy.”
My eyes closed and slowly the tension flowed from my muscles. In seconds, I felt like a rag doll in his arms. His fingers moved deftly inside of me, and all the while his wrist rubbed against my clit. Instinctively, my hips began to move in rhythm with his hand. “That’s it, darlin’. Go with it. Squeeze yourself around my hand.”
My thighs clenched tighter and I rocked against his hand. My fingers dug into his forearm, and I held him tightly, silently begging him not to stop. I clamped my thighs shut around his hand, and his fingers moved inside of me, every intimate stroke bringing me closer to the edge. Seconds later, I cried out and my entire body pulsed with waves of pleasure. The rough walls of the cave spun around like a carousel, and I leaned against him to regain my balance.
“I guess we knocked that one off your list,” he said cockily. And he deserved to be cocky.
I rolled around and faced him. He peered down at me through long, dark lashes, and I couldn’t stop myself from hopping up on my toes and kissing
him lightly on the mouth. “No wonder you ooze self-confidence. Is there anything you’re not good at?” His face dropped slightly. “Besides taking compliments.” I reached down and zipped up my fly. “Seems only one half of this party is leaving feeling content.”
His cheek creased with his easy smile. “I’m content for now just touching you. And watching your beautiful face through it all made the whole damn thing really worthwhile.”
Now I looked away.
“Uh huh, see who else can’t take a compliment.”
I took hold of his arm. “We should probably get out of here before the water starts seeping in.”
We walked out and both immediately shielded our eyes against the light. The tide had inched up over the rocks, and we had to slog through the foamy current to get back to the beach. I took hold of his arm again. It felt hard, strong and protective beneath my fingers. “Cash?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m glad you came here. I’ve been lonely for so long, I hadn’t even realized it until I met you.”
“Me too, sugar peanut, me too.”
Chapter 9
Cash
“Cash, can you help me!” Bentley’s voice sounded urgent and distant. I put down the drill and ran into the house. Only the bottom half of Ben was visible. His top half was in the attic.
I took hold of the ladder. “What are you doing? This ladder isn’t even steady.”
“I’ve found the lights, but I don’t think I can get enough grip on them.” His voice echoed into the rafters.
“Ben, come down. I’ll get the lights.” I braced the ladder and the man, as he made his slow descent back down the ladder. He took a deep breath when he reached the ground, and I released the one I’d been holding.
He lifted a gnarled finger at me. “Don’t get old.”
“O.K. but you do realize what the alternative is, right?”
“Yes. Forget I said that.” He looked back up the ladder and swayed a bit as if he suddenly realized how high up he’d been. “The box is marked lights. It’s right in front.”
I climbed the ladder and pulled the box toward the opening. I slid it onto my shoulder and climbed down with one hand.
Bentley headed toward the front door. “You’ll have to straighten out the strands on the front yard. There’s no room in here. I talked to Esme this morning when she was out walking the dogs. She’s done with her candy store shift in a few minutes.”
“You can slow down on the matchmaking tricks. I think we’ve got this now.”
He looked slightly hurt.
“Really, Ben, thanks for talking me into asking her to watch the sunset. I might not have had the nerve otherwise.”
His smile returned. “She is something else, isn’t she?”
I nodded. “That she is.” It had been three days since I’d seen Esme. And it surprised the hell out of me how badly I wanted to see her. One kiss and one afternoon of touching her and I’d had a hard time thinking of anything else. Aside from a few semi-steady girlfriends, I’d never allowed myself to become attached emotionally to anyone. It had been part of my survival skills. There were two people I’d grown up with in the Bedlam compound, Jericho and Angel, who I’d protect with my life, but even with them, it had just been easier to remain distant. Once I’d left them both behind in Nevada, I’d realized just how completely alone I was. It was a feeling that left a cold knot in my stomach. But now I’d found someone who I didn’t want to keep at a distance. And while it went completely against my rules for survival, I couldn’t seem to stop myself. Like Ben had said, Esme was something else. A girl like her just didn’t come around more than once in a lifetime. My biggest mind battle now was trying not to remind myself of who I really was. I had no right to be in her life. My ugly past made me completely unworthy of someone like Esme. I was no better, possibly even worse, than her family. Esme needed someone as real and untouched as her. I was definitely not that guy. My time here was limited to Ben’s need for me to stick around. Then I’d be off on the road again, looking for a place to belong. I had absolutely nothing to offer Esme, but I still couldn’t persuade myself to stay away from her. All my life I’d worked hard to make self-control a part of my armor, but that armor turned to vapor whenever she was near.
We’d both been too busy with work to see each other. Esme bounced from one job to the other all day. I’d started patching some of the interior walls in Bentley’s house, figuring once that was done, I could paint the whole house. Most of what was needed to make the place whole again was cosmetic. In between, we’d started taking apart the vintage Harley. In the next town, there was a man who actually ran a motorcycle restoration and custom bike building shop. We’d be taking the fenders there this week. Eventually, there wouldn’t be enough for me to do on the house or the bike and I would have to move on. I’d known this whole thing was temporary, but now Esme had made that reality harder to swallow.
