Or Marta.
He opened his hands and shook them by his sides.
It’ll be all right, he told himself. She just doesn’t get it.
What makes you think she’ll ever get it?
‘Who cares?’ he muttered.
Let her think what she wants. If she isn’t gonna listen to the truth, anyway, the hell with her.
He turned away from the telephone and started walking back through the casino. He’d been away from Sue too long.
What’ll she think? he wondered. Maybe she’ll figure I’ve been in the back room boffing the desk clerk.
Women!
Never should’ve told Marta about her. That was the big mistake. Trusting her to understand.
Just because she’d been okay about Elise . . .
Who says she was okay about Elise?
Maybe that had been an act.
Besides, by the time I made that bonehead confession about falling for Elise, she was dead. Hardly in any position to steal me away from Marta.
Whereas Sue is alive and well and a threat.
Striding across the hotel’s parking lot, he could see her through the rear window of his car. She seemed to be slumped sideways against the passenger door.
Neal went to the opposite side. As he climbed in behind the steering wheel, she sat up. She looked at him. Though she smiled, her eyes were wet and red, and she had tear streaks down both sides of her face.
‘So,’ she said, ‘we all set?’ She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. ‘Ya git us a room?’
He stared at her.
He knew why she’d been crying.
Shaking his head, he muttered, ‘Great. Terrific.’
‘Huh?’
‘You were in me, weren’t you?’ he asked. ‘The whole time.’
Twenty-Nine
Without being asked, Sue slipped the bracelet off her wrist and gave it back to Neal. ‘I’m awful sorry,’ she said.
‘How could you do that to me?’
She lowered her head. ‘I’m a shit.’
‘You’re damn right you’re a shit! I trusted you!’
‘I know.’
‘Damn it!’
‘I aimed to lie and let on I’d gone off in someone else, but then . . . I ain’t never lied to ya, Neal. Didn’t seem like a good time to start, right after ya got yerself in such a jam by tellin the truth to Marta.’
Recalling things he’d said about Sue, he felt a sickening rush of shame. ‘It wasn’t all the truth,’ he told her.
‘Ya mean like how I’m a teenage lame-brain gum-chompin hillbelly?’
He grimaced. ‘I was . . . exaggerating.’
Sue raised her head and gave him a crooked smile. ‘I know that, pal. I was in yer head, remember? In the resta ya, too. I got me a purty good notion exactly what ya thinka me. How ya feel ’bout me, too.’
‘You think so?’
‘I know so.’ With that, she clapped him on the thigh. ‘C’mon, let’s get up to the room.’
Sue had only her paper sack for luggage, so she helped Neal by carrying his overnight bag while he hurried along with his suitcase.
He knew that he ought to be furious with her. Bad enough that she’d snuck into him with the bracelet, but she hadn’t gotten out when he told her to.
Knew everything . . .
But it was hard to be furious with someone, knowing that she was aware of all those terrible things he’d said about her.
Especially when she’d seen beyond the words and recognized the truth: that he hadn’t really meant them, that he’d said them to mislead Marta about his true feelings for her.
They must’ve hurt her, anyway.
She’d been in tears.
In his own limited experiences with the bracelet, Neal had discovered that his body had reacted in certain ways, even though abandoned – apparently responding to things that happened on the ‘ride.’ He’d returned to find it sweaty, breathless, agitated . . . even aroused.
What had he thought, or said, to make Sue cry?
The insults? Something else?
Ask her?
Maybe some other time.
Following him through the dim and smoky casino, Sue said, ‘There’s that nudie gal.’
He glanced at the painted panel near the end of the bar, and blushed.
‘She looks sorta lumpy to me.’
‘Yeah,’ he said, and wished she would drop the subject.
‘She ain’t gotta you-know-what, either.’ Sue flashed a grin at him. ‘But I reckon ya already noticed.’
‘Very funny.’
The elevator was just beyond the pay phones. Sue pushed the button. As they waited for the elevator to arrive, she said, ‘Hasn’t.’
‘Hasn’t what?’
‘Hasn’t gotta you-know-what.’
