Her eyes widen as she sits there silently. I can’t figure out what she’s thinking and it’s killing me having to wait.
“Say something,” I urge.
“I love you too.”
The four words I wanted to hear.
I dig out the small box from my pocket and let go of her hand, replacing it with her present.
“I got you something, so you don’t forget about me,” I laugh, nervously.
“It would be impossible to forget you,” she laughs herself.
She opens the box and stares at the necklace I brought for her. A Leo star sign pendent hangs from the white gold chain and she runs her finger over it and smiles.
“It’s the only thing I could find close to my name that your parents wouldn’t figure out.”
“I love it,” she smiles, looking up at me, “Will you help me put it on?”
I make quick work getting the necklace out and opening the clasp while she pulls her hair to the side and holds it up to make way for me.
The pendent sits perfectly above the tip of her cleavage. Beautiful.
“What are we going to do about our parents?” she asks.
“My dad knows I’m seeing someone and my mom will be happy I’m happy. It’s your parents that will have a problem with me, especially your dad.”
“Then we won’t tell them, yet.” She moves closer and positions herself on my lap, making herself comfortable.
“You’re officially mine,” I growl, winding my hand around the back of her neck and pulling her closer to me.
I could not be happier.
India
My body is frozen behind the wheel. My mind is back home with Leo at the cabin. Every thought running through me is screaming at me not to get out of the car. I people watch and there are people everywhere smiling and excited, rushing around with their bags and boxes.
It feels wrong to me, I can already tell I don’t belong here.
A message comes through on my phone and the ping makes me jump in the broken silence.
‘Counting down the days until I see you again. I love you.’
His words pull me home and yet I’m still not moving. I could cry but I hold the tears in and rub the pendent Leo gave me. It was the hardest thing I’ve done in my life so far leaving him at the cabin as we said goodbye.
My door swings open and I hear Dad chuckling as he holds his hand out for me.
“What are you waiting for, princess?” he asks.
They’re so proud of me, I don’t want to disappoint them, so I take his hand and he helps pull me out.
“You’re going to love it here, sweetheart,” Mom coos and I have to stop myself from letting my true feelings burst free.
“My baby girl is starting college, I still can’t believe it,” Dad adds.
“Believe it, you’re the one making me go,” I mumble under my breath.
“Give it a chance, you’ll love it.”
It’s like, if they tell me I’ll love it enough times I’ll believe it and I’ll love it, they’ll be right and I’ll be wrong and everything in the world will be perfect.
They start collecting boxes and bags from the trunk and passes one over to me. Mom has already memorized the map of the place and knows exactly where we’re going.
I follow behind like the obedient daughter I am, and I wonder if I tell them about Leo, will they finally understand and let me come home without a fight.
I debate telling them about our relationship during the three trips it takes to get all my stuff up to my dorm room and I’m brought out of my haze when I hear dad growl like a freaking bear.
Holding the door open for me, he frowns as I pass.
“Remember you’re here to learn, not to get tied down with a boy.”
“What?”
“Guys, they are a no go.”
Did I say something out loud?
“Dad, I haven’t even seen a guy yet.”
“Really, you didn’t just see that guy pass you by, looking at you?”
He did?
“No.”
Back in my room, the guy who apparently checked me out is long forgotten and I fall back on the bed that my mom has managed to make while we went for the last of the boxes.
The room itself is small, and I can’t breathe. It’s suffocating and stifling.
“Don’t look so scared,” mom chuckles, opening another box.
“It’s too small, and it smells funny.”
“No, it doesn’t, stop picking faults where there aren’t any.”
“My stuff is never going to fit in here.”
“If your dad didn’t spoil you so much, you’d be grateful for this opportunity.”
Dad winks at me behind her back and I smother a smile.
“Do you want us to stay and help you unpack?”
“No, it will give me something to do when you leave and abandon me.”
“Honestly, India. Going off to college is a normal rite of passage. A lot of kids would love to be in your position with parents footing the bill.”
A lot of kids weren’t brought up the same as I was, but I have a life back home I’m content to carry on living.
I said I’d call Leo the moment my parents left. I retrieve my phone from my bag and hit his number that has been top of my call list for many weeks now.
He answers on the second ring, and it makes me happy to think he was waiting by the phone for me. He was probably just holding it, but still, it could be possible.
“Hey, babe. You got there okay then?” he asks first.
“Yeah, mom and dad just left.”
“How you doing?”
“I’m missing you.”
“Yeah, I’m missing you too. But, I’m coming up to see you next weekend, it will fly by.”
“I hope you’re right.”
I really do, because right now, I hate it here and he’s far away back at the club.
Leo
Three hours. That’s how many hours sleep I’ve had before someone is knocking on my door. It’s more of a tapping noise, then full out knocking. The room spins around me as I stand and make my way over to the door. I swear to god, whoever is on the other side is going to fly down the stairs after I’ve kicked them down there for waking me up.