I carried the box out to the front yard. Ben pulled off the yellowed tape that’d held it shut. “It’s been a few years. Not completely sure what shape they’re in. Might need to replace a bulb or two but these light strands last a long time.” His face smoothed some as he stared into the box.
The wad of wire and lights looked like some colorful, spiky animal curled in on itself. “I don’t know what your definition of strand is, Ben, but I don’t see one in that box.”
Ben scratched his gray head. “I guess I must have been in a hurry when I put them away last time.” Something over my shoulder lit up his face. I glanced back. Esme was walking toward us and damn if she didn’t light up the whole fucking street just by being on it. “But since I’ve arranged for you to have a pretty helper,” Ben continued, “I’m sure with a little patience you can untangle them.” He looked at his watch. “I’m meeting a couple of friends at the sandwich shop.”
Esme reached the front yard. She looked into the box and burst out laughing. “Maybe we can just hang the whole thing in a big cluster from the porch,” she suggested, trying to catch her breath. Her laugh was the kind that could clear the clouds out of stormy day.
I reached in and lifted out the sphere of tangled lights. I rotated it like a disco ball. “She might be on to something.”
Ben waved off the idea. “I’ll leave you two to your task. And no pressure but—” He waved his hand at his neighbor’s house. They’d hung twinkling stars in every tree and bright red ribbons hung along the porch railing. “I want to catch everyone’s attention with my display this year.” He turned to leave.
“I think the giant ball of lights might do the trick,” Esme said with more laughter. She turned to me and stared at the glob. “The trick is to find the end.”
“I think the obvious question to go with that trick is does it have an end?” I put the ball of lights down. “I don’t think I can get anything done until I do something I’ve been thinking about for three damn days.” I grabbed her to me and kissed her. Her plump, soft lips parted immediately in a silent invitation to deepen my kiss. Which I did. It was torture having to stop at the kiss. I wanted badly to take her into the house and strip her naked and fold her into my arms, but it wasn’t my house and the room was Hunter’s room. My hardened cock pressed urgently against the fly of my jeans. Reluctantly, I pulled my mouth from hers with a groan of frustration.
Her bottom lip jutted in disappointment. “What’s wrong? Was it the kiss?”
“Yeah, it was the kiss.” My thumb brushed her lips. “And this mouth.” I glanced around. No nosy neighbors were hanging about. I reached up and rubbed my thumb over her breast. Her nipple hardened beneath the sweater. “And this body.”
She peered up at me in confusion.
“It’s you, Esme. I want you. I want all of you. But I live in Ben’s house, and I sleep in his son’s room, a room that is still a shrine to Hunter.”
She seemed to grasp my meaning. “Yeah, I don’t think I could relax too much in that room. And while my dad hardly ever pays attention to anything I do, and e
ven though he lets my brothers do whatever the heck they want in their bedrooms, I’m pretty sure he’d come after you with a carving knife if he found you in my room.” Her blue eyes sparkled with an idea. “I know a place though, and it’s very secluded and very cool. Let’s get these lights untangled. Then you can put them up while I go home and get the jeep. I’ve got a few hours before I have to start my restaurant shift.”
I wrapped my arm around her again. “Are you sure? Don’t do this if you’re not ready.”
She picked at a ball of lint on my sweatshirt. “After that little experience in the cave, I’m more than ready.”
Chapter 10
Esme
The house was deserted but the smell of Seton’s weed lingered in the kitchen. Empty beer cans and an empty tequila bottle littered the table. It seemed that all three of them were drinking their meals now. With three jobs, I had little time to see that there was food in the refrigerator or on the table, and since none of them had ever lifted a hand to help me, I’d given up my position as their personal chef and housekeeper. I was the kid, but it felt as if I’d switched roles with my dad several years ago. But now, I’d lost control of the kids, and frankly, I just didn’t care anymore. I worried terribly about Bodhi, but I couldn’t get him to see reason or to look past the ridiculous halo of light he saw whenever he looked at our dad. He was nuts about Dad, and no matter how low the man sank, Bodhi still looked up to him.
I showered and pulled on my favorite dress. The silky fabric hung to mid thigh with tiny pearl buttons that ran down the front of the tight bodice. I had few fashionable items in my closet, mostly because there was no reason to wear anything too fancy in Tucker’s Village. With money always being tight, a dress was beyond frivolous. But I’d worked extra shifts to buy a dress for a school dance. It was a bit snugger in the chest than it’d been in high school, but it still fit. I pulled on my high top sneakers. Not exactly the sexiest accessory, but they were all I had. I pulled two long strands of my unruly hair up and off my face and tied them together in the back with a ribbon. I put on a touch of lipstick and checked the mirror. The feminine reflection staring back at me looked like a stranger.