‘I’m fine with that,’ said Kirkus. ‘Mum’s the word.’
I turned to the right and started walking. Kirkus stayed by my side.
After a couple of minutes, he said, ‘Does the fair Eileen realize you’ve deserted her?’
‘She’s asleep.’
‘And so you availed yourself of the opportunity to sneak away.’
‘Give it a rest, huh?’
‘Did you sneak out in hopes of finding me?’
‘In your dreams, Kirkus.’
He laughed softly. ‘One can hope.’
‘Don’t you need to be getting home?’
‘Not at all.’
What does it take to get rid of him!
‘Nothing would tickle me more,’ he said, ‘than to while away the night with you, Eduardo.’
‘I’d really prefer to be alone.’
‘You’re just saying that. Nobody likes to be alone.’
‘Speak for yourself.’
‘Where are we going?’ he asked.
‘I’m going this way,’ I told him.
‘I’m going this way, too.’
So far, we were both walking northward along Fairmont Street Even though I’d come out much earlier than usual, it made sense to start heading in the right direction.
‘Such a splendid night,’ Kirkus soon said. ‘The chill October breeze, the blowing leaves, the dancing shadows. I feel as if I’m in the midst of a Ray Bradbury story.’
‘I feel like I’m in a Gore Vidal.’
Kirkus let out a whoop of laughter and patted me on the butt. ‘Naughty boy!’
Chapter Fifty-two
When the Fairmont Street bridge came into sight, Kirkus asked, ‘Where are we going, old boy?’
‘Onward,’ I said.
‘Beyond the bridge?’
‘Far beyond the bridge.’
‘You must have a destination in mind.’
‘Dandi Donuts.’
‘You jest.’
‘Nope.’ If he stays with me, I thought, that’s exactly where I’ll go. Maybe have a couple of donuts and a cup of coffee, pass some time with Kirkus, then lose him and go looking for Casey.
‘That’s miles away.’
‘“I have miles to go before I sleep.”’
‘Oh, dear.’
‘You can come along if you want, but it’s up to you. With or without you, I’m going to Dandi Donuts.’
‘You must be mad.’
“‘TRUE! - nervous - very, very dreadfully nervous I had been and am; but why will you say that I am mad?”’
‘Delightful! A quote for every occasion.’
‘Just trying to impress you, old bean.’
‘If you hope to impress me, quote Camus.’
‘In that case, you’ll have to remain unimpressed.’
We began to make our way over the bridge. Of the four old-fashioned lamps by its sides, three of the globes were dark and one glowed with murky light. The same as last night.
We were about halfway across when Kirkus said, ‘Don’t you just adore the Old Mill Stream?’
‘It’s pretty nice.’
Saying, ‘So picturesque and romantic,’ he turned aside and stepped over to the parapet.
Though I halted, I didn’t join him.
He glanced back at me. ‘Are you in such great haste for donuts that you have no time to linger and enjoy the beauties of the night?’
‘Pretty much.’
‘I should think a setting such as this would have a special appeal for you. It’s so ... Poe-ish.’
‘The stream?’
‘The old, gloomy bridge. Don’t you think so?’
‘I suppose.’
He beckoned to me. ‘Please.’
I just stood there and looked at him.
He shook his head. ‘I promise not to molest you.’
‘Comforting. Are you coming?’
‘You come here.’
‘I don’t think so.’
‘My God, man. All I want to do is linger here for a few brief minutes and enjoy the view.’
‘I’m not stopping you.’ I started walking away. Glancing back, I said, ‘See you later.’
‘I wouldn’t go off and leave you, old man.’ Though he sounded nearly as smug as usual, I heard a note of pain in his voice.
‘Okay,’ I said. ‘I’ll wait for you.’
‘Thank you.’ He turned away. Bending over, he put his elbows on the parapet. His head moved slightly from side to side, up and down. Then he looked back at me. ‘It’s a splendid view,’ he said.
‘I’ve seen it.’
‘Come here and see it with me.’
‘Thanks anyway.’
