I could have added that Lance only bites guys with acne problems, but I knew my sister would kill me.
"Well, okay, I better not go." Dan looked disappointed, but then he brightened. "But I'll see you guys at the carnival in a little while, right?"
Jessica shook my head violently. It appeared that she didn't want to go to the carnival after all.
"Well, maybe the carnival isn't such a good idea," I said.
Dan frowned. Behind him, Jessica again shook my head. I didn't understand what she was trying to say.
"Uh, could you excuse us for a moment?" Jessica, in my body, said to Dan. Then she took me by the arm and led me out the door.
"Now what?" I sputtered when we got out to the sidewalk.
"Tell him Sumi and I aren't going," she hissed. "You'll go with him."
"Me go to the carnival alone with Zitface?" I shook my sister's head emphatically. "Dream on, Jessica."
"Did you see him with that pizza?" Jessica, in my body, asked heatedly. "He was all over her!"
"I thought he was just being 'friendly,' " I reminded her.
Jessica narrowed my eyes at me. "Okay, maybe I was wrong. Maybe he really does like her. But you can't blame him. Sumi happens to be incredibly beautiful. Any boy would be attracted to her."
"Why do you keep making excuses for him?" I asked. "Face it, Jess, the guy's pure slime. He'd probably put the moves on an amoeba if it was the only living thing around."
My sister ignored me. "Sumi's leaving with her father tonight. I'm sure that as soon as she's gone he'll forget about her."
"You're right," I said. "He forgets about every girl as soon as they're out of his sight."
Jessica grit my teeth and started tugging on my earlobe again.
"Stop doing that!" I said.
My sister stopped tugging. "Jake, please, I was really looking forward to going to the carnival with him this afternoon. Now I'm stuck in your body, and you're in mine, please tell him you'll go."
"Forget it, Jess. He'll probably put his arm around my shoulder and try to show me how to eat pizza."
Jessica sighed with disappointment and made my shoulders sag. "All right. We'll tell him we've made other plans for Sumi this afternoon. I may not get to be with him, but at least he won't be with her."
Just then the door to Vinny's Pizzeria swung open and Sumi and Dan came out.
"Jessica and Jake," Sumi said. "Would you mind if Dan took me to the carnival for a little while? I know I'm here to visit you, but I've always wanted to go to an American carnival. I promise I won't be long."
I watched Jessica, in my body, scramble for an answer. "On second thought, Sumi," she said. "Why don't you go to the carnival with Dan and Jessica?"
29
Dan said he'd meet us at the entrance to the carnival. Sumi, Jessica, and I went back to our house and had iced tea in the kitchen. Then my sister, in my body, shoved my hands into my pockets and turned to me. "Well, Jessica, I guess you ought to go change."
I gave her a funny look. She knew I couldn't change until tonight when we went back to school. Until then I was stuck in her body.
My sister tugged on my earlobe and added, "Clothes."
"Oh." Now I understood.
"Maybe we all ought to go up to your room," she suggested.
"Sure." I led the way up the stairs and into my room. Sumi glanced around at the sports posters on the walls and the video games with a puzzled expression. "This is your room, Jessica?"
Ooops! "Actually, this is Jake's room," I said. "I just thought you might like to see it."
We went across the hall to Jessica's bedroom. Inside, Sumi looked around in wonder.
"It's so big!" she gasped.
"Not really," replied my sister, in my body.
"Oh, yes, Jake, it is," Sumi said. "Compared to my room at home it is very big. In Tokyo we have so many people and so little space. My room is half this size. And look — " she turned to me and pointed at my sister's telephone — "you have your own phone."
"I have to," I said. "Otherwise, no one else in the family would ever get to make a call."
"Why, Jessica?" Sumi asked.
"Because I get so many phone calls," I said.
"You must be a very popular girl," Sumi said.
"Oh, yes, I am extremely popular," I said. "I am the most popular girl in the tenth grade. In fact, I am probably one of the most popular girls in the world. I am — "
"Uh, Jessica," my sister, in my body, interrupted. "I think you're bragging."
