Now she stirred. “That was self—”
“Self-defense. Right. Because he was armed and attacking, but Gabe and I—we could have stopped him. Could have let him live. Could have taken him down another way . . .”
And she remembered. When he’d shot Matthew—he’d gone for a hit in the shoulder. And even when he’d fired at Troy, the first hit hadn’t been a kill shot.
She swallowed and listened. She wanted to hear everything he had to say.
“I was just as angry as Gabe. Just as fucking furious because I saw what he’d done to her. Amy was good. Always a good person. And I cared about her.”
A tear slid down her cheek because there was so much grief in his voice. She hated for Wade to be in pain.
“And I let her the fuck down. I should’ve found her sooner. I should have done something. When I saw that prick, when I saw him laughing at what he’d done to her—crazy asshole—something snapped in me. I wanted to stop him. Gabe just beat me to the punch.”
Her heartbeat was slowing. His arms were so warm around her.
“I didn’t grow up easy. My dad died when I was young. It was just me, my mom, and my . . . brother.”
Silence. She barely breathed.
“Adam was the good one, baby. I was the rebel. The troublemaker. I was the one who took the risks. Not him. He was sixteen and he’d always looked after me. He looked after everyone. Adam was the fucking hero . . .” His breath roughed. “Until the very end . . .”
“Will you tell me what happened?” They’d both revealed so much. He’d helped to heal her pain. She wanted to heal his.
“A kid went out too far. Some little guy—maybe around six. He got caught in an undertow. I didn’t even notice—too busy with my own shit. But Adam noticed. He ran out there, didn’t even hesitate. He got that kid out and he was coming back. When he was coming back . . .” His breath rasped out. “I saw him then. I was on the beach, watching. Why the fuck was I still on the beach? I should have already been in the water, but I’d just been screwing around and I saw him with that kid and—a wave hit.”
Goose bumps covered her arms.
“It was a big wave, and when it cleared I didn’t see him. Didn’t see him or the kid.”
Another tear slid down her cheek.
“I ran into the water. Other people were running then. Trying to help. My mom was screaming. I—I was a good swimmer and I got out there first. I grabbed and I touched someone.”
She waited.
“It was the kid. He was choking and crying and he held onto me so tightly.”
“Wade . . .”
“I—I swam back to shore—just close enough that I could give him to one of the other people out there, then I went straight back out. By then half a dozen people were in the water. We were all looking for Adam. Searching so hard. But he was . . .” Wade’s words trailed away.
She knew what he’d been going to say.
Lost.
She pressed closer to him. All she wanted was to comfort him. To take away that pain.
“He must have gotten swept back into the undertow,” Wade murmured. “I fucking hate the water.”
She knew that he did, and now she understood why.
“Three days. It took three days of searching on boats, of getting the Coast Guard and divers out there, before they found my brother.”
“I’m so sorry.” She held him as tightly as she could. “So sorry . . .”
“My mother just . . . she broke for a time after that. It was like I heard you say to Jim. She was just . . . there. Going through the motions. I could see it. Nothing I could do seemed to get through to her. She didn’t laugh. She didn’t smile. She was like a ghost, one being forced to hang around the living.” His voice was so sad.
He’s breaking my heart.
“I couldn’t make her want to fight. I couldn’t help her. And when I was nineteen, she passed away. Just . . . got sick. Pneumonia. She withered away right before my eyes.”
He’d carried all of this? This pain? And she hadn’t known. He’d always seemed so confident. Strong. Happy.
And . . .
Victoria kissed his jaw. His cheek. His lips. She just had to kiss him. To let him know—
Wade, I’m sorry. Wade, I care. Wade, I—
Love you?
She eased back, stunned by the force of her own emotions.
“I joined the military. I swore that I would be as good a person as Adam had been. I would help people. I would make a difference. I would do my best to make him proud.”
“I’m sure he would be very proud of you.”
She felt him tense against her. “Adam was the good one. I think I just went through the motions.”
“No.” Victoria snapped out that denial. “That is absolutely not true. You are the best man I’ve known, Wade. You’re strong and brave and you—”
“We both know I have a dark side, Viki.”
“That doesn’t make you a bad person!” she threw right back, desperate for him to understand. “You are good, Wade. I know it. I’ve always known it. You do help people. You help me. You help so many at LOST. You make a difference.” He’d changed everything for her.
“You make a difference, too.” His voice was so solemn. “I hope you know that, baby. You make a big difference for me. Because I’m not going through the motions any longer.”
It was hard for her to breathe. He’d heard so much of her talk with Jim, but she’d never even thought Wade—
All this time, he was in as much pain as I was.
“I’m living,” he whispered. His lips pressed to hers. Did he taste the salt of her tears? She thought that he did. In the darkness, they just held each other. And, maybe, maybe they both healed.
“I love you,” he said, voice growing a bit husky, sleepy. “That’s not going to change. We’ll go day by day, and one day, you will trust me enough.”
