“What’s that? Her courage?”
He shook his head. “No. Her heart.” He tossed a tip on the table and stood. “I’ve never come close to my happy ending yet, Cassie, but if I knew it was waiting for me back in California, I would be on the next plane heading west faster than a blue whale chases krill.”
I lifted a brow at him. “Another blue whale analogy?”
He threw his scarf around his neck. “Don’t ask me why.”
I led the way through the maze of deli customers.
“I think I might have fallen asleep watching one of those nature channels.”
I glanced back at him with another raised brow.
“What? I like nature.”
We stepped out onto the sidewalk. The garlic and onion aroma of the deli seemed to follow us out. “Just didn’t picture you watching stuff about whales. Maybe whales with scarves.”
We headed back to the magazine offices, and in the few, short blocks that separated the deli from our building, I’d made a huge decision. I needed to go back home.
Chapter 31
Dray
Barrett tied his long hair back and went over to the weights. “You coming to Nix’s house tonight? I’m going up north next Monday for that job and I won’t be back for awhile. So you need to come. It’s my last party down here.”
I sat on the bench and opened a bottle of water. “I don’t think so.” I threw my head back and the water cascaded down my dry throat.
Barrett set down the barbell and looked at me. “Look, you’ve got to stop this shit. You’re like a goddamn hermit these days.” He walked over and picked up his towel off the bench. “That crap in Mexico is behind us. I’m sorry about the whole thing. I should never have talked you into it.” He sat down next to me. “But you need to get out of this hole you’ve crawled into.”
I leaned my forearms on my thighs and tossed the empty water bottle around in my hands. “Can’t seem to pull myself out of it this time, Rett. I’m just tired of things always going wrong.”
“We all take wrong turns.” He laughed. “Hell, no one does it better than me. But the shit won’t quit rolling over you unless you do something to stop it. Sometimes I think you avoid good things just because, for some stupid reason, you’ve convinced yourself you don’t deserve them.” He hesitated before speaking again. “Cassie will be at Nix’s. She’s been back for a couple of weeks, and you still haven’t seen her. Don’t you think it’s time?”
I didn’t answer. When Nix had told me that Cassie had quit the job in New York and returned to work at Freefall, I’d had to work hard not to react. The dream job hadn’t turned out the way she’d planned. She’d rented the back house of Nix’s neighbors, so she’d be as close as ever now. I knew she’d missed her friends, but I wasn’t convinced that I’d played any part in her return. She hadn’t called me since she’d returned. She might have been three thousand miles closer, but we were still far apart.
Barrett pressed his hand on my shoulder. “I’m going to head in and shower. Do something, Dray. It sucks seeing you like this.” He stood. “And, frankly, you’re a fucking bore these days.” He walked away.
I headed over to the bags and pounded on one for as long as my hands could take it. Anger had followed me home from Mexico, and I hadn’t been able to cope with it yet. The dirty fight, my friends having to come in and save me and Cassie seeing me in jail, the whole thing had left a bitter taste in my mouth. I’d been stunned by Cassie’s presence in Mexico. I hated that she’d seen me so fucked up, yet in the car, when I’d curled up in the corner of the backseat feeling about as crappy as I’d ever felt in my entire life, I could not stop myself from seeking the comfort of her nearness. I’d laid my head on her lap, and she’d press her palm against my face. At that moment, I hadn’t cared that I looked weak. I wanted her to touch me. I wanted her to take care of me as much as I wanted to take care of her. But then she’d left Mexico without a word.
“What the hell did that punching bag ever do to you, Warner?” Tank came up on the side of the bag and handed me a towel.
I dragged the towel down my face and through my hair. “I needed to punch something, and it was just hanging there asking for it.”
“I know what you mean. Sometimes it just feels good to punch the shit out of something.” Tank smiled. “I guess that’s why we took up fighting as a sport.”
“What’s up with your golf hobby?”
Tank took a deep breath and surveyed the gym, the business he’d built from nothing. “Thinking about having a driving range put in. What do you think?”
“Hell no,” I said. “Those golf balls are dangerous.”
“Well, my retirement lasted for about all of a month. I knew that idiot stepson couldn’t handle running the place. He took off for some job in Arizona and good riddance.”
“I second that.” I walked over and picked up a jump rope.
Tank was looking at me with an unusual twinkle in his eye. “Hey, Warner, I just had an idea.”
I flicked the jump rope overhead. “Yeah? What’s that?”
“Why don’t you manage the place for me?”
The rope caught on my foot and I stopped. “Are you serious?”
He nodded. “Why not? You know this place better than anyone. The guys respect you. And last I heard you were looking for work.” He walked closer. “I think you’d be good at it.”
I shook my head and laughed. “Yeah, I don’t know about that, Tank. I’m a lot better at fucking up than I am at doing things right.”
Tank looked at me. I’d always had great respect for the guy. “Listen, Dray, the old man is gone now. You can stop hiding under that cloak of failure. You’re the best damn fighter that’s every passed through that door. You can run this place. I’m sure of it. What do you say? I’m supposed to go to Hawaii next week to golf, and I’m going to have to cancel if I don’t find someone to mind the gym.”