"Oh, no, I'm not bragging," I said, still pretending to be her. "I'm simply stating a true fact."
"I think it's time to change your clothes." Jessica, in my body, went into her closet and started to look for things for me to wear.
"Do you like my hair, Sumi?" I asked, running my sister's fingers through her kinky reddish hair. "It used to be straight and brown, but I had it curled up. I also added the reddish color."
"It's, uh, very nice," Sumi said uncertainly.
"Actually, I think it's as ugly as dried seaweed," I said. "I only did it because I thought Zit-face would like it."
"Zitface?" Sumi frowned. "Who is Zitface?" "Oh, uh, that's what I call Dan," I said. "Zitface means he's got — "
"A very nice face," my sister, in my body, interrupted again. "It's just a saying kids around here use. It probably hasn't gotten to Japan yet."
"Like rots," Sumi observed.
"Uh . . . exactly," my sister said uncertainly.
"So you could say Zitface's looks really rot?" Sumi asked.
"Definitely," I agreed.
My sister, in my body, glowered at me. By then she'd pulled out a bunch of her clothes for me to wear. She dumped them on her bed. "Why don't you try these on, Jessica?"
Sumi made a funny face but said nothing. I started to pull off the baggy sweatshirt, but then stopped. My sister, in my body, was standing with my arms crossed, watching and waiting.
"Would you mind?" I said.
"Would I mind what?"
I put my sister's hand on her hip and struck a pose. "Can't a girl get some privacy around here?"
Jessica rolled my eyes so hard I was afraid they were going to come loose in my head. She stomped out of the room, banging the door closed behind her.
I started to try on the clothes she'd taken out of the closet. I didn't care if Sumi watched. After all, she was a girl and I was a girl, at least until tonight.
"Does your brother always pick your clothes for you?" Sumi asked as I tried on a white turtleneck with a red plaid skirt.
"Uh . . . oh, yes," I replied. "Jake has wonderful taste."
"He is also a very good football player," Sumi said.
"Yes," I said. "As you've probably noticed, Jake is an incredible, multi-gifted and talented person."
"You must really love your brother," Sumi observed.
"Everyone loves Jake," I said. "Girls call here all the time. To tell you the truth, Sumi, you were very lucky he had time to see you today. He had to break several dates."
"But I still don't understand why he lied about his age," Sumi said.
"Oh, well, can I tell you a secret?" I asked. Sumi nodded.
"I think in some ways Jake is very frustrated," I said. "You see, he's so much smarter and more mature than the other boys in his grade. He only lied about his age because he needs to find people on his own level."
"But he does have friends his age," Sumi pointed out. "Those two boys, Josh and Andy."
"He makes an exception for them," I said. By then I'd tried on a bunch of Jessica's outfits. I decided to go back to the white turtleneck and plaid skirt.
Rap! Rap! There was a knock on the door.
"Yes?" I said.
"Are you decent?" my sister filled my voice with sarcasm.
"Yes, Jake, you can come back in now."
My sister, in my body, came back into the room. When she saw the outfit I'd selected, she nodded my head. "Okay, that's a start."
Somethin
g about the way she said that made me nervous. "A start?" I repeated. "What does that mean?"
Jessica, in my body, smiled. "Now we have to do your face."
30
I swallowed. "My face?"
My sister put one of my hands on my hip and bent the other in a very un-guylike way. "Well, of course, silly. You didn't think someone as popular as you could go on a date without makeup, did
you?"
"Uh . . . " I glanced at Sumi and realized that I couldn't say out loud what I was thinking. But this was bad. I may have been in a girl's body, but the idea of wearing makeup was still totally gross.
"Let's see, now . . . " In my body, my sister pressed one of my fingers against my lip. "What shall we do with you?"
I noticed that Sumi was watching my sister in my body carefully. Jessica wasn't helping things by pretending to act like such a . . . a weirdo. She started to guide me across the room.
"Wh . . . where are we going, Jake?" I asked nervously.
"To your makeup table, Jessica, where else?"
I hesitated. "Come to think of it, Jake, I think I'd prefer the natural look today."
