Sweat coated Drew’s body as he glared at the nurse in front of him. He’d been through hell, and he needed to see his damn angel. “Where is she?”
“We have no record of a Tina Jamison, sir. She didn’t come in here. You must have the wrong hospital.”
No, he didn’t, and Drew was perilously close to tearing the place apart with his bare hands.
“They took her back to Dallas.”
He stiffened at Gunner’s voice. Drew glanced over his shoulder.
Gunner inclined his head to the right. “Come with me.”
If Gunner was giving him information on Tina, then he’d go anyplace with the guy. His steps hurried, Drew followed Gunner to a quiet corner and, once he was sure no one could overhear him, he squared off against the sharpshooter. “Why wasn’t I told about her transfer?”
“Because you were still on scene, defusing bombs.” Gunner lifted a dark brow. “Your lady is all right. You can rest easy on that. Tina was stable when she boarded the flight.”
Your lady... Gunner had always been observant. Drew nodded and tried to calm his racing heart. “You saw her then?”
“I did. Cooper was with her. Hell...” He ran a weary hand over his face as he muttered, “That guy is a ghost. I didn’t even know he was working the Devast case until I saw him jump in the ambulance with her on scene.”
Cooper had been in the ambulance?
“Seems Mercer gave him orders. Protect Dr. Jamison at all costs.”
Drew stiffened. “Mercer didn’t think I could do the job?”
Gunner’s gaze was steady. “Mercer knows that when emotions get involved, even good agents can get compromised.”
“I wouldn’t have traded her safety for anything. I was going back in after her—”
“You dying for her wouldn’t have saved her life. And we both know that was exactly what you planned to do.” Flat, cold words.
True words. He would have traded his life for Tina in an instant. Drew didn’t look away from Gunner’s direct stare.
“Does she know?” Gunner asked quietly.
He had to get on a flight to Dallas. “Know what?”
Gunner laughed. The sound caught Drew off guard. As far as he knew, the guy never laughed.
But then, as far as the rest of the agents seemed to be concerned, Drew didn’t feel, either.
Ice in my veins.
No, he had fire in his veins right then.
“Why don’t you take some friendly advice from someone who’s been where you are...?” Gunner’s lips twisted in a wry smile. “Don’t just stand back and let the thing you want the most slip away from you.”
The fire burned ever hotter inside him. “But what if I’m not right for her? She needs someone—”
“Let her decide what she needs. Who she needs. Go for what you want.” Then Gunner turned away from him. “I’m going home. My wife is waiting for me.”
His wife. His very pregnant wife. Gunner had a wife who loved him—and twins on the way.
“How did you—?” Drew stopped.
Gunner glanced back at him.
“Weren’t you afraid? That what we do... Weren’t you scared that it would spill over on them?”
But, no, Gunner’s wife, Sydney, she was part of the EOD. She’d worked for years in the field. She knew all about danger. “Never mind,” Drew said, shaking his head. “I shouldn’t have—”
“I was more afraid,” Gunner admitted, voice low, “of trying to live my life without her.”
Drew thought of his life. The missions. One after the other. Coming home.
Being alone.
He’d looked forward to his visits to the EOD office—because I knew I would see Tina.
Is that what he wanted to happen? Would he return to only seeing Tina every few months? He’d keep his emotions sealed off and try to go on with his life without her?
He’d watch life from the outside? Day in and day out, he’d long for what he couldn’t have.
I told her there would be no going back. Because he didn’t want to go back to a life that didn’t involve Tina. He needed her far too much.
He walked down the corridor. His sisters were in a private room. Police guards made sure they weren’t disturbed.
Paige had gotten stitches. Kim and Heather had been bruised, but otherwise unharmed. They’d been very, very lucky.
He stepped into the room with them. Shut the door behind him.
No one spoke at first. Drew realized that he didn’t know what to say.
He hadn’t been in a room with the three of them since—
“I miss you,” Paige told him. A bandage was on her neck. On her arm. White bandages against her skin.
“We all miss you,” Kim added in a soft tone.
Drew swallowed. No ice.
“Why don’t you ever come home?” Heather asked him.
He didn’t have a home. Not anymore.
Paige walked toward him. The baby. The kid sister. Did she know that he’d kept every letter she’d ever sent him?
“My life...” He stopped, cleared his throat and tried again. “I never wanted it to hurt you.”
But it had. Their worlds had collided. “It was my fault that you were hurt. A very...dangerous man tracked the money I’d been sending to you.”
Paige stood in front of him. “Is he going to come after us again?”
Drew shook his head.
Her pale lips curved. “We don’t want your money, Drew. We just want you.”
And he wanted them. He wanted his family back.
He wanted a life.
Not ice.
Maybe it was time to take the risk—and to take what he wanted most.
* * *
TINA WALKED SLOWLY down the hallway of the FBI’s office in Dallas. Cooper Marshall was at her side. The guy seemed to be her constant shadow.
She was his mission—at least, for about five more feet, she was.
Tina stopped in front of Mercer’s temporary headquarters. He’d commandeered the biggest office in the place. Figured. That was Mercer. Always making friends left and right.