The doors slid open. They stepped inside. As the doors shut, Sue said, ‘It’s room four-twenty?’ She hadn’t yet seen either of the keys; she apparently knew the room number because she’d been in Neal at the front desk.
‘Yeah,’ he said.
She set her bags on the floor and pushed the button for the fourth floor. The elevator started upward.
‘Hey, look at us!’ she blurted.
Looking around, Neal realized there were mirrors on three sides of the elevator, and on its ceiling. The glass was flecked with gold. ‘Fancy,’ he said.
In the mirror to his left, he gazed at the reflection of Sue standing beside him. She was leaning forward slightly, studying the same images, a look of amused curiosity on her face.
They could not only see themselves in the mirror, but also its reflection of the mirror to their right, which showed them and the mirror to their left, which showed them again and . . .
‘We just keep on goin and goin,’ Sue whispered.
Neal saw her frown at herself, saw the back of her head with its thick blond ponytail, then her frowning face deeper in the mirror, then her ponytail again, then her frown again, still smaller and farther away. ‘S’pose we go on back like that forever?’ Sue asked.
‘More than likely,’ Neal said.
She laughed and bumped her shoulder against him, and Sues bumped Neals deep into the mirrors.
The elevator stopped and its doors slowly slid open. Neal and Sue picked up their bags and stepped out. The corridor was deserted.
Sue hurried on ahead of him. When she found the door to their room, she leaned back against the wall and crossed her ankles. ‘Ya gonna take all day?’ she asked.
‘What’s the big hurry?’
‘Wanta see what we got.’
In front of the door, Neal set down his suitcase. He dug into a pocket and took out the two keys. ‘You want one?’ he asked.
‘Sure,’ she said. Her hands were full. She bared her teeth and clicked them together.
‘I’m not putting a key in your mouth. It’s probably filthy.’
‘My mouth or the key?’
‘I was speaking of the key, but . . .’
‘Well, good. I try and not swear any more than I have to.’ She grinned. ‘Ya gonna let us in, or ain’t ya? Aren’t you.’
Neal looked at her, amazed. So that’s what she’d meant by the ‘hasn’t’ downstairs: she’d been correcting herself. Unlocking the door, he said, ‘You don’t need to improve your language on my account.’
‘Well, it . . . isn’t exactly flattering to go around and get yerself called an ignerunt twerp.’
‘I just said it so Marta wouldn’t . . . I didn’t mean it. You know that. You were in me.’
‘Well, ya meant it, all right. Only thing is, ya still like me anyhow. Spite-a how . . . in spite of the way I talk like a dope.’
‘You’re fine the way you are,’ he said, and opened the door.
Sue stepped into the room. ‘Look at this!’
Neal scanned the room. He’d been in plenty of motel rooms, and the rooms of several good hotels. Never in one this large, though. And never in one this old-fashioned. The wallpaper, th
e paintings, the dresser, the lamps and chairs, the rugs spread here and there on the dark and glossy hardwood floor – all looked like real antiques. Even the four-poster beds looked as if they might’ve been around in the days of the Gold Rush.
Sue dropped her bags onto the smaller of the two beds, then hurried into the bathroom. Standing in the doorway, she said, ‘Get a loada this.’ She sounded more wary than impressed.
Neal put down his suitcase and joined her.
‘What’n tar is that?’ Sue asked, nodding at the toilet.
The white porcelain water tank was up near the ceiling above the toilet, not down behind the seat. A chain with a wooden handle dangled from the bottom of the tank.
‘I guess they wanted to keep things authentic,’ Neal said.
‘Ya think it works?’
‘I imagine. There’d probably be a mess if it didn’t.’
Sue nudged him with her elbow.
‘Besides,’ he said, ‘it looks like new piping.’
‘Hmm.’ She wandered past the sink and mirror, past a full-length wall mirror that was flecked with gold like those in the elevator, and halted near the side of the tub.
The large, claw-footed boat of a bathtub stood away from the walls. A shower curtain hung behind it on a curtain rod that curved around, just below the ceiling, like a suspended race track. ‘How ya s’pose to use it?’ Sue asked.
