“I wouldn’t say no to you.”
I have to be honest when I say I like hearing that.
“We can date all you like, it doesn’t mean we have to live apart.”
“You’re being bossy again,” she points out…as she likes to do. “Why are you so adamant that we live together from the start?”
“Because I don’t think what we have is nothing. The way I feel about you and Zach it’s inevitable you’ll be back here with me. Tell me, what better way is there to get to know each other? I don’t want to waste any time, not with you. It doesn’t matter if you’re here or somewhere else, I know I’ll be falling asleep next to you every night and waking up beside you each and every morning. Why not do that here?”
I couldn’t be any more serious right now. I feel like I am laying my life on some imaginary line and the only outcome I can accept is for her to agree to stay with me.
“This is crazy,” she whispers lightly.
Not standing it any longer, I move around the table and crouch down before her.
“I told you once that I’d know when I met the one and I fuckin’ know you’re the one for me.”
I hope to fuck she hears the sincerity in my words because I don’t want to let her go.
“And what about Zachery? The way he’s changed around you, I don’t want him getting hurt.”
“I know I’m not his father. I would never take that away from Billy, regardless of the fact that he’s dead, I’ll take care of him as if he was my own blood. The same way I do for my brothers at the club. None of them are my blood but there isn’t one of them I wouldn’t die for, none more so than you and Zach. Let me make you both happy.”
She sits before me in silence, watching me. I can see her mind ticking over and over deciding what to do next.
Time has never passed by slowly waiting for her decision.
“Okay.”
“Okay?” I ask, because the way she said it could mean anything and I want to be sure.
“Okay I’ll stay. We’ll see where this takes us but if it doesn’t work I’ll take Zachery and we’ll leave.”
“You’re mine now, I’m not going to let it not work,” I grin, leaning into her.
“If I’m yours, does this mean you’re completely mine?” she asks, meekly.
I should have expected her to ask. God knows what she has heard about the women at the club. Her already preconceived ideas about the club were bad enough.
“One hundred per cent yours. Since you showed up demanding answers I haven’t been able to think about any other woman.”
I can see she believes me when she exhales and smiles.
“I can’t believe we’re doing this,” she giggles.
“You’ll believe it later when I’m between these,” I say, spreading her legs apart and leaning in closer, “And showing you what you do to me.”
Her slight shudder as my breath hits her neck gives me images of her whole body shuddering as I go down between her legs.
“I can’t wait,” she murmurs.
I bring my hand up and cup her chin so she’s looking at me and give her a taste of what to expect tonight. The kiss doesn’t last long but it is just enough to leave us both wanting more, much more.
“I take it you’re not going to help me find a place then?” she teases.
“No way in hell, I want you both here with me.” I tell her seriously.
“Not to ruin the moment but we still do need to talk.”
“About what?”
“About what happens next, if you want us to stay there’s going to be mess and toys everywhere, although I do tidy up constantly. Zachery’s going to need his own room and…”
I cut her off before she can become any more worked up for nothing.
“First of all, I don’t give a shit about mess and toys and secondly, Zachery can have the guest room and you can decorate it however you like. It really isn’t anything to worry about. Stop trying to find reasons for this not to work.”
“You’re right. How about I wear Zachery out today and cook for us tonight. We can talk about everything then.”
“I don’t plan on talking darlin’,” I smirk, I know I look cocky but I truly don’t see us doing much talking not when she has given herself to me.
“And I didn’t plan on talking all night,” she says, coyly.
“In that case, I’ve got some shit to do then I’ll crash at the club for a while. I’ll be back in plenty of time for ‘talking’,” I tell her.
Before she could utter another word about us being together I closed the gap between us and kissed her hard, a kiss that will set the precedent for all future kisses.
Zachery is still eating his breakfast beside us and I know I should pull away, but as my lips connect to hers they became fused together. There is no where I’d rather be. Gauging by her response, she is feeling everything I am too.
Reluctantly, I pull away first, leaving us both breathless and her lips slightly swollen.
“I should go so I can get back to you.”
My voice is trembling for the first time in my life. This is it and I know for sure she is the one for me.
“I’ll be here,” she smiles.
Hearing she will be here waiting for me is music to my fucking ears that I have been waiting a lifetime to hear.
I forced myself to stand and step away from her to try and gain some clarity. Too bad she was trying to kill me without knowing it and follows me up and steps into my arms, linking her hands in mine.
“We probably should’ve spoke about this before, but will you tell me more about your club now we’re together?”
For a brief moment it crosses my mind that she could be playing me to gain information, but as quick as I think that the thought vanishes. This is for real. There is no denying the sexual chemistry between us and not only that, the way we can talk to each other, how close we have become in such a short amount of time. This is definitely for real.
“We’ll talk later,” I tell her, “Today I want you to get comfortable here because like I said, I’m not going to let this not work, okay?”
“Okay.”
Before leaving I kiss her on her forehead and say goodbye to Zach.