I rubbed my hand through my hair and smiled at him. “So this is less about me being capable of running the place and more about you wearing your sweet, little golfing shorts in Hawaii.”
“Damn right my shorts are sweet, and stop using my words against me, Warner. What do you say? You could run the place while I’m gone and then we’ll see how it goes. You interested?”
Barrett walked out from the locker room. “See you at Nix’s,” he called as he headed to the exit. His earlier words played back in my head. Maybe it was time to stop the flow of shit. Maybe it was time to go after something good.
“Hell yeah, I want the job. And thanks.”
Chapter 32
Cassie
There were a ton of people at Nix’s party. More than I’d expected. It felt right to be around everyone again standing in our shorts, sandals and sundresses, sipping cold beers. But there was one face noticeably absent from the sea of familiar faces, and it was the one face I longed more than ever to see. He hadn’t called me, and now it seemed that he was avoiding his best friend’s party and Barrett’s send off just to avoid me. Or maybe I was putting too much stock into thinking that he gave a damn enough about me to care whether he saw me or not. We’d been apart for months, but the hurt was still as fresh as if we’d just broken up yesterday. For some silly reason I’d convinced myself the heartbreak would fade with time. I’d been wrong.
A warm Santa Ana breeze tickled the Jacaranda tree shading Nix’s and Scotlyn’s little backyard. Music buzzed through the screen door. I sat at the table and sipped the Pina Colada Scotlyn had made me. She and Taylor came out of the house with Barrett in tow. He looked as if he’d been shanghaied into doing something he would rather not do. They came and sat down across from me. Scotlyn pointed to the bench like a teacher telling a student to sit. Barrett reluctantly threw his long legs over the bench and sat.
Scotlyn’s blue eyes sparkled with enthusiasm. “We girls have a new task. We are going to be matchmakers and find the perfect girl for Barrett.”
Barrett looked over at me. “I already
told them that every girl is perfect, and that’s the problem— I can’t just pick one.”
“You’re full of shit,” Taylor waved him off. “All right, first of all— do you prefer brunette, blonde, ginger or bald?”
“Yes,” Barrett said confidently.
“Which one?” Taylor asked.
“All of them.”
“Even bald?” I asked.
He shrugged. “Could be sexy.”
Taylor continued her interview unabated. “Are you a leg, breast or butt man?”
“Yes.”
Taylor groaned. “Shit, you really are a cad.”
Clutch walked over seemingly aware of Scotlyn’s and Taylor’s scheme. He looked down at them. “Do you girls really want to be responsible for setting this asshole up with a girl?”
Scotlyn looked over at Taylor. “I guess it’s probably too risky. We’ll have some girl stalking us for revenge.”
Barrett stood up as if he’d been freed from some shackles. “Thank you, big brother . . . I think.”
We all slid out from the bench. Nix was busy filling plastic cups with beer from a keg. He glanced up as I approached.
“Hey, Cass, you need a beer?”
I lifted my Pina Colada. “Nix, maybe I should go.”
“What? No, why?”
“Then you could tell him that I’m not here.”
He lowered the nozzle on the keg and stepped out from behind it. “No, Cassie, he’s just been really down since his trip. I know Dray. He can get into these really dark funks, but he always comes back out of it.” Nix looked over my shoulder, and his pale eyes narrowed with a smile. “In fact . . .” He motioned almost imperceptibly at something behind me. I sucked in a breath. Nix winked at me and I turned slowly around. The music was the only sound in the yard as everyone fell silent.
Dray’s hands opened and closed and his chest rose and fell as he stared at me with that intense gaze that could throw me into an instant dizzy spell. And it had. I swallowed hard not completely sure what was coming next. I never knew what was coming next with Dray.
He stepped closer. Some of the bruises and cuts from the terrible fight in Mexico were still visible on his face, and, for a second, I was carried back to that horrid moment when I’d first seen him in that awful jail cell.
“Dray,” the name rolled off my bottom lip, and he closed his eyes briefly as if he was catching and absorbing the sound of it.
“I love you,” his voice was low and deep, and he didn’t seem to care that the entire party had stopped to pay attention. “I love you, Cassie. You want me to beg?” He held his hands out. “I’ll fucking beg. You can keep taking pictures, and you can travel all over the damn world as long as when you come home, you come home to me.”
A sob escaped me.
“Please, Cassie, come home to me.”
My feet flew forward, and I jumped into his arms, those unbelievable arms that always made me feel safe and wanted. He tightened his iron strong hold around me. It felt as if he could easily squeeze the breath out of me. But he’d already taken it away. I pressed my face against his shoulder, and suddenly, the party seemed way too crowded.
“Take me home, Dray,” I whispered.
He dropped his arms, grabbed my hand and dragged me through the maze of party-goers.
