Libby’s eyes softened, and she reached over to squeeze Amy’s hand. “None of us wants to face death, but it comes to everyone. Death is part of life. I think you should tell Curtis.”
“I don’t want to. Not yet.”
Libby pulled down glasses from the cabinet. “So you’re going to let fear rule you.”
Amy winced. “No, I’m just not going to go into something so personal.”
“You’re holding back who you really are from Curtis. Hiding the real Amy behind those eyes. Half an hour ago I would have said you feared nothing, but you do. You’re afraid of being judged, yet you’re judging how everyone else will react.”
Libby’s words hit her hard, and she pressed her hand to her stomach. “I’m not afraid.”
But as she gave the denial, she knew it was a lie. She wanted people to like her. She was quick to judge others and to assume what people would think, but she was afraid to be up front about who she really was. Maybe Libby was right, but she couldn’t bear to see Curtis retreat when he heard the news.
The thought of telling Curtis the truth made her quail. Could she trust him with the truth? What if he left her too? Her feelings about him were already entangled, and ripping them out by the roots would be more painful than she was prepared to face.
Raine slept on her chest, and Amy didn’t want to move. The Bournes had gone home an hour ago, and her parents had gone to bed, but though Curtis had offered to take Raine and leave, she’d shaken her head and held the little girl close.
What if she pursued custody herself? Raine might be the only child she could ever raise. And she was a tiny piece of Ben. The thought grew in her mind. It would mean the end of any budding relationship with Curtis, but was there a future anyway? Her medical history indicated otherwise.
He tossed a pillow at her. “Penny for your thoughts.”
“They’re not even worth that.” She shifted Raine a bit. The baby’s hair lay in damp curls on her forehead. “She’s as hot as an August afternoon.”
“Lay her on the sofa.” He rose from his favorite armchair by the fireplace and came toward her. “Need some help?”
“I can do it.” She eased the sleeping child onto the cushion, then fanned herself. “I think I need some iced tea.”
“Me too.”
When she rose, she pulled the other cushion from the couch and dropped it on the floor so if Raine happened to roll off, she’d fall onto the soft surface. A couple of throw pillows tucked against the child helped ensure her safety. Curtis and Amy went to the kitchen where she poured glasses of iced tea.
There was a rattle outside. “What on earth? It sounds like someone is in the trash.” She threw open the door and stepped onto the deck. The banker pony was nosing in her metal trash can. His tail swished as if he liked whatever he was eating. “I didn’t know horses ate garbage.”
“Bet you’ve got the corncobs from dinner in there, don’t you? They love corn.” He tried to shoo the horse away, but the pony ignored him.
“Fabio, get out of there.” She slapped the horse on the rump, and he backed his head out and snorted as if to ask her why she was being so mean.
Curtis lifted a brow. “Fabio?” He snickered. “What kind of name is that for a horse?”
Her face went hot. “Er, Fabio is a male actor who poses on romance novels. Don’t you think my horse looks like a star?”
His grin widened. “Romance novels, huh? You read those things?”
“Every woman likes a little happily-ever-after.”
She tugged on the pony’s mane and managed to get him away from the trash can. Fabio snorted and jerked his head but went along with her bidding. She hadn’t realized that Curtis had followed until his hands came down on her shoulders. From behind, he pulled her against his chest and rested his chin on her head. Cradled like this, she could enjoy his touch without him seeing her expression.
“I think even guys like to think happiness with one woman for life exists.” His breath stirred her hair as he spoke.
One partner for life. Was it too good to be true? She opened her mouth to tell him about her situation, then closed it again. Wouldn’t he think it presumptuous to tell him when he hadn’t said a word about holding any special feelings for her? For all she knew, he might not have the same strong yearning squeezing his heart that she had pressing on hers. This romance stuff was hard.
Fabio hadn’t wandered far. He stood a few feet away, tossing his head as if he wanted her to notice him. “Do you think he’d let me ride him? By now, he knows me pretty well.”
“The bankers are pretty docile, but he might throw you.”
She moved out of the shelter of his embrace to lay her palm against the horse’s rough coat. Fabio’s skin quivered under her fingertips. “Easy, boy.” She ran a caressing hand along his back. “Give me a boost, Curtis.”
“I’m not so sure about this.” But he came to her side and laced his fingers together for her to step into.
She put her bare foot in his hands, and he helped lift her onto Fabio’s back. The horse jumped when her weight settled on his back. He stamped his feet and neighed, a nervous, high-pitched sound. She patted his neck. “Easy.”
Her fingers tangled into his mane, and she touched her heels to his flank. He reacted immediately and bolted for the trees. “Whoa, whoa!” She tightened her grip on his mane and held on as best she could, though her backside was sliding to one side.
The trees loomed nearer, and she leaned down with her cheek to the horse’s sweaty neck. His eyes rolled back in his head. It would be better to bail off now before he entered the trees. At least there would be grass to stop her fall. She was sliding more to the left, so she kicked free and released her grip on his mane.
In the next moment, she hit the ground. She felt the jar in every bone of her body. Pain traveled up her arm and into her neck, and the fall knocked the breath from her lungs. She lay on the ground and struggled to draw in a breath.