‘For a shower?’
She frowned over her shoulder at Neal. ‘Yeah.’
‘Just pull the curtain around on the rod. Make sure it hangs inside the tub.’
‘Looks mighty all-fired queer to me. It’d likely get on ya. Maybe I’ll just have me a bath, stead . . . instead of a shower.’
‘Now?’
‘Sure. It’ll perk me up.’
‘What about the Fort?’
‘Don’t ya wanta rest up awhile ’fore . . . before we go over there?’
‘Wouldn’t be a bad idea. I’m pretty tired. I could use a little nap.’
‘Good. So you take yerself a nap, and I’ll take me a bath. Then we’ll head on over to the Fort in maybe like an hour?’
‘Sounds good to me.’
‘Ya better go first.’
He raised his eyebrows.
Sue nodded toward the toilet. ‘I know ya gotta.’
He grimaced, and she laughed.
A few minutes later, lying on the bed with his shoes off, Neal heard the water start to run. Quickly, he pulled the bracelet out of his pocket. He slipped it onto his wrist.
Why not? Turn-about’s fair play. She did it to me . . .
When Neal heard the door open, he lifted his head off the pillow. Sue stepped out of the bathroom. She was barefoot but wearing her black leather skirt and her sleeveless blue shirt. Both her hands were busy rubbing her hair with a towel.
Her gaze flicked to the bracelet on Neal’s wrist. A corner of her mouth curved up. ‘Where you been?’ she asked.
Neal sat up on the mattress, and crossed his legs. ‘Just sleeping,’ he said. He gave her a smile that he hoped looked good and smirky.
Standing near the foot of the bed, Sue continued to rub her hair with the towel as she stared into his eyes. ‘So ya slept, huh?’
‘Yep.’
She smiled as if she knew better. ‘I know good an well ya was in me. Were in me. And you know I know.’
‘How would I know that?’
‘You know how.’
‘Tell me.’
‘I told ya in my head, and ya know it,’ Sue said. ‘We had us a fine, long talk.’
‘Must’ve been rather one-sided.’
‘Ya know dang well . . .!’
He shook his head.
Somehow managing to frown and smile at the same time, Sue draped the towel over her shoulders and crawled onto the mattress. On hands and knees, she stared into Neal’s eyes. ‘Admit it. C’mon.’
‘No.’
‘Come on. It ain’t no big deal.’
‘Isn’t,’ he said.
Sue rolled her eyes upward. ‘I knew ya were gonna do it. I planned on ya doin it. That was the whole idea. Ya know? ’Cause I owed ya. And I wanted ya to know how I feel . . . about you. From the inside.’
She gazed into his eyes.
‘Ya know all that,’ she muttered. ‘Ya were in me, so ya know everything.’
He shook his head.
‘Like all ’bout the grand tour.’
He smiled. ‘Grand tour? Of what?’
‘Ya know dang well.’
‘Of you?’
Her mouth dropped open again. She gaped at him.
‘Damn! I missed it.’
Shaking her head slowly from side to side, Sue muttered, ‘Judas H. Priest on a rubber crutch.’
‘I slept,’ Neal said.
‘Ya slept.’
‘Honest to God. The fact is, I almost paid you a visit. I put the bracelet on. I sure wanted to jump inside you and . . . I mean, my God, everything else aside, you were taking a bath.’
‘Ya better believe it.’
‘I just figured . . . you know, there’s Marta.’
‘Ya were’t aimin to tell her?’
‘Even if she never found out about it,’ he said, ‘I’d know. It would’ve been like cheating on her.’
‘Ya aren’t married to her.’
‘No, but . . . It wasn’t just because of Marta. I didn’t want to use you that way. Invade your privacy. Spy on you. It seemed wrong. Besides, it’s against the rules to use the bracelet on someone you . . . care about. That was Elise’s first warning. You might find out things you shouldn’t.’
Sue, still on her hands and knees in front of him, still gazing into his eyes, was now slowly moving her head up and down. ‘You’d of found out plenty,’ she said.
‘Well . . .’ Neal shrugged.
