“I don’t do that.”
“Sure you do,” she said. “When something happens that you’re not expecting, your eyes get really big and round. Like someone jumped out and said ‘surprise!’”
“Great, Caitlin, thanks a lot. Now I’m going to worry that I have bug eyes.”
She laughed. “Don’t be silly. It’s cute, really. Even Sean thinks so.”
“You and Sean talk about my bug eyes?” I was amazed they’d talked about anything at all, but especially me.
“No, of course not. And they’re not bug eyes. They just get big and round.”
Sounded like bug eyes to me. I swung around and looked in the mirror. My eyes were brown. A deep brown. Like chocolate. When I’d gotten my restricted driver’s license I’d asked the clerk to say my eyes were chocolate brown — but all she put was brown. So boring.
Big, round, brown, and boring.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“Worrying about my big eyes.”
“Well, don’t. Everyone looks surprised when they’re surprised. I just told you so you wouldn’t look or be surprised. I want Tanner to think it’s no big deal — having a guy meet up with me. And I’m nervous about tonight, okay?”
I turned back around. Caitlin wasn’t usually a babbler. Her brow was furrowed. Maybe my eyes widened when I was surprised, but hers narrowed when she was worried.
“I really like him. I want him to think we’re cool,” she said. “If he even shows up.”
A loud bang rattled the door. We both screeched. I figured my eyes got big, too.
“I’m leaving,” Sean called out.
“Wait! We’re not ready,” Caitlin yelled.
“Too bad.”
“He has no patience,” Caitlin growled, grabbing her tote bag.
I snatched up my mine. I’d brought a quilt that my grandma had made. “Well, we were taking a long time.”
“I wanted to be perfect.”
“You are.”
She opened the door. “You are, too. We both are.”
It was odd to see Caitlin nervous.
When we got to the ballpark, Tanner was already there, waiting at the entrance. Caitlin immediately skipped to his side, leaving Sean and me to catch up.
It was strange. Until that moment I hadn’t realized that it might look like Sean and I were together.
I’d done lots of things with Caitlin’s family. Sean was usually there. Caitlin was always there. Sometimes it was the three of us. Mostly it was two of us: Caitlin and me. It had never been just Sean and me.
Sean and Tanner did a guy kind of greeting. I figured they knew each other. Made sense. All of us working at the park together. On the other hand, there were so many employees that it was hard to get to know everyone.
“This is Robyn,” Caitlin said, indicating me. “My best friend.”
“I’ve seen y’all at the park together,” Tanner said. “And that other girl — what’s her name?”
“Whitney,” Sean said before either Caitlin or I could respond.
“Oh, yeah.”
It sounded like he knew her but she hadn’t made much of an impression on him. Hard to believe.
“We better find a place,” Caitlin said, “before all the good spots are taken.”
“I told Whitney we’d meet her here,” Sean said.
“Whitney’s coming?” I asked, then blinked my eyes several times to keep them from looking big — anything not to look surprised. On the other hand, I was surprised.
“Yeah, she didn’t have anything to do tonight. I figured you wouldn’t mind,” he said.
Okay, now I really was going to be the odd person out.
“We don’t mind,” Caitlin said.
I really struggled not to look surprised at that comment. She didn’t even like Whitney.
“Here,” Caitlin said, tugging the bag holding the quilt from my grasp. “Tanner and I will go find a spot on the knoll behind third base while y’all wait for Whitney.”
I was used to Caitlin deciding what we were going to do, used to her not waiting for me to voice any objections, but waiting with Sean while he waited for Whitney, why would she think I’d want to do that? But with her already leaving with Tanner, I didn’t know how to make a graceful exit.
So I stood there waiting.
“What’s with all the eye blinking?” Sean asked. He was dressed in his usual black: black jeans, black T-shirt.
“What? Oh.” I shook my head. “Something Caitlin said.”
He chuckled. “She said something to make you blink your eyes? That makes no sense.”