“Enough?” She could barely whisper that one word.
“Enough to love me back. Enough to know that you can count on me, through good times and fucking bad times. Enough to know that I will always have your back, and that, for me, you will always be the one who comes first.”
She wanted to have a future with him. A life. Could they do that? Go for kids? The whole picket fence? Knowing what they did—having seen the violence out there, could they really do all that?
“One day at a time,” Wade whispered. “Because we have plenty of days ahead of us.”
He bent his head and pressed a kiss to her lips.
WHEN THE PRIVATE plane touched down in Atlanta, Ana Young was there to greet them. Petite and delicate, physically she seemed the very opposite of her brother.
But she had Asher’s dark, almost pitch-black hair. And her eyes were the same deep brown—though flecked more with gold.
And they shared scars.
Ana’s scar wasn’t on her chin. It was a faint slash that slid over her top lip.
She greeted them with a cautious smile and a quick handshake. “It’s a pleasure to be working with you,” Ana said. “I’ve, um, got a van waiting and I’ll take you both home so you can get some much-needed rest.”
Home. Odd, when Ana said that one word, Wade’s image flashed in Victoria’s mind. She glanced over at him—and found his stare on her.
“Great to see you, sis,” Asher murmured. He scooped his sister up in a massive bear hug. “Nightmares?”
It was the faintest of whispers, but Victoria was standing so close to Ana that she heard the question.
She also saw Ana’s nearly imperceptible shake of her head . . . and the way Asher’s shoulders seemed to relax.
The twins had secrets. But Victoria wasn’t about to pry. Why would she?
“It’s a pleasure to be working with you, too,” she
told Ana, and the smile she gave the other woman was real. “Your ears should have been burning because your brother was telling us how amazing you are during the flight. I know you’ll be an asset to LOST.”
Relief swept across Ana’s pretty face. “I just want to help.” The words seemed blurted out. “Just help.”
“You will,” Victoria said with certainty. That was what LOST did, after all.
And they were growing. Getting stronger and bigger every single day.
As promised, Ana had a van waiting for them out front. They climbed in and soon they were sweeping past the familiar streets of Atlanta. The buildings passed in a blur. Wade was the first one to be dropped off at his place, but before he climbed out, he gave Victoria a long, lingering kiss. “See you soon, baby,” he said.
Yes, he would.
She watched him walk away.
Asher cleared his throat. “Gabe was a bit, um, worried, that you two might not have gotten along so well in the field.”
She smiled. “Don’t worry, we got along just fine.”
“Yes, ma’am. Definitely see that.”
They headed to her place. When she climbed out of the van and stared up at her building, it almost seemed foreign to her. Cold and empty.
“Are you all right?”
She glanced back at Ana’s question. “I’m fine.” She would be, from now on. Her hands tightened around her bag.
“You sure you don’t want me to get that?” Asher asked her.
Victoria laughed. “Trust me. I’ve got this. But thanks.” She gave them a little wave. “See you in the office soon.”
Because it was time to get back into her normal routine. Life at the office. A home here.
She took the elevator up to her floor, dropped her bag near the front door and walked toward her windows. She looked out at the city below. She’d always felt so safe up there, but now . . .
She felt alone.
WADE’S PHONE RANG. He heard its echoing cry when he stepped out of the shower. He’d crashed for hours after he got home, and when the sun set, he’d finally managed to wake up enough to wash the hell of travel off his back.
He knew his machine would pick up the call, so he didn’t hurry too fast toward the hallway, not until he heard Victoria’s voice.
“Wade?”
He nearly fell, rushing with his wet feet and slipping over the tile.
She gave a little laugh, the sound transmitting easily from the speaker on his answering machine. “I know I just saw you but . . . I miss you. That’s crazy isn’t it? But . . . but I was thinking . . . want to grab a drink? That’s what normal couples do, right? They get a drink? How about we meet up tonight? At the place where you pretty much changed everything for me.”
He was surging for the phone.
“If you want to come, I’ll see you there in an hour. If not . . . then I’ll see you soon.”
He swiped for the machine.
But she’d already hung up. He started to call her back but . . .
Baby, I’m coming for you.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
THE BAR WAS too crowded. The bodies too sweaty. The music was too loud. The laughter too fake. Victoria had noticed all of that before when she’d gone to Wild Jokers, but none of that had bothered her. She’d just wanted to get lost in the throng of people.
To escape.
She wasn’t looking for escape this time. She was looking for him.
Victoria settled in at the bar. She waved to the bartender and he nodded, indicating he’d be her way soon. Then she glanced over her shoulder, looking toward the entrance. It had been almost an hour since she’d left that message for Wade. She needed him to walk through that door. Excitement bloomed inside her as she waited.
The bartender came back, took her order, and when she sipped her apple martini a few minutes later, the sweet taste rolled right over her tongue.
Again she looked back toward the door.
Warm hands settled around her waist, making her jump and sending some of that apple martini spilling over her chin and down the front of her top.
“Welcome home.”
