Not half bad.
I don’t wear any make-up other than eyeliner, mascara, and blush. I’ve always considered myself lucky that it takes me only fifteen minutes if I don’t need to shower. High-maintenance and I don’t mix, and I am thankful for that.
I pass the living room where my parents are seated in their usual spots watching television. “Bryce, is that you?” My mother calls out when she hears the tapping of my heels.
I pop my head in and notice Mikey is also in the room, deeply lost in his Gameboy. He doesn’t even bother looking up.
“Oh my gosh!” my mother gushes when she sees me, her hands going straight to her mouth. “You look beautiful!”
This warrants Mikey’s attention as he curiously looks up from his game’s small screen.
“Doesn’t she look beautiful, Tom?” my mother exclaims.
He nods smiling back at me. “You look beautiful, Bryce. You headed somewhere?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. I just felt like dressing up. I can’t get ahold of Tyson, but I think I am going to go downtown anyways.”
I’ve never seen my parents smile bigger.
My mother instantly stands and rushes to me, embracing me tightly. “Have I told you how proud I am of you?”
I can’t help but smile. I’m proud of me too. A couple of days ago this would be my worst nightmare; but not today. Today, I couldn’t be more excited for what lies ahead. I nod into her shoulder.
She releases me, but still holds one of my hands. “We all are.”
I blush. I’ve been waiting a long time to hear my parents say anything like that. “Thanks,” I say sheepishly.
“Now go out and paint the town red!” my mother exclaims with a wide-eyed expression.
I nod and then make my way out to the garage where my car has been sitting untouched. As I climb in the driver’s seat, I let my fingers slide across the dashboard and steering wheel. Just like riding a bike.
I pull out my cell phone from my purse and attempt to call Tyson once more before I make my way into downtown Phoenix all by myself. This time he answers.
“Hello?” he says, but something is different in his voice.
“Tyson?”
“Hey,” he replies, sounding strange, almost as if he is out of breath.
“Are you okay?” I ask, not sure what is going on.
“Yeah,” he says and then groans in pain.
“What’s going on?” I ask, my heart beginning to beat frantically.
“I got in a car accident.” Weak. He sounds weak.
“What?” I cry out. “Are you okay? Where are you?”
He starts coughing lightly. “I’m at home.”
“At home? What do you mean you’re at home?” My mind is racing a mile a minute. “I thought you said you got in a car accident?”
“I did,” he replies softly. “On Sunday.”
“Sunday?” He was with me Sunday. How could he have…? “I’m coming. Don’t move!” I hang up the phone quickly. I can’t wait any longer. The suspense is killing me. I press the button on the garage door opener and race as quickly as I can down the driveway.
I don’t realize it until I’ve driven nearly the entire way there that I am returning to the scene of the crime. Tyson still lives in the same house that he did when we originally met. I have to see my old house and the exact spot Robbie lit me on fire. I think I’m going to have an anxiety attack.
I debate turning around, but I know Tyson needs me. He needs me to be strong for him. When I arrive and park, I try to avoid letting my eyes glance over to the area, but it’s harder than I thought it would be. I can see the spot clear as day. There is no grass there, still, just dirt. It’s a terrible reminder. I shudder and then quickly race up the stairs at Tyson’s house. I knock frantically at the door, hoping they won’t leave me out staring at my past for too long.
One of Tyson’s roommates opens the door. He is freakishly tall, dark skinned, and lanky.
“I’m here to see Tyson,” I greet him.
“Sure, come on in.” He opens the door wide for me to enter and then closes it behind me. “You must be Bryce.”
“You’ve heard about me?” I ask, shaking his gigantic hand.
“Heard about you?” He laughs heartily. “Tyson hasn’t shut up about you since I moved in. I’ve been wondering when I would meet you.”
“And you are?” He obviously has spoken to Tyson about me, but strangely, Tyson doesn’t speak about his roommates often.
“I’m Grae.”
“Nice to meet you.” I avert my eyes from his and look down the hall, perplexed.
“His bedroom is normally upstairs, but because of the accident, I’ve been letting him use my bed. Come on, I’ll show you where it is.” He reads my mind with little to no effort.