“She said that when I’m surprised, my eyes get big and round.”
“Everyone’s do. It’s a reflex.”
“Yeah, but now I’m thinking about it.”
“So think about something else. Besides, guys like big eyes.”
“They do?”
“Oh, yeah. Totally.”
It was strange to realize that he was trying to make me feel better or make me feel more comfortable or something.
“Have you ever noticed the girl who works the ticket booth at the water park?” he asked. “All squinty. I can’t even figure out what color her eyes are. Yours? No question. Brown.”
He noticed my eyes? Well, I guess they were hard to miss. And I had noticed his. A long time ago.
He glanced around, obviously looking for Whitney, wanting to make sure he didn’t miss her. Why was I even still here? All I had to do was say that I was going to go on in. Then I could find Caitlin and feel awkward around her and Tanner, which would probably be worse since I didn’t even know Tanner. Maybe I should just call my mom and ask her to come get me. Tell her I have a headache or something.
“Let me ask you something,” Sean finally said.
“Sure.”
“Is it driving Caitie crazy trying to figure out who the new cute babe at the park is?”
“How did you know —” And then it dawned on me. I felt my eyes widen, and I didn’t care. “You sneak!”
He laughed. “Hey, it’s only fair. If she wasn’t always eavesdropping, I wouldn’t have to do it. She is so nosy.”
I couldn’t believe he’d told me. It was like a true confession or something. “So there is no cutie?” I asked.
He shrugged. “There are lots of cute babes.”
“But not one in particular?”
“Nope. I was talking to one of my buds, knew she was outside my room, so I started making stuff up. I do it all the time when I know she’s listening. Come on, admit it, she deserves it.”
I wasn’t going to admit it. She was my friend. My friend who wasn’t here at the park entrance with me. So what was I doing? Flirting with her brother? No, I was just talking with him.
“Hey, guys!” Whitney called out as she walked quickly toward us. She was wearing a white camisole, jeans, and sandals with a jeweled T-strap that I thought Caitlin would probably kill for. Whitney had a matching tote bag slung over her shoulder.
Then, as though she realized that she was acting too excited about being here, she slowed down and stopped smiling. “Wow. This is such a little park.”
She said it like it was an insult to be a small park, like it was suddenly beneath her to be here.
“Minor league teams play here,” Sean said, “but the fireworks are spectacular.”
He led the way through the gate and turnstile. It was already pretty crowded, with most of the seats in the bleachers filled. We walked along the path that ran around the top of the seating section.
“So where’s your partner in crime?” Whitney asked.
“What?” I asked.
“You know. Caitlin.”
“Oh, she went ahead to save us a place. Tanner is here, too.”
“Really?” Her eyes widened slightly. A surprised look wasn’t as bad as I thought. “That’s the guy who stands at the edge of the water looking bored, right?”
“Yeah.”
“So is it a date?”
/>
“No, not really. We’re just all hanging out together.”
We’d gotten to the knoll behind third base. Sean started walking down the steps.
“We’re sitting on grass?” Whitney asked.
“Yeah, it’s more fun,” I said.
“It’s where the bugs are.”
“It’s not like we’re in the woods. And we brought a quilt.”
Caitlin stood up and started waving. And I suddenly wondered why I was standing here trying to convince Whitney that she wanted to sit with us. Sean invited her. Shouldn’t he be the one calming her fears about bugs?
“Sit where you want,” I said, getting tired of having to be nice, being constantly surprised by things, and feeling like my life was suddenly out of control. What was supposed to have been a fun, relaxing evening watching fireworks was suddenly awkward and included people I didn’t know, people I wasn’t sure that I wanted to know.
I heard the click of heels on the cement steps and knew Whitney was following me. She probably didn’t want to be sitting alone any more than I did. And that made me feel guilty for being impatient.
Sean was standing by the quilt, waiting for us. Correction, waiting for Whitney. When I got there, I sat beside Caitlin. Tanner was on the other side of her. Whitney sat beside me and Sean sat beside her.
