“Is there something interesting in your backpack, Derek?” Mrs. Maloney asked softly, almost in a whisper.
Derek shook his head. “No way. Just my stuff.”
“Nothing in there I should know about?”
“No. No way. Unless you mean a Snickers bar and some Starburst?”
Mrs. Maloney let out a long whoosh of air. “I’m sure you’re telling the truth. But why would someone send me that note?”
Derek shrugged.
“Why don’t we just empty out the backpack and settle the whole thing.” Mrs. Maloney kept her voice low and friendly.
“No problem.” Derek lifted the pack and started to unzip it. “I don’t get it. I totally don’t.”
Holding the pack by the sides, he upended it and shook it hard, spilling the contents onto the desk. Books. Folders. A pencil box. An iPod. A cell phone. A Snickers bar.
Samuel squinted across the room, studying the contents. As soon as he saw the silvery watch slide onto the cover of a textbook, he understood.
Mrs. Maloney raised her hands to her cheeks. “Well, my faith. That is interesting,” she said softly. She picked up the watch and slid the shiny band through her fingers. “Derek? How did my watch get into your backpack?”
Derek’s face had gone pale. His mouth was working up and down, but he didn’t make a sound. He shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“Do you want to think about it?” Mrs. Maloney remained calm. No sign of anger or even surprise.
“I . . . never saw it. Really.” Derek’s eyes down, shoulders slumped. Looking guilty as hell. “I don’t know how it got there. Really.”
“But it did tumble out from the bottom of your backpack, right?”
“Yes. But—”
“Derek, why don’t you gather up your belongings here and follow me to my office for a talk. Do we need to call your mother? What do you think?”
She raised her eyes to the door and saw Samuel and Daniel standing, watching the scene intently. “What are you two lads lingering there for? This is no business of yours. Go on now. Don’t miss the bus on your first day.”
“Okay. Bye,” Samuel said, turning to leave.
“See you tomorrow,” Daniel said, then quickly added, “Good luck, Derek.”
28
“We have work to do, Sammy.” Daniel pressed his forehead against the window glass as the school bus bounced along Noyac Road, the tall trees along the side making the shadows dance in his eyes.
Samuel shifted the blue canvas backpack in his lap. He knew how impatient Daniel could be. He hoped maybe he would take his time, get to know the terrain, enjoy their new family, their new home at least a few weeks before setting things in motion.
“You gave that lug Derek a good lesson, Daniel.”
Daniel tapped Samuel’s knee with his fist. “Derek is dead in the pasture. The flies are already circling him.”
Samuel laughed. But he could see the growing intensity on his twin’s face.
“Work to do, Sammy.”
“What’s your hurry, Daniel? Haven’t we got it made here?”
“We’ve waited a long time,” Daniel murmured, gazing at a deer chewing tall weeds by the roadside. “A long time, boyo.”
“But look at us now. We’re in Heaven.”
Daniel turned away from the window. He shook his head. “Sammy, it may be heaven but there’s a devil on our cloud.”
Samuel felt a chill, muscles tightening at the back of his neck. “Who is the devil?” He knew the answer.
“The new pa.”
“Maybe he didn’t mean those things we heard him say.”
Daniel narrowed his eyes at Samuel. “He meant them. He said he didn’t want us to come. He didn’t want Mum to bring us here. And he didn’t want us to live in the little house in the backyard. Why? Because he didn’t know if he could trust us.”
That made Samuel giggle. “He can’t trust us, boyo.”
Daniel didn’t smile. His normally pale cheeks had turned rosy pink. “Pa doesn’t like us, Sammy. He doesn’t want us here. And he shouted at Mum. You saw him shout at Mum because she wants to make us happy and give us everything we want.”
“But, Daniel—”
“He doesn’t want us to be happy. Pa doesn’t want to give us the things we want. You heard him. You heard every word. We have work to do. We have plans, boyo. We cannot let the new pa stand in our way.”
Samuel felt the chill again. “What are you thinking, Daniel? Why are you saying all this? We can’t kill the new pa. We can’t. It would make Mum so sad.”
