Page 38 of Lost and Found


  The anger I felt toward him that night returns immediately. Dick. It takes every ounce of my energy to stay on the stage, finish the set. Cocky son-of-a-bitch… if he thinks he can have my girl, he’s got another think coming.

  After the song, I thank everyone and begin to walk directly toward Emi and her dance partner, shaken and suddenly insecure. I’m stopped halfway there by Anna.

  “Nate,” she says, “thank you so much. That was beautiful.”

  “I’m glad you liked it, Anna,” I say, trying not to look too impatient.

  “It was perfect, man,” Chris says.

  “Good. Thank you.”

  “No, thank you,” he says, giving me a hug and patting me on the shoulder.

  “If you’ll excuse me,” I tell him. I can’t get to her fast enough– can’t get him away from her fast enough. As soon as I break away, she is the only person I see in the distance. She’s looking at me, smiling, obviously ready. She’s still standing next to him, but I can tell that he is nowhere in her periphery at this point.

  “Thanks for looking after her,” I mumble to him, giving him a look, making it clear that she is mine. I briskly walk up to her, caress her face with my hand, kiss her tenderly, then take her by the hand, and escort her out of the ballroom. I am suddenly thankful that she is eager to follow me. I shouldn’t have doubted her. Exiting the doors, I run my hand all the way down her back, settling it at the base of her spine.

  “That’s the guy that was taking advantage of you at that party in college, isn’t it?” I ask.

  “Was he? No, I don’t think he was taking advantage of me,” she answers as she shakes her head, pushing the “up” button once we reach the elevators.

  “No, I’m pretty sure he was.”

  “What?” she laughs.

  “Yeah,” I say. “I think I remember him.” And hopefully you don’t.

  “I’m pretty sure he wasn’t,” she says in his defense. “He was really nice. I think Chris had put him in charge of making sure I would stay out of trouble.” The elevator door opens, and we step in, joining a woman and two small children.

  “You remember that? Or is that what he told you?”

  “That’s what Chris told me…”

  “Hmm,” I say, not really interested anymore. “That’s not how I remember it. And if I recall correctly, Chris was too drunk to know what was going on.”

  “You know what he said to me tonight?” The door opens on the third floor and the woman and children leave the elevator. I grit my teeth, hoping that nothing he said or anything that occurred tonight reminds her of what really happened that night.

  “Who, that guy?” She nods. “No, what?” I pull her to me, embracing her tightly, my hands running up and down her back in an effort to keep her focus on me, on the present-day and nothing else. Her face just inches from mine, she continues to talk. I barely hear the words, concentrating on the way her lips move, how her eyes sparkle.

  “He said that he knew, from that night, the first time he ever saw you… he said he knew you were in love with me.”

  “Really?” I laugh inwardly, somewhat surprised with his revelation to Emi. I was, of course. She knows it now, but I never knew my feelings were so obvious back then to a complete stranger. After all, I had been dating someone else at the time– even if she did break up with me a week later.

  “Yeah, he said he had thought about asking me out sometime, but when he saw us together– I guess when he saw us kiss– he could just feel the chemistry or something.” She starts to pull at the knot of my necktie.

  “Kiss?” I comment, tucking her hair behind her ear. The only time we kissed that night was in the privacy of her bedroom. Of course he hadn’t seen, but it’s obvious to me now that she doesn’t remember anything. “Kiss?” I repeat with a sigh of relief, moving my lips to hers, touching them lightly. “Like this?”

  “Yes,” she whispers, distracted, her eyes closed. We kiss until the elevator stops at our floor. I hold the door open with my shoe and keep her inside, talking to her.

  “Emi, when we exit this elevator, I don’t want to talk about anything– or anyone– other than you and me. Got it?”

  She smiles and nods as I take her hand and lead her down the hallway.

  “Good. Now, do you know how incredible you look tonight?”

  “I tried,” she says, waiting for me to open the door.

  “You succeeded.”

  “I did it for you.”

  “Thank you,” I tell her, inserting the key and turning the handle as we kiss, deeper. “Are we okay?” I ask her, pulling back slightly to look into her eyes.