So it was really obvious that I was the only one here without a guy.
Were fireworks worth this embarrassment?
If I’d known earlier that Caitlin had invited Tanner and Sean had invited Whitney, I would have invited someone, too. Nick, maybe. Or Jake even. He was cute. Then I wouldn’t be sitting here feeling like a total loser.
“Oh, my gosh, are those Ferragamos?” Caitlin asked after Whitney turned slightly, stretched out her legs, and crossed her feet at the ankles.
“Knockoffs,” Whitney said like she was totally bored.
“I love those shoes. Did you get them at that website you were telling me about?”
“No, someplace else.”
“Where?”
“If I told you, I’d have to kill you.”
Caitlin rolled her eyes. “Come on, Whitney. I love flashy stuff.”
“I really can’t remember.”
Sean leaned over and said something to Tanner, who shook his head and smiled. They were probably ready to barf with all the shoe talk. I knew I was. Caitlin and Whitney bonding over shoes. I just didn’t get it.
Caitlin nudged my arm. “Don’t you love those shoes?”
Okay, I really didn’t. My sandals were plain brown leather — like my eyes. Boring, but so comfortable.
“They don’t look very comfortable,” I admitted.
“What’s comfort got to do with it?” Whitney asked. “It’s all about style.”
Which I also questioned. Jeweled shoes on a grassy knoll in a baseball park to watch fireworks?
“Hey, I thought it was the Splash team,” a voice said from behind me.
I twisted my head around and looked up. It was Nick. He was holding a girl’s hand. She had dark hair and a nice smile.
Sean invited them to join us, so everyone shifted around to make room for them. The girl’s name was Nicole and she was Nick’s girlfriend. Which meant he was now off my list of possibles.
“Nick and Nic?” Whitney asked. “Too funny.”
It was kinda funny, but they seemed okay with it.
“Hey, we don’t get to choose our names or who we like,” Nick said.
“So do you work at the park?” I asked Nicole.
“No. I’ve got three sisters, way younger than me, so I have to babysit them during the summer while my parents are at work.” She leaned against Nick. “I wish I could work there. I hear it’s awesome.”
“It can be,” Whitney said. “Depends on your supervisor.”
This from the girl who thought working at a water park meant working on her tan? Although maybe she was just trying to earn points with her supervisor. She smiled at Sean, he grinned back. No wonder he never got mad at her. They were in like. Disgusting.
And why was I so bothered by it?
“It also depends who else you’re working with,” Caitlin said, smiling at Tanner, who was grinning at her.
Who did I have to smile at? No one. It was totally unfair. Why didn’t they cut the lights and start the fireworks already?
I glanced around. A guy was standing at the top of the knoll, looking right at us. I could feel his gaze. Was it possible that I might not be the only odd one out?
“Is that Jake?” I asked.
Everyone in our little group turned their head to look where I was looking. It was like I’d asked, “Is that Superman?” I almost burst out laughing, but held it back and snorted instead — which was way more embarrassing.
Sean seemed to be the only one who noticed. He grinned at me. Not exactly the way I wanted to get a guy to notice me — - and Sean wasn’t really a guy I was interested in. Still, I couldn’t help but feel that we’d shared some sort of secret moment.
Then he shoved himself up so he was standing. He waved at Jake. Weren’t we all friendly tonight?
“Who’s Jake?” Caitlin asked, watching as he made his way across the grass to us.
“The ice-cream guy,” Whitney said. “So is everyone from Paradise Falls here tonight?”
“A lot of them are,” Caitlin said. “Makes sense, since a lot of the employees go to school here.”
It didn’t take Jake long to reach us. Sean made the introductions, then we played a sort of musical chairs while people shifted around trying to make more room on the quilt. Somehow Sean ended up sitting between me and Whitney. Jake sat on the other side of her. Even though I figured both Sean and Jake were interested in Whitney, it no longer looked like I didn’t have anyone interested in me. Thank goodness.
