A distaste for progress dissuaded Bolivia from embracing either junk food or the dizzying pace of contemporary life.
Homemade empanadas derailed development. Bolivians, stubbornly attached to the ancient flavors of the family hearth, continue eating without haste in long, slow ceremonies.
Gone forever is the company that everywhere else makes children happy, fires workers who try to unionize and jacks up the rate of obesity.
October 15
BORN FROM CORN
In the year 2009 the Mexican government authorized “experimental and limited” planting of genetically modified corn.
A clamor of protest arose from the countryside. Everyone knew the wind would spread this invasion far and wide, turning GMO corn into an unavoidable fate.
Many of the first villages of the Americas had been raised on corn: corn was people, people were corn, and corn, like people, came in all sorts of colors and flavors.
Will the children of corn, those whom corn begat, manage to resist the chemical industry’s mad dash to impose its poisonous dictatorship on the world? Or will we end up accepting throughout the Americas this merchandise that calls itself corn but comes in only one color and has no flavor and no memory?
October 16
HE BELIEVED JUSTICE WAS JUST
The English jurist John Cooke defended those no one else would and attacked the ones no one else could.
Thanks to him, for the first time in history the divine rights of kings bowed before the law of humans: in 1649, as lead prosecutor, Cooke charged King Charles I and convinced the jury with his well-argued case. The king was convicted of the crime of tyranny and the executioner cut off his head.
A few years later, the lawyer paid for his deed. He was accused of regicide and locked up in the Tower of London. He defended himself saying, “I simply applied the law.”
That mistake cost him his life. Every attorney knows that the law smiles at those above and spits on those below.
Today in 1660 Cooke was hanged, drawn and quartered in the very room where he had challenged royal power.
October 17
SILENT WARS
Today is International Day for the Eradication of Poverty.
Poverty does not explode like bombs or boom like gunfire.
We know everything about poor people: what they don’t work at, what they don’t eat, how much they don’t weigh, how much they don’t grow, what they don’t think, how often they don’t vote, and what they don’t believe in.
The only thing left to learn is why poor people are poor.
Could it be because we are clothed by their nakedness and nourished by their hunger?
October 18
WOMEN ARE PERSONS
Today in the year 1929, the law acknowledged for the first time that the women of Canada are persons.
Up to then, women thought they were, but the law disagreed.
The legal definition of persons did not include women, so the Supreme Court had decreed.
Emily Murphy, Nellie McClung, Irene Parlby, Henrietta Edwards and Louise McKinney drank tea and conspired.
And they trounced the Supreme Court.
October 19
INVISIBLE
Two thousand five hundred years ago, at dawn on a day like today, Socrates took a stroll around Piraeus with Glaucon, Plato’s older brother.
Glaucon told the story of a shepherd from the kingdom of Lydia who once found a ring, slipped it on his finger and realized that no one could see him. The magic ring made him invisible in the eyes of all others.
Socrates and Glaucon philosophized lengthily on the moral of the story. But neither of the two wondered why women and slaves were invisible in Greece even though they never used magic rings.
October 20
THE PROPHET YALE
In 1843 Linus Yale, inspired by something the Egyptians invented four thousand years before, patented the most invulnerable lock ever made.
Yale went on to secure the doors and gates of nearly every country, and became the greatest defender of property rights in the world.
These days, cities ill with fright are nothing but gigantic locks.
Few hands hold the keys.
October 21
THOU SHALT BLOW ONE ANOTHER UP
Back around the year 630 or so, a renowned Chinese physician and alchemist named Sun Simiao mixed potassium nitrate, saltpeter, sulfur, charcoal, honey and arsenic. He was seeking the elixir of eternal life; he discovered an instrument of death.
In 1867 the Swedish chemist Alfred Nobel patented dynamite in his country.
In 1876 he patented gelignite, better known as blasting jelly.
In 1895 he established the Nobel Peace Prize. As its name indicates, the prize rewards antiwar champions. It is financed with the fortune he harvested on the battlefields.
October 22
INTERNATIONAL DAY OF NATURAL MEDICINE
The Navajo Indians cure by chanting and painting.
Those medicinal arts, holy breath against unholy death, work alongside herbs, water and the gods.
Night after night for nine nights, the sick one listens to chants that frighten off the evil shadows in his body, while the painter’s fingers paint in the sand: arrows, suns, moons, birds, rainbows, lightning bolts, serpents and everything else that helps heal.
When the curing ceremony is over, the patient returns home, the chants fade and the grains of painted sand blow away.
October 23
TO SING
On sweltering spring nights in the southern half of the world, male crickets call to the females.
They call by rubbing their four wings together.
Those wings don’t know how to fly. But they know how to sing.