  She nods and smiles.

  “What does this mean? For us, I mean?” I open the door for her and again touch the small of her back, so soft and warm and I can’t take my hand off of her.

  I close the door lightly behind us and wait for her answer. She removes one shoe, and then the other, then walks up to me, standing on her tiptoes so her lips can reach mine.

  “I love you, Nate,” she says. “And we’re going to continue on just like we were before we found out I was pregnant…” She kisses me again. “And when the baby comes, we’ll raise it together…” Another kiss. “In either one household or two.”

  “My vote is for one,” I tell her seriously.

  “Well, we don’t have to make any decisions tonight, Nate,” she responds. “I hope you’re right, but let’s just take this one day at a time.”

  “Whatever you want, Emi,” I whisper to her.

  “I really want you to make love to me.” Her voice is soft, but I can still hear her wanting, her needing, in the inflection of her words.

  “Gladly,” I tell her, kissing her through my smile and picking her up, carrying her closer to the bed.

  “Okay, first thing’s first,” she says as I gently set her down. “We have to go back down to the party by midnight,” she states. “That means our clothes need to look… perfect…”

  “You’re being far too reasonable right now, Emi. There’s no way we’re going back down to that party, and you know it.” My hands travel up and down her arms.

  “We have to,” she smiles, her eyes pleading. “Everyone will know what we’re up to.”

  “I’m pretty sure the entire ballroom will know that we’re having sex soon enough.” I touch her stomach lightly. Her hands meet mine as I rub her flat stomach with my thumb. “I can’t believe our baby is in there.”

  “I know,” she whispers as I lower my lips to hers. I tug at the shoulder straps of her dress, but she stops me.

  “Not yet?” I ask. “Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine, Nate,” she says. “There’s a zipper down the side, that’s all. But I’ll let you do the honors.” She stands in front of me, lifting her arm to expose the zipper. I slowly pull it down, taking the strap off of that shoulder, exposing her left breast and the small batch of freckles.

  I mumble against her soft skin the poem I had written for all seventeen little marks. “One transcendent kiss, that later makes lovers take soft breaths, holding hands.”

  “Oh, Nate,” she whispers after I drop her arm.

  I kiss her shoulder, and carefully pull the other strap down, kissing the other shoulder. I hold the dress by both straps as it falls easily from her body.

  To my surprise, she is completely naked underneath.

  “Hello, my love,” I whisper, kissing her again, embracing her and lifting her to my height.

  “Will you hang the dress up?” she whispers back. I pull back and look at her.

  “Really?” She simply nods, her eyes shifting toward the closet. I set her down and hurry to fulfill her request.

  I rush back to her naked body, quickly becoming fully aroused. I begin to undress myself, throwing my coat on the ground. “That stays there,” I tell her. She smiles.

  “My turn,” she says. “Let me do it.”

  “Anything you want.” I stand there, ready for her hands to remove my clothes. She sta
rts with the tie, pulling it loose from around my neck and tying it in a bow around her own neck.

  “Cute,” I tell her. She removes my cufflinks next, putting them on the nightstand. Then, starting with the lowest button, she unfastens my shirt, kissing my stomach and chest with each button. She carefully pulls the shirt sleeves off my arms, and walks slowly, deliberately, to the closet to hang it up. Not able to contain myself as I watch her walk away from me, I follow her and grab her from behind, my hands gently massaging her breasts. I kiss her neck and shoulders. After she hangs up the shirt, she reaches her arms behind her to unfasten my belt and unbutton my pants. They fall to the ground, and she stands still for a second after discovering the erection under my boxers.

  “You are so beautiful.” I step out of the pants and walk her forward toward the wall.

  “Your pants,” she reminds me.

  “Fuck the pants, Em,” I tell her, having no intention of worrying about them at this point.

  She stands facing the wall, her elbows propped up against it, and spreads her legs just slightly. I continue to kiss her neck, fondle her breasts, and rub slowly against her behind.

  “Oh, god, Emi, I need you right now.”