But the quilt was really crowded. Still, it was nice, too. Sitting so close to a guy. I could smell the spicy soap that Sean used. When I looked at him, I could really see the blue of his eyes.
I cast a quick glance at Jake. His eyes were brown. And so not boring.
I wondered if maybe my eyes looked boring only to me. And maybe brown eyes were boring to Whitney. It was difficult to tell how she felt about Jake sitting beside her. It was pretty obvious that he liked her — why else would he have made sure to sit by her?
He still seemed kinda shy. Not talking to her or anything. Just being with her.
Maybe he was trying to figure out Sean’s interest in her. She had two guys who liked her, and I had none.
The lights suddenly went out. Thank goodness. Maybe I’d stop obsessing about how hard it was to find a guy who was interested in me.
A burst of fireworks filled the black sky. The entire stadium seemed to release a collective gasp. I could see the silhouettes of everyone in our little group. Caitlin and Tanner, Nick and Nic, Jake and Whitney, Sean and —
Me?
There was just enough light to see that he was looking at me. Which made no sense since it was Whitney that he cared so much about us being nice to, Whitney he included in everything, Whitney, Whitney, Whitney …
Was I jealous? I thought I was. Which made no sense because he was Caitlin’s brother, had always been around in my life, had irritated us both, only now I was irritated in a completely different way. Irritated that he wasn’t noticing me.
Only he was looking at me. It was a really strange moment. An odd kind of electricity was in the air. I couldn’t believe it. I was sitting there thinking about what it would be like if Sean Morgan — Caitlin’s irritating brother — kissed me.
Then there was another burst of fireworks and he turned his attention back to watching the sky.
Which was a good thing. A very good thing.
Tuesday I was at Splash, trying not to think about Sean. I’d had this really weird dream. Sean and I were swimming, never coming up to the surface for air, like we were sea creatures or something. Every now and then a dolphin would wander by and we’d grab a fin and go zip
ping through the water. Laughing, laughing underwater. I’m not sure why all these images were bombarding me. It was bad enough to think about him. I didn’t really want to dream about him.
“So what’s up with you and Sean?” Whitney asked.
She was doing her usual thing of making sure the far side of Splash wouldn’t collapse if someone sat on it. I was irritated with her for being so adorable that two guys wanted to sit by her. I was annoyed that she didn’t even pretend to work.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“You kept looking at each other last night. Do you like each other?”
“Nooo.” A toddler slipped. I picked her up, helped her get situated on the slide, and gave her a little push. She laughed going down the slick slide.
“What do you think of Jake?” she asked.
“What do you mean?”
“You know, Robyn, these questions aren’t that hard. They shouldn’t need a translator.”
“It’s just that I’m distracted here trying to keep an eye on the kids. That’s what we’re being paid to do. Remember?”
“How can I forget when you’re constantly reminding me?” She glanced around, gave one of her bored sighs.
I really couldn’t figure her out. It was like she was working really hard to give the impression that everything bored her. Like last night. She’d appeared to be so excited when she arrived at the ballpark — - and then she’d shifted into this-is-really-beneath-me gear. I just didn’t get it. What was her story?
I heard loud, deep laughter. It wasn’t unusual at a water park to hear people having fun, but near Splash, it was unusual to hear deep laughter. Deep, guy laughter.
I turned around. Three guys, grinning broadly and laughing, were swaggering toward us. They had trouble tattooed and pierced all over them. They looked way older than us, seniors in high school maybe.
The guy leading the way had a pierced eyebrow, braided leather around his neck and wrist, and a tattoo of a shark on his chest, right above his heart. I relaxed a little because I recognized the tattoo. The park had a tattoo booth near the food court. The tattoo wasn’t real, just painted on, but it was waterproof — for a while anyway.
These guys had apparently stopped by the booth. For fun maybe. Or maybe they wanted to look tough.