October 24
TO SEE
Scientists did not take him seriously. Antonie van Leeuwenhoek had no Latin and no degree, and his discoveries were the fruit of happenstance.
To get a better look at the weaves of the fabric he sold, Antonie began experimenting with combinations of magnifying glasses, and by putting glass to glass he invented a five-hundred-lens microscope that in a drop of water revealed a multitude of microbes swimming as fast as they could.
Among other triflings, this cloth merchant discovered red blood cells, bacteria, spermatozoids, yeast, the life cycle of ants, the sexual life of fleas and the anatomy of bee stingers.
In the same city, Delft, in the same month of 1632, both Antonie and the painter Vermeer were born. And in that city each of them dedicated their lives to seeing the invisible. Vermeer sought the light hiding in shadows, while Antonie spied on the secrets of our most diminutive relatives in the kingdom of this world.
October 25
A STUBBORN MAN
It wasn’t worth much in Colombia, the life of a man. That of a peasant practically nothing. The life of an Indian absolutely nothing. That of a rebel Indian less than nothing.
Nevertheless, inexplicably, in 1967 Quintín Lame died of old age.
He was born on this day in 1880 and lived his many years either in prison or in battle.
In Tolima, one of the scenes of his mishaps, he was jailed one hundred and eight times.
In the mug shots his eyes are always like stewed prunes from prison’s first hello, and his head is shaved to sap his strength.
Landowners trembled at his name, and no doubt death feared him too. A man of soft speech and delicate gestures, Quintín walked the length and breadth of Colombia urging indigenous people to rebel.
“We have not come like unyoked pigs to stick our noses in somebody else’s field. This land is our land,” Quintín would say, and his tirades were history classes. He spoke of the past of that present, the why and the when of so much misfortune: knowing the before, lets you create a different after.
October 26
WAR FOR DRUGS
After twenty years of cannon fire and thousands upon thousands of dead Chinese, Queen Victoria sang her victory song: China, which had banned drugs, o
pened its doors to the opium sold by British merchants.
While the imperial palaces burned, Prince Gong signed the surrender in 1860.
It was a victory for freedom: freedom of commerce, that is.
October 27
WAR AGAINST DRUGS
In 1986 President Ronald Reagan took up the spear that Richard Nixon had raised a few years previous, and the war against drugs received a multimillion-dollar boost.
From that point on, profits escalated for drug traffickers and the big money-laundering banks;
more powerful drugs came to kill twice as many people as before;
every week a new jail opens in the United States, since the country with the most drug addicts always has room for a few addicts more;
Afghanistan, a country invaded and occupied by the United States, became the principal supplier of nearly all the world’s heroin;
and the war against drugs, which turned Colombia into one big US military base, is turning Mexico into a demented slaughterhouse.
October 28
SIMÓN’S FOLLY
Today in 1769 in Caracas, Simón Rodríguez was born.
The Church baptized him as a párvulo expósito, a foundling, a child of no one, but he was the sanest child Hispanic America has ever known.
To punish his sanity, they called him “El Loco.” He said that our countries were not free, even if they had anthems and flags, because free people don’t copy, they create, and free people don’t obey, they think. To really teach, El Loco liked to say, is to teach to question.
October 29
GOOD-HEARTED MAN
In 1981, in a gesture of generosity that honors his memory, General Augusto Pinochet gave away the rivers, lakes and subterranean waters of Chile for a few coins. Several mining companies, like Xstrata of Switzerland, and power companies, like Endesa of Spain and AES Gener of the United States, became owners in perpetuity of the country’s mightiest rivers. Endesa received a watershed the size of Belgium.
Farmers and indigenous communities lost their rights to water and were obliged to buy it. Ever since, the desert grows ever larger, devouring fertile lands and emptying the countryside of people.
October 30
THE MARTIANS ARE COMING!
In 1938 spaceships landed on the coasts of the United States and the Martians launched their attack. They had ferocious tentacles, enormous black eyes that shot fiery rays and foaming V-shaped mouths.
Many horrified citizens took to the streets wrapped in wet towels to protect themselves from the poison gas the Martians emitted, and many more chose to shut themselves in behind locks and more locks, armed to the teeth, awaiting the final battle.
Orson Welles invented that extraterrestrial invasion and broadcast it over the radio.
The invasion was a lie, but the fear was real.
And the fear continued: the Martians turned into Russians, Koreans, Vietnamese, Cubans, Nicaraguans, Afghanis, Iraqis, Iranians...
October 31
THE GRANDPARENTS OF EDITORIAL CARTOONS
In the year 1517 German monk Martin Luther nailed his challenge to the door of All Saints Church at Wittenberg Castle.
Thanks to an invention called the printing press those words did not just stay put. Luther’s theses crossed streets and squares and entered the homes, taverns and temples of Germany and beyond.
