With Xoayya the situation was worse because her death would be passive. By making a decision to exclude her I would be killing her. She had no way to influence what was going to happen, no way to fight against her fate, since the decision was out of her hands. By leaving her behind I would kill her.
1 realized that her grandmother had managed to make her case using her view of destiny and mine of free will. It was not hard to believe that a decision could put someone in a position where they died—that was the entire argument for free will since the chance of getting out of that same situation was present as well. Unless I wanted to reject out of hand any veracity to Clairvoyance—and doing so would have been stupid since that was one of the major concentrations of magickal study in the Empire—i had to believe Xoayya would die if she did not come along with us.
I looked up and met [asra’s steady stare. “What do you see if 1 agree to let her go with us?”
“A blizzard of images of which I can make no sense.” The old woman rested her folded hands on the table. “If you are right, there are legions of futures for her awaiting decisions she will make. If I am right, then someone wiser and more powerful than I must interpret what I have seen. I just take heart in the fact that she will live.”
“That is something.”
Jasra reached out and grabbed my right wrist. “Understand this, Lachlan, her destiny is entwined with yours. I’ve not seen you as lovers, and usually as friends, but your lives were not brought together by accident.”
I gently twisted my arm free of her hand. “I will do all I can to look after her in Chaos. You know that.”
She again reached for my hand, but held herself back. “I would tell you much about yourself—not for you, but so you could safeguard my Xoayya. I will not, however, out of respect for your wishes.”
“Thank you. I have enough to worry about that I don’t need to know futures that might not come to pass.”
She smiled. “Thirty years ago your father made the same comment to me when I offered to look into his future for him. It is good to know the son has the same strengths as the father. In this business I would rather trust in your strength than that of visions.”
19
O
ver the next four days I spent an appreciable amount of time at the palace studying the reconstruction of Chaos. 1 pored over reports and charts and journals, constantly checking what they said against other accounts and the model in the larger room. 1 worked very hard and even spent one night sleeping there as opposed to going all the way back to my grandmother’s house on a particularly snowy evening.
In working that hard on the geography of Chaos 1 half expected to see my eyes filled with Chaosfire. I got so I knew the hills and valleys better than I knew my grandfather’s farm and Stone Rapids. I found myself dreaming about grand expeditions into the land beyond the Ward Walls, and, when 1 wakened, 1 found my dreams described the terrain and conditions perfectly. In less than a week 1 felt I had learned enough about Chaos that, if forced to, 1 could navigate through it without maps and stand a good chance of coming home again.
The Emperor joined us when the affairs of state did not call for him actually to run the nation. Our discussions varied greatly, though all remained centered on the expedition to destroy the Necroleum. Once we had made our choices of people to join the mission, Thetys reviewed and approved the rosters.
“I think you and Kit have chosen wisely, though I am intrigued by your inclusion of this Xoayya in the group, Locke.”
“I know she doesn’t seem much of a likely choice, Highness, but there are a variety of reasons why I think she should come along. First and foremost she is clairvoyant, which means she can warn us of potential dangers. While I have no doubt Kit’s scouts and Tyrchon can and will spot trouble, Xoayya gives us an added edge in that area.”
The Emperor gave me a wry smile. “I am glad you have more trust in your visionary than 1 do in mine. None that I know of saw Lord Disaster’s appearance at my ball.”
“I agree, Highness, that their predictions must be used carefully, but Xoayya also has some magickal training in the area of Healing. This will clearly be a mission where there will be no lack of need for such skills.” I glanced down. “I have other reasons for wanting her along. Please don’t ask me to explain….”
Thetys frowned. “You’re not lovers, are you?”
“You think I would be taking someone I care for into Chaos?”
“No, no I don’t think that, Locke, but I had to ask.” He looked from me to Kit and back again. “This is not going to be an easy mission, so the thought of seeing to your own comfort has to have occurred to you both. 1 have heard many tales of grand expeditions into Chaos where nobles have brought mistresses and musicians, cooks and tailors with them so life might continue in some semblance of normality for them.”