"Oh, really?" my sister raised my eyebrows skeptically. "Is that why you had your hair permed and highlighted?"
"Uh . . . " I swallowed. She had me on that one.
"Now come on." She tugged me toward the makeup table. "The natural look is totally lame, Jessica. I'm not going to let you leave this room until you look gorgeous."
With Sumi there I couldn't really argue. Jessica, in my body, led me to the makeup table and made me sit down. I looked into the mirror. What I saw was very strange — me, in my sister's body. Meanwhile, standing behind me was my sister in my body. She had a devilish look on my face. I knew I was in big trouble.
"The important thing is to make you look really great for Dan," she said. "This definitely calls for false eyelashes."
"Wha " I gasped.
"Now, now, Jessica," she said. "Don't be modest. You know how fabulous you look in them."
Half an hour later she was finished. I looked into the mirror and studied my, I mean, my sister's face. It looked like a mask. The skin was powdered. The cheeks were darkened with reddish-brown blush. False eyelashes were glued to the eyelids, which were also blackened with mascara. Eyeliner and eye shadow had also been added. My sister's lips were one shade of red, and their outline, another, darker shade.
As I stared at the face looking back at me I almost felt sorry for girls. I mean, the idea that they go through all this junk in an effort to look good. Covering their faces with sticky, slimy paints. Gluing fake stuff on. Burning their hair with chemicals to make it curly and to change the colors. . . .
Meanwhile, all a guy had to do was take a shower, put on clean clothes, and comb his hair.
My sister, in my body, and Sumi appeared in the mirror behind me.
"So what do you think?" Jessica asked.
"You have done a beautiful job, Jake," Sumi praised her.
I watched as my sister made a smile appear on my face. She dusted my hands together proudly. "Piece of cake."
"Is it common for brothers to make up their sisters here?" Sumi asked.
"Not really," my sister, in my body, replied. "It's just something I've always been naturally good at."
"Oh, I see." Sumi sounded a little uncertain.
"Like I said before, my brother is really unusual," I quickly added. "It's very rare for a boy his age to feel so confident about his masculinity that he doesn't mind helping me with my makeup. He wouldn't have to do it if I weren't such a bonehead about these things. I'm very lucky to have a brother like Jake."
In the mirror my sister, in my body, narrowed my eyes angrily. "A bonehead, huh?"
"Yes." I nodded her head. "I'm just totally helpless when it comes to makeup. I'd be lost without Jake."
My sister, in my body, rubbed my jaw pensively. "Hmmm, that reminds me, I almost forgot the patchouli oil."
31
“NO!" I launched my sister's body out of the chair and away from the makeup table. "There's no way. Forget it! I'm not wearing that stuff!"
Jessica, in my body, pretended to look puzzled. In my hand she held the vial of the smelly oil. "But you always wear it, Jess."
"Uh, not today. I've changed my mind."
"What is it?" Sumi asked.
Jessica, in my body, opened the vial and held it out.
Sumi took a sniff. "That smells very interesting."
"Well, I'm not interested in smelling interesting," I said.
"But it makes you unique," my sister, in my body, said. "The other girls all wear the same old perfumes. This makes you distinctive."
"I think you mean, di-stink-tive," I replied. "With the emphasis on stink."
My sister put my hands on my hips and shook my head in disappointment. "I really don't understand you, Jessica. One moment you're raving about what a brilliant makeup artist I am and how you'd be helpless without me. The next moment you're refusing my best fashion advice."
"In this one case you're wrong," I said.
"But how would a bonehead like you know?" my sister, in my body asked.
"A girl's got a right to her own opinion," I replied and crossed my sister's arms firmly.
Jessica, in my body, turned to Sumi. "Can you believe how ungrateful he, er . . . I mean, she is?"
Not wanting to let my sister get away with that, I also turned to Sumi. "Don't let her, er . . . I mean, him drag you into this, Sumi. This is between me and my sis — I mean, brother."
Sumi's forehead creased. She tapped her wristwatch with her finger. "I think we better go. Dan will be waiting for us at the carnival."