Sue raised her right hand off the mattress and pointed her forefinger at him. ‘Ya got no idea what ya missed, buddy,’ she said. Smiling gently, she pressed her fingertip against the end of his nose.
He tried to smile.
‘But ya sure win points for honor.’ She put her hand down and crawled backward. As she lowered her legs off the end of the mattress, she said, ‘Betcha was a Boy Scout.’
He blushed. ‘Yep. A Baptist, too. But that was all a long time ago.’
‘Well, some stuff sticks.’
‘It’s pure hell, being virtuous.’
Laughing, Sue tugged the towel off her shoulders. ‘Ya got yerself a long ways to go before they start puttin ya up fer sainthood. Ya got that honor, but ya also got a dirty mind and a mean temper.’
The words shocked him.
‘Temper? What temper?’
‘Ya let me fall and hit the table on purpose, back at lunch. I also happen to know all ’bout how ya slugged that Karen gal in the belly last night.’
‘I had to do that.’
‘Didn’t have to like it.’
He started to protest, but realized it would be pointless. Why try to deny it? Sue had been inside his head when he saw the nude painting on the bar and remembered punching Karen. She knew the truth.
Hot with shame, he muttered, ‘I’m not perfect.’
‘Nope. But y’ain’t too bad, taken all-round.’
‘Thanks. You ain’t, either.’
‘Aren’t.’ She grinned.
Thirty
As Neal put his shoes back on, Sue said, ‘We could save us some money if only just one of us goes in the Fort.’
‘Save even more if neither of us goes in,’ he told her.
‘How I meant is like, I go in normal, and you go in by the bracelet. Ya know? Ridin me? That way, we get in for half the price.’
He looked at her, and was tempted.
But the temptation had been far greater when she’d been taking her bath. He’d resisted that; he could resist this blatant offer.
‘You sure are eager to get me in you,’ he pointed out.
She shrugged. ‘I got nothin to hide.’
‘S
o it would seem.’
‘Anyhow, ya know?’ She wiggled her shoulders and hips, moving her hands slightly up and down in front of her like a juggler. ‘I’d be like yer host, ya know? It’d be my job to show you a good time. I’d go on all the rides, and chow down on snacks, and just do everything. It’d be great, ya know? You just stay here in the room, and I gain all the weight, and if the Pony Express crashes or somethin when I’m on it, I’m the one that cashes in her chips, and yer home free.’
‘That’s a pleasant thought.’
‘Well, I . . . I’m not lookin to get killed. Only if it did happen, you could just bail and stay all nice and safe.’
‘Very thoughtful of you.’
‘Well, it’d save us the money, too.’
‘Why do we want to save money? Before you know it, we’ll have fifty thousand dollars.’
‘Well, that’s still sort of iffy, ya know?’
Neal got to his feet and said, ‘Let’s both go over to the Fort. I came all this way; I’m not about to stay in the room and try to get all my fun from in you.’
‘It’d be more fun from in me.’
‘Maybe.’
‘Ya don’t know what yer missing.’
‘Oh, I can imagine. But I need to go myself. For one thing, I’m hungry. Getting to enjoy your snacks won’t quite do the trick.’
‘Okey-doke,’ she said. ‘Just thought I’d make the offer.’
‘You ready to go?’
‘Almost.’ She returned to the bathroom and shut the door.
While she was gone, Neal wondered what to do with the bracelet. He thought about putting it into his overnight bag with the pistol, but was afraid that it might get stolen if he left it in the room. So he took it off his wrist and stuffed it into a front pocket of his trousers.
Sue came out of the bathroom with her denim purse swinging by her hip. She was wearing her white socks and sneakers. The towel no longer draped her shoulders, but it had left dark patches of moisture on the blue of her shirt. Her hair, still damp, had been combed or brushed backward. It swept behind her ears and hung like a thick yellow banner down her back. She looked pale and fresh and wonderful.
‘Do I look okay?’ she asked.
‘Great. Ready to go?’
She peered down at herself, then stepped over to a mirror and studied her reflection. ‘I look great to me, too,’ she finally said, and laughed.