“Is he okay?” I ask as I anxiously follow his tall frame down the hall.
“He will be.”
I let those words consume me as he finally rounds the last corner and opens a red door. Behind it, I can see Tyson lying on the bed. I don’t see any casts of any sort, so that has to be a good sign.
Tyson gazes up, appearing tired. “I can’t believe you…”
His face is cut and bruised in multiple places. His lip looks busted open.
I rush past Grae and straight to his bed. “What happened?” I sit down gently beside Tyson, careful not to get too close as I still have no clue how serious his injuries are.
“I don’t know.” He shakes his head lightly. “I remember leaving your house, and then you know the stoplight on Jefferson and Third?”
I nod.
“It was a yellow light and I was a decent amount away, so I tried braking, and nothing. My brakes were completely out. My car went through the red light, and I got sideswiped.”
“What do you mean your brakes were out?” I press, wanting to know more.
“I mean, I was pressing it and nothing was happening…they think someone tampered with them.”
I gasp. “What? Are you serious?”
“The cop on the scene checked my brake line and told me later that it was cut.”
I swallow, trying to digest the information he is feeding me without completely breaking down.
“Who would do something so malicious like that?” I ask. “Wasn’t your car fine when you went to get the movies on Saturday night?”
He nods. “It was working fine, which means it had to have happened between Saturday night and Sunday afternoon.”
I think back to that timeframe and suddenly, a chill takes over my entire body. “No.” I shake my head profusely.
“What is it?” he asks, his chocolate eyes boring into mine.
“It can’t be.” I stand up quickly from the bed and begin pacing.
He is watching me intently with his eyes and attempts to sit up further, then cries out in pain.
I rush to his side. “You alright?”
He fights to smile. “Yeah, just dealing with a few broken ribs, a concussion, and a lot of cuts and bruises.” His expression hardens. “Now tell me what you were about to say.”
I take a deep breath in, trying to contemplate the possibility of what is about to come out of my mouth. “Remember the other night at my house when I told you I thought I saw someone outside?”
He nods, fixated on me.
“What do you think the chances are that person is the same person who cut your brake line?”
He sighs loudly, running his hand over his hair. “A definite possibility.”
I shudder at the thoughts racing through my mind. “What if that person was Robbie?”
Tyson’s eyes bulge out at me. “Robbie…your Robbie?”
I nod.
“Then I think we need to make a police report.”
I swallow, digesting everything. “You didn’t make one already?”
He shakes his head. “They did a report on my accident and then called me to let me know about the brake line being cut. They asked me if I had any idea of any
one who would want to harm me. At the time, I couldn’t think of anyone.”
I take a deep breath in, attempting to slow my dizzying thoughts. “What if it is Robbie?” I can’t help the fear that radiates off of my voice.
Tyson grabs my hand quickly, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “Then he’s going to be sorry. I won’t let anything happen to you. I promise.”
I shoot him a small smile back. He could have died and yet, I’m still the one he wants to protect after it all. I don’t know that I deserve him, but I definitely appreciate him.
Before
* * *
“I haven’t accepted my body fully yet, but it’s getting easier to think about it.”
“Thank you, Eileen,” Jerry initiates the clapping. “Who’s next?” His emerald eyes scan the small circle and I keep mine trained to the ground. If I don’t make eye contact, he won’t call on me.
I’ve been attending a support group at the hospital. It’s all burn victims and it’s supposed to be a way to help us overcome our hesitations out in the real world and with our own body image. I don’t even recognize the skin I’m in anymore. It’s littered with discolored scars even after the three surgeries I’ve already endured. I’m scheduled for another surgery in a few weeks, but I am beginning to lose faith that I will ever get back to the girl I used to be. I feel like an imposter in her skin.
The depression has been unbearable most days so I’ve been keeping to myself. Turns out, it’s been a lot easier to play pretend. To shut myself down, not speak with anyone, and daydream about the alternate route my life could have taken. They say I’m almost ready to leave here. I can’t go back to my old house, so my parents have offered to take me back in. I don’t want to burden them, but it does make me feel safer knowing I won’t be alone. My mother’s been begging me to talk to her for weeks now, but I have no energy. It’s hard enough to keep my eyelids open, much less hold any sort of conversation.