  “Then take me,” she says, breathless, turning around quickly and pushing the boxers to the floor. I pick her up, pressing her against the wall, pushing gently until I hear that sweet gasp. It’s got to be one of the most beautiful sounds I’ve ever heard.

  “Oh, Nate,” she sighs.

  “Are you alright?” I ask as she strengthens her grasp around my neck. I pause to kiss her ear, waiting for a signal to continue.

  “You feel so good inside me,” she says. Thank God. I hold on to her hips tightly, guiding them slowly, pushing deeply. When her legs wrap tighter, she pulls me into her further, gasps again. I groan quietly. It has been far too long.

  “I want to take you to bed,” I tell her my intentions as I carry her from the wall to the king size bed. She whimpers a little as we separate so I can arrange the pillows.

  “Is this comfortable?” I ask her.

  “Yes,” she breathes desperately, “but come back to me.”

  She is still wearing my tie as a bow around her neck and I laugh at my precious New Year’s Eve present. She smiles and lifts her finger, motioning for me to come to her. I lie on top of her, untying the tie and setting it on the night stand. I angle her knees up, kissing each one of them, sliding in between them. There is that sound again. That glorious sound.

  I make sure I’m slow and gentle with her, cherishing this woman that I love. Her hands begin to pull my hair as she starts to climax.

  “Oh, right there,” she breathes. I’m careful to repeat the action. “Oh, yes, Nate, ohhh….” Once she begins, her arresting sounds push me over the edge, too, and we eventually come together. Our lips separate only when we both need a breath, but immediately find each others again after a few gasps.

  We kiss as our heart rates return to normal. She continues to moan quietly in my mouth. Eventually, I pull away to look at her glowing, rosy cheeks, her dimples pronounced by a wide grin.

  “Was that okay?” I ask, confident in her answer.

  “The best,” she laughs as her fingernails scrape my arms lightly. “I don’t ever want to take another break from this. Ever again.”

  “Me neither,” I confirm, pushing a few strands of hair out of her eyes and kissing the tip of her nose, then her cheek. “Never.”

  “God, that was sweet,” she says. “I’m sorry I pushed you away this week. I was confused and–”

  “Don’t apologize, Emi. Just… thank you for letting me back in. We’ll work this out together.” I nod and smile, and she does the same. Wanting to excite her once more, my lips begin their journey down her body. She puts her knees up again, bracing herself, and my lips, tongue bring her to ecstasy once more. Her body writhes in pleasure, her moans become yells, and it’s obvious she feels freer to express herself in a strange hotel than she does in our apartments, where neighbors can hear through the paper-thin walls (or roommates can hear through actual paper screens). She sits up suddenly, and I kneel to meet her lips, but she pushes me backwards, eyeing my erection, and crawling on top of me.

  I’ve told her that this is my favorite position because I can see her beautiful body on display… we’d made out this way many times… and it’s her favorite because gravity takes over, and it gives her the deepest pleasure. I take her by the hips and guide her body, oscillating wildly. I put my knees up to support her back and to give myself better leverage. She arches her back and grabs her ankles, her swollen breasts aching to be kissed. As soon as I feel the burn in my stomach starting, I sit up so I can take her breast into my mouth, feeling the release, the electric current leaving my body and exciting hers, over and over. We are breathing in unison now, moaning on occasion, as the release continues.

  “Oh, my god, Nate, oh, don’t stop,” she begs. I keep going, faster still, not needing to stop, surprised at my own stamina. She begins to yell again, and we continue for at least a few more minutes, until I can feel the burn lessening, myself becoming more sensitive.

  “Emily Hennigan, I love you,” I say, completely spent. “My god,” I continue, slowing to a halt, collapsing on my back. “Oh, fuck, what was that?”

  She falls to my chest, out of breath. “I don’t know,” she says. “But it was the most… amazing… oh, my god.”

  I roll on top of her quickly, never wanting our bodies to be apart. I kiss her deeply, her legs wrap around my body tightly, pulling me closer to her.