“I’m renting the back house next door.” By the time the last word left my mouth, he had me halfway up the narrow path leading to my tiny rental. The heated tension surrounding him was palpable, and it made me both nervous and thrilled at the same time. I fumbled with the key in the door fearing that if I didn’t open it quickly, he might very well rip it off its hinges.
We pushed inside, and he slammed it shut behind us. I hadn’t taken one step when he grabbed my waist and pulled me against his hard body. I threw my arms around his neck, and our mouths slammed together. He wrenched up the hem of my dress. His calloused fingertips grazed me as he tore the string on my panties. There had been no foreplay, no coaxing, no tenderness, yet I wanted him so badly I could not catch my breath. He pushed my dress up high, pulled his mouth from mine and gazed brazenly down at me. A wave of moist heat surged between my legs.
I opened the fly on his jeans and pushed them down below his hips. His thick, hard erection sprung free. He fished clumsily in his pocket for his wallet and yanked out a condom. Without warning, he lifted me off my feet and pressed my back up against the wall. My legs wrapped around his waist.
His long lashes lifted, and he stared at me with a hunger I’d never seen before. The green and gold flecks in his hazel eyes glittered with fire. “God, Cass, do you know what you do to me?” His voice was low and thick with need, and I nearly climaxed at the sound of it.
His mouth devoured mine as he held me against the hard wall. My legs tightened around his waist and my arms tangled around his neck as he thrust inside of me. I was pressed between his body and the wall as he drove himself inside of me at a nearly violent pace. And still I wanted more of him.
My arms squeezed around his neck. I pressed my mouth to his ear. “Harder,” I whispered.
His hips moved at a fevered pace, and I used my legs to pull him against me. Then his fingers dug into my flesh, and we’d both reached the point of no return. He impaled me over and over again as my swollen clitoris took every impact with sweet torture. Then my muscles clenched and twitched. I screamed out as I climaxed around him. His thrusts quickened and his arms tightened like vices around me. Then his head lolled back and he groaned in release.
My back slid slowly down the wall as I lowered my legs to the floor. But Dray kept me pressed there. He leaned against me and kissed me tenderly, a stark contrast to the sex we’d just had. He gazed at me as if he was trying to decide if I was real or not.
“Cass, I’m sorry it took me so long to come to my senses. It’s been hard convincing myself that I deserve you.”
I pressed my palm against the side of his face. “Sometimes I think I was put on this earth for the sole purpose of being yours. I don’t belong with anyone else but you, Dray Warner.”
“I meant what I said out there. I won’t stand in the way of your life, your dream. You can chase your pictures all the way around the world. Just always come back to me.”
I wrapped my arms around his neck and smiled. “You can’t possible stand in the way of my dream when you are a big part of it.” I reached down and pulled my dress up and over my head. I stood completely naked in front of him, wearing only a wicked smile. His gaze lowered, and he stared down at my bare body. Then he looked up at me.
I leaned forward and kissed him. “Tag, you’re it.” I slid past him and raced to the bedroom. He followed.
Chapter 33
Dray
Cassie hadn’t heard me get up. She was leaning over the sink pouring water into a little pot of herbs perched on the window ledge. A creak in the floor gave away my presence, and she turned around and smiled. We’d stayed tucked naked in each other’s arms all night, and the entire time, I’d had to remind myself not to hold her too tightly.
Her dark eyes rounded. “Look at that rib cage. Have you been eating?”
“You’re asking me if I’ve been eating?”
She scurried over to the refrigerator. “I’m going to make you some eggs.” She pulled out the eggs and carried them to the counter. She cracked them over a bowl and picked up the salt shaker.
I crossed the tile floor in three steps. My arm snaked around her tiny waist. She dropped the salt onto the counter and pressed her back against my chest. I needed to touch her again. I was still trying to convince myself that she was really standing there in my arms. So much had happened in the past few months, shit that had made me reach a level of despair that I’d never felt before, and now none of it mattered. Cassie was the only person who could wipe away all the bad. Everything about her was so right, so perfect that everything was brighter with her just standing in the room.
I lowered my mouth to her ear and her head rested back against me.
“There’s only one thing I want right now.”
She turned around in my arms and stared up at me with her amazing dark eyes. “So, the eggs are out?”
I smiled. “Yeah.” I slid my thigh between her legs. “I’ve got months of touching to make up and I plan to make up for every lost kiss,” I leaned forward and kissed her, “and every lost caress,” I smoothed my rough fingertips across her cheek, “and all the other really important stuff we’ve been missing out on.”
She placed her arms around my neck. “I have always been especially fond of stuff.”
“Good.” I took her hand to lead her back to the bedroom but she stopped.
“Wait,” she turned back to the counter and pinched some crystals of salt and threw them back over her shoulder. She shrugged. “Why test fate?”
I reached for the salt and threw some over my shoulder. She smiled with surprise.
“Hey, I’ve tempted fate just a little too often lately.” I pulled her against me. “And I don’t plan on ever tempting it again.” I lowered my mouth to her lips and kissed her.
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