“Thanks, Agent Marshall,” Tina said. “I’m here, safe and sound.”
Cooper inclined his head toward her. He didn’t talk much. The agent sure seemed to be the quiet and intense type.
Once, Tina would have described Drew the exact same way. Except—
He seemed to talk plenty when they were together.
We aren’t together any longer. The mission is over. So are we.
The door opened. Mercer stood there. “Dr. Jamison, come in...”
She stepped across the threshold.
Cooper started to follow.
“Sorry, son,” Mercer said, sounding not the least bit actually sorry as he held up his hand to block Cooper, “but you don’t have clearance for this.”
Then he shut the door in Cooper’s surprised face.
Tina took a few tentative steps inside the office. She glanced around the room and she instantly realized just why Cooper didn’t have clearance.
Two other people were waiting in that office.
She knew the EOD Agent, Cale Lane. She’d patched him up a few times. And the other woman—the woman with the blond hair and the perfect face—that was Cassidy Sherridan.
Well...technically she was Cassidy Sherridan Lane now.
The blonde was Mercer’s real daughter.
She was also rushing across the room and hugging Tina. “I’m so sorry,” Cassidy told her, squeezing her tightly. “As soon as I found out, I came right away. I told Anton who I was.”
“And I damn well told you to keep her away,” Mercer growled to Cale.
“I’m not lying to my wife.” Cale was resolute. Determined. Protective.
Cassidy pulled back a bit to study Tina. “I can’t ever make this up to you.”
Tina frowned at her and shook her head. “There’s nothing to make up. You didn’t do anything to me. It was all Anton.” She glanced toward Mercer
. His arms were crossed over his chest, but his gaze was on her—and it was worried. “Is his network contained? Is it over?”
“Yes.”
Her shoulders slumped. “Then we saved lives. The risk was worth it.”
“But you shouldn’t have been risked,” Cassidy whispered as she stepped back. “You should never have been in harm’s way.”
Tina had to smile at that. “And you should have been? We can’t help who we are...or who we’re not.” She felt...different standing in that room with Mercer and Cassidy. Before the nightmare of her abduction, Tina had always been a bit in awe of Mercer and all the EOD agents.
And she’d been...afraid. Of so much. Of letting her weakness hurt others. Of being caught in the cross fire once more.
“I’m not weak,” Tina said.
Mercer’s eyes narrowed.
Cale stood beside Cassidy.
“Who the hell said you were?” Now anger lit Mercer’s eyes. “If Lancaster—”
Tina shook her head. “I’m the one who thought it. Drew never said anything.” She pushed her glasses—another replacement pair because she’d lost the others in the blast down in New Orleans—up a bit on her nose. “I’ve been hiding for a long time, and I don’t want to do that anymore.” She wouldn’t stay in her labs. Wouldn’t live through the actions of others.
It was time for her to seize her own adventures.
Only, maybe these new adventures wouldn’t involve death and destruction.
“You let me hide,” she said to Mercer because she’d seen through his mask.
His jaw hardened. “I wanted you safe.”
Cassidy laughed softly. Sympathy flashed across her face. “Oh, Mercer...when you keep us safe, sometimes you keep us caged.”
Tina didn’t want to be caged anymore. Not by Mercer and not by her own fear.
The past couldn’t haunt her, and she wouldn’t spend her days afraid of what might come.
Mercer stared into Tina’s eyes. “What about Lancaster?”
He always saw so much. “He did his job. It’s over now.”
There had never been any talk of a future from him. Never any talk of emotions.
Tina knew what she felt, but as for Drew...
Maybe I couldn’t ever get past the ice.
It sure had felt as if she had, though. His torch had seemed to scorch right to her very soul.
Frantic pounding sounded on the door.
Mercer jerked his head. Cale immediately reached for Cassidy, and they slipped out a side door.
No wonder Mercer picked this office.
When they were clear, Mercer yanked open the main door. “I’m in a private meeting, what do you want?”
Cooper stood to the side. Two FBI agents—decked out in pressed suits—stared at Mercer with wide eyes. “The prisoner is seizing, sir. We’ve called medical personnel but—”
“It could be a trick,” Mercer snarled as he rushed past them.
Tina was right on his heels. There was only one “prisoner” who would have sparked this kind of reaction from Mercer.
They zigged and zagged through the halls. Then they were entering a small room that she hadn’t seen before. No windows. Only one narrow door to gain entry into that place.
Anton Devast lay slumped on a narrow cot in the room. Two agents were with him, trying to turn his head so that he could breathe.
Anton’s eyes widened when he caught sight of her. “Dead...”
No, she wasn’t.
Tina fell to her knees next to him. His breath was jerking out, his heart—beating too slowly.
She stared at his skin, noting the blue tinges and the sunken lines around his eyes and mouth.
He tried to lift his hand to reach for her.
But he didn’t have the strength.
His eyes flared. His lips trembled as he tried to speak.
Only, he couldn’t talk anymore. It was too late.
Anton Devast was still staring at Tina when he died.
* * *
IT WAS BACK to business as usual at the EOD.
