Pouring myself a fulsome glass, I swig it back. Wish I’d had some chips now as I’m a bit hungry. Instead, resourceful as ever, I open the box of chocolates and tuck in. The cherry liqueur is the first to bite the dust. Oh, yeah.
I can also now take time to avail myself of the deep double bath amid the acres of marble in the bathroom. I go for the works. Why not? Someone else is paying for it all. I’m lavish with the bubble bath, and then I pour myself another glass of fizz and sink into the water.
Arranging the bubbles in a pleasing manner, leaving my boobs bare above them, I take a selfie, smiling seductively. Then, before I can think better of it, I send it to Crush with the message, Missing u big boy!
That should cheer up his meeting.
Straight away, a message pings back. Txs, Lucy. Nice to see so much of you. Love Marcus. xxxxxxx
Doh! I am so terminally unsuited to technology. I’m going to throw this phone in the bin as I’m a liability with it. I’m so mortified that I can’t even bring myself to reply. At least I didn’t send a picture of my boobs to my dad. A small crumb of comfort.
Not daring to risk another seductive text, I try ringing Crush’s number instead, but it goes straight to voicemail.
‘Hey,’ I say. ‘My talk’s been cancelled until tomorrow and I’m now getting ready to go to the ball alone. I feel like Cinderella.’ Aiden should be here with me, then we’d be having a lot more fun. As it is, I’ve inadvertently sent Marcus a picture of my tits. Stupid, stupid me. I sigh down the phone. ‘I miss you. Bruges is fabulous. The hotel is amazing. I hope your meeting has gone well.’ I’m reluctant to hang up, but what else can I do? ‘Love you.’
I have some more champagne to cheer me up and sink into the soothing bubbles to contemplate the night ahead.
Some time later, I emerge from the bath, pink-cheeked and sleepy. I might have even dozed off for a little while. I check my phone, but still no text or call from Crush.
In the bedroom, I lift my long black evening dress out of my wheelie case. I was going to borrow something from Chantal but nothing was quite right. This dress Holds Memories. I’ve had this for a long time as Marcus bought it for me, at great expense, for one of the Christmas parties at his firm. It’s so posh that it rarely gets an outing but, despite the memories, it’s actually really nice to be wearing it again. It squishes everything in and holds it in just the right places.
I feel a bit squiffy as I ease myself into the slinky gown. Hmm. I might have put on a few pounds since I last wore it. Quite a few. It takes a bit of huffing and puffing to get the zip done up. Maybe I should have tried it on before I left home. I might have to ration my breathing a bit.
Before I leave the room, I check myself in the mirror. Looking hot, Lucy Lombard. It’s just a shame that I’m a boyfriend-free, friend-free zone. To bolster my confidence, I pick another treat from the box that Marcus sent. That makes me smile. At least I have chocolate. That never lets you down.
Chapter Forty-Four
I stand at the top of the staircase to the grand ballroom, acutely aware that I’m alone. Below me there’s an ocean of people, a cacophony of noise. My instinct is to turn tail now, just run away, back to my hotel room to lick my wounds. What am I going to do here by myself?
I should return to the big comfy bed, get in my jim-jams, make use of their fluffy dressing gown and branded slippers. I could ring Crush, find out how his day has gone as I’ve heard nothing from him yet. Perhaps we could even have phone sex, as that’s the only action I’m likely to be getting tonight.
The Master of Ceremonies announces my name. ‘Ms Lucy Lombard, Chocolate Heaven.’
No one even looks up. That’s how important I am.
Then, in the sea of anonymous faces, I see one person staring intently at me. He’s over by the bar where they’re serving champagne and he’s looking so very terribly suave. My heart, momentarily forgetting that it shouldn’t, does a couple of somersaults and throws in a back flip for good measure. I can’t believe that he’s here, as large as life.
Marcus.
I shouldn’t feel relieved either, but I am. He’s making his way towards me now with two glasses in his hands. Slowly, but not so terrified as I was a moment ago, I descend the stairs. I know someone. I know someone here. And I’m almost giddy with the knowledge. Even though it’s Marcus.
‘Hey,’ he says when I reach him.