“He’s a devil, Sammy. A devil in our heaven.”
Samuel grabbed his brother’s wrist. “Don’t think it. We can’t do that to Mum.”
“You’re right. You’re the sensible guy, Sammy. As sensible as potatoes in chowder. We don’t want to kill Pa. We just have to keep him busy.”
Samuel shook his head. The backpack suddenly felt heavy in his lap. He let it slide to the bus floor. “Keep him busy?”
Daniel nodded. He had that thoughtful look in his eyes that Samuel knew well.
“How do we keep him busy? What do you mean?”
A thin smile played over Daniel’s lips. “I have some ideas. We can keep him real busy, Sammy. Maybe with the coppers.”
29
Mark watched from the front window as the dark blue Audi pulled up the driveway. A young man with a thick head of wavy brown hair and a seriously tanned face climbed out. He leaned into the car to retrieve a slender laptop case, then walked crisply to the front door, straightening his red necktie and buttoning his dark suit jacket as he walked.
Autumn had left ten minutes earlier, weighed down by a tall stack of folders. She offered Mark several meaningful glances as she left. In return, he gave her a comic wave and a goofy grin, keeping it light. Nothing serious happened here, Autumn. Did it?
If only he could move back the clock. Would he move it? Maybe not. Moments before, he had kept his eyes on her long, slim legs under the short skirt as she bent to pick up the folders, and felt himself start to get erect again.
Am I crazy? What am I thinking?
Lea, I love you. Why didn’t you stay and watch out for me?
Oh, what kind of juvenile thinking is that?
Roz had returned with a trunk load of grocery bags and a screaming, hungry Axl. Mark emptied the car for her. He saw the twins tossing a tennis ball back and forth in the backyard. He thought about joining them. But it was time for his meeting with this man from the institute.
What was his name? Hulenberger? Something like that.
Mark had suggested they meet and have tea at the American Hotel on Main Street in town. That way there wouldn’t be kids underfoot, running in and out, demanding his immediate attention. Elena was already angry that he didn’t have time for a long discussion about the sleepover she wanted to have with Ruth-Ann.
But Hulenberger insisted on coming to the house. And here he was at the front door, all tanned and prosperous-looking in a designer suit that fit his slender shoulders perfectly and a crisp white shirt that contrasted his tan.
“Mr. Hulenberger? Come in.”
“It’s Dr. Hulenberger. But call me Richard. Everyone does. Even my kids.” A brief, hard handshake.
“Well, call me Mark. Come in. Welcome.”
Mark led him down the hall to his office. He could hear Roz in the kitchen, pleading with Axl to sit still. The back door slammed, and he heard Ira calling, “Anyone home? Roz?”
“Nice day,” Hulenberger said. “I enjoyed the drive. My wife and I have a house in Sagaponack, but we haven’t opened it yet. It’s almost May, but it still feels like October, doesn’t it? All the rain. Incredible. We probably won’t open up till Memorial Day. My wife hates the country. She always says she’d rather be on Madison Avenue. Ha.”
Was he talking so much out of nervousness? Or was he just a chatty guy?
Mark stopped at the office doorway and pictured Autumn bending over the desk again
. Her short skirt tossed up onto her back, black underpants around her ankles, and that smooth little ass . . .
Oh, God.
Would he see her there every time he walked into the office?
The whole left side of the desktop was empty. The papers and folders had all been swept aside. He wondered if Hulenberger noticed that something was odd.
He led him to the green leather couch against the wall. Hulenberger dropped onto the edge and sat up very straight, lowering his laptop case to the floor. Good posture. He slid a hand down his tie a few times. Nervous habit?
“Nice room, Mark. I like that photo behind your desk. I think I know those trees. From Brisbane, right? Australia? I walked in that very spot and admired those twisty roots all around the tree trunks.”
Mark nodded. “My wife is a travel writer. A good photographer, too. She writes about adventure travel. Seems a lot of people are into it.”