The Protestant faith was being born. Luther attacked the Church of Rome’s ostentation and extravagance, the blatant sale of tickets to Paradise, the hypocritical chastity of priests and more.
His heresies spread not only by word. Also by image, which reached many more people since few could read but nearly all could see.
The engravings that helped spread Luther’s protest, works of Lucas Cranach, Hans Holbein and other artists, were not, shall we say, kind: the pope appeared as a monstrous golden calf, or an ass with bosoms and a Devil’s tail, or an obese man covered in jewels falling head first into the flames of hell.
Without intending to, these sharp instruments of religious propaganda paved the way for the editorial cartoons of our day.
NOVEMBER
November 1
DANGER! ANIMALS!
In 1986 Mad Cow disease struck the British Isles and more than two million cows suspected of harboring contagious dementia faced capital punishment.
In 1997 avian flu from Hong Kong sowed panic and condemned a million and a half birds to premature death.
In the year 2009 Mexico and the United States suffered an outbreak of swine flu, and the entire world had to shield itself from the plague. Millions of pigs, no one knows how many, were sacrificed for coughing or sneezing.
Who is guilty of causing human disease? Animals.
It’s that simple.
Free of all suspicion are the giants of global agribusiness, those sorcerer’s apprentices who turn food into high-potency chemical bombs.
November 2
DAY OF THE DEAD
In Mexico tonight, as every year on this night, the living host the dead, and the dead eat and drink and dance and get caught up on all the latest gossip from the neighborhood.
But when night comes to a close, when church bells and first light bid them adieu, some of the dead get lively and try to hide in the shrubbery or behind the tombs in the graveyard. People chase them out with brooms: “Get going,” “Leave us in peace,” “We don’t want to see you until next year.”
You see, the dead are real layabouts.
In Haiti, a long-standing tradition forbids carrying the casket straight to the cemetery. The funeral cortege has to twist and turn and zigzag to fool the one who has died, so he won’t be able to find his way back home.
The living minority defends itself as best as it can.
November 3
THE GUILLOTINE
Not only men lost their heads. Women, too, were decapitated and forgotten, since they weren’t important like Marie Antoinette.
Three exemplary cases:
Olympe de Gouges was beheaded by the French Revolution in 1793 to remove her belief that women were citizens;
in 1943 Marie-Louise Giraud climbed the scaffold for having performed abortions, “criminal acts against the French family”;
and the same year in Munich the guillotine sliced off the head of a student, Sophie Scholl, for handing out antiwar leaflets against Hitler. “Too bad,” Sophie said. “Such a fine sunny day and I have to go.”
November 4
THE SUICIDE OF TENOCHTITLÁN
“Who could lay siege to Tenochtitlán?” the songs asked. “Who could move the foundations of heaven?”
In the year 1519 messengers reported to Aztec king Moctezuma that several strange beings were on their way to Tenochtitlán. They spit thunder and had metal breasts, hairy faces and six-legged bodies.
Four days later the monarch welcomed them.
They had arrived on the very same sea by which the god Quetzalcóatl had departed in ancient times, and Moctezuma believed that Hernán Cortés was the god returning. He said to him, “You have come home.”
And he handed Cortés the crown and gave him offerings of gold: gold ducks, gold tigers, gold masks, gold and more gold.
Then, without unsheathing his sword, Cortés took the king prisoner in his own palace.
In the end, Moctezuma was stoned to death by his people.
November 5
A SICKNESS CALLED WORK
In 1714 Bernardino Ramazzini died in Padua.
He was an unusual physician, who always began by asking, “What work do you do?”
That this might matter had never occurred to anyone before.
His experience allowed him to write the first treatise on occupational health, in which he described, one by one, the most common illnesses in more than fifty jobs. He demonstrated that there was little point in treating workers who must swallow their hunger and live deprived of sun and rest in shuttered workshops that are airless and filthy.
November 6
THE KING W
HO WAS NOT
King Charles II was born in Madrid in 1661.
During his forty years he never managed to stand up or speak without drooling or keep the crown from falling off his head, a head that never hosted a single idea.
Charles was his aunt’s grandson, his mother was his father’s niece and his great-grandfather was his great-grandmother’s uncle: the Hapsburgs liked to keep things close to home.
So much devotion to family put an end to them.
When Charles died, the dynasty in Spain died with him.
November 7
DREAMS
One night in 1619, when René Descartes was still quite young, he dreamed all night long.
As he told it, in the first dream he was bent over, unable to straighten up, struggling to walk against a fierce wind that propelled him toward school and church.
In the second dream a bolt of lightning knocked him out of bed and the room filled up with sparks that illuminated everything in sight.
And in the third, he opened an encyclopedia, looking for a way to live his life, but those pages were missing.