Kit shook his head. “Those stories get a lot of play in the more distant Imperial outposts, Highness, though I’m not certain how true they are. Regardless, Locke has reasons for wanting Xoayya along. She wants to go, which is the important point, and having an extra person along can’t hurt.”
The Emperor frowned. “Meaning?”
Kit stiffened. “Meaning no disrespect, Highness, but it would come as no surprise to me if it was known you gave out medallions so a dozen people could be outfitted for an expedition. Having another person along who is not accounted for in those reports is a good thing. It gives us an advantage over our enemies, and for that I am very grateful.”
I nodded silent thanks to Kit. When I’d told him that Xoayya was coming along with us, he was dead set against her inclusion in the group. He pressed me hard for an explanation, and 1 gave him all the logical reasons I could think of. They didn’t satisfy him, so I finally confided that if she didn’t come along, she would die. He said that was the best reason he’d heard and agreed to have her join us.
The Emperor caught my nod, then smiled. “There are other reasons at play here—don’t bother to deny them. My father, and his father before him, never knew exactly what your fathers were planning on their trips into Chaos, but they still trusted them. This matter of trust seems to be tradition between our families, and 1 see no reason to break it.”
Four days into the effort the Emperor returned to bring Kit and me news of an attempt to run the blockade of I lie harbor. “Several small, fast boats, going out in the leeth of a storm in the middle of the night tried to get through. We sank two and others turned back, but some may have gotten through. We have to assume the Chademon is no longer in the capital.”
Kit rubbed sleep from his eyes. “Another week and we could have the site pinpointed.”
I shook my head. “1 do not believe we have that much time.” 1 hesitated, then brought up something that had been bothering me. “In all the studying we have done here, on a project you say my father started thirty or forty years ago, I have yet to see one report in his hand. Why?”
Illtyd looked to the Warlord, but the Emperor answered me. “That is my doing. I assumed, perhaps hastily and incorrectly, that you might give your father’s reports more weight than they otherwise warrant. Gam has been handling them, so the information has been available to you, but you have been spared the distraction of knowing your father produced it.”
I heard his words and had no reason to imagine he was lying to me, but I did not trust what he said completely. “I understand what you did, but I think it may have proved counterproductive, Highness.” I looked over at the Warlord. “I think my father’s accounts may hold the key to locating the Necroleum.”
Drustorn’s opalescent stare met mine openly. “How so?”
“If my father believed the Chronicles of Farscry when it said he was to slay Kothvir, and if he had heard rumors of the Necroleum, it would make sense he would want to locate it. In doing that he could make sure Kothvir would remain dead.” I pointed to the crystal in the middle of the room. “Show me where my father’s last expedition went.”
Illtyd shook his head nervous
ly. “I cannot. We have no record of that expedition because there were no survivors.”
“Then show me where my father died.”
The magicker again protested. “I do not know where that was.”
I held up my right hand and flicked the silver ring with my thumb. “Then show me where this was found, for surely…” 1 started to say the ring would not have been far from my father’s body, but I realized it could have been stolen and passed through a dozen Chademon tribes to prove he was dead.
The Emperor nodded, and Illtyd sent the magick lens whisking over the artificial landscape. It hovered over the reconstruction of an old manor house nestled within a maze of canyons. “An expedition of Chaos Riders found it here when they slit open a creature they planned to make their dinner. They found the ring in its belly. Where the rodent got it, I do not know.”
I stared at the huge quartz hexagon. “Move back to the east, yes, there, now move north, slowly.” At my request, the sorcerer sent his crystal swooping down into a valley. It started through a narrow, serpentine crack in the red rock, then had to turn sideways to work its way in deeper.
“You can stop now.” I looked over at Kit and felt a shiver run through my body. “This is where our fathers died.”