“Amy!” Curtis was by her side. He touched her head and ran his fingers down her cheek. “Are you hurt? Can you talk?”
She wanted to tell him she’d be fine if she could just get her lungs to work, but she didn’t have enough breath to speak. Then a rush of oxygen expanded her chest, and she drank in the sweet taste of the night air. She nodded, and he slid his hand under her and helped her into a seated position.
He cradled her close. “You scared the fire out of me. I couldn’t lose you too.” He pressed his lips against her forehead in a fervent kiss.
Her fists clutched his shirt, and she clung to him and willed him to kiss her. His lips came down on hers, and as she tasted the passion in his kiss, she allowed herself to believe that maybe, just maybe, they had something enduring between them.
TWENTY-SEVEN
Amy palpated Mindy Stewart’s belly, then listened to the baby’s heartbeat. She looped her stethoscope around her neck and smiled. “Everything looks good, Mindy. The baby is growing, and your weight is excellent. Your little one should be making her appearance in about four weeks.”
Mindy swung her legs off the table and hopped down. “I’m so glad you’re here, Amy. Can you give me a list of the things I need to have ready for a home delivery?”
Amy handed her a list of the items to purchase. “If you’d like to order a kit online, some companies I work with will send everything together. They have a fair price on it too.”
She walked Mindy to the door and waved her off. She loved this part of her chosen career—the excitement of preparing for new life, the visualizing of the new family unit. Women on the island had heard she was staying. Her week already had a few appointments, and she made a mental note to call her supervising physician and give him a list of the new patients. Though he would not see them, he needed to affirm the fact that she wasn’t taking on too much.
And she’d finally made an appointment to get her blood drawn again. Now she would be on tenterhooks every time the phone rang.
Her parents had le
ft this morning, thank goodness. Now she could get back to figuring out what had happened to Ben. There were no more patients today, and she intended to track down Curtis. Saturday night’s interlude still made her breath catch in her throat. She was going to have to tell him, though she dreaded it. If he wasn’t busy today, she’d spill the truth. Her parents had attended church with her yesterday, and Curtis hadn’t been there. Amy had heard he was working, but she had to wonder if the kiss they’d shared had kept him up half the night like it had her.
She changed from her skirt to a pair of shorts, then grabbed her keys and headed for the door. A Harley rumbled to a stop in her drive, and Curtis dismounted. A scowl darkened his expression, and he clutched a piece of paper in his hand. With a sinking feeling, she suspected she knew what was on it. The warm feeling she’d started the day with evaporated.
She waited for him on the porch. “Hi, I was just coming to see you.”
He waved the paper in the air as he bounded up the steps. “Your parents didn’t waste any time. This is an order to have a paternity test done on Raine.”
“You can’t blame them for wanting to be sure.” She sat on a white rocker and pointed to the other one. “Have a seat.”
He paced the floor in front of her. “I called my attorney on his vacation, and he said it’s standard procedure to establish paternity before suing for custody. So that’s clearly their plan.”
“I’m sorry, Curtis. Truly. It’s what I feared would happen, but I tried to talk them out of it.” She softened her tone in hopes that it would help him calm down.
He dropped into the other rocker. “It’s about Gina’s past, isn’t it?” His gaze cut away, then came back to her. “I know there was a revolving door of men in her life. One-night stands, relationships that lasted two weeks, and everything in between. But that all changed when she became a Christian. It really did, Amy. Then she had Raine and she was so happy. She wasn’t seeing anyone but Ben and hadn’t since she got pregnant.” He held up the papers. “But this makes me wonder if your parents heard of her past.”
Amy didn’t want to tell him, but she had to be honest. “I told them about Gina’s past, Curtis. I thought it would be better coming from me than for their attorney to dig it up. It’s not like it was a secret.”
He stared at her. “You told them?”
“This is a small island. They would have heard it sooner or later.”
“And you judged her. You haven’t believed a word I’ve told you about how she changed.”
She ducked her head. She had been judge and jury to Gina. But didn’t she have the right to question everything? The entire tapestry of Raine’s heritage was woven with deceit. “I’m sorry, but can you blame me? You never even told us of her existence. We’ve all been shut out of the relationship. I wondered if this was why Ben didn’t marry her,” she said. “Ben had political aspirations. He’d been considering a run for the North Carolina House of Representatives. Reporters would have been quick to dig up any dirt on Gina.”
His mouth opened, then he clamped it shut and looked away.
She didn’t care for his expression—as if he’d bitten into something rotten. “What?”
He shrugged. “I didn’t much like Ben, Amy. I’m sorry if that hurts you, but a real man would have stepped up to his responsibilities. Regardless of her past, the fact was that he brought Raine into the world. He needed to be there for her. To love her and care for her needs.”
Her chest tightened. “Maybe he wasn’t sure Raine was his.”
He stared at her. “I had no idea you’d judged Gina so harshly. Haven’t you ever made a mistake? Or do you keep it all covered up?”