Tina stepped into her lab, the white lab coat she wore a familiar comfort to her. After Devast’s death, she’d been caught up in a whirlwind. A whirlwind controlled by Mercer. Before she’d barely blinked, she’d found herself back in D.C.
With, of course, Agent Cooper Marshall at her side.
She hadn’t seen Drew again. Hadn’t heard from him.
His sisters were safe, alive— She carried the image of them embracing him in her mind.
But Drew...he just seemed to be gone.
Had he already taken another mission? Gone out on another undercover assignment? Was he in the U.S.? Already halfway around the world?
She didn’t know.
But Tina would find out.
Her hair was twisted into a small bun and her steps were sure as she searched around her lab. Less than a week. How could one life change so quickly?
Hers had, irrevocably, and there was no going back now.
She realized the full meaning of Drew’s warning to her. When he’d said there would be no going back, she should have paid more attention. Her old life had vanished, destroyed in the heat of their passion.
Her new life seemed too cold. Too sterile and stark, without him.
I miss him.
The door squeaked open behind her.
“Be with you in a second,” she said, throwing the words over her shoulder as she bent to peer into the low cabinet.
“Take your time,” a slow, drawling voice told her, the smallest hint of Mississippi deepening those words. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Drew.
She straightened slowly, then turned toward him. He stood just inside the doorway, his shoulder propped against the door frame. His eyes were on her.
And he was staring at her as if he could eat her alive.
Only fair, she was probably ogling him the same way.
“I missed you in New Orleans.” He stepped away from the door. Locked it. “And in Dallas.” He stalked toward her.
“Mercer wanted me to come back—”
“I’m not real interested in what Mercer wants.”
Neither was she. Her gaze slid over him. Tall. Dark. Deadly. That was Drew. But his eyes—they were bright.
They seemed to shine with emotion.
But Tina didn’t know if she could trust what she was seeing in his gaze.
“Don’t.” He stopped in front of her.
“Don’t what?” Why was her voice so husky?
“That’s not the way you usually look at me.”
She swallowed, not sure what he was talking about.
“Usually, you stare at me with trust. I look into your eyes, and I want to be the man you think I am.”
He was.
She made herself ask, “How am I looking at you now?”
“Like you’ve lost faith in me.” The faint lines near his mouth deepened. “Doc, don’t. I’ve been tracking you. I’ve been steps behind you all the way home.”
“I—I thought you might be on another mission.”
He nodded. “I am. The most important mission of my life.”
Oh, right. Now she understood. Another mission meant he had to be medically cleared for the field. She cleared her throat. “In light of what’s...happened...another doctor here can—”
“I don’t want another doctor.” His hands wrapped around her waist and he lifted her up. He sat her on the exam table. Put them eye-to-eye and leaned in real close to her. “You’re the one I want. The only one I want.”
“Drew—”
He kissed her.
Kissed her with passion, with need, with raw lust.
Kissed her as if he were desperate.
Kissed her as if she were his life.
She kissed him back just as fiercely. Her arms curled around his neck and she pulled him tightly to her.
She didn’t care where they were. She had him in her arms again, and she’d take this moment
while she could.
It was her new philosophy. Grab life. Hold on tight.
She was sure holding tight to him.
When he licked her bottom lip, a delicious shudder slid over her.
“I love you.”
It took a minute for his growled words to sink in. When they did, Tina shook her head.
He pulled back, just a few inches, and his golden stare held hers. “I. Love. You.”
“You don’t have to say—”
“The truth? Yeah, Doc, I do.” He brushed back a lock of hair that had escaped from her bun. “I wanted to tell you in New Orleans. I wanted to tell you in Dallas. Hell, I even wanted to tell you in Lightning.”
What? No, he could not have just said that.
“I haven’t loved another woman, haven’t gotten close to anyone, the way I have with you.” His fingers curled under her jaw. “You slipped right past my walls. Made me want things...things I never thought I could have.”
If this was a dream, she had better not ever wake up. “You can have anything.”
He smiled at her. “You’re what I want.”
Her tall, dark and deadly agent was staring straight at her—and looking at Tina as if she was his world.
“I know you don’t love me,” he said, and he spoke those words with a determined pride that made her heart ache, “but give me a chance. That’s all I’m asking for. A chance to show you that we can be good together. No bombs. No danger. No threats. Just you and me. Give me the time to—”
“No.” That one word sent silence through the room.
His hand slid away from her. He swallowed. The soft sound was almost painful to hear. “Then I won’t push you anymore. I’m sorry. I—I guess I should have let you go.”
Never.
She grabbed his arm when he tried to ease away. The new stitches that she had on her neck—courtesy of that jerk Carl—pulled a bit. Tina ignored the little flash of pain. Some things were more important than pain. “I don’t need to take any kind of chance on you. I know that I love you.”
He blinked at her.
Ah, so she’d finally caught her agent by surprise. Only fair. He’d sure broken into her world and turned everything upside down.
“I loved you in New Orleans,” she told him softly. His pupils widened. The darkness fought the gold of his eyes. “I loved you in Dallas.” She smiled at him and hoped that he could see the emotion in her eyes. “And I loved you in Lightning.” She’d tried to tell him, to show him, in a million small ways.