  “God, I love you, Emi,” I whisper in her ear before my head collapses on the pillow she’s lying on. I slide next to her on the bed as her body shifts with mine, one of her legs still covering me, her head resting on my chest.

  “I love you, too, Nate.” The room silent, I focus on the sound of her breathing, each breath slower, deeper. She makes the sweetest noise, a tiny sigh, as she attempts to pull herself even closer to me, gripping my arm tightly with her hand. I smooth her hair gently, breathing in the fresh smell of her shampoo. My eyes closed, my thoughts drift back over the events of the past hour or so. My smile never lessens as I recount every moment… every perfect moment with her.

  Eventually, her limbs feel heavier on my body as I assume she’s fallen asleep. I feel myself losing consciousness as well until I remember how she looked at me from across the ballroom. All of my senses were completely alert and attuned to her, as they have suddenly become again as I lie in bed with her.

  I remember undressing her, pressing her against the wall, our bodies joining together in the bed, the intense buildup and release…

  “Oh, my god,” I say out loud, unable to hold in my response to what happened between us. She jumps slightly at the sound of my voice. “I’m sorry I woke you,” I tell her, lightly brushing her arm with my hand. “But oh, my god,” I repeat.

  She laughs and lightly scratches my chest. “I know. I’ve never felt anything like that before.”

  “That makes two of us,” I tell her. “I had no idea I was capable of that.”

  “And here I am, left wondering, how I got so lucky…” she says.

  “Me, too.” I kiss her once more before getting lost in those beautiful green eyes of hers. “You’re by far the sexiest woman I’ve ever known, Emi. In the ballroom tonight, in the bedroom, in any room. You astound me. Even in my wildest fantasies, you weren’t this beautiful, this alluring. It just goes beyond anything I could ever have wished for myself.”

  “Wow,” she says, propping herself up on her elbow to lean over me. “That’s a pretty big compliment.”

  “And yet, still, I don’t think it fully expresses how I feel… how grateful I am that you’ve chosen me.”

  “Nate, please know, I feel the same about you. You’ve always been my best friend… and I had a feeling you’d be a good lover, but I didn’t know things could be like this,” she laughs as she continues to run her fingernails over my chest. “This w
as… unreal… that’s really the only thing I can say about it. Like, out-of-body-experience-unreal.”

  “Exactly,” I agree. “How do you feel now?”

  “Perfect. And exhausted. And not wanting to go back downstairs.”

  “See? Didn’t I tell you?” I joke with her.

  “I had good intentions…”

  “Well,” I tell her, “it’s still early, we don’t have to go yet. Or at all, if you really don’t want to. We’re in love. They all know. I’m not ashamed.”

  “I’m not ashamed,” she adds, “but it would be embarrassing facing the fam in the morning, you know?”

  “You’d get over it,” I tease. “Plus, you have sex hair right now… and I don’t know how to fix that, obviously.”

  “Is it bad?”

  I wipe a few beads of perspiration from her hairline. “No, it’s good,” I tell her, kissing her forehead. “You look beautiful.”

  “Thank you.” She closes her eyes, and I watch her body, touch the warm, silky skin on her stomach. She rolls back onto the bed as I lean over to kiss her navel, my lips lingering on her stomach.

  “You okay in there?” I whisper.

  “I heard that,” Emi laughs. “I did some research, and it’s fine.”

  “Just wanted to talk to our child, do you mind?” I joke.

  “Our child,” Emi sighs. “Wow.”

  “Yeah, I know.”

  “Nate, whatever happens, I know that he or she will be welcomed and loved by us and our families… and I know we’ll be able to provide for this child like no other people could. I really do hope we stay together.”

  “I really hope you’ll soon realize that we’re going to.” I kneel over her legs and encircle her hipbones with my thumbs.

  “Nate?”

  “Yes, my love?” I place my ear on her stomach, hugging her sides.

  “Let’s go back to the party.”

  “What? No, Emi, I don’t think we’re… presentable.”

  “But you said I look beautiful.”

  “In my eyes, you always do… but it looks like we’ve been doing exactly what we’ve been doing… which, in all honesty makes you look even more beautiful to me.”