CHAPTER VI
A QUAKER TEA
"Richard Morton," said Mrs. Yocomb genially, "thee seems listening veryintently to something Emily Warren is saying, so thee may take thatseat beside her."
"Richard Morton," said Mr. Yocomb from the head of the table, "has theemade the acquaintance of Emily Warren?"
"No, sir, but I am making it."
"So am I, and she has been here a week."
"I should esteem that one of the highest of compliments," I said; thenturning to her, I added, in an aside, "You found me out in half anhour."
"Am I such a sphinx?" she asked Mr. Yocomb with a smile; while to meshe said, in a low tone: "You are mistaken. You have had something tosay to me almost daily for a year or more."
"I am not acquainted with the article, and so can't give an opinion,"Mr. Yocomb replied, with a humorous twinkle in his eye. "If theresemblance is close, so much the better for the sphinxes."
"Now, father, thee isn't a young man that thee should be complimentingthe girls," his wife remarked.
"I've persuaded Silas Jones to stay," said Adah, entering.
"Silas Jones, I hope thee and thy parents are well," Mrs. Yocombanswered, with a courtesy somewhat constrained. "Will thee take thatseat by Adah? Let me make thee acquainted with Richard Morton and EmilyWarren."
We bowed, but I turned instantly to Miss Warren and said.
"Do you note how delightfully Mrs. Yocomb unites our names? I take itas an omen that we may become friends in spite of my shortcomings. Youshould have been named first in the order of merit."
"Mrs. Yocomb rarely makes mistakes," she replied.
"That confirms my omen."
"Omens are often ominous."
"I'm prepared for the best."
"Hush!" and she bowed her head in the grace customary before meals inthis house.
I had noted that Mr. Yocomb's bow to Mr. Jones was slightly formalalso. Remembering the hospitable traits of my host and hostess, Iconcluded that the young man was not exactly to their taste. Indeed, acertain jauntiness in dress that verged toward flashiness would notnaturally predispose them in his favor. But Adah, although disclaimingany special interest in him, seemed pleased with his attentions. Shewas not so absorbed, however, but that she had an eye for me, andexpected my homage also. She apparently felt that she had made a veryfavorable impression on me, and that we were congenial spirits. Duringthe half hour that followed I felt rather than saw that this factamused Miss Warren exceedingly.
For a few moments we sat in silence, but I fear my grace was asgraceless as my morning worship had been. Miss Warren's manner wasreverent. Were her thoughts also wandering? and whither? She certainlyheld mine, and by a constraint that was not unwelcome.
When she lifted her expressive eyes I concluded that she had donebetter than merely comply with a religious custom.
"The spirit of this home has infected you," I said.
"It might be well for you also to catch the infection."
"I know it would be well for me, and wish to expose myself to it to theutmost. You are the only obstacle I fear."
"I?"
"Yes. I will explain after supper."
"To explain that you have good cause to ask for time,"
"Richard Morton, does thee like much sugar in thy tea?" Mrs. Yocombasked.
"No-yes, none at all, if you please."
My hostess looked at me a little blankly, and Adah and Silas Jonesgiggled.
"A glass of milk will help us both out of our dilemma," I said, with alaugh.
"An editor should be able to think of two things at once," Miss Warrenremarked, in a low aside.
"That depends on the subject of his thoughts. But don't breathe thatword here, or I'm undone."
"Richard Morton," said Mr. Yocomb, "I hope thee feels the better formother's ministrations since we came home. Will thee pass thy plate forsome more of the same kind?"
"Mrs. Yocomb has done me good ever since I followed her into themeeting-house," I replied. "I am indeed the better for her dinner, andI ought to be. I feared you would all be aghast at the havoc I made.But it is your kindness and hospitality that have done me the mostgood, I would not have believed yesterday afternoon that my fortunescould have taken so favorable a turn."
"Why, what was the matter with you then?" asked Adah, with wide-eyedcuriosity; and little Zillah looked at me with a pitying and puzzledglance.
"A common complaint in the city. I was committing suicide, andyesterday became conscious of the fact."