Throwing open the door, I think I’m still drunk, or dreaming. India stands before me, cloaked in her jacket with her hood up to hide her face.
For a few brief seconds, I stand there and try to figure out if she’s real. She left, Slade and Kristen went with her and came back alone. I saw them without her after they came to the club for a drink.
“Are you going to let me in?” she whispers.
She’s real. I’m still a little drunk but she’s real.
I reach out and pull her in, closing the door quickly behind her. Wrapping my arms around her, she holds me back and snuggles against my chest.
Her breath hits my skin and sets me on fire. She’s definitely real.
“What’s wrong? How are you here?” I ask both questions, needing all the details.
When she doesn’t say anything, I pull away from her and search her face.
Physically, she looks fine but she’s still making me worry.
“Talk to me,” I urge her, “Why are you here and not at college?”
“I couldn’t do it, I stayed for three hours and even that was too long.”
“So, you drove home?”
It’s the middle of the fucking night, I’m angry she drove most of the night alone. Anything could’ve happened, especially with the Black Crows sniffing around. She sits on the edge of my bed and I fall beside her.
“I wouldn’t have wanted to be you when you got home, I bet your dad wasn’t happy,” I chuckle.
“He doesn’t know, I came straight here when I saw your bike outside.”
Oh fuck.
I sit up and rest my head in my hands. Slade is going to freak the fuck out.
“No one saw me, I sneak in through the side door an
d came up the back stairs.”
It’s clear to see how unhappy she is, and I wrap my arm around her and stroke her hair.
“What are you going to do?”
“I’m going to tell my parents that college is a no-go. I’m staying home…with you.”
“I can’t be the reason you give up before you’ve started. You didn’t stay long enough to give it a chance.”
“Wouldn’t you prefer me to be home so we can be together?”
“Of course, I fucking would, but I won’t be the guy you resent when you look back in years to come because we wanted to be together. I promised I’d wait for you and visit, I’ll keep my word.”
She untucks herself from me and gets up, moving too far away from me.
“You don’t understand,” she sighs, “I never wanted to go to college, why would you be the one I resent?”
“Your parents will blame me for sure.”
“They’ll get over it.”
She’s adamant she doesn’t want to be there, I should be happy there’s a possibility she could be staying in town, in my life, but it doesn’t sit right with me.
“You’re scared, it’s all new and away from me and home but there’s nothing to be afraid of…”
“I thought you’d be happy to see me,” she throws in my face.
“I am, honestly, I am.”
“You’re not acting like it, or maybe me at college is how you want it. Be with me when I’m home and then the whores around here while I’m gone.”
What the fuck? Now I know I must be dreaming to be hearing this shit.
“Is that what you really think? That I would betray you?”
She’s angry because I don’t understand, I’m raging because she doesn’t know me as well as I thought she did. She was the first girl who didn’t care about the previous girls I’d been with, and now she’s throwing them in my face.
“Why else would you not want me home?”
“Fuck this, I’m not doing this with you.”
“That doesn’t answer my question.”
“Don’t you trust me?” I spit out.
She turns her back on me and doesn’t answer me.
“Forget it, I shouldn’t have come,” she mutters and moves for the door.
I shoot forward and block the only exit. She isn’t causing this shit storm and walking out on me.
“Why can’t you hear that I don’t want you to miss out on anything because of me. I told you I would wait and I fucking will.”
“Because it’s not what I want to hear,” she hisses.
“That’s real childish, babe, maybe you should go.”
I move out of her way and swing the door open. She doesn’t hesitate to leave and slams the door as she goes.
Seriously, what the hell just happened. I went to bed missing my girl and I woke up to her for her to storm out less than ten minutes later.
Banging my head against the wooden door, I try to clear the alcohol but fail. Slipping into my jeans, I whack on my boots and run for the stairs. I make it outside as her taillights are driving through the gates and then she’s gone. I kick at the gravel in frustration and head back inside.
I run up to my room and scramble around to find my phone. It’s under an empty beer bottle on the nightstand.
The screen lights up at my touch and I hit up her number on the contacts list. It rings out till her voicemail cuts in and I hang up. I try again and get her voicemail. Fuck.
The first thing I do when I wake up is reach for my phone and call India, ignoring the pounding ache in my head. What a fucking surprise, she doesn’t answer. I don’t bother leaving her a message and hang up.
Shoving my jeans on, I slip my boots on, and look around for my keys. I can’t see them anywhere and I throw open the door. I must’ve left them in the bar last night. Shit, I shouldn’t have drunk so much. Each step down causes a tornado of dizziness and I stop at the bottom of the stairs to make sure I’m not going to empty my stomach where I stand.
Slade bolts through the door and my gut drops when he’s alone. It doesn’t surprise me that India isn’t with him, she wouldn’t want to be here after our showdown or whatever the fuck that was in the night.
“Hey, did India get off to college okay?”