“What?” Kit stared at me, disbelieving. “You can’t know that. Their bodies were never recovered. No one survived that expedition.”
“I know that, but it doesn’t matter. I can feel it.” I pointed at the tiny crack in the rock. “This is where we will find the Necroleum and the Fistfire Sceptre.”
The sorcerer fixed me with a curious stare. “You base this judgment on a feeling?”
I twisted the ring on my finger. “That’s right. I wish hd something more solid to work on, but that’s it. The bharashadi were a menace then, a menace our fathers did all they could to eliminate. I have to assume their last and most dangerous mission would have been to ‘destroy the Necroleum, which means this area has got lo contain it.”
“There is a great deal of logic to his reasoning.” The Warlord folded his arms across his chest. “I can see this .area as the focus for my invasion of Chaos if they do not succeed in destroying the Necroleum.”
I turned from Illtyd to the Emperor. “Given that ■omeone may have run the blockade, 1 think we must head into Chaos immediately. We have to reach Castel payne and get the Staff of Emeterio before we can stop the Bharashadi. If we are lucky, in fact, the sceptre has not yet left Herakopolis. What are the chances the thief will just ship into Chaos and go overland through Chaos?”
The Warlord smiled wryly. “As much as we would like to stop the Bharashadi, the hatred borne for them by oilier Chaos demon tribes is pretty virulent. Travel through the territory of other Chaos demon tribes will not be easy for our thief. 1 would guess he will make l.andfall still within the Empire and travel on this side of the Ward Walls until he reaches the area where the black Shadows’ territory touches the walls. 1 should also note that the thief most certainly will not be traveling alone.”
“He had accomplices in the vault, so I agree with that assessment.” I walked over to the same wall chart the Warlord was looking at. “That means they would probably land here in Menal and go straight up the Wardline. If we head out immediately and make for the boundary between the Bfiarasfiadi and Tsvorlu lands, we could cut them off before they slip through. This will also put us near Gorecrag, from which we should be able to see where Castel Payne is floating.”
Kit nodded. “It is a plan.”
I smiled. “Will your people be ready to follow it by tomorrow morning?”
“All will be present and accounted for.” Kit stifled a yawn. “They have all drawn their supplies for the expedition. 1 think I will go get mine, then attempt to catch up on my sleep.” He thumped one of the gazetteers Illtyd’s people had created. “I know I will review this in my sleep.”
“I’ll go get ready, too. We will meet tomorrow, just before noon.” I clasped the Warlord’s forearm. “I hope, the next time I see you, it will be to report we will not need the army you will raise to defend the Empire.” grandfather would have chosen armor somewhat more substantial, like ring-joined plate, but the strip-scale was light and for someone as small as I am, to sacrifice any speed was a mistake. In heavier armor 1 might have been able to absorb more damage, but I thought hitting, was decidedly preferable to being hit.
I think it was part of James’s plan to have Nob Invite me to play him in a game of chess to kill the time until dinner. Nob grumbled about how he’d not have a good opponent at chess until 1 came back and said he was happy that Cruach would not be around to bother his bitches. He called me by my father’s name twice during the game, and I could easily imagIne him having similarly distracted my father before expeditions.
I very much appreciated his effort, and fully abandoned myself to it. As excited as i was about going, I could see the waiting would be excruciatingly painful if l h.ad nothing else to do. Anticipation and dread mixed together to threaten me with moody flip-flops that would have driven me crazy.
More importantly, though, I found myself reflecting upon the unspoken covenant between citizens of the Empire and those who protect them from Chaos. The vast majority of citizens could no more imagine leaving the’ womb than they could imagine committing suicide. For many of them the two things were one and the same They were content to let others shoulder the responsibility of dealing with Chaos and we were content to accept that responsibility.
In return, however, they had a duty to make our sacrifice worth it. It was up to them to see to it that the Empire was worth preserving. Their part of the bargain was, to do all the things that we found ourselves willing to fight to save. If they did not, we would find Chaos on either side of the Wardlines and have no reason to fight to save the land of our birth.