‘Hey to you.’
He smiles more than a little smugly as he hands over a glass. ‘Did you know that the shape of a champagne bowl was modelled on Marie Antoinette’s breasts?’
‘No, Marcus. I did not.’
‘Things you didn’t know, eh?’ He raises an eyebrow. ‘Thanks for the text, by the way.’
‘It was a mistake. Obviously. The least said about that the better.’
‘I thought you were grateful for the arrival gifts.’
‘I am,’ I hiss. ‘But not that grateful.’
Marcus is completely unfazed.
‘I didn’t know that you were going to be here, Marcus. You specifically said that you weren’t.’ I lower my voice even though there’s no one listening. ‘What on earth brought you here? And if you say the Eurostar, I might have to punch you.’
‘I got an opportunity to come along at the last minute,’ Marcus says smoothly. ‘My meeting was cancelled. I thought I might come and give you moral support. That sort of thing. As friends do.’ He’s looking at me over the top of his glass as he drinks and his eyes twinkle in the light of the dozens of fabulously ornate chandeliers. ‘I thought you might even be pleased to see me.’
I can’t deny that I am. ‘I was scared to death,’ I admit, clutching his arm. ‘I’m on my own and my knees are shaking.’
‘I thought you were coming with Chantal?’
‘Sick baby,’ I explain. ‘Getting dumped seems to be my fall-back plan.’
‘Sorry to hear that.’ Marcus looks at me sadly. ‘I want to make sure that you have a good time. Bruges is fabulous and this ball is one of the highlights. Everyone who’s anyone is here. Can I ride in on my trusty white charger and be your knight in shining armour?’
‘It would be a first.’ I shouldn’t let Marcus know just how very grateful I am to see him. That way danger lies.
He looks suitably chastened and I relent. Marcus has actually set all this up for me and the ball does look fabulous.
‘Maybe you can be my knight in shining armour just for tonight while Aiden isn’t here,’ I offer. ‘I am glad that you’re here. Really. I was so scared that I was about to turn and flee back to the hotel.’
He frowns. ‘Surely not?’
‘All these people seem so well to do. Look at them. There’s not a single person here who is not “labelled” up to the hilt.’
‘You look as beautiful as any of them. More so.’
‘Thanks.’ I pull in my stomach. ‘Remember when you bought me this dress?’
Marcus nods. ‘Of course I do. And you still look fabulous in it.’
I get a flashback to Marcus slowly taking me out of the dress after the party, and damp it down. It was the one thing in our relationship that Marcus was very, very good at. It was also a shame that he felt the need to practise his skills with every other woman who crossed his path. It would bode me well to keep that to the front of my mind.
‘Come on,’ Marcus says. ‘We’ll do the rounds. I’ll introduce you to some of them.’
‘You know people here?’
‘Quite a few,’ he admits. ‘And there’s a sprinkling of celebrities too. We can do a bit of star-spotting.’
‘Wow.’ Marcus never ceases to amaze me. ‘I thought I might be able to home in on a few friendly faces at my talk. By the way, how come it was moved?’
‘Ah,’ Marcus says. ‘Bad news. It’s been cancelled. Pressure of suitable space.’
‘Really? How do you know?’
‘Er . . . Checked in with the festival office when I got here.’
Why didn’t I think to
do that? But then it said nothing about it on my information pack, such as it was.
Marcus tucks my arm in his and steers me into the crowd. ‘We ought to have more champagne in commiseration.’
He stops the passing waiter and changes our empty glasses for full ones.
‘I’ve already had a shed load of this,’ I confess as I drink it down. ‘I cracked open the bottle you sent me and drank half of it in the bath.’
‘That’s an image I like,’ Marcus says with a smug smile. ‘Was it before or after you sent me that charming text?’
‘Stop it,’ I tell him. ‘You have to forget you ever saw that.’
‘Of course,’ he grins. ‘I’ll do my very best.’
‘This is business,’ I remind him. ‘I’m here to do networking and stuff.’
‘Of course. Hungry?’
‘Starving.’
‘Let’s have something to eat first before we do the rounds. Essential networking should never be done on an empty stomach.’