"Mr. Morton must have hit on an agreeable method of suicide, since hecould commit it unconsciously," Miss Warren remarked mischievously. "Iread in Emily Warren's newspaper this afternoon," said Silas Jones,with awkward malice, "of a young fellow who got a girl to marry him bypretending to commit suicide. He didn't hurt himself much though."
The incident amused Adah exceedingly, and I saw that Miss Warren's eyeswere full of laughter. Assuming a shocked expression, I said:
"I am surprised that Miss Warren takes a paper so full of insidiousevil." Then, with the deepest gravity, I remarked to Silas Jones, "Ihave recently been informed, sir, on good authority, that each oneinstinctively finds and reads in a newspaper that which he likes orneeds. I sincerely hope, my dear sir, that the example you have quotedwill not lead you to adopt a like method."
Adah laughed openly to her suitor's confusion, and the mouths of theothers were twitching. With the complexion of the rose at hisbutton-hole Mr. Jones said, a trifle vindictively:
"I thought the paragraph might refer to you, sir, you seem so slightlyhurt."
"I don't like to contradict you, but I cannot be this ingenious youthwhose matrimonial enterprise so deeply interests you, since I am notmarried, and I was hurt severely."
"Thee had been overworking," said Mrs. Yocomb kindly.
"Working foolishly rather. I thought I had broken down, but sleep andyour kindness have so revived me that I scarcely know myself. Are youaccustomed to take in tramps from New York?"
"That depends somewhat upon the tramps. I think the right leadings aregiven us."
"If good leadings constitute a Friend, I am one to-day, for I have beenled to your home." "Now I'm moved to preach a little," said Mr. Yocomb."Richard Morton, does thee realize the sin and folly of overwork? Ifthee works for thyself it is folly. If thee toils for the good of theworld, and art able to do the world any good, it is sin; if there areloved ones dependent on thee, thee may do them a wrong for which thereis no remedy. Thee looks to me like a man who has been over-doing."
"Unfortunately there is no one dependent on me, and I fear I have nothad the world's welfare very greatly at heart. I have learned that Iwas becoming my own worst enemy, and so must plead guilty of folly."
"Well, thee doesn't look as if thee had sinned away thy day of graceyet. If thee'll take roast-beef and common-sense as thy medicine,thee'll see my years and vigor."
"Richard Morton," said his wife, with a gentle gravity, "never let anyone make thee believe that thee has sinned away thy day of grace."
"Mother, thee's very weak on the 'terrors of the law.' Thee's alwaysfor coaxing the transgressors out of the broad road. Thee'slatitudinarian; now!"
"And thee's a little queer, father."
"Emily Warren, am I queer?"
"You are very sound and sensible in your advice to Mr. Morton," shereplied. "One may very easily sin against life and health beyond thepoint of remedy. I should judge from Mr. Morton's words that he is indanger."
"Now, mother, thee sees that Emily Warren believes in the terrors ofthe law."
"Thee wouldn't be a very good one at enforcing them, Emily," said Mrs.Yocomb, nodding her head smilingly toward her favorite.
"The trouble is," said Miss Warren a little sadly, "that some lawsenforce themselves. I know of so many worn-out people in New York, bothmen and women, that I wish that Mr. Yocomb's words were printed at thehead of ail our leading newspapers."
"Yes," said Mr. Yocomb, "if editors and newspaper w
riters were only aseager to quiet the people as they are to keep up the hubbub of theworld, they might make their calling a useful one. It almost takes awaymy breath to read some of our great journals."
"Do you not think laziness the one pre-eminent vice of the world?"tasked.
"Not of native-born Americans. I think restlessness, nervous activity,is the vice of our age. I am out of the whirl, and can see it all themore clearly. Thee admits that thy city life was killing thee--I knowit would kill me in a month."
"I would like to have a chance to be killed by it," said Adah, with asigh.
"Thy absence would be fatal to some in the country," I heard SilasJones remark, and with a look designed to be very reproachful.
"Don't tell me that. Melissa Bunting would soon console thee."
"Thee stands city life quite well, Emily," said Mrs. Yocomb.
"Yes, better than I once did. I am learning how to live there and stillenjoy a little of your quiet; but were it not for my long summers inthe country I fear it would go hard with me also."