He muttered, ‘It’s thrilling to be loathed,’ and turned away.
Oh, great.
His back to me, his elbows on the parapet, he lowered his head. I watched him for a while. Then I asked, ‘You okay?’
He neither answered nor moved.
‘Rudy?’
Still no response, so I went over to him. Close by his side, I bent over and put my elbows on the parapet. The area below us was so dark that I could hardly see the stream. ‘Nice view,’ I said. ‘I can’t see a thing.’
He didn’t look at me, just leaned there with his head drooping and stared down.
‘Hey,’ I said. ‘Cheer up, okay?’
He kept staring down for a while. Then he said, ‘Perhaps I should jump.’
‘Up and down for joy?’
‘You’re so amusing.’
‘You mean “jump” as in off the bridge here?’
‘It seems like a fine idea.’
‘A smashing idea,’ I said.
‘Asshole,’ said Kirkus.
‘I wouldn’t do it if I were you.’
‘If you were me, you might.’
‘Well, shit yes. Put it that way.’
He laughed, but it sounded dreary. ‘Edward, Edward.’
‘Is there something going on that I don’t know about?’
‘I don’t believe so.’
‘No hideous, fatal disease?’
‘My health is splendid.’
‘Won’t be if you jump off this bridge.’
‘Ever the wiseass.’
‘I’m not kidding, man. It might look like a long way down, but it isn’t. You might break a couple of bones, but it isn’t likely to kill you.’
‘Perhaps we should find out.’ With that, he flung a leg up and over the parapet.
Instead of trying to grab him, I said, ‘I wouldn’t.’
He swung his other leg up and over, then sat there, his feet hanging toward the stream, his hands flat against the concrete on both sides of his rear end.
‘If you fall,’ I said, ‘it’s gonna really fuck you up.’
‘I’m already rucked up.’
‘Be that as it may ...’
‘Besides, I have no intention of falling.’
‘Best laid plans ...’
‘The plan is to jump, not to fall.’
‘You don’t want to do that.’
‘We shall see.’ With more agility than I expected from Kirkus, he rose from his sitting position and stood up. The top of the parapet was plenty wide enough to stand on, but I wouldn’t have wanted to do it myself. It made my stomach feel funny to see Kirkus up there. He stood fairly straight, but with his knees bent slightly and his arms out for balance.
‘Okay,’ I said. ‘Great. Now come on down.’
‘You don’t believe I’ll jump?’
‘I believe it. Come on down, okay?’
‘Why?’
‘You’re scaring me.’
‘You care if I jump?’
‘Of course I care. Come on, Rudy. I don’t want you to get hurt.’
‘You do nothing but hurt me.’
‘It isn’t ... I don’t mean to. It’s just... you can be real annoying sometimes and it’s fun to give you a hard time. It’s nothing to jump off a bridge about. Especially a low bridge.’
‘You bastard.’
‘I’m sorry. Okay? Just come on down. I tell you, you don’t want to jump. I don’t want you to jump. We’re friends, aren’t we?’
‘Would that we were.’
From somewhere beyond Kirkus - and below him - came a couple of fast claps. A husky voice called, ‘Come on ’n’ jump, Tinkerbell. We gotcha.’ Another two claps.
Kirkus looked down and squealed, ‘Oh, dear God!’ and lost his balance. He swung his arms, trying to steady himself.
The audience below him - five or six spectators, by the sounds of them - whistled, cheered and clapped.
I grabbed Kirkus around both thighs and jerked hard. With another squeal, he fell.
Chapter Fifty-three
Onto me.
His weight rushed me backward until I fell off the curb and into the street and he smashed down on top of me. My back slammed the pavement. Then my head hit. Clonk! The impact seemed to shake my brain. I saw a brief, dazzling display of fireworks.
Kirkus rolled off. On hands and knees, he looked down at my face and gasped, ‘Are you okay?’
I groaned.
‘Oh, dear God.’
‘I’ll live,’ I mumbled.
‘What’ve I done to you?’
‘Never mind. Just ... help me up.’
‘No, no, you shouldn’t move. I’ll go call an ambulance.’