“Hannah and I were on a food and wine tour. We weren’t impressed with the food in Queensland at all. Dreadful. In fact, we didn’t have anything good to eat till we got to Sydney. Were you there with your wife?”
“No. She was on assignment. I had my patients. You know. And my book.”
Chitchat, chitchat.
Mark suddenly had a heavy feeling in the pit of his stomach. He rolled his desk chair in front of the couch and dropped into it. The room still smelled of Autumn’s lemony scent.
“Nice of you to drive out, Richard.”
Richard cleared his throat loudly. Adjusted his tie. “Well, I wanted to tell you in person. I didn’t think it was right to do it over the phone or by email. Too impersonal.”
“You mean—about the grant?” His voice suddenly tight.
“Yes. Should I come right to the point? I think I should. We’re not going to give you the grant, Mark.”
Can silence be loud?
To Mark the silence in the room seemed deafening. Without realizing it, he slammed his head back against the leather seatback, like someone showing shock in a cartoon.
“You mean . . . you’re not giving the whole amount? Only part?”
Richard sat even more erect. Mark saw a single bead of sweat appear above one brown eyebrow. “No. I came to offer our regrets. We can’t give you any of the grant money at this time.”
“But my studies . . .” Why can’t I finish a sentence? His hands left wet marks on the leather chair arms.
“We approve of your work. Wholeheartedly. That’s why we made the initial offer. We felt that your studies with juveniles would add considerably to the literature.”
Mark was distracted by movement at the office doorway. He turned and saw Samuel and Daniel standing there, hands in their jeans pockets, serious expressions on their pale faces.
“How long have you two been standing there?” He didn’t mean to sound so irritated. His mind was churning from the news of the grant money turndown. He should shout at Hulenberger, not the boys.
They didn’t reply. Both had their eyes on Hulenberger. Staring at him hard, as if giving him the evil eye. Then, without a word, they turned and vanished down the hall, bouncing a tennis ball on the floor.
He turned back to Hulenberger, who was defiantly gazing at him, not backing down, not avoiding his eyes after bringing this devastating news. Macho guy.
“So, Richard . . . Can you explain? If it isn’t my study . . .”
“It’s your book. Can I speak plainly? It’s the book. We understand why you wrote such an inflammatory thing. But that’s the problem in a word, see. It’s inflammatory.”
“But it’s a sincere study. It wasn’t skeptical in any way. I wasn’t just trying to make a buck with a piece of crappy pop psychology. I did my homework, Richard. I did years of research in addition to my own studies.”
Whoa. Blowing it. He’s sitting there coolly, and your voice is rising to soprano.
Richard kept his green-gray eyes on Mark, his face a blank. No emotion.
This man is a fish. I’ve seen eyes like that on a cod. He thinks he’s terrific. But he didn’t just fuck a beautiful twenty-three-year-old girl.
What am I thinking? Am I losing my mind?
“How can I say this, Mark? The book has attached a certain notoriety to you. I’m sure you won’t disagree with that.”
Mark didn’t reply.
“And the grant committee . . . well, we feel we can’t risk backing someone in your position, someone with that kind of controversy following him.”
Mark remained silent.
Richard sighed and shook his head. “The institute has such limited funds now. You know how much the government has cut our funding. They’re almost not subsidizing us at all. It’s a crime. This country will pay for the shortsightedness in Washington. In the meantime, we have to be very judicious about where we spend what little we have. And I’m afraid—”
Mark jumped to his feet, visibly startling his guest. “Okay. I get it. Thanks for coming out, Richard.”
Richard gazed up at him, swallowing hard. Mark realized he’d frightened the man. Richard thought Mark was about to get violent.
Maybe I should. Beat the crap out of him. What kind of notoriety would that bring me?
But he’d never been in a fight in his life. Not even on the playground. He’d never thrown a punch or wrestled another kid on the grass or come home with a black eye.
Mark was the good kid. The smart kid. The talker. The kid who was interested in how everything works. He always talked himself out of fights. He used psychology.