She was right. I turned to my sister in my body. "Ready?"
"Uh . . . " My sister hesitated and then glanced at our guest. "Would you mind waiting outside for a second, Sumi? I want to speak to my, er . . . sister for a moment in private."
"Okay." Sumi left the room. Jessica, in my body, went to the door and closed it. Then she turned to me.
"I want you to stick to Dan like glue," she said. "Don't let him get any time alone with Sumi."
"Well, with you and I both there, that shouldn't be a problem," I said.
"You don't get it, Jake," my sister said. "I'm not going with you."
"What are you talking about? Of course, you're going."
"No way," she said. "I don't want my geeky brother going along on my dates."
"Are you serious?" I gasped.
"Believe it," she said.
"I have to handle Dan alone?" What a horrible thought!
"Yes, and stop biting my nails!"
I wasn't even aware that I was doing it. I pulled my sister's fingers away from her mouth. "You can't do this to me. I can't do it alone. If you don't go, I don't go."
Jessica pointed my finger at me. "If you don't go, he's going to be alone with Sumi the whole time."
Uh-oh. I didn't like that either. I wanted to be with Sumi. And if I couldn't be with her in my body, being with her in my sister's body was the next best thing. But the only way I could do that was by going to the carnival. "Why can't you come?"
"I told you. I don't want my geeky brother coming along on my dates."
"Just this one time?" I asked.
Jessica shook my head. "No, it sets a bad precedent."
"Look, we'll make an exception," I begged. "You come along on this date and I promise that after we get our own bodies back I'll never want to come along on a date with you."
"What about to a concert?" she asked.
"I promise I won't ask to go," I said.
"A movie?"
"If I really want to see it, I'll go with my friends," I said.
"Suppose a boy I know gets tickets to a football game?" my sister asked.
"Uh . . . " I hesitated. "You mean, a pro game?" Jessica nodded my head.
"That's sports," I said.
"So? I would still be on a date," she said.
"But you're talking
about a pro football game," I said. "In a real stadium with hot dogs and soda and TV coverage. How could you go and not take me? That would be totally unfair. Date or no date, it's against the rules. Come on, Jessica, blood is thicker than water. You couldn't leave me behind."
Jessica let out a big sigh. "You're really pathetic, Jake."
32
Jessica, in my body, finally agreed to go to the carnival. But not with Dan, Sumi, and me. Since she was in my body, she would go with my friends, Josh and Andy.
Even Sumi argued that she should go with us, but Jessica, in my body, insisted that it was better if she went with my friends. Since Josh lived on the way to the carnival, Jessica, Sumi, and I walked there together.
Andy and Josh were waiting for us outside Josh's house. They both grinned when they saw me, in my sister's body, all dressed up.
"Oh, Jessica, I just adore your makeup," Andy gushed.
"And that's the cutest little outfit!" added Josh. "I'm sure Dan's going to love you in it!" Andy said.
"Very funny," I grumbled. If I hadn't been in my sister's body I would have slugged them both.
We headed for the carnival. From a block away we could see the Ferris wheel and hear the joyful shouts and squeals of kids on the rides. As we got closer, the sounds of the crowd grew louder, mixed with the clanging of bells and the hiss of helium balloons. Now we could see the booths where you could knock down lead bottles or sink baskets for prizes.
Dan was waiting for us at the entrance to the carnival. When he saw Sumi and me, he smiled broadly and walked toward us. I stopped and cringed at the thought of him hugging me.
But he walked right past me in my sister's body.
And stopped in front of Sumi.
"Glad you could make it," he said. "Ready?" "Yes." Sumi nodded eagerly.
The next thing I knew, Dan took her hand and led her in.
An elbow poked me in the ribs. It was from my sister in my body. "Don't just stand there," she whispered. "Go with them!"
I hurried to catch up with Dan and Sumi.
"Don't they have carnivals in Japan?" Dan was asking her.
"Not like this," Sumi replied, looking around wide-eyed at the game booths filled with stuffed animals and other prizes, and at the vendors selling T-shirts and balloons you could put your own photograph on.