I leave the house one happy fucker. I don’t care I haven’t slept in twenty-four hours. At this point in time my eyes have never been more open and alert. I have never been more alive.
It isn’t my first choice to sleep at the clubhouse but I know if I go home after I’ve spoken to Cas, I won’t be sleeping knowing Kristen is awake in the same house. I need some sleep today to be on top form with her tonight.
Chapter Eleven
Kristen
I could still feel Slade on my lips a half hour after he left. I really should be scared of the speed our relationship is taking but somehow this feels right. He was right, what is the point in waiting? My father’s death has shown me to make the most out of life and to live it without regrets.
I haven’t been able to stop smiling throughout getting both Zachery and I washed and dressed. Slade told me to get comfortable here but the truth is I already am, and so is Zachery.
For the first time in a long time, I can see a future and the pains of the past don’t hurt so much. From now on, no more dwelling on the past. Onwards and upwards as my mom would say. Firstly, a trip to the store to buy dinner for tonight.
Locking the door behind us, I look around the street and realise this is where we live now. Friendly, quiet neighbours with a path I can see Slade teaching Zachery how to ride a bicycle on. This gives me the strength to move forward.
The store is busier than usual when we arrive, walking up and down the aisle, I realise I know more about Slade than I thought I did, his eating preferences anyway.
After choosing ingredients for a simple stir-fry I roam the aisles picking up groceries that I know Zachery likes and Slade doesn’t have in stock.
The queue at the checkout is longer than any queue I’ve seen here before and I
brace myself for a long wait. Forty minutes later and seventy-four dollars lighter, I’m finally pushing the cart out to the car.
Loading the groceries into the trunk a dark shadow falls over me. Turning around sharply I find a young man standing close behind us with one hand on the shopping cart where Zachery is still sitting. My hand strikes out and I hold onto the other end of the cart.
“Take your hand off,” I snap, looking around for help but there’s no one I can see.
“I’m not here to harm you ma’am,” the man says.
“I’ll believe you when you’re not holding my son.”
“You’re not leaving till you’ve heard my message.”
Who the hell is this man?
“Tell me what you have to say and leave us alone.” I say.
“Someone wants you to know that the guy Billy you were looking for didn’t die in a car crash. He was beaten to death because of Alannah Blake.”
“Excuse me? What did you just say?” I ask, because I’m pretty sure I just heard him say Billy was beaten to death and that would make Slade a liar.
“You heard me.”
“Who are you?” I ask.
“I’m someone who was paid to relay a message and now I have. Goodbye.”
He released his hand and turned to walk away.
“Hey, wait!” I call out, but he doesn’t stop and before long he disappears around the corner of the store.
I throw the rest of the groceries into the trunk not caring if anything spills or breaks and get Zachery in his seat within seconds. As soon as I am in the driving seat I am buckled and the doors are locked in case the unknown man returns.
I slam my hands against the wheel over and over again. I knew it, I knew there was something they were hiding. Why did I give up? Oh yeah, because I let a guy and his six pack distract me and let me think he actually cared about me and wanted me. The only thing he cared about was keeping me from the truth.
As soon as Billy’s face entered my mind I couldn’t stop the tears. It was bad enough to imagine his last moments of life dying in an accident but imagining him being punched and kicked and worse until he took his last breath was too much to take in.
No more lies. I need to know the truth and I’ll be damned if I don’t get it now.
I turn the engine on and put my foot down until I am driving into their clubhouse or whatever the fuck they call it and cut the engine.
I don’t give myself a chance to think about what I am going to do. I get out of the car and unbuckle Zachery. I look around the grounds to see if Slade is about but when I don’t see him anywhere I know I have to go inside.
A car pulling up beside me, as I stand frozen in place, disturbs me. When I see it’s Bonnie, I feel sick remembering that I trusted her advice and opinion.
“Are you okay Kristen?” she asks when she sees me.
“I need to see Slade,” I tell her and I wish I didn’t sound so hurt.
“Okay, do you want me to watch Zachery while you find him?” she asks, from the look on her face she knows something is wrong and is taking it easy around me.
“No, I don’t want him near any of you,” I snap.
Hurt flashes across her face and I force down the guilt of inflicting it on her and tell myself she has lied to me as much as the others have.
“Kristen, what’s going on?” she demands.
Before I can answer Sparky is joining us and wrapping his arm around her waist and pulling her closer into him. And to think I was jealous of their relationship.
He must sense tension between us because he asks, “What’s goin’ on?” and steps closer to me and Zachery and I step back quickly, I don’t want him any closer than he already is.
“What the fuck? Why are you scared of me?” he strains.
“She needs to see Slade,” Bonnie tells him, placing her hand on his shoulder.
He narrows his eyes and steps back.
“Follow me.”
I follow him into the main building and notice a bar inside that I didn’t notice before.
“Wait here and I’ll go get him.”
I watch him disappear up some stairs and my anger bypasses the hurt I’m feeling. But my resolve to know the truth is growing stronger by the second. None of these brutes will deter me from that.