‘Don’t. I’m okay.’
‘You might have a concussion or ...’
I reached up and grabbed his arm. Hard. ‘Just help me up. I’ll be okay. I’m sure as hell not gonna ... wait here while you ... run off to call an ambulance. Not gonna let them get me.’
‘They did seem rather ... unsavory.’
‘We’ve gotta get outa here.’
He raised his head and looked around. ‘Perhaps you’re right.’
Letting go of his arm, I shoved at the pavement and braced myself up on my elbows. Though my head ached and felt too heavy for my neck, it didn’t seem to be bleeding. Nothing, at any rate, was running down my scalp or the back of my neck.
I turned my head slowly. A car was coming, but it seemed to be a couple of blocks away. No sign of the group from under the bridge.
Kirkus crouched behind me, grabbed my sides just below my armpits, and helped me sit up. Then he held on while I struggled the rest of the way to my feet.
‘Thanks,’ I said.
He still held on.
‘You can let go.’
‘You won’t fall?’
‘We need to get out of the street.’
He moved to my side and clutched my upper left arm. I staggered to the curb and stepped onto the sidewalk. With my free hand, I reached up and fingered the back of my head. I had a big lump there. Touching it, I winced.
The car was almost to the bridge.
I muttered, ‘Ride or Hide?’
‘Pardon?’
‘Nothing.’ Immediately, I wished I hadn’t mentioned the game. It was Casey’s and mine, and I felt cheap for speaking of it in front of Kirkus.
The car came closer. Its headlights made me squint. I looked away. Soon, the car passed us. It kept on going.
Still clinging to my arm, Kirkus turned me southward and guided me along. We’d taken several steps before I realized what was going on. ‘Hey,’ I said. ‘Whoa.’
He didn’t stop, kept pulling me.
‘Wrong way,’ I said.
‘I’m taking you home.’
‘No. Huh-uh. I’m not going back.’
‘I’m afraid you are, old boy. You’re in no condition to be hiking anywhere, much less to some donut shop on the outer edges of nowhere.’
I jerked my arm from his grip.
‘Edward!’
I dodged around him and headed north. Of course, he hurried after me. Not looking back, I raised my hands and said, ‘Don’t touch me.’
‘Please. This is no time to be foolish.’
He reached for my arm, but I knocked his hand away. ‘Don’t mess with me!’ I walked as fast as I could, though every stride pounded jolts of pain up my neck and into my head.
Kirkus kept after me, staying a couple of paces back. We left the bridge behind, but I didn’t slow my pace. ‘This is madness,’ he said. ‘You can’t simply continue on your merry way; you’re injured.’
‘Thanks to you,’ I reminded him.
‘It was your own fault. You should’ve let me jump.’
‘You weren’t jumping, you were falling. And those guys down there would’ve had a field day with you.’
For a while, we didn’t talk. Kirkus simply remained behind me, silent as I walked northward. A couple of blocks later, he said, ‘I suppose I ought to thank you.’
‘Don’t bother.’
Quickening his pace, he came up alongside me and put a hand on my back. ‘You saved my life, Eddie.’
‘More than likely.’
‘And now you’re hurt, and it’s my fault’
‘Looks that way.’
‘I’m so sorry.’
‘Hey,’ I said, ‘it’s all right. Okay?’
‘I owe you my life.’
‘You don’t owe me anything.’
‘I do. I do. Not only because you saved me, but because you cared enough to save me. Cared about me. Nobody has ever cared about me before.’
‘I don’t care that much.’
Laughing softly, he patted my back. ‘Enough to reach out and drag me back from the brink of destruction.’
‘Forget about it. okay?’
‘I’ll never forget about it.’
‘Just do me one favor, then,’ I said.
‘Anything.’
‘Don’t try something like that again. Next time, I’ll let you fall.’
He patted my back some more. ‘Oh, Eduardo, you’re so tough.’
‘Hands off, okay?’
His hand stopped patting me, but remained on my back. ‘And how’s the head?’
‘Not great.’