Richard finally climbed to his feet. He grabbed up his laptop case.
Why did he bring it? Did he just feel insecure without it?
He pulled out his phone and checked the screen. Then he tucked it back into his suit jacket. “I’m really sorry, Mark. I can see you are disappointed.”
“Yeah. That’s the word for it.”
“My only suggestion—if you want any advice from me—is to apply again in a few years.”
“A few years?”
“Yeah. Wait for the notoriety to die down. In a few years, people will forget your book, right?”
A smile crossed Mark’s face. “That isn’t exactly a compliment.”
Richard blushed. “You know what I mean. Wait for the controversy to fade. People have short attention spans. You know that, right? Apply again. I’m not guaranteeing anything, but—”
Mark led him to the door. “Do you believe in freedom of speech, Richard?”
“Well, yes. Of course.”
“But you don’t think I should put my findings and theories in a book?”
“I didn’t say that. The committee has to be careful. I know you understand that. You have a bestseller, Mark. No one begrudges you that. Some psychologists would kill for a bestseller like yours. This grant money—”
“Would have paid my mortgage for the next two years,” Mark interrupted. “And would have paid for my next book, which I hope will have the same notoriety.”
He pulled open the front door. He could see the twins playing catch at the side of Richard’s car.
“I’m sorry. I mean that sincerely.” Hulenberger stuck out his hand to shake. “I’m just the messenger here, you know. No hard feelings, I hope.”
Mark shook his hand. This time it was cold and damp. He watched him walk down the gravel drive to his car. He deposited the laptop in the passenger seat, glanced briefly back at Mark, then climbed behind the wheel.
One of the twins fumbled the tennis ball and went running down the driveway after it. “Be careful!” Mark shouted to them. “Get out of the way, boys. He’s going to back out!”
He didn’t watch Hulenberger drive away. Mark turned and walked into the house, feeling heavy, a headache forming just behind his forehead. He sighed. I need a glass of wine.
He found Roz in the kitchen, stirring a pot of tomato sauce. She had a gray long-sleeved T-shirt, torn at the neck, pulled down over the baggy denim cutoff shorts she wore nearly every day. She turned when he en
tered and read his expression. “Bad news?”
“You were listening?”
“No. The twins told me something bad was happening. That guy looked like the kind who’d bring bad news.”
Mark opened the refrigerator and pulled out an already opened bottle of Chablis. “Yeah, well. Bad news is right. I’m not getting the grant.”
She stopped stirring. “Because?”
“Because I’m too controversial.” He found a wineglass in the cabinet and poured it full. “Mainly, I think, because I’m too successful.”
“Yes. That’s your problem. You’re too successful and too rich.”
“I wish.” He took a long sip. “Guess I’m going to have to fill up my patient list. Put aside the next book for a while.”
The tennis ball bounced hard against the kitchen window. The thud made them both jump.
Roz smiled. “The twins are having fun.”
Mark took another drink. The wine wasn’t helping his headache. “Think they’re doing okay?”
“Yes. I think they’re happy. I know you don’t approve, but they love their little house back there. I’m surprised they’ve adjusted so well. Aren’t you?”
“I guess. I’d like to see a little more interaction between them and Ira and Elena. Of course, twins often keep to themselves.” He refilled his glass. The Chablis tasted a little sour. Or was that just his mood?
He thought about Hulenberger. The guy wasn’t actually smug, but he was totally unlikable.
“Can I change the subject?” Roz broke into his thoughts. “I’ve been thinking I need a night off. You know?”
“A night off? You have a date?”
“Is that your business? I just need a night off. Think you could hold down the fort? Watch Axl for me? You know. Take care of him for a few hours without killing him?”
Mark grinned. “Axl and I get along fine. I stuff him full of Oreos and tortilla chips and he’s a good boy.”
“That’s what makes you a good psychologist.”
“Lea gets home tomorrow night. Maybe she and I will have a special playdate with Axl.”
“Sounds like a plan. Go tell our four boarders it’s dinnertime, okay?”