“Why do you care?” he snaps, clearly pissed about something and I want to know what.
“I was only asking,” I grunt, as I would’ve normally remarked if I weren’t in love with his daughter and desperate to know where she is.
He marches over to my dad and Sparky and slumps down on a chair at their table. I move to the couches to get in a better position to hear him and close my eyes, pretending not to be listening.
“What the fuck has crawled up your ass today?” Sparky asks, amused.
“India showed up at dawn this morning in floods of tears and won’t tell us why. Kris is taking her back now, hopefully she settles in soon.”
“Sounds like she doesn’t want to be there, brother,” Dad says, his tone is flat.
“She hasn’t given it a fucking chance, but she’s agreed to try now. Kris is going to stay close for a few days.”
She’s gone. She blew back like a hurricane in the dead of night and now she’s gone. Not even giving me the curtesy of answering her phone. I still can’t work out what the fuck happened between us, but I want to fix it.
The old timers move on from India and I pull myself up and go in search for coffee. The kitchen is empty, but the coffee pot is still half full. I pour myself a large mug full to the brim. Hopefully the caffeine will shift this headache. I don’t bother with sugar or cream and inhale it black.
“I understand now why you wouldn’t tell me who you’re seeing.”
Dad is standing in the doorway and Slade isn’t the only one who’s pissed.
“What are you talking about, old man?” I say, stalling for a beat.
“I stayed here last night after we got back, I couldn’t sleep so I went out for a smoke and guess who I saw leaving, crying her heart out?”
Keeping my mouth shut, I pour another coffee and this time, I add cream for something to do so I don’t have to look at my dad.
“And guess who I saw running out after her? It was quite the scene, all romantic and shit like the movies your mom watches.”
“Dad…”
He steps into the kitchen and shuts the door. He nods to the table and sits down. I join him and brace myself for a lecture I’m sure he has lined up.
“Listen to me,” he begins as if I have any other choice, “Slade has been my brother for over thirty years, he’s been loyal to me and he’s fiercely protective, especially when it comes to India. Do you know, when she was born he didn’t sleep for the first three days, he wouldn’t leave her side for three months. He drove Kris crazy, so much so, she came to me and begged me to take him on a run to get him out from under her feet. The only way he would come is if we all vowed we would kill anyone who hurt her,” he pauses and pulls out his smokes, “You weren’t wrong when you said you were putting me in a shitty position. You know when I give my word, I mean it. I raised you and your brother the same. Tell me why she was crying.”
“We were arguing because she’s adamant she doesn’t want to be at college and I was trying to convince her she should give it a go.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, don’t sound so surprised,” I snort, “So, now you know who I’m seeing, do you have a problem with it?”
“No, however, talk to Slade sooner rather than later. No good will come from this if he catches you or hears it from someone else.”
I nod, “Do you have my back if he makes it a problem? Because I’m not giving her up.”
Even though she’s ignoring me right now. Dad finds this funny and I relax.
“I’ve had your back from the moment your mom told me she was pregnant with you, however, you’re a Jackson and take after me, I should really have Slade’s back.”
I chuckle and finish my coffee. I remain at
the table as dad heaves himself up to his feet.
“You have chosen the one girl in this club that could get you killed, whatever you do, please fuckin’ treat her good and never ever let Slade see her crying over you. Fuck, don’t make her cry at all.”
With a deep chuckle, he leaves the kitchen and I sit back in my chair. I call India again and it rings out till it goes to voicemail. I love the sound of my girl’s voice, but I can’t listen to her voice message again without losing my mind.
India
“What aren’t you telling me? Mom asks, sitting across the table from me in the restaurant closest to the college.
We’re waiting on dessert, not that I’m hungry. I don’t want to be here. I want to be back in my room, alone, so I can call Leo. My mom has stuck to my side like glue all day and I haven’t been able to pick up his calls, and there have been many I have missed. I shouldn’t have walked out on him this morning. I hate myself for it.
“I’m tired, and you haven’t listened to a word I’ve said for months, why do you want me to talk now?”
“You drove home three hours after your dad and I left in tears,” she hisses, trying to keep her voice down.
The tears were for Leo.
“I’ve agreed to stay and see how I get on, you don’t need to stick around. You should go home, I promise, I’m fine now.”
She doesn’t answer me, and when our desserts arrive we eat in silence. She pays the bill when we’re done and before I climb out of the car back at the dorms, she hugs me and doesn’t let go.
“I love you so much, kid, sometimes all we need is a little push. Even if college doesn’t work out, at least you can say you tried.”
Sitting back, I smile a genuine smile for the first time all day.
“Love you, mom. Tell dad I didn’t mean to scare him this morning.”
He was not happy that I was upset and wouldn’t explain why. In the end, mom told him to go to the club and she would sort me out. I came so close to telling her about Leo, but I reckon I would be better off telling dad, mom will go crazy if I tell her I’ve lost my mind over a boy.