‘Shall I kiss it and make it better?’
‘No.’
He chuckled. ‘I thought not.’
‘I really don’t need this, Kirkus.’
‘Don’t need what, old boy?’
‘I’m in no mood to be fending you off.’
‘Then don’t.’
Whirling, I knocked his hand away from my back. ‘Just stop it! Stop touching me! Stop flirting, or whatever the hell it is you’re doing. I don’t appreciate it. Just leave me the fuck alone.’
‘Oh, dear.’
‘Know what?’ I asked.
‘I sense you’re about to enlighten me.’
‘We might actually stand some chance of being friends if you’d stop acting like such a fag all the time.’
‘Oh. my. Aren’t we distraught.’
‘Just leave me alone. Go home.’ I turned and walked away from him.
He came striding after me.
Over my shoulder, I said, ‘Get outa here. I’ve had it with you. Go find someone else to bother.’
‘Very well,’ he said.
‘Good.’
He halted. ‘Perhaps I’ll wake up Eileen and bother her.’
I stopped and turned around to face him. ‘Leave Eileen out of this.’
‘You obviously hope to leave Eileen out of this ... your peculiar little adventure. Exactly why did you sneak out of your apartment tonight? Don’t tell me you’re on a quest for donuts. Even if I’m gullible enough to believe such rot, I doubt that Eileen is. She’ll more than likely suspect the worst.’
‘I should’ve let you fall.’
‘Now, don’t be surly. Eileen needn’t know anything.’ Smiling, he came up the sidewalk. He stopped in front of me and reached out and patted my shoulder. ‘Your secret is safe with me,’ he said. ‘Shall we be off?’
‘Extortion must be a way of life with you.’
‘I prefer to think of it as persuasion.’
Side by side, we resumed our northward walk.
‘Don’t you simply love a
utumn?’ he asked after a while. ‘The crisp, fresh wind, the blowing leaves? The tang of woodsmoke in the air?’
‘It’s adorable,’ I said.
‘Oh, dear. You’re in a snit.’
‘I just wanted to take a walk.’
‘I know, I know. And you’re having your walk.’
‘It’s not the same.’
‘It’s ever so much better,’ he said. ‘You have me along for companionship.’
‘Whether I want you or not.’
‘Of course you want me. You’re simply too plebian to admit it.’
‘Oh, yeah.’
‘Deny it all you please. We both know that you find me desirable. Deep down, you want me. The thought of kissing me makes your little heart go pitty-pat.’
‘The thought of kissing you makes me want to barf.’
‘Shall we experiment?’
My heart didn’t go pitty-pat, it thudded.
‘Don’t even think about it,’ I said.
‘One little kiss. I know you want to.’
‘No.’
He forced me off the sidewalk. Grabbing both my arms, he turned me and pushed my back against a tree.
‘Don’t.’
‘You’ll like it. I know you will.’
‘No.’
‘Yes.’ His face moved in closer to mine. ‘Yes.’ he said again.
I turned my face away.
Lips brushing my cheek, he said, ‘Just one kiss.’
‘No.’
‘You want me to leave, don’t you?’ he whispered. ‘I’ll leave if you kiss me. I’ll leave and I won’t go to Eileen. I’ll go back to my own apartment and you’ll be free to meet with your secret flame and nobody will ever know any of this happened.’
‘I haven’t got a secret flame.’
‘Liar, liar, pants on fire.’
‘And I’m not gonna kiss you.’
‘Afraid you’ll enjoy it?’
‘Puck you.’
‘Certainly, if you’d rather.’ One of his hands turned my face toward him and he planted his mouth on mine. I pinched my lips tight together. Moaning, he tried to push his tongue in. And then I felt his other hand against the front of my jeans, rubbing me.
My fist got him in the solar plexus. He whooshed against my mouth, folded over. Stumbling backward, he crossed the sidewalk and dropped onto his ass on someone’s front yard. He sat there, hunched over, hugging his belly and wheezing.
‘You got your kiss,’ I said. ‘Now go home.’
He didn’t even lift his head.