"You have suggested my remedy," I said. "My business does not permitmuch chance for rest, unless it is taken resolutely; and, like manyother sinners, I have great reforms in contemplation."
"It must be a dreadful business that came so near killing you," Adahremarked, looking at me curiously. "What can it be?"
Mrs. Yocomb glanced at her daughter reprovingly, but Miss Warren's eyeswere dancing, and I saw she was enjoying my rather blank look immensely.
T decided, however, that honesty and audacity would be my best allies,and at the same time I hoped to punish Adah a little through hercuriosity.
"I must admit that it is a dreadful business. Deeds of darkness occupymuch of my time; and when good, honest men, like your father, areasleep, my brain, and hand are busiest. Now you see what a suspiciouscharacter your father and mother have harbored in their unquestioninghospitality."
The young lady looked at me with a thoroughly perplexed and halfalarmed expression.
"My gracious!" she exclaimed. "What do you do?"
"You do not look as if 'inclined to mercy,'" I replied. "Mr. Yocomb andMiss Warren believe in the terrors of the law, so I have decided tomake a full confession to Mrs. Yocomb after supper. I think that I amone of the 'transgressors' that she could 'coax.'"
After a momentary and puzzled glance at my laughing critic, Mrs. Yocombsaid:
"Emily Warren knows thy secret."
"So you have told Emily Warren, but will not tell us," Adah complained,in a piqued tone and manner.
"Indeed, you are mistaken. Miss Warren found me out by intuition. I amlearning that there is no occasion to tell her things: she sees them."
Mr. Yocomb's face wore a decidedly puzzled look, and contained also thesuggestion of an apt guess.
"Well," he said, "thee has shown the shrewdness of an editor, and aYankee one at that."
Miss Warren now laughed outright.
"Thee thinks," he continued, "that if thee gets mother on thy sidethee's safe. I guess I'll adopt a common editorial policy, and sitsafely on the fence till I hear what mother says to thy confession."
"Are you laughing at me?" I asked Miss Warren, with an injured air.
"To think that one of your calling should have got into such adilemma!" she said, in a low tone. "It's delicious!"
"My cheeks may become bronzed, but never brazen, Miss Warren. Myguilelessness should touch your sympathies."
"Well," said Adah, with rather a spiteful look at Miss Warren, "I'mglad I've not got a prying disposition. I talked with you half theafternoon and did not find you out."
Even Mrs. Yocomb laughed at this.
"Now, Miss Warren," I said, turning to her with a triumphant look, "Ihope you feel properly quenched."
"Is there any record of your crime, or misfortune, or whatever it maybe, in Miss Warren's newspaper?" asked Silas Jones, with a slight sneer.
"Yes, sir, of both, if the truth must be told," I replied. "That is theway she found me out."
This unexpected admission increased the perplexity all around, and alsoadded to Miss Warren's merriment.
"Where is the paper?" said Adah, quickly.
At this peculiar proof of his daughter's indifference Mr. Yocomb fairlyexploded with laughter. He seemingly shared his wife's confidence inMiss Warren to that degree that the young lady's knowledge of mybusiness, combined with her manner, was a guarantee against anythingseriously wrong. Moreover, the young girl's laugh was singularlycontagious. Its spontaneity and heartiness were irresistible, and Ifeared that her singing would not be half so musical.
"Richard Morton," said Mrs. Yocomb, rising, "if thee wishes to free thymind, or conscience, or heart, I will now give thee an opportunity."
"My fate is in your hands. If you send me back to my old life and workI will go at once."
"Ah!" exclaimed Miss Warren, in mock gravity, "now there is a touch oftragedy in your words. Must we all hold our breaths till you return,absolved or condemned?"
"And were I condemned would you breathe freely?"
"Yes, indeed I would, if Mrs. Yocomb condemned you. But after my senseof justice was satisfied I might be moved to pity."
"And you think I may become a pitiable object?"
"You would be, indeed, if Mrs. Yocomb condemned you."
"Lead on," I exclaimed, with a gesture of mock tragedy; "this is thehour of destiny."