“Like you’re a paragon of truth!” she shot back, panicked that he would see the truth in her face. “Raine is a year old, and you didn’t bother to tell us.” When he flinched, she knew her barb had struck home. His words had hurt her too. There was much about her past that she hadn’t told him. Her own cover-ups were much worse than Gina’s. Why hadn’t she been honest the minute she stepped foot on this island? After this argument, she doubted she ever would.
She rose and walked toward the front door. “I think we need some refreshments.”
He leaped up and caught her arm, then turned her to face him. “Don’t walk out on this discussion.”
She tugged her arm from his grip. “You didn’t really know my brother!” The way her voice rose and then wobbled horrified her.
“Maybe not. But are you sure you did?”
“Are you sure you knew Gina? What about the drugs in the field and the man in the dark suit?” His eyes flickered, and she wished she could take back the words.
He swallowed and nodded. “She might have made mistakes, but she wasn’t afraid to own up to them. And she was never a hypocrite, saying one thing and thinking another.”
Amy rushed for the screen door and gave it a satisfying slam behind her. She was no hypocrite. It wasn’t a sin to hold her tongue.
All evening Curtis had regretted calling Amy a hypocrite. He’d been angry when he got that court order, and he lost his cool. Everyone kept their feelings secret, just a little. How many times had he heard his mother say she was fine when someone asked her how she was at church? And he knew perfectly well she was suffering with her arthritis. Or how about the family who was about to lose their house but didn’t tell a soul? And he had judged Gina when she was at her wildest himself. It was only later that he began to understand why she acted out.
After tossing and turning all night, he strapped Raine in her car seat and drove to Amy’s house. She’d mentioned that she would do office appointments on Mondays and Fridays and do home visits as needed on the other days. Her car was in the drive, so he laid on the horn until she came to the door.
“Sorry, I didn’t want to get Raine out of the car seat,” he called through the open window. “Want to come with me today? I have to get her DNA testing done at the court, and I thought we’d check on the investigation into the car bombing. Unless you’re working.”
She didn’t smile. “I don’t have any home visits today, but why aren’t you at work?”
“I took the day off.”
She looked cute today with her dark curls caught back in a red headband that had a flower on it. She was barefoot and wore denim shorts that showed off her fabulous tanned legs. He could look at her all day and never grow tired of it.
“Want to come, then?” When she hesitated, he added, “I’m sorry about last night. I was out of line.”
Her nod was grudging. “Let me grab my sandals.”
When she disappeared back inside the cottage, he let out the breath he was holding. Inhaling, he prayed that he could let go of the anger he’d been carrying around. It wouldn’t do any of them any good. They were supposed to be working together. And if he was honest with himself, he wanted more than friendship to develop between them.
That kiss Saturday night had changed something between them. He handed Raine some cheese crackers and waited.
When Amy came back out, she had changed her top to a blue ruffled one, and she wore some kind of woven shoes on her feet. When she buckled the seat belt, he caught a whiff of a flowery scent that wasn’t artificial.
“I smell flowers. Been working in the garden?”
She nodded. “I planted a lot of herbs today, medicinal and kitchen. That dratted Fabio keeps tearing up my patch, so I hired someone to fence it in. It’s safe from the pony now. He seems to like me, even though he about had a heart attack when I got on his back.”
He slanted a grin her way. “Who wouldn’t like you? And can I help with the gardening?”
“I can do it. I like gardening.” Her tone was still stiff. She turned around and smiled at Raine. “Hello, sweetheart.”
Raine held up a book. “Read.”
“In a little while.”
“Now.” The baby threw the book to the floor.
Amy glanced at him without smiling. “She’s quite the general.” She release
d her belt and leaned over to grab the book. Raine grabbed it and began to flip through the pages. Amy snapped herself back into the seat belt, then kicked off her shoes.
He rolled his eyes and nodded. “I have to start curbing that, but it’s so darn cute.” He started the Jeep and put it in drive. “I said I was sorry, Amy. I think you’re still mad at me.”
She stared straight ahead. “Maybe I am. I don’t know that it’s wise for us to be friends, Curtis. This is going to end badly, no matter what happens.”
What did she mean? Or was it his imagination that she put special emphasis on the word wise? And how could she know it would end badly? There were worse things to overcome than prickly parents.
He said nothing at first as he concentrated on steering the Jeep around some tourists heading to the water with boogie boards and beach bags. “It’s not going to be easy, but when I got home last night, I realized that I’m not willing to give up our friendship just because we might have a spat or two. If we keep things out in the open between us, we can navigate through this.”
He glanced at her when she didn’t answer. What was she thinking? His words should have reassured her, not caused her face to go pale. She looked out the window at first too, and not at him.
The leather seat squeaked when she finally turned a bit to face him. “And what if my parents get custody? I don’t think that’s a hurdle we can get past.”
He pressed his lips together. “They won’t get custody.”
Sadness and resignation hovered in the depths of her eyes and in the twist of her mouth. “And how will I deal with being caught between you and them? Because I know my father, Curtis. If he loses, he won’t forget it. And he’ll consider you an enemy as long as he lives.”
He knew what she was saying. The things that drew them together were tenuous, and the feelings were beginning to be deeper than mere friendship. So what if their relationship progressed to something more—like marriage? How could it survive open hostility from her parents?