Perhaps we might even bump into someone who is rich enough to lend me the dosh to buy Chocolate Heaven from Clive and Tristan. I should tell Marcus about that, but I don’t want my bad news to spoil the evening. This is a very lovely place. It’s not often I get to rub shoulders with the rich and famous. I’m more of a hoi-polloi kinda gal.
Marcus takes my hand and looks at me with such sincerity in his eyes that it takes my breath away. ‘Tell me you’re happy that you came.’
‘Yes,’ I confess, ‘I am.’
‘Let’s get stuck in then.’ He claps his hands together. ‘Some of the chocolate here is amazing. You’ll be bowled over.’
Chocolate. And that, of course, is the magic word as I suddenly start to relax.
Chapter Forty-Five
Autumn had been busy all day at Chocolate Heaven, but she’d really enjoyed herself. Thankfully, Stacey had stepped into the breach and had looked after Lewis to help out Nadia. Lucy’s festive offerings had kept the till ringing all day, but now the customers were starting to tail off as it was nearly time for mums to collect their children from school. Autumn realised that her feet were hurting and she’d be more than ready to slump on the sofa this evening.
It helped that she’d sneaked a few of her favourite treats during small lulls between serving customers to keep her going. No wonder Lucy liked working here. If she was out of a job at the Stolford Centre, she wouldn’t mind it on a more permanent basis herself and she knew that Lucy could do with an extra hand. Most days she was run ragged.
It was nice that Lucy had finally managed to get away for a break, even though it wasn’t quite the romantic weekend she’d envisaged. She hoped that Lucy and Chantal were having a great time in Bruges. Perhaps it was something they could all do next Christmas. A chocolate festival and a Christmas market. In the next quiet moment, she should find time to text them both and see how they were getting on.
Then half a dozen customers arrived in quick succession and she was busy heaping their plates with brownies, tiramisu cake and chocolates. The coffee machine was, once again, on overdrive.
The next time she glanced up Chantal was coming through the door.
‘I thought you were in Bruges with Lucy?’
‘Lana was too ill for me to risk leaving her this morning,’ Chantal answered wearily. ‘I’ve been up half the night with her. My child is a puking and pooing machine. She finally went to sleep about half an hour ago, so I scrubbed myself down with disinfectant and made my escape. I’ve left her with Ted for an hour.’
‘You look worn out.’
‘That doesn’t begin to describe how I feel.’ She rolled her eyes. ‘Hit me with whatever you’ve got to make me feel human again.’
‘Go and find a comfy seat. We have some lovely, fresh double vanilla muffins piped with buttercream and topped with strawberries. They look like Santa’s hats.’
‘Who cares what they look like? Bring me one.’
Autumn laughed. ‘I think I’d better fix you some double-strength coffee too.’
‘That’s more like it.’ Chantal lets out a long, heartfelt sigh. ‘Sounds like bliss.’
As she headed towards the vacant sofa in the window, Autumn bustled about making the order, added a latte for herself and then took it over to her friend.
A weak shaft of sunlight coming through the window fell on Chantal’s face, and her friend had her eyes closed, enjoying the warmth. As there were no customers at the counter, Autumn sat down next to her for a well-earned break.
‘How’s Lana now?’
‘Exhausted and looking very pale. But at least she’s stopped ejecting bodily fluids from every orifice.’
Autumn grimaced.
‘It scared me to death, I can tell you. Whoever said that having kids was fun is a complete idiot.’
‘But you wouldn’t be without her now?’
Chantal’s face softened. ‘I’d lay down my life for her. Who wouldn’t do that for their child?’
Autumn felt her heart racing. ‘I have something to tell you.’ Her palms were all sweaty. ‘I have to get it off my chest or I think I’ll go mad.’
Her friend raised an eyebrow.
‘I have a daughter,’ Autumn said.
At that, Chantal sat bolt upright. ‘What?’
‘A daughter,’ Autumn repeated. It still sounded unreal, even to her own ears. ‘I had her when I was a teenager and was made to give her away.’ Hot tears prickled her eyes. ‘She’ll be a teenager herself now.’
