CHAPTER XIII
THE UGLY DRESS
On that very day I searched through mother's wardrobe and found apiece of brown barege. It was a harsh and by no means pretty material.I held it up to the light, and asked her what she was going to do withit.
"Nothing," she answered, "I bought it ten years ago at a sale ofremnants, and why it has stuck to me all these years is more than Ican tell."
"May I have it?" was my next query.
"Certainly," replied mother, "but you surely are not going to have adress made of that ugly thing?"
"May I have it?" I asked again.
"Yes, dear, yes."
I did not say any more with regard to the barege. I turned theconversation to indifferent matters, but when I left the room I tookit with me. I made it into a parcel and took it out. I went to alittle dressmaker in a street near by. I asked her if she would makethe ugly brown barege into an evening dress. She measured thematerial, and said it was somewhat scanty.
"That does not matter," I said, "I _want_ an ugly dress--can youmanage to make a really ugly dress for me out of it?"
"Well, Miss Wickham," she replied, fixing her pale brown eyes on myface, "I never do go in for making ugly dresses, it would be againstmy profession. You don't mean it, do you, Miss Wickham?"
"Put your best work into it," I said, suddenly changing my tone. "Makeit according to your own ideas of the fashion. Picture a young girlgoing to a play, or a ball, in that dress, and make it according toyour own ideas."
"May I trim it with golden yellow chiffon and turquoise blue silkbows?" she asked eagerly, her eyes shining.
"You may," I replied, suppressing an internal shudder. I gave her afew further directions; she named a day when I should come to befitted, and I went home.
In less than a week's time the brown barege arrived back, ready for meto wear. It was made according to Annie Starr's ideas of a fashionableevening gown. It was the sort of garment which would have sent theDuchess or Lady Thesiger into fits on the spot. In the first place,the bodice was full of wrinkles, it was too wide in the waist, and toonarrow across the chest, but this was a small matter to complain of.It was the irritating air of vulgarity all over the dress which was sohard to bear. But, notwithstanding all these defects, it pleased me.It would, I hoped, answer my purpose, and succeed in making me appearvery unattractive in the eyes of Mr. Randolph.
That evening I put on the brown barege for dinner. The yellow chiffonand the turquoise blue bows were much in evidence, and I did reallyfeel that I was a martyr when I went downstairs in that dress with its_outre_ trimmings.
When I entered the drawing-room, mother glanced up at me as if she didnot know me; she then started, the colour came into her face, and shemotioned me imperatively to her side.
"Go upstairs at once and take that off," she said.
"Oh no, mother," I answered, "there is no time now, besides I--I choseit, I admire it."
"Take it off immediately, Westenra."
"But it is your dear barege that you have kept for ten years," I said,trying to be playful; "I must wear it, at least to-night."
I knew that I had never looked worse, and I quite gloried in the fact.I saw Mr. Randolph from his seat near mother glance at me severaltimes in a puzzled way, and Mr. Fanning, after one or two astonishedglances, during which he took in the _tout ensemble_ of the ugly robe,began to enter into a playful bear-like flirtation with MissArmstrong. Dear brown barege, what service it was doing me! I secretlydetermined that it should be my dinner dress every evening until itwore itself to rags. When the turquoise blue bows became too shabby,I might substitute them for magenta ones. I felt that I had suddenlyfound an opening out of my difficulty. If I ceased to appearattractive, Mr. Randolph and Mr. Fanning would cease to worry me, therest of the boarders would accept me for what I was, and my Gordianknot would be cut. Little did I guess! It was by no means so easy tocarry out my fixed determination as I had hoped. In the first place,poor darling mother nearly fretted herself into an illness on accountof my evening dress. She absolutely cried when she saw me in it, andsaid that if I was determined to deteriorate in that way, she wouldgive up the boarding-house and go to the cottage in the countrywithout a moment's hesitation. After wearing the dress for three orfour days I was forced, very much against my will, to put on one of mypretty black dresses, and the barege made by Annie Starr resumed itsplace in my wardrobe. I determined to wear it now and then,however--it had already done me good service. I began to hope thatneither Mr. Randolph nor Mr. Fanning thought me worth looking at whenI appeared in it.