I think this is the reason the Black Churchers are seen as so perverse. They believe that men found their true potential under the influence of Chaos and, as a result, hailed Chaos Riders for what they became, even though that praise blasphemed against what Chaos Riders actually did. The fact that Black Churchers might actually work to bring Chaos back over the world again made them a group to be feared—and explained why they were outlawed and killed when found.
By telling me about his dogs and playing chess with me, Nob gave me a perfect view of normal life in the Empire. That normality was what I would give up by becoming a Chaos Rider. Despite having been weaned and raised on stories of heroes, I could envy Nob, his sons, and grandsons who had unremarkable lives. They married, they had children, and they formed the foundation of the Empire.
Without them, there would be nothing for which to fight.
We ended up playing two games, Nob and I. I nearly daydreamed myself into defeat during the first one. He’d place the movestone on my side of the board, then point it out to me when I didn’t do anything. He started setting it down a little less gently each time until he finally came close to upsetting the pieces with a miniature earthquake.
“You are just like your father, you are! I beat him because he didn’t think to concentrate on me.”
I laughed and forced myself to focus on the game. Sixteen moves later I got Nob, but that game had been much closer than most. Nob immediately demanded another game and took Chaos. He pushed his pieces through a set of motions that I supposed to be some guild defense or other. It quickly developed the center of the board, but put Nob at a disadvantage because he lived and died on Wizard forks. This strategy put Generals to great use in long diagonal pins and skewers.
1 concentrated my attack Emperor-side and overwhelmed him. 1 picked off a General by pushing Pawns forward, then bringing my Wizards up to force some exchanges. After one bad exchange, in which 1 moved pieces almost impulsively, I ended up a General to the better and cracked his defense. He saw the inevitable and, as Rose called us to dinner, tipped Fialchar on his face.
1 could only hope that would be an omen for our expedition.
Dinner was a c
urious affair. Rose had prepared a dish that included things I could not recognize and dared not ask about. I did recognize potatoes and bits of meat, but exactly which creature they came from I couldn’t be entirely certain because of the spicy red gravy covering everything. I gathered the stew had been put together out of bits and pieces of things that were meant to fortify me both physically and spiritually for the ordeal of going into Chaos. From what little Grandmother said about the food, I assumed this was traditional fare for those heading off for Chaos, but had been seldom served after my father and uncle were lost.
Rose seemed mildly distressed that Kit was not there to eat the meal, but then she decided that just meant there was more for me. 1 thanked her, ate as much as I wanted and then some, and made a mental note to get back at Kit later. It was not that it tasted particularly bad, but it just tasted different, and the texture of some parts just didn’t feel right for chewing.
Grandmother, Marija, and I were the only ones eating together, though a place had been set for Kit. Grandmother did not say much, and her palpable anxiety snuffed any conversation after only a few exchanges. I knew she was trying to be brave and to hide her fear, but she failed, and that made her sad and started us on a downward emotional spiral.
Marija wasn’t much better a dinner companion that evening, either. Her clear concern for my grandmother distracted her, but something else seemed wrong as well. She apologized several times when I asked her to pass me the salt or butter, as if she felt she should have somehow anticipated my request. She also solicited my opinions on a variety of subjects, then confessed that her thoughts in the matter paralleled my own.
After dinner my grandmother asked Marija to bring her tonic to the solar as she wanted to watch the stars for a while before going to bed. I gave her time to get up there and settled, then I went up to have a talk with her. As I stood in the doorway, Marija smiled at me, then slipped past to leave the two of us alone.
Grandmother looked incredibly small and tired in her big chair In the time 1 had spent in the capital I had never seen her look so frail and weak. The blanket hid her legs, and, if not for the flicker of her eyes watching the stars, 1 might have thought her dead. “Your father used to come here and talk with me before he went off on his adventures, you know.”