‘Wow.’ Chantal looked as if she’d been sucker-punched. ‘I’m guessing that none of the other girls know?’
Autumn shook her head. ‘I’ve never told anyone. Until last week. It’s not an easy thing to admit to. I’ve always felt so ashamed that I let her go up for adoption.’
Chantal put an arm round her and hugged her. ‘Why didn’t you tell us?’
‘I’d never really come to terms with it. Not even after all these years. You just cope, don’t you? Mostly. Now it all seems to have come to the surface again. I don’t know whether it’s because I’m spending so much time with Lewis or if it’s due to Lana and Elsie being around, but I’m suddenly unable to push it to the back of my mind anymore.’ Autumn let out a weary sigh. ‘They may have taken the baby out of my arms, but they’ve never taken the love for her out of my heart.’
‘Oh, sweetheart.’ Chantal wiped a tear from her eye.
‘All I’ve done is squash it down. That’s been my coping mechanism for all these years.’
‘I never knew.’ Chantal looked at her coffee. ‘I think I could do with a double brandy in this. You probably need one, too.’
Autumn gave a teary laugh. ‘Doesn’t Lucy have a secret stash here?’
‘She should.’
‘With Rich having gone, too, it suddenly made me realise that I’ve got family out there, my own flesh and blood. A daughter.’
‘Wow.’ Chantal still looked stunned. ‘What are you going to do? What can you do?’
‘I don’t know yet. I’ve started to look online at what my options are. I want her to know that I didn’t give her up lightly. At the time, I felt that I had no choice. You know what my parents are like.’
‘It sounds like something they made people do in the sixties, not when you were a teenager.’
‘It was terrible and I felt powerless.’
‘I’m not surprised. How cruel of them.’
‘All I can hope now is that I’ll have a chance to put it right. At least explain to Willow what happened. She should know. Yet without the permission of her adopted parents, she can only look for me in a few years when she turns eighteen. But I can put my name out there to say that I’m looking for her. That’s what I’m going to do. I want it to be on every adoption reunion site available. If she does ever decide to look for me then I want it to be very easy for her to find me.’ Autumn pressed her lips together to stop herself from crying.
‘We can help you,’ Chantal said. ‘Whatever it takes, we’ll be
there for you.’
Tears squeezed out of her eyes. ‘I want my baby back,’ Autumn said bleakly. ‘I know nothing about her and that’s gnawing at me. Has she been looked after well when she’s been sick? What kind of girl is she now? I would so love to know.’
Chantal soothed her, rocking her as she would Lana. ‘My poor love.’
‘When I think of all those years I’ve been without her, it breaks my heart. I want all that time with her back. And that’s something that can never happen.’
Chapter Forty-Six
Chantal texted Ted to find out how he was coping. Lana, he told her, was still fast asleep and her temperature seemed to be coming down nicely. It meant that she had time to snatch another much-needed coffee. She was still deep in thought about Autumn’s situation. If only she’d told them before, maybe they could have helped her or been more sensitive. How awful to have all these babies waved in your face when you were feeling bereft.
Fancy having to hold in a secret like that. It wasn’t right. Poor Autumn. Chantal only hoped that there would, eventually, be a good resolution to this. Perhaps now that it was out in the open it would be easier for her to talk about. She loved Lana so much she couldn’t even begin to imagine how hard that must have been for Autumn.
Now her friend was busy with customers again and their conversation had come to a halt, so it was lovely when the door to Chocolate Heaven swung open and Stacey came in, loaded with shopping.
Chantal stood up to kiss her. ‘How nice to see you.’
Stacey frowned. ‘I thought you were going away with Lucy?’
‘Change of plan. Lana’s poorly.’
‘Oh no. I’m sorry to hear that.’
‘It was such a worry, but she seems a bit brighter now. I’m not staying for long as I left Ted on duty for an hour and he’ll be panicking.’
‘I wondered why he hadn’t called me,’ Stacey mused and Chantal felt a nip of jealousy. She wondered if Ted and Stacey had made plans for the weekend while she was away. Plans that would now have to be cancelled. Ted hadn’t said anything and it looked as if Stacey wasn’t going to enlighten her further.