The hands were a heavy, possessive weight on her hips, and she spun in her chair because the voice wasn’t Wade’s.
“Flynn,” she said, her eyes widening as she took in the blond male before her. The man she’d left the bar with just days before. They’d gone into the back alley . . .
And Wade had changed everything.
“Hey there, gorgeous.” Flynn flashed her a wide smile, one that made his green eyes gleam and his dimples wink at her. “Missed you while you were in Savannah.”
She and Flynn . . . they’d been lovers. Once. No commitment, no—
Strings.
Her gaze darted over his shoulder and to the door. “How did you even know I’d gone to Savannah?” She hadn’t mentioned that to him, had she? Hadn’t she just said that she was leaving for a case?
He laughed. A rich, deep rumble. “You told me. When we ran into each other on my morning jog.” He took a seat on the bar stool next to her, but he leaned in close, crowding her with his body. “Though you didn’t give me any more details. You and your mysterious cases . . .” His hand reached out and his thumb gently slid over her chin.
Victoria jerked away from his touch.
His brows shot up. “Easy. You just had a little bit of drink on you.” He brought his thumb to his mouth and licked away the moisture.
She shot off her stool. “No, Flynn, it’s not happening.”
He laughed again. “What’s not?”
Flynn had always been so easygoing. No pressure. And he was fine with no strings. She wasn’t.
“I’m meeting someone tonight. The guy—the guy from the alley.”
“Your partner.” His face darkened. “I didn’t like the look of him, Vik. Too intense. Dangerous.”
No, Wade wasn’t dangerous, not to her. “We’re together,” she said flatly. She wasn’t going to play around with some other guy while Wade was on his way.
Flynn nodded. “Fine, Vik, fine. As long as you’re happy . . .” He took a bottle of beer and saluted her with it. “Good for you.”
Her shoulders relaxed.
Then Flynn glanced around the bar. “But if you’re so together . . . why isn’t he here?”
WADE RAN OUT of his apartment. He was running too damn tight on time. Gabe had called, wanting a full update because Dace had contacted him . . . trying to tie up loose ends.
The call with Gabe had gone long. And now he was rushing to get over to that bar and meet Victoria. No other bozos had better even think of moving in on her—
What the hell?
Wade stopped right next to his motorcycle. A motorcycle with very flat tires. Tires that hadn’t just deflated—close examination showed that they’d clearly been slashed.
His bike had been fine earlier. He’d checked it out briefly right after he got home. Then he’d crashed.
Now, though . . .
I can’t get to Victoria this way.
Sonofabitch. He jogged toward the main street and saw not a single fucking taxi. He needed to call Victoria but—
The cops in Savannah kept her phone. She’d contacted him from her landline before, he’d seen her number on the caller ID. When he’d talked with Gabe before, Gabe told him that he was taking care of replacing both his and Victoria’s smart phones. That replacement really needed to hurry the hell along.
He started jogging down the road. There had to be a taxi somewhere. This was Atlanta, for shit’s sake. He’d find a ride, and he would get to Victoria.
VICTORIA GLANCED DOWN at her watch. “It’s only been an hour.”
“What?” Now Flynn sounded shocked. “You’ve been waiting on the jerk for an hour?” He hopped off his stool and reached for her ha
nd. “No way. Absolutely not. You don’t wait for some fool. Come on, dance with me.”
So meeting at Wild Jokers hadn’t been her best idea ever. At the time, everything had seemed to start for her and Wade right there . . . and it seemed like—maybe a fitting place to meet. She’d thought they could dance, get a drink, and then go back to her place.
“Dance with me,” he said again, flashing his dimples.
His dimples were cute, but he wasn’t Wade and she was far past the point of being interested. “No.” She pulled her hand away. “He’s not late. This is when he should be arriving, and I know he’ll be walking in that door any moment.” She gave him a weak smile. “I am sure there are plenty of other women who would love to dance with you, Flynn. They’re probably already lining up.” She put down her money on the bar top. There was a booth close to the door. She’d go wait over there. Victoria pushed her way through the crowd. She was wearing heels—ones that were a bit higher than normal, and she’d dressed as sexy as possible.
For Wade.
For herself.
She wanted to look good for him. She wanted to let go, with him.
“Here you go.”
And Flynn was back. Only this time he held up a martini glass—one filled with green liquid. “Your favorite,” he said, and he put it on the table in front of her. “My way of saying sorry for spilling your drink before.”
Her shirt was already drying.
“When Prince Charming gets here,” Flynn continued, “I hope you two have a great night. Really.” He gave a quick nod. “You deserve some happiness after the rough times you’ve had.”
Then he slipped away, vanishing into the crowd.
Her fingers rose and curled around the long stem of the martini drink. She stared into the liquid and wondered . . .
How did Flynn know about my hard times?
Her breath sucked in on a quick inhale as she glanced around, but he was gone. Long gone. Had he dug into her past, researched her the same way that she’d caught Wade doing that one night?