On this evening, as I was dressing for dinner, I heard a wonderfulbumping going on in the stairs. It was the noise made by very heavytrunks, trunks so large that they seemed scarcely able to be broughtupstairs. They were arriving at the attics, too--they were enteringthe attic next to mine. Now that special attic had up to the presentremained untenanted. It was the most disagreeable room in the house.Most of the attics were quite excellent, but this room had a decidedlysloping roof, and rather small windows, and the paper on the walls wasugly, and the accommodation scanty, and what those huge boxes weregoing to do there was more than I could tell. The boxes, however,entered that special attic, and then a bodily presence followed thembriskly, a loud hearty voice was heard to speak. It said in cheerfultones--
"Thank you, that will do nicely. A large can of hot water, please, anda couple more candles. Thanks. What hour did you say the companydined?"
The reply was made in a low tone which I could not catch, and theattic door was shut.
I was down in the drawing-room in my black dress--(how comfortable Ifelt in it, how hateful that brown barege was, after all)--when thedoor was opened, and a large, stoutly-made woman, most richly dressed,came in. She had a quantity of grizzly grey hair, which was turnedback from her expansive forehead; a cap of almost every colour in therainbow bedizened her head, she wore diamond pendants in her ears, andhad a flashing diamond brooch fastening the front of her dress. Hercomplexion was high, she had a broad mouth and a constant smile. Shewalked straight up to Jane Mullins.
"Well," she said, "here I am. I have not unpacked my big trunk, asyour servant said there was very little time before dinner. Please canyou tell me when Albert will be in?"
"Mr. Fanning generally comes home about now," I heard Jane say. "Mrs.Fanning, may I introduce you to my dear young friend, MissWickham--Mrs. Wickham has not yet appeared."
To my horror I saw Miss Mullins advancing across the drawing-room,accompanied by the stout woman; they approached to my side.
"May I introduce Mrs. Fanning," said Miss Mullins--"Mr. Fanning'smother."
"The mother of dear, godly Albert," said the stout lady. "I am proudto say I am the mother of one of the best of sons. I am right pleasedto meet you, Miss Wickham. I may as well say at once that AlbertFanning, my dear and only son, has mentioned your name to me, and withan approval which would make your young cheeks blush. Yes, I am thelast person to encourage vanity in the young, but I must repeat thatif you knew all that Albert has said, you would feel that flutter ofthe heart which only joy brings forth. Now, shall we both sit in acosy corner and enjoy ourselves, and talk about Albert until dinner isready?"
This treat was certainly not likely to cause my young cheeks to blush.On the contrary, I felt myself turning pale, and I looked round with adesperate intention of flying to Jane for protection, when the stoutlady took one of my hands.
"Ah," she said, "quite up to date, a slim young hand, and a slim youngfigure, and a slim young face, too, for that matter. All that Albertsays is true, you are a _very_ nice-looking girl. I should not saythat you had much durance in you, that remains to be proved. But come,here's a cosy corner, I have a great deal to say."
That hand of Mrs. Fanning's had a wonderfully clinging effect; itseemed to encircle my fingers something like an octopus, and shepulled me gently towards the corner she had in view, and presently hadpinned me there, seating herself well in front of me, so that therewas no possible
escape.
The rest of the boarders now entered the drawing-room. Mother amongstothers made her appearance; she went to her accustomed corner, glancedat me, saw that I was in one of my black dresses, nodded approval,concluding in her dear mind that I had probably met some old friend inthe extraordinary person who was shutting me into the corner, and tookno further notice.
Captain and Mrs. Furlong were well pleased to see that I was onlytalking to a woman, it did not matter at all to them who that womanwas. And as to me I sat perfectly silent while Mrs. Fanning discoursedon Albert. She never for a single moment, I will say for her, turnedthe conversation into another channel. Albert was her theme, and shestuck to him with the pertinacity which would have done any leader ofa debate credit. The debate was Albert. She intended before dinner wasannounced to give me a true insight into that remarkable man's mostremarkable character.
"Yes," she said, "what Albert thinks is always to the point. Since achild he never gave me what you would call a real heartache.Determined, self-willed he is; you look, the next time you see him, athis chin, you observe the cleft in the middle; there never was a chinlike that yet without a mind according--a mind, so to speak, set onthe duty ahead of it--a mind that is determined to conquer. That isAlbert, that is my only, godly son. You observe, when you have anopportunity, Albert's eyes. Did you ever see anything more open thanthe way they look at you? He don't mind whether it hurts your feelingsor not; if he wants to look at you, look he will."
When she said this I nodded my head emphatically, for I had found thismost disagreeable trait in Albert's eyes from the first moment I hadbeen unfortunate enough to make his acquaintance. But Mrs. Fanningtook my nod in high good humour.
"Ah, you have observed it," she said, "and no wonder, no wonder. Now,when you get an opportunity, do pull him to pieces, feature byfeature; notice his brow, how lofty it is; there's talent there, andt'aint what you would call a fly-away talent, such as those arttalents that make me quite sick. He has no talent, thank Heaven, forpainting or for poetry, or for any fal-lal of that kind, his talentlies in a sound business direction. Oh, he has made me roar, the wayhe talks of young authors and young artists, how they come to him withtheir wares, and how he beats them down. It's in Albert's brow wherehis talent for business lies. You mark his nose too, it's somewhatlong and a little pointed, but it's the nose of a man who will makehis mark; yes, he'll make his mark some day, and I have told him soover and over."
Having gone through all Albert's features, she next proceeded todescribe Albert's character, and then went on to Albert's future. Fromthis it was an easy step to Albert's wife, and Albert's wife took up agreat deal of the good woman's attention.
"It is because I am thinking he'll soon be falling into the snares ofmatrimony that I have come to stay at 17 Graham Square," continuedMrs. Fanning. "And it's because I want my dear and godly son to get awife who will be on the pattern of Solomon's virtuous woman that Ihave given up my home and broken up my establishment and come here.Now, Miss Wickham, my dear young lady, did you or did you not hear thenoise of my boxes being brought upstairs?"
"I certainly did," I replied.
"Then you happen to occupy the bedroom next to mine?"
"I do," I said.
"That is very nice indeed, for often of an evening we will keep eachother company and discourse on Albert, to the joy of both our hearts.The boxes are receptacles for my household gods, dear, those dearmementoes of the past, that I could not quite part with. Don't supposefor a moment that they are full of dresses, for although my taste islight and festive, Albert likes gay colours, he says they remind himof the sales of remnants in the autumn. Dear fellow, it was the mostpoetical thing he ever uttered, but he has said it once or twice. Ican show you my household treasures when you feel disposed to have anevening's real recreation. The burden of this house, and with sodelicate a mother as your good Ma, must be heavy upon a young lasslike you, but Albert tells me--but there! I won't say any more justnow, for you'll blush, and I don't want you to blush, and I don't wantto encourage those hopes that may never be realised. I may as wellwhisper, though, that Albert is looking out for a wife who will be apattern of Solomon's virtuous woman, and when he finds her, why she'llbe lucky, that's all I can say."
Just then the pretty silver gong sounded, and people began to stand uppreparatory to going down to dinner. It was difficult even then tomove Mrs. Fanning, and for a wild moment I had a fear that I might beimprisoned behind her in the drawing-room all during dinner, while shestill discoursed upon Albert and his attractions. Miss Mullins,however, came to the rescue.
"Come, Miss Wickham," she cried, "we must lead the way," andaccordingly Jane, my mother, and I went down first, and the differentboarders followed us.
To my infinite distress Mrs. Fanning, being a complete stranger, hadher seat next mine. I had one comfort, however, she was better thanAlbert; and Albert, who arrived presently himself, found that he wasseated next Miss Armstrong. He nodded across at his mother.
"How do, old lady," he said, "glad to find you cosily established;everything all right, eh?"
"Yes, Albert, my son," replied the good woman, "everything is allright, and I have been having a long conversation about you with myinteresting young friend here, Miss Westenra Wickham. By-the-by, dear,would you kindly tell me how you got that outlandish name, I neverheard it before, and I do not believe it belongs to the Christianreligion."
"I did not know there was anything heathenish about it," I could nothelp answering; "it happens to be my name, and I was fully baptized byit."
"I will see presently whether I can take to it," responded the oldlady. "Soup? Yes, please. I will trouble you, my good girl, for(turning to the maid) a table-spoon; I never take soup with a dessertspoon. Thanks; that's better."
Mrs. Fanning now gave me a few moments peace, and I found, to my greatsatisfaction, that she had an excellent appetite, and was alsoextremely critical with regard to her food. I introduced her to hernext door neighbour, who happened to be a fat little woman, somethinglike herself in build. They were both gourmands, and criticisedadversely the meal to their mutual pleasure. Thus I had time to lookaround me, and to consider this new aspect of affairs. Things werescarcely likely to be more comfortable if Albert had now got hismother to plead his cause with me. He glanced at me several timesduring the meal, and once even favoured me with a broad wink--he wasreally intolerable.
Meanwhile Miss Armstrong was all blushes and smirks. I heard hersuggest to Mr. Fanning that she should go the next day to see him, andbring some of her drawings with her, and I heard him tell her in whathe was pleased to call his brutal manner that he would not be at home,and if he were and she came would certainly not see her. This seemedto be considered a tremendous joke by Miss Armstrong, and her motheralso joined in it, and gave Mr. Fanning a dig in the ribs, and toldhim that he was the soul of wit, and had the true spirit of heart.
Meanwhile, Mr. Randolph, my mother, Captain and Mrs. Furlong, and themore refined portion of the establishment enjoyed themselves at theother end of the table. I saw Mr. Randolph glance down in my directiononce or twice, and I am sure, although he was not able to judge of thedifference, the fact of seeing me once more in my properly made blackevening dress relieved his mind, for he looked quite contented, andturned in a cheerful manner to my mother, and when dinner was over,and we returned to the drawing-room, I was lucky enough to be able toescape Mrs. Fanning and to go up to the other end of the room, where Iseated myself close to mother, took hold of her hand, leant againsther chair, and indulged in the luxury of talking to Mr. Randolph. Hewas in a very good humour, and suggested that we should make a partyon the following evening to another play, which was then very much invogue.
"But not in the chocolate-coloured brougham with the pair of horses,"I said.
"We will have a cab from the nearest stand, if you prefer it," was hisinstant response.
"I should much," I answered.
"And we will not dine at the Cecil," he continued; "we ca
n have a sortof high tea here before we start."
"That I should also like infinitely better," I answered.
"It shall be as you please," was his response. Then he began to tellus something of the play which we were about to see, and I forgot allabout my discomforts, and enjoyed myself well.
I was putting things in order in the drawing-room that night, for thiswas always one of my special duties, when Mr. Fanning, who had leftthe room a long time ago, came back. He came up to me holding hislighted candle in his hand. I started when I saw him.
"Good night," I said coldly.
"Pray don't go for a moment," he said. "I have come back here on theexpress chance of seeing you."
"I cannot wait now, Mr. Fanning," I replied.
"But I really must have an interview with you, it is of the highestimportance,--when can I see you alone? When can you give me an hour ofyour time quite undisturbed?"
"Never," I answered brusquely.
"Now you will forgive me for saying that that is pure nonsense. If youwill not promise me an hour of your own free will I shall take thepresent opportunity of speaking to you."
"But I shall not stay," I answered with spirit, "and you cannot keepme here against my will. Mr. Fanning, I also will take the presentopportunity of telling you that you and I have nothing in common, thatI dislike your singling me out for special conversations of any kind,and that I hope in the future you will clearly understand that I donot wish you to do so."
"Oh, that is all very fine," he said, "but come now; what have I doneto make myself obnoxious? There is the old lady upstairs, she hastaken no end of a fancy to you, she says you are the most charming andthe prettiest girl she has ever seen, and what have you to say againstmy mother? Let me tell you that she has come to this house on purposeto make your acquaintance."
"I have nothing whatever to say against your mother, Mr. Fanning, butI object to the subject of conversation which she chooses to occupyher time with while talking to me. I am not in the least interested inyou, and I wish you and your mother clearly to understand this fact asquickly as possible."
I do not think it was in the nature of Mr. Fanning ever to lookcrestfallen, or my present speech might have made him do so. He didnot even change colour, but he looked at me out of those eyes whichhis mother had so vividly described, and after a moment said softly--
"There will come a day when you will regret this. An honest heart isoffered to you and you trample it in the dust, but there will come aday when you will be sorry. How do you think this establishment isworking?"
I was so astonished and relieved at his change of conversation that Isaid--
"It seems to be going very well, don't you think so?"
"It is going well for my purpose," he replied, and then he added, "itis working itself out in a way that will only spell one word--RUIN.Now you ponder on that. Take it as your night-cap, and see what sortof sleep you'll have, and when next I ask for a few moments'conversation perhaps you'll not say no. I will not keep you any longerfor the present."
He left the room, I heard his footsteps dying down the corridor, andthe next instant he had slammed his bedroom door.