I cling to Zachery and hold him tight against me. I wish he wasn’t here but without a single person I can trust here, there isn’t anywhere else he could be.
Slade comes bounding down the stairs and heads straight towards me. He looks worried and agitated, I must have woken him up as he’s half-dressed and the chest I thought I wouldn’t get enough of reminds me he was only a distraction from the truth.
“What’s wrong darlin’?”
“I’m not your darlin’,” I snap, “I want you to tell me the fucking truth! How did Billy die?”
After the words have left my mouth the whole place goes quiet.
Slade looks around quickly before settling back on me and steps forward. Like with Sparky, I step back and the pain on his face only angers me. What right does he have to feel hurt?
“What’s happened?” he demands.
“Answer me first Slade.”
He visibly pales before me and runs his hand through his hair roughly. Sparky and Cas come and stand behind Slade and Cas whispers something in his ear.
“I swear to fucking God, if you don’t answer me I’ll go to the only name he gave me and ask her myself,” I warn him.
“Ask who yourself? And who told you what?” Cas asks roughly, coming closer. Slade puts his arm out to stop him coming any closer.
“I’m not telling you anything until I hear the truth about how Billy died,” I snap.
My patience has well and truly worn out and the longer I stand here, the more I feel like screaming.
“Tell her,” Alannah says, coming up behind me from the door, “She should know the truth.”
My heart has long passed pounding into my chest, it feels like it is bungee jumping. The only thing keeping me in place is Zachery. Thank God he isn’t old enough to understand this.
Slade looks to his side and after a quick nod from Cas, he reaches out and pulls me by my arm to the couches at the other side of the room.
“Don’t you touch me,” I say through gritted teeth and shrug his hand away.
We’re not alone either. Cas, Alannah, Sparky and Bonnie follow with the others moving in a bit closer too.
I sit on one end of the couch and thankfully Slade respects me enough not to sit next to me and lowers himself onto the other end.
I look at Alannah and see she’s wearing the same expression she wore the first day I arrived. Now I know it is guilt. Cas moves closer to her in a protective stance and I look back to Slade who is watching me carefully.
“When I was at the store someone told me I should know Billy was really beaten to death and it was all her fault.” I can’t help the venom in my voice or in my glare I throw Alannah’s way.
“Who told you that?” Cas growls.
Alannah looks distraught hearing my words but I don’t care, her reaction is only making me feel like the strange man at the store is right.
“I’m not saying anything else until I get the truth.” I say.
“Billy didn’t die in a car accident,” Slade begins. I brace myself for the truth I seek so desperately, “He was given an order and in the end it got him killed.”
“I want you to know I think of Billy every single day,” Alannah cuts in.
“So it was your fault?” I ask.
“You need to stop fuckin’ sayin’ that,” Cas warns, “Lana was as much a victim as Billy.”
“Just tell me what happened.”
“The order Billy was given was to watch over Alannah. Our enemy, who no longer exist by the way, found out where Alannah and Billy were and in retaliation they went after them. They were outnumbered and when Billy tried to stop them from kidnapping Alannah, he was attacked so badly he didn’t survive.”
Slade explains.
I can feel the contents of my stomach wanting to make an appearance but I squash the feeling and let the tears fall down my cheeks.
Poor Billy, his innocent, boyish face. No, I can’t deal with this. I can’t believe this happened to him, it sounds like something out of a movie.
The giggle erupting from me comes as a shock and once I let myself believe it feels good, I can’t make it stop.
“This ain’t fuckin’ funny. My girl still has nightmares to this day about that night.” Cas shouts.
This sobers me up.
“You’re damn right it isn’t funny, it’s damn right fucking ridiculous,” I shout back, “At least your girl is alive to have nightmares, Billy isn’t is he.” I say to Cas, “I knew this club was bad and you let me believe otherwise.” I say, looking at Bonnie, “I need to go,” I say standing up and readjust Zachery on my hip.
“You haven’t heard all the details yet?” Slade says, jumping up beside me to stop me from leaving.
“I’ve heard enough.” I tell him.
He doesn’t move and we stare each other out. I’m determined not to be the first one to back down but I don’t know who I’m looking at when I look into his eyes anymore.
“I’m not letting you leave like this,” he says, quietly.
“You don’t have a choice, now get out of my way Slade and don’t ever come near us again.”
Silence falls around us and no one moves. Panic sets in and I wonder if I’ll make it out of a room full of killers?
What comes out of my mouth next probably isn’t wise but it’s the only play I have left to make it out of this place.
“If you make me wait then I’ll just have the police walk me out of here, I did call them before I came here.”
There, I said it, hopefully he lets us leave now?
This wakes him up and he falls back a step.
“You called the cops? You called them after I told you how we work?” he asks in disbelief and disgust.
I couldn’t make myself speak so I nodded.
“I’d call your bluff as I don’t think you did but I won’t stop you from leaving. I don’t want you to go without knowing the full truth but I can see you’re not ready to hear it.”