She’s worried about me; about what I might do. I’ve heard her speak to my nurses, asking if my behavior is normal. I don’t even know what normal is anymore. Robbie is still out there. For all I know, he’s going to be back to finish the job. I have nightmares about it nightly, sweating out my fears.
The police have been hunting for Robbie since the night he tried to take my life from me. There are leads every day pertaining to his whereabouts, but it’s as if he vanished without a trace. Sometimes I’m too scared to sleep. My anxiety gets the better of me most nights. I used to be somebody, now I feel invisible, like a nobody. No one is ever going to want me now.
“Okay, guys, thanks for the great day today. We’re done. I’ll see you guys back here on Tuesday,” Jerry’s voice breaks into my thoughts. I blink my eyes a few times, surprised the group is over.
I’m leaving here in a couple of days, they’ve been hinting at it all week. I’m panicking. At the hospital, there are people around constantly so I never feel like I’m alone. My parents have their own lives so I know they aren’t going to be able to stay home with me all the time. I feel crippled by fear. He took away everything from me: my dignity, my physical appearance, my confidence. He doesn’t deserve another thought from me, but I’m worried I am never going to be free of my fear as long as he is still out there.
Seven: That Time My Best Friend Confessed His Feelings for Me
A few days later after Tyson has had a chance to rest up, we make our way into the police station to file a report on the man we saw outside my window, and the brake line issue with Tyson’s car. Because we have no firm proof, I’m not sure how much good it will do, but it does make me feel more secure.
As we exit the courthouse, a bubbly blond comes bouncing up the stairs, nearly running me over. “Um, excuse me,” I say shortly as her shoulder comes into contact with mine.
“Oh, I’m sorry,” she says, and then her eyes lock on Tyson’s. “Tyson! I heard about your accident, are you okay?” She forgets I exist as she quickly shuffles over to him and gives him a hug.
“Ouch,” he mutters from the impact.
“I’m sorry!” Her apology to him seems more sincere. “Are you okay?”
He breaks out into a smile. “Yeah, just a few fractured ribs. How have you been?”
What the hell? It’s not like I’m standing here or anything.
“I’ve been good! Just here to pay off a traffic ticket.” She giggles like she just said something funny.
I clear my throat obnoxiously hoping Tyson will catch on.
“Oh yeah,” he says, slapping himself on the forehead. “I’m sorry, I forgot to introduce you. Ashleigh, this is Bryce. Bryce, Ashleigh.”
I don’t know why, but it really irritates me that he leads with her name. I’ve never heard of her before and I am his best friend.
She smiles brightly my way. “What an interesting name.”
“You’ve never met anyone named Bryce before?” I ask, highly doubting it.
“Oh, I definitely have…just never met a girl named Bryce before.” I feel like she is taking a stab at me somehow.
“Well now you have,” I reply stiffly. I want Tyson to finish chatting her up so we can be on our merry way.
She shifts her attention back to him. “You know, I haven’t seen you since…” she trails off, sliding a finger down his chest. Don’t mind me, I’m not really here. I just want to disappear.
He nods and for the first time in my life, I swear I see Tyson blush. “Yeah,” he responds, rubbing the back of his hair. “I’m sorry about that.”
She shrugs, a smile pulling at her lips. “Maybe when you’re all healed we can hang out or something?”
Irritation is bubbling inside me. Since when? I’m not really keen on them hanging out again. I’m anxious to know about their history.
He grins. “Yeah, I’d like that.”
“Me too.” She shuffles around in her purse, pulling out a piece of gum and popping it into her mouth. “Well you know where to find me. I better get going. Nice to meet you, Bryce.” It takes everything in me not to lunge for her throat.
“What was that all about?” I ask Tyson the minute she is out of earshot.
“What?” he replies, innocently.
“That.” I glance back at her.
“Oh,” he says, pausing. “I met Ashleigh at a party in the dorms.”
“How many times have you two hung out?” I ask.
Tyson sighs, rubbing his hand over his arm. “